Pregnant women, kids and busses...

[juligrl]

Okay, let me preface this by saying that I always surrender my seat on a bus to anyone who is elderly, pregnant, or too short to reach the handholds (kids) when there is no seating left on a bus.

DH, DD (then 2) and I (then obviously 7 mos. pregnant) traveled to Disney in January. On most bus trips we had practically empty busses, but there were occassions when we would be packed like sardines with one of us carrying DD and standing on a bus with non-pregnant/childless/young adults sitting comfortably by laughing at our plight.

Based on our experiences, next time I might not be so quick to surrender my nice comfy seat to somebody who might be more in need. Help me change my mind on this!

 

[Mom to Jordan]

Don't forget that sometimes there are things that you can not see. My healthy looking teen age son has some balance issues from being premature that makes standing on the bus not only hard but not very safe. He does it sometimes anyway but it is hard. My DH has back trouble and sometimes after walking all over the parks he just can not stand up any longer. If there are no seats on a bus, we sometimes wait for the next one. If we take the first bus that comes, any of us if able will give our seat to anyone that apeers to need it worse than us. If however we are willing to wait for another bus because some of us need a seat, we do not always do that but someone on the bus may not understand the whole story. It is hard not to judge and sometimes hard to judge fairly.

Jordan's mom

 

[letsgoagainsoon]

Yes, I think it is inconsiderate when perfectly healthy, capable people do not give up their seat for someone who obviously needs to sit more than they do. I had to hold DS1.5 more than one time on our last visit to Disney, and it isn't easy or safe. I will continue to give up my seat for someone who needs it more than I do.

 

[2poohbears]

I was there the end of JAN and beginning of FEB this year with 2 1/2 year old twins. We were very lucky to ride with kind people, because on every bus someone gave up their seat for me when we needed it.

It is very disheartening to find that some people just are not considerate like that (teens and college students seem to be the worst offenders, IMO). I try not to stoop to their level, though. Maybe my example will make them think next time and give up their seat to someone who needs it more. Don't let other people change your kind nature---you'll set a great example for your children to follow when they see you caring for others.

THANKS to all those nice people who show kindness to fellow travelers! May your good deed bring you good fortune in return!

 

[mama4]

We were lucky this last trip as well. I was 7 1/2 mths pregnant and when getting on the buses from the parks I would always be holding my sleeping 2 yo ds, my 14 yo ds would be holding my sleeping 4 yo ds and my dh would be wrestling the stroller and bags We must've looked pretty ridiculous. Anyway, the one time we saw no seats available, a couple (probably late 20's) jumped up and insisted on us taking their seats. I very graciously did so Btw, my dh never sits down on the buses- unless their are empty seats available of course- because he's expecting parents w/ kids to need the seats. He just stands as close as possible to the door with the stroller as out of the way as he can get it....and never once has he complained about it. Juligrl, hopefully you'll be on our bus next time.

 

[emma'smom]

We were there in March and I found myself on packed buses many times while standing and balancing my sleeping three year old in my arms. Almost every time, someone offered me a seat. Only problem was that a few times...the number of parents holding sleeping children outnumbered the number of seats available! Thanks to all who did give up their seats....it made things much easier!

 

[DisneyMommyMichelle]

Happened to us plenty of times when i was 7months pregnant last year and we had dd with us who was 9months old!! We would just get off hte bus and wait for another and DH still gave up his seat when the time came for anyone else. it's vacation and we just took it with a grain of salt.

Once we were leaving DTD and we hopped on the bus and were seated but at the Pleasure Island stop an ECV came on and we had to stand up (we were in those seats) All 3 of us were left standing with no one offering us seats, so we hopped off and waited at the Pleasure Island stop 3 times for sitting space. We had great conversation though AND DD fell asleep in my arms, it was wonderful and in a way romantic! haha (we just try to make the best of everything)

sorry this is such along post but in the end we have learned and we will have a car this year!!!

 

[fakereadhed]

Mothers- let's go on a crusade to teach our little guys to be "real men" and give up their seats for the women, children, and the elderly. That's the only thing that will change this situation.

When DH gives up his seat as usual, I will point out what he is doing and why. When others don't give up their seats, I will later tell him that they should be more like Daddy.

When did we stop teaching our kids to respect others? Apparently it was in the 70's because that seems to be the age of the people that are only for themselves.

And for the record, I would stand in a heartbeat if a mom to be, child, or elderly person was standing.

 

[DisneyMommyMichelle]

good idea FakeReadHed!

 

[DaisyD]

My mom cannot stand on a bus. So that we don't come to expect people to give her a seat we just wait for another bus. That way my mom gets a seat and I don't have to get upset if no one offers one to her.

 

[powellrj]

these threads can get really, really nasty very quickly. Many people have hidden issues that can't been seen. Yes, you may think its a prefectly healthy person just sitting while you are standing, but there maybe issues you may not be able to see.

One thing I have learned on the Dis, NEVER make a judgement call about things other people are doing that you may not agree with. There maybe a good reason that has nothing to do with manners.

 

[GoofyGirlnPrincessV]

Mothers- let's go on a crusade to teach our little guys to be "real men" and give up their seats for the women, children, and the elderly. That's the only thing that will change this situation.

When DH gives up his seat as usual, I will point out what he is doing and why. When others don't give up their seats, I will later tell him that they should be more like Daddy.

