potty training 6 year old dgd with autism

[thumpersfriend]

Well, my dgd who has autism turned 6 last month and she is not potty trained. My dil and son have tried so much and they are just beside themselves about what else to try. They try to bribe her, put her on the toilet all the time. She just refuses to try. She can repeat all the steps but she won't go . Does anyone have any ideas? Any ideas are much appreciated. She will be with me for about a week in April and I thought if I have to I will devote the whole week on this. She starts to get really upset if we press her too much. Do you think she may never be potty trained?

 

[mechurchlady]

Sometimes never but I have heard as late as age 10. The experts will be along later. Mom had it easy with me as I pooped on schedule, lol. She would just take me to the pot and leave me and voile instantly trained.

The key is getting into her brain and finding out why she would potty train. Neurovariants are God's gift to us as a game to solve. Neurovariants are a puzzling lot that can baffle even the keenest minds and for some that is fun and others a trip to the looney bin (parents not the kids, lol). I am having fun figuring out my mother's neurovariations. i am a bit looney so maybe that helps me with the puzzle solving.

You need to talk with her and see what she says. Fear, illogical, no need to do something and lots of other stuff could be behind her not being potty trained.

hugs and chocoaltes and good luck
Laurie

 

[bookwormde]

There are several issues to consider. First is sensory issues, it may be that she does not really sense when she needs to go, also the issue of not liking a “full” diaper may not “bother her” so why from her perspective why change what works (using a less absorbent diaper might help with this). The second may be something about the bathroom environment or process might be stressful or uncomfortable for her. The third is just teaching the skill.

My suggestion would be to build a visual skill chart for her and start working though the “process” one step at a time, from sensing the need to “go” all the way trough turning out the light when she is done. Avoid any pressure, just work on it like any other skill. Whatever level of modeling they are comfortable with is very helpful, again giving her the step-by-step “demonstration”.

bookwormde

 

[lucigo]

We took pictures of our son in every step involved in using the bathroom from his perspective. For the actual "going" we had to photoshop a yellow stream because he had never gone. So there were lots of pictures, from walking into the bathroom to washing hands afterwards. At the end we made the last picture of the nintendo as that was the reward of the day. We then put the pictures into a powerpoint and let DS watch the program, all he had to do was click the space bar to get to the next frame. He watched it over and over as he was very intertested in the computer...and then miraculously he went in the bathroom and WENT! I almost missed it!

There were several months of trials and tribulations but that was really the ahh ha moment that started the process.

If she likes to watch TV you could also try video modeling using her as much as possible as kids seem to respond to seeing themselves succeed even more than watching other kids.

Good luck!

 

[thumpersfriend]

thanks for the advice. She loves the computer and is actually better at it than I am. It's been very stressful because the teachers at Chloe's special ed kindergartern keep saying that she has got to be potty trained as if they are not trying. Good advice, keep it coming. Thank you very much.

 

[bookwormde]

Any teacher that says that needs a lot more education.

bookwormde

 

[Piper]

Any teacher that says that needs a lot more education.

bookwormde

I agree!

 

[Disneylvr]

My 6 year old with autism is still potty training but we are getting much closer to the end. Madelyn has a visual schedule both at home and at school. We use actual photographs of her and her daily routines including toileting. We set a timer and she sits on the potty every 30 minutes and she must stay their for 5 minutes or until she is successful. We give her a small food reward when she uses the potty. If she actually uses the potty then I might set the next timer for 60 minutes. At home it is important to keep your dgd in underwear rather than pullups or a diaper. She needs to realize how uncomfortable it feels to be wet.

Good luck!!!! My dd would be trained if she knew how to communicate that she needs to go. We are working on that right now.

 

[aceandmee]

I have a couple of friends that have used this method. Maybe it will help you as well.

http://educ.ubc.ca/faculty/pmirenda/ToiletTraining/toilet_training.01.htm

Here is the info summarized:
It is borrowed from a book called Toilet Training for Everyone
The author Pat Mirenda

1) For one week, check your child's diaper every 15 minutes through out the waking day. Chart when it is wet or spoiled.

2) Look at the chart and calculate the average period of dryness between urination. also look for patterns ~ do they wet themselves right after meals? right after naps? Is there a usual time of day they have a bowel movement?

