Pregnant women, kids and busses...

[Hannathy]

I am teaching both of my children to be respectful, but I refuse to teach my son to arbitrarily give up his seat just because the person is a woman. Men and women are treated equally now in work and sports as it should be. If you want a seat for sure be in the number of people there are seats for or wait for the next bus. If you choose to board when it is standing room only then guess what you chose standing and shouldn't expect a seat. Now I never put things on a seat and always hold my kids if seats are needed .

 

[2poohbears]

I am teaching both of my children to be respectful, but I refuse to teach my son to arbitrarily give up his seat just because the person is a woman. Men and women are treated equally now in work and sports as it should be.

I would never suggest that one should give up their seat just because someone is a woman. I don't expect that at all. I do, however, think it is disrespectful for a perfectly healthy 16 year old to sit and laugh at a 70 year old man or woman or a very pregnant woman with a toddler who has to stand while the 16 year old is still sitting. IMO that's just bad manners.

 

[DisneyMommyMichelle]

My mom cannot stand on a bus. So that we don't come to expect people to give her a seat we just wait for another bus. That way my mom gets a seat and I don't have to get upset if no one offers one to her.

i agree with this! like i said before we do the same thing

Use common sense, people. If you need and/or really want a seat, wait for another bus. Don't criticize other people because you have crammed on a bus that is over full and then expect people to give up their seat to make "you" more comfortable. We have given up our seats many times, but we have also waited 20 extra minutes for a bus when we really wanted a seat and didn't feel like standing. I don't think that makes us selfish or shows bad manners, it's just COMMON SENSE.

I have to agree with this too. Yes, you do have to wait a long time if you want a seat, but it's better than depending on other people who really are just as tired as we all are

 

[mama4]

What a kind boy!

Thank you for the comment! He is very kind and I'm proud of him!

 

[Hannathy]

Believe me if either of my kids laughed at an elderly person struggling they wouldn't have teeth to smile with! I was referring to the poster who wanted all Moms to teach there son's to give up seats for women just because they are women, which I disagree with.

 

[tiff211]

Why not just wait for the next bus? That's what we did, I told DH there was no way I was standing with the little ones and he agreed so we just waited for the next bus. I would never get on a crowded bus with the expectation of someone getting out of their comfortable seat for me and mine. I would get up myself for an elderly person but that's it. If the buses were too much of a problem, I would rent a car and drive to the parks.

Also, personally, I hated getting "special" treatment when I was pregnant even from DH. Don't help me up, reach for my arm, offer me a seat, I would say I am just pregnant, not disabled, I can do it myself. I was on the commuter train once, very fine and comfortable standing, and I moved my bag just so and the woman next to me saw the protruding belly and made a big fuss about all the men sitting while I stood. They were buried in their papers and I was only six months and you couldn't really tell yet. About 10 men stood up, I was mortified!!!!

 

[rigs32]

I do, however, think it is disrespectful for a perfectly healthy 16 year old to sit and laugh at a 70 year old man or woman or a very pregnant woman with a toddler who has to stand while the 16 year old is still sitting. IMO that's just bad manners.

I completely agree with you. The only problem is that at Disney, we are surrounded by strangers. The laughing should NEVER happen, but you can't always tell someone's health. For example, I'm a young healthy woman but I have weak ankles, and occasionally after a long day at the parks, standing on a bus ride and be potentially dangerous for me as I won't be able to hold myself properly if the bus is jerky. You'd never know that, but might be fuming at me. If you really need a seat, I'd suggest asking nicely rather than stewing in anger.

 

[java]

One time my son (8 at the time) got up to let an older woman have his seat(and she was way older- cane ect...) Before she could sit a 20 something jumped into the seat. It took my DH getting involved for the guy to get out of the seat. When my son pointed out to him that the woman was going for the seat he kind of shrugged and didn't budge. But when DH stood up to tell him- he quickly moved. We avoid the buses at all cost. (stay on the monorail and drive to MGM and AK.) When I was pregnant in NYC on the subway there were men that would push me out of the way to get to a seat. The ones that would offer me a seat were always the people that you would normally be a little afraid of(dirty, homeless looking)- That was 12 years ago and it opened my eyes as to who I should really be afraid of.

 

[Gillian]

It's always good to remember (and teach our kids) that you can't always tell who is healthy by the way they look. I'm working with my kids on respecting their elders by letting them sit first, eat first, etc. My 3 year old is not getting it, and keeps saying "that's my chair" when grandma or her aunts sit in her vacated seat. Like I said, we're working on it!