When did we stop teaching our kids to respect others? Apparently it was in the 70's because that seems to be the age of the people that are only for themselves.

And for the record, I would stand in a heartbeat if a mom to be, child, or elderly person was standing.

My DS (now almost 15) has been taught since he was a little guy to be a gentleman. For the most part he is an of course has his teen times too...LOL

When we went in Dec the three of us were sitting and he was on the aisle. A woman abut my age got on the bus and stood next to him. He got up and said that she could have his seat.

She looked at him and made a comment about not being old and she was capable of standing. He shrugged and said that he was just trying to be a gentleman and gave her a smile.

I think she was taken back by his manners and smiled at him then sat down next to me and said that she did appreciate that he had manners.

 

[fakereadhed]

My DS (now almost 15) has been taught since he was a little guy to be a gentleman. For the most part he is an of course has his teen times too...LOL

When we went in Dec the three of us were sitting and he was on the aisle. A woman abut my age got on the bus and stood next to him. He got up and said that she could have his seat.

She looked at him and made a comment about not being old and she was capable of standing. He shrugged and said that he was just trying to be a gentleman and gave her a smile.

I think she was taken back by his manners and smiled at him then sat down next to me and said that she did appreciate that he had manners.

Bet you were so proud of him! Times like that make all the hard work worthwhile.

 

[Reese]

We were there in Feb. I was 7 months pregnant and we had an 18 month old, 5, 6, 8 and 13 year old. So if the bus was crowded we just waited for the next one. Dh and DS would always give up their seats as it was the proper thing to do. We did witness many men stand in order to let someone else sit down. My three middle children would all squish into two seats to leave another one open for someone.

You can't let other people determine how you will act. Keep true to your own moral compass, it will always guide you the right way.

 

[Disney01]

Use common sense, people. If you need and/or really want a seat, wait for another bus. Don't criticize other people because you have crammed on a bus that is over full and then expect people to give up their seat to make "you" more comfortable. We have given up our seats many times, but we have also waited 20 extra minutes for a bus when we really wanted a seat and didn't feel like standing. I don't think that makes us selfish or shows bad manners, it's just COMMON SENSE.

 

[spoiltrotten12]

Yes, I think it is inconsiderate when perfectly healthy, capable people do not give up their seat for someone who obviously needs to sit more than they do. I had to hold DS1.5 more than one time on our last visit to Disney, and it isn't easy or safe. I will continue to give up my seat for someone who needs it more than I do.

I agree. My DH held our DD (who was 1 at the time) last year. I hate standing on buses, but if there are people who need it more than I do then I would gladly give up my seat. However, I do expect the same in return, especially since we have 2 young children. Am I wrong to expect this?

 

[KristiKelly]

I also think if people are having to stand that parents could put their 3, 4, 5 even 6 y/o on their laps so others can have a seat. Last year I was having to stand with our 3 month old DD. While young children had seats to themselves that could easily sit on the parent's lap. Finally a man at the back of the bus motioned for me to take his seat. DH was having to hold onto our stroller and other 2 kids 5 & 8 to make sure they wouldn't fall down. We have never allowed our kids to have a seat to themselves when others are having to stand.

 

[beattyfamily]

I can totally see both sides of this issue.

I do like seeing kindness and gentlemen giving their seats to older people, pregnant women or a parent carrying a baby and my DH ALWAYS gives up his seat to a lady or older person etc... every single time. We always put our kids on our laps and I teach my girls (7 and 10) to give up their seats to old people or pregnant women.

But I can also understand that everyone's tired after a long day at the parks and they've probably been waiting a long time for a bus to show up and so maybe they really don't want to give up that seat they waited a long time for when you could have easily waited for the next bus to be guaranteed a seat.

 

[mama4]

My DS (now almost 15) has been taught since he was a little guy to be a gentleman. For the most part he is an of course has his teen times too...LOL

When we went in Dec the three of us were sitting and he was on the aisle. A woman abut my age got on the bus and stood next to him. He got up and said that she could have his seat.

She looked at him and made a comment about not being old and she was capable of standing. He shrugged and said that he was just trying to be a gentleman and gave her a smile.

I think she was taken back by his manners and smiled at him then sat down next to me and said that she did appreciate that he had manners.

That was very sweet of your son. My 15 yo ds is the same way (a typical teen but truly a respectful, good-hearted person.) He has also offered his seat, helped people w/ doors, etc. He is especially tuned in to helping mom's w/ small kids because he sees how much I struggle sometimes w/ my 2 and 4 yo ds's when we're out and about. I must say I probably would've reacted the same way the woman did when your son offered his seat though. Not that I would be offended in any way. I would just feel strange taking a seat from anyone unless I were pregnant or holding a child. We're all tired after walking around in the parks. I'm 34 and not in perfect shape but as able bodied as anyone so I wouldn't expect a man (younger or older) to give up his seat just because I'm a woman. BTW, I still will respect and appreciate anyone offering their seat (or any other acts of chivalry)and I will always respond with gratitude.

 

[spoiltrotten12]

My 15 yo ds is the same way (a typical teen but truly a respectful, good-hearted person.) He has also offered his seat, helped people w/ doors, etc. He is especially tuned in to helping mom's w/ small kids because he sees how much I struggle sometimes w/ my 2 and 4 yo ds's when we're out and about.

What a kind boy!