3) Create a schedule based on your findings. e.g. start right after rising from bed and every 1 1/2 hours after that. You may need to alter the schedule to go 10 minutes after a meal and again after a nap

4) Purchase big boy/girl underwear and waterproof pants in case of accidents. This ensures the child will feel wet if they have an accident

5) Read the social story to your child twice a day for several days. The social story is a series of laminated cards that show in pictures the journey of going to the bathroom. You can see them on the link above or click on this link

6) Have an auditory timer and set it for 5 minutes before the expected time they will need to go

7) Take the child to the toilet every time the timer rings, regardless of where you are. This ensures the child will learn to use the toilet everywhere when required. Use the social story and walk through each step as you do it.

8 ) If your child has an accident, say nothing, just clean them up and start your timer from the point for the next period of time

9) When your child has a success, celebrate with praise, assurance and then give them the reward you have decided upon. This reward is only given when they actually do something in the toilet, not for just sitting. If it is a toy or activity limit it to 5 minutes so that it will retain its reward quality

10) When your child has achieved being dry for two weeks on a schedule begin to stretch the time by 5 minutes a day. You are hoping for them to begin attending to their own signals and initating that they need to go. You might begin to notice signs they are feeling the need to wiggle. Bring it to their attention. This way they learn to attend to and interpret their own state

11) Expect accidents at first. Be patient ~ this is a learning process

12) When the child is fully trained for two weeks you can start phasing out the reward. If it is an activity or toy you will be able to just let them have it for longer until it is no longer important to them to have it.

You may choose to do bladder training first and bowel training separately using the same method.

 

[DisDreaminMom]

I am just not that into charts. My kid is not into charts either. For him, it was a fear of toileting in several areas. First, I figured out that he was actually afraid he would go down the toilet. I guess that's not that strange when you think about it. So we talked a lot about what will go down the toilet and what won't. The noise is also very intense and can really be an issue at flush time. Some toilets are so loud and it is very upsetting.

I got him several toy sized toilets to play with. Dollhouse furniture sets have these, and some times you can find other small play toilets. We investigated toilets and visited every toilet at every new place we went for several months. I found that some toilets are scarier than others because of the sound of the flush, the opening of the hole, the size of the seat, etc. We also made lots of pictures, got plumbing books from the library, etc.

It took me about a month of serious "investigation" with my son, never even actually using the potty until he decided that he wouldn't get sucked down the toilet. I didn't make him use it, but I sure did make him face his fear and be rational about it.

I also think some toilet seats are too cold, hard, etc. I got a soft seat for my son and it worked like a charm until he got in the hang of it at home. Get her a cute pink, cushy toilet seat from Wal Mart for the week she is there. It is a small investment compared to big kid diapers. Tell her it's a magic toilet seat that won't let her fall in.

I'm just saying that you can chart stuff all you want to, but if you don't address the actual problem, then it won't help. I know I'm not supposed to be afraid of being on an airplane, statistically, but that doesn't mean I'm not hysterical while I'm on the darn thing! And my kid had watched so many people use the toilet that he KNEW what to do. He was just too scared to try.

Good luck. You may be surprised about the actual cause of avoidance for your GD. I would try talking about it when she's very calm and secure and you are having quiet time, if possible. If not, then try getting her used to it gradually and with very calm non-verbal cues.

Tell your family not to take it too hard about this, either. Life has too much pressure to feel like a failure over the toilet, for Pete's sake.

 

[bookwormde]

I am a great believer that much of the “toilet” fear in older children who are beginning to use the toilet comes from the representation in many of the older cartoons where getting flushed down the toilet is a used a comedic tool but if perceived as having a “real world” basis can be extremely scary.

bookwormde

 

[disneyohbear]

My 6 year old with autism is still potty training but we are getting much closer to the end. Madelyn has a visual schedule both at home and at school. We use actual photographs of her and her daily routines including toileting. We set a timer and she sits on the potty every 30 minutes and she must stay their for 5 minutes or until she is successful. We give her a small food reward when she uses the potty. If she actually uses the potty then I might set the next timer for 60 minutes. At home it is important to keep your dgd in underwear rather than pullups or a diaper. She needs to realize how uncomfortable it feels to be wet.