We do find that with the little ones and my health issues (mostly ok, but sometimes have problems with feet/legs) it's just easier to drive. Even to the Magic Kingdom. We know our way around pretty well, and it's really no problem, especially if you get there early.

 

[ducklite]

While it is the considerate and polite thing to do, no one should ever feel obligated to give up their seat.

It should be done because someone wants to, not because they feel obligated to.

If you are waiting in line and see a bus filling, you always have the option of waiting for the next bus to arrive.

Courtesy goes both ways.

Anne

 

[jbdreamer]

While it is the considerate and polite thing to do, no one should ever feel obligated to give up their seat.

It should be done because someone wants to, not because they feel obligated to.

If you are waiting in line and see a bus filling, you always have the option of waiting for the next bus to arrive.

Courtesy goes both ways.

Anne

Well said. If you are squeezing yourself onto the bus, you can't expect the people that waited in line longer then you to give up their seat just because you have kids. We are all hot and tired, and we all deserve our seat.

Unless you are truly struggling to stand, I'll be keeping my seat.

If you take the Disney Transportation you have to expect to stand some of the time. If having to standing makes you upset, maybe you should just rent a car.

 

[my4kids]

these threads can get really, really nasty very quickly. Many people have hidden issues that can't been seen. Yes, you may think its a prefectly healthy person just sitting while you are standing, but there maybe issues you may not be able to see.

One thing I have learned on the Dis, NEVER make a judgement call about things other people are doing that you may not agree with. There maybe a good reason that has nothing to do with manners.

Oh please. Yes I am sure that on each bus there may be one or two people with "hidden issues" My Dad is one of these, but he feels terrible that he is not steady on his feet and can't give his seat to a pregnant woman or a woman holding a child. So he politely apologizes and says "I'm sorry, if I could stand up straight I would let you have my seat" and people always reply "Oh, don't worry about it" and then some healthy person nearby overhears and gets the hint and gives up their seat. But you can't tell me that everyone on the bus has a problem. I have been holding a baby and not been given a seat and it is digusting. I have been 9 months pregnant and not been given a seat...Just because someone may have a hidden issue doesn't mean we can't teach a heathy children to be polite human beings...or if you have a child that has a balance problem etc...teach them to politely apologize that they can't give up their seat...maybe someone nearby will over hear and help the person out.

 

[tarheelmjfan]

I agree with Tiff. When I was pregnant there was absolutely no reason why I couldn't stand. I couldn't always bend over , but standing wasn't a problem. I don't mean to sound harsh, but being pregnant is only for 10 months. If I couldn't enjoy the parks as I would if I weren't pregnant, I'd wait to go.

I say this, because I have one of those hidden issues that people often complain about. I'm 38 with arthritis in my back & knees & I have a deteriorating spine. I look perfectly healthy, until you see me walking for awhile. I was in much better shape to stand, when I was pregnant than I am now. Unfortunately, my condition isn't going to change & I can't just wait it out. I agree that we shouldn't be so judgemental. You never know what the other person's situation is. My DH & DS(14) do stand up. When I was healthy, none of us thought it was a big imposition to do so.

 

[my4kids]

I agree with Tiff. When I was pregnant there was absolutely no reason why I couldn't stand. I couldn't always bend over , but standing wasn't a problem. I don't mean to sound harsh, but being pregnant is only for 10 months. If I couldn't enjoy the parks as I would if I weren't pregnant, I'd wait to go.

I say this, because I have one of those hidden issues that people often complain about. I'm 38 with arthritis in my back & knees & I have a deteriorating spine. I look perfectly healthy, until you see me walking for awhile. I was in much better shape to stand, when I was pregnant than I am now. Unfortunately, my condition isn't going to change & I can't just wait it out. I agree that we shouldn't be so judgemental. You never know what the other person's situation is. My DH & DS(14) do stand up. When I was healthy, none of us thought it was a big imposition to do so.

I'm confused, are you saying your healthy son and husband shouldn't have to give up their seat to a pregnant lady because she is only in that situation for 10 months and you didn't have any problems when you were pregnant? Or am I misreading your post? I was fine standing with my first pregnancy too, but not with my 3rd and 4th. It ws torture for me to try to balance on busses with them....so you see, different pregnant people have hidden issues too, so if you are healthy, just give them the benefit of the doubt, it is called BEING POLITE.

