Proper funeral and wake attire?

[HauntedMansionGeek]

in the case you described, hanuntedmansionfan, the woman with the cell phone should have taken the call out to the hall. it's not disrespectful to excuse yourself to take an important call. it is disrespectful to take a call in the room where the wake or funeral is actually being conducted. whatever her intentions, she was inconsiderate of the people around her who were there to grieve for the party whose funeral it was. [/B]

Sorry. I won't judge a person who's stressed out about things......my attitude toward her was much worse than her boo-boo of taking/making a phone call in a public setting.
And if I remember correctly, before I KNEW about the circumstances of her phone call, I DID sit there and judge her with "WHY doesn't she do that somewhere ELSE?"

Yes, I do agree that people are often inconsiderate of those around them.

So what else is new? *shrug*

 

[CamColt]

Last summer my FIL's wake and funeral were on the 2 hottest days of the year. 2 people showed up in shorts. I was completely shocked! Yes it was hot, but all the other people who dressed appropriately survived, even the guys in suits.

 

[snoopy]

I'm usually a clothes snob, and I certainly feel that one should dress appropriately when going on a job interview (I'll just bring up the pink lady before anyone else does), but I have to say that when my parents died I never noticed what anyone was wearing to their funeral.

After my mother's funeral, my SIL was having a fit over one of our friends showing up in her workout gear. She is a personal trainer, and she came to the funeral straight from work. SIL was horrified, but I was just so grateful that this friend could make it, that I never even remember what she had on. The support she extended was far more obvious than the clothing she was wearing.

The cell phone is rude, period. The person on the phone, regardless of what the conversation was about, should have excused herself and gone outside to take the call.

 

[Gette88]

Originally posted by iNTeNSeBLue98
I would understand if the person came from work, in their work attire, if they didn't have an opportunity to go home and change. I try to wear black or dark clothing and it's usually something nice, like I would wear to the office. PLEASE turn off the cell phone or keep it outside! The lanyard should have been left in the car or tucked under her shirt. How can people be so direspectful?

My thoughts exactly.

 

[CourtasanSatine]

Jen: Your dog is a cute little gy

 

[shoes99]

A friend of mine passed away at the age of 45. Everyone at the wake was dressed appropriately. The deceased, my friend Harry, was dressed in a purple NBA sweat pants outfit. His father said to me, my son usually didn't wear a suit, so I dressed him in what I thought was appropriate. He looked fine to me.
Michele

 

[grinningghost]

I have a huge problem with the whole dress code/funeral thing. To me, the attire should coincide with what the deceased felt comfortable around. For me, I would feel much more comfortable around a group of people in jeans and t-shirts than suits and dresses. I would hope when I go, that people will wear what they like. When my grandmother passed away, my DH was a pall bearer. He was much closer to her than any of the other pall bearers, as he drove her to and from church in the last years of her life, all the other male pall bearers probably didn't even SEE her in her last years. DH wore a t-shirt and jeans. The rest wore suits. Draw your own conclusions.

 

[fireplug]

I agree the cell phone would be rude. Take it outside.

As far as the clothing..................

If the deceased was more used to seeing me dressed up than dressed casual, I would dress up. If it were more of a casual friendship, again I would dress casual. The importance is that you show up and show your feeling for them. NOT what you wear.

Steve

 

[Blondie]

At my 20 y.o. nephew's viewing last week, every single person (and there had to be over 300 that showed up) was in dark dress clothing. Not one single person, young or old, were in jeans. We were part of the receiving line, so I got to see everyone.

The viewing and mass all took part in the church. I didn't hear one cell phone ring. In this day of constant cell phone usage, that impressed me. I was surprised at the man with a 15 month old little girl though, who did nothing but whine and cry the entire time.

 

[jipsy]

Cell phone - take it outside.

Clothing - as long as it's clean and in good taste (i.e. no hooker outfits, etc.) who cares?

Disney Lanyard - please! That could have been left in the car.

 

[Talking Hands]

When I die I don't are what people wear. As long as there is an interpreter there for my deaf friends I will be happy. And please do wear your lanyards and trade. Because in doing so you will be doing what I enjoy in life. Don't mourn me just clebrate what I love in life, Disney, pins and Deaf Culture.

 

[grinningghost]

I would be thrilled if people came to my funeral wearing Disney lanyards and Mickey shirts - but that's because I'm a Disney fanatic. It would be cool. But I guess if I go to someone's funeral who is not a Disney fan, and I wear my Mickey shirt, I might look a tad stupid.

 

[DonnaS]

Originally posted by jipsy

Clothing - as long as it's clean and in good taste (i.e. no hooker outfits, etc.) who cares?

Well, I think if it is a hooker who died, then it might be okay if mourners wear hooker outfits IMO. Especially, if they are coming right from work.

 

[C.Ann]

I hate to admit it, but my DH's family wins first prize - hands down - when it comes to inappropriate attire and inappropriate behavior..

Two weeks ago his sister died and while attending the wake and funeral, I simply couldn't believe my eyes! Family members wearing filthy, torn, greasy jeans (and they don't work, so that excuse won't fly) - Harley D tee shirts - flag bandanas wrapped around their heads - several "hooker" outfits - skin tight red leather pants - halter tops - flip-flops - cut-off's - and one of my all-time favorites, the "I LOVE BINGO !!" tee shirts..

If the attire wasn't bad enough - this woman had 6 kids and 14 grandchildren that she loved with her heart and soul.. Always, always sacrificed for them - doing without herself.. Two of her KIDS and two of her GRANDCHILDREN came to the services...

But wait - it gets worse.. ONE of her kids (that somehow managed to show up) was serving BEER out of a cooler in the trunk of his car AT the funeral home!!!!!

All I can say is there's "low class" and then there's NO CLASS AT ALL !!!!

I think I would have GLADLY taken a cell phone incident over what I witnessed at those services..

 

[chell]

Personally, I want to dress respectfully. But others can wear what they want I guess. I've had to learn the hard way that I shouldn't worry about what they are wearing, even if I don't approve. It just isn't good for me. You know? I'm trying to make this make sense without sounding like a complete idiot.

But wait - it gets worse.. ONE of her kids (that somehow managed to show up) was serving BEER out of a cooler in the trunk of his car AT the funeral home!!!!!

He was SERVING it? Gee! I thought my uncle's viewing was bad. There were several guys there that were drunk, including another uncle. I think some of them had a stash in their car and would run out to get more. Then there were they guys who were high! Actually I think they went out back at the funeral home to smoke it! I just don't understand.

 

[DonnaS]

C.Ann,
OMG that sounds horrible. At least he wasn't selling the beer out of the cooler.

 

[nhrenee]

Originally posted by DonnaS
Well, I think if it is a hooker who died, then it might be okay if mourners wear hooker outfits IMO. Especially, if they are coming right from work.

LOL!
I think as long as you are dressed in clean clothing, it shouldn't matter what you're wearing.