Good luck!!!! My dd would be trained if she knew how to communicate that she needs to go. We are working on that right now.

This worked for us. My autistic nephew is 6 and using a set schedule of going to the bathroom has really done wonders for this. The school takes him at the same times every day and then when that worked we flowed it into his days off. We did the every hour when at home after school. He is 90% there and will now even go on his own to the bathroom. He even gets thru most nights although we still use pullups for a safety at night.

Our problems now are when he gets really involved in something sometimes he would rather be wet than leave what he is doing but those times are getting fewer and fewer. Leaving him in just his underwear (no pants just long tshirts on him around the house) really helped. There was just something about all the layers of clothes that made him resist going when he needed to.

His rewards were more computer time and lots and lots of praise which he loves.

Good Luck. I know we are so proud of our little one for getting this task tackled.

 

[rjthkids]

We habit trained my 6 year old (very low verbal, blind and M.R. in addition to the autism) over Christmas. We followed a fabulous plan put out by a medical team in California. It worked like a charm.

First thing was checking readiness cues. A child must be able to remain dry for at least an hour interval (showing they have control), be able to follow a direction to sit on the toilet, and be able to sit on the toilet for 20 minutes without tantrums at least 80% of the time. When they can do those things you can try his program.

The other thing about his program was TWO WEEKS. Pull 'em out of school (or do it when there isn't school already), take vacation time from work, and do nothing but devote two weeks to this.

We had four children six and under....I stay home and homeschool, but I made my husband take leave (he's military) so he could take care of the other three while I did nothing but devote my every waking moment to my oldest DD.

I will go and try and dig up the exact program because it was very long and detailed. But basically, it involved putting her in underwear, setting a timer and taking her to the bathroom every five minutes (nope, not joking, it really was every five). There was a whole procedure about going to the bathroom--- "Oh DD! Let's check if you are wet or dry. Oh, you're dry. Do you have to go pee?" (if a child is verbal you wait for a yes, and "o.k. let's go" or a "no" and you then say "that's o.k., let's practice.) My DD was not really verbal so I would respond for her "Let's go practice." I'd then take her to the bathroom and have her sit on the toilet for 5-10 minutes with a prized toy only for use in the bathroom. If she didn't go, I'd take her off and say "Good job practicing." Let her go and do her thing and repeat again five minutes later.

(I should say the whole time I was pumping her full of as many liquids as she would tolerate, also part of the program).

I watched her like a hawk so the instant she started to pee in her underwear we RACED to the bathroom! I'd say "OH! You're wet! Pee doesn't go ______ (insert place she had an accident), pee goes in the potty! Let's practice!" Then you practice taking them from the spot they had the accident to the bathroom, five or 6 times in a quick row. Then repeat back to the every five minutes.

When she DID pee on the potty, it was a great show with a coveted candy reward. "You PEED in the potty! Great job!" With the reward.

It was painstaking, but because I was watching her all. the. time. the instant she started to have an accident I was right there to correlate and "train" the right response immediately.

For our daughter the biggest hurdle was that she had excellent control (was waking up every morning dry), but she thought she was supposed to go in a diaper. Add in the fact she's blind, she really didn't have any comprehension of the fact that no one ELSE was going in a diaper but didn't have the cognitive capacity to grasp the whole thing. Once I was able to get her used to the new place to go, we were very successful. I had her pee trained in 6 days, poop trained in the two weeks.

Now, that said she still will not verbalize that she has to go, so I have to take her and tell her to go or else she will wet/poop herself still. We haven't had a pee accident in forever because I just take her every couple of hours. Poop is a little harder because while I have her try a couple of times a day, I can't always predict when she has to go, so we probably have a poop accident once a week.

Still, it's MILES better than where we were. I'm so glad I no longer have to really worry about public restrooms and changing a 6 y.o. in public any more.

I feel for them. It's just hard. And hopefully they're not beating themselves up because I know it is very common for kids with autism and other DD to not potty train until 9 or 10. There is nothing wrong with implementing a plan when a child is ready and able and needs the nudge/coaching/instruction, but nothing is going to MAKE them be ready when they're not.