 

[SadieDog]

I also think if people are having to stand that parents could put their 3, 4, 5 even 6 y/o on their laps so others can have a seat. Last year I was having to stand with our 3 month old DD. While young children had seats to themselves that could easily sit on the parent's lap. Finally a man at the back of the bus motioned for me to take his seat. DH was having to hold onto our stroller and other 2 kids 5 & 8 to make sure they wouldn't fall down. We have never allowed our kids to have a seat to themselves when others are having to stand.

I agree with this completely. Little kids can sit in their parents laps and not take up seats while others are standing. I find this very inconsiderate.

 

[Hannathy]

If it was truly torture why didn't you as others have said simply wait for another bus. You chose to get on a standing room only bus and you had to stand so why were you suprised? I don't consider being pregnant a disability either.

 

[my4kids]

If it was truly torture why didn't you as others have said simply wait for another bus. You chose to get on a standing room only bus and you had to stand so why were you suprised? I don't consider being pregnant a disability either.

Have you been pregnant before?

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

One time my son (8 at the time) got up to let an older woman have his seat(and she was way older- cane ect...) Before she could sit a 20 something jumped into the seat. It took my DH getting involved for the guy to get out of the seat. When my son pointed out to him that the woman was going for the seat he kind of shrugged and didn't budge. But when DH stood up to tell him- he quickly moved. We avoid the buses at all cost. (stay on the monorail and drive to MGM and AK.) When I was pregnant in NYC on the subway there were men that would push me out of the way to get to a seat. The ones that would offer me a seat were always the people that you would normally be a little afraid of(dirty, homeless looking)- That was 12 years ago and it opened my eyes as to who I should really be afraid of.

I had to laugh at the image of your husband standing up and the guy jumping. I was in a similar situation (although inadvertently) about 15 years ago on the Moscow metro. In Russia there is a very clear heirarchy of who gives seats to who. One day I was on the subway when a man got up from his seat. I looked around, and didn't see anyone who "outranked" me (e.g. everyone I saw standing was a young man) so I started towards the seat. A grandmotherly looking lady took her bag and slammed it on the seat, glaring at me. I turned around and there was a VERY elderly lady waiting outside for the doors to open. I had missed her when I looked around. Of course I apologized a bunch of times -- but that look!

I have also been on the Moscow subway when a man comes on who is acting "innappopriately" shall we say (drunk, leaning on the women next to him, making lewd comments etc . . . ) There were several "Babushki" on the other side of the subway car and they proceeded to kick all the men off the benches on their side and call to the women opposite to join them. We ended up with a "gender segregated" car.

Maybe what WDW needs is a few more Babushka's!!!

 

[Hannathy]

Yes, twice and worked in a physical job both times. Like I keep saying simply wait for the next bus, just because you are pregnant does not make you entitled.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

This issue always drives me crazy. We teach our kids to be polite and dh would never sit (or would I) if someone needed it more than us. That being said- all of you who suggest wating for another bus - sometimes that is just not possible. One trip down we went to the boardwalk for dinner. We had to wait over an hour for a bus with 2 small children (2 & 8 months). The bus was packed. We had no choice but to get on as we didn't know when another one would be along. I had to stand holding my 2 children while dh had to wrangle the double stroller and bags. The bus driver even told us to leave our stroller!!! Yeah right! Not one person even offered their seat! There were thes super sweet girls from Jersey that were there on a convention for bath and body works and they were so nice. They helped me with the kids and said it was disgusting that nobody offered their seat. Now if you don't want to offer me your seat fine- but don't talk to my kids and tell me how cute they are. That annoys me to no end. A seat finally did open up at the next stop and I went to sit with the kids but and elderly couple was getting on the bus and I could tell by the look on their face that there was no way they could stand so we gaveup the seat to them. I then had to explain to my 2 year old why we did it. (sometimes people need it more then us etc.) Some of those adults should have listened up. So you see- we would have waited for another bus but we had already waited over and hour and didn't know when another one would be coming. Oh- and when I went when I was 7 months pregnant with my 3rd child and at WDW hardly anyone ever offered up their seat - even on the monorail. I don't feel like I can't handle standing while pregnant- I obviously walked around the park, but being on a moving vehicle while standing while not having the best balance is no fun. We do try to wait until we can get a seat but sometimes it just isn't possible.