Please Help With a Sensitive Topic...Sort of OT

[LWatson]

Again thank you. I am trying really hard not to stress. We did evrything we could to be careful so if I end up pg then it really was meant to be. My dr told be that pg symptoms can be similar to PMS symptoms but if you have enough hormones to feel the changes of pg then you have enough to register on a HPT (this is what he told me when I thought I waspg with my last) . So we will wait and see.

If you want to get perm. birth control even after he has done a vasectomy you can look into the Essure procedure. Its just as effective as the T.L. but no "surgery" is required. It does take 3months to complete the full process, but that is done by your body not by the doc.

 

[ksumn1]

I had many issues a few years ago, a fear of pregnancy, self esteem issues etc and the intimacy in our marraise suffered alot. After getting the Mirena IUD, I can honestly say that it has made a huge dinfference in my life. I'm not afraid to get pregnant, and my hormone levels and mood swings have evened out. I really feel much better overall. I think your husband's willingness proves how concerned and understanding he is of your fear, but I must agree that you may feel better if YOU take the lead on the BC issue.

Also, I agree that there is much truth in the fact that you have to accept that if you do all you reasonable can to prevent pregnancy and it still happens then it's simply meant to be. DH and I argued for about a year (from the time oldest DD was 2 1/2 to 3 1/2) about having another baby. Oldest DD was a suprise and DH just wasn't ready for another baby. I was soooo ready. After many talks, arguments and tears, I accepted that DH wasn't saying no for forever, just for a couple of years. We wanted to get on better financial footing, spend time together, and grow up a bit. (He was 17 and I was 20 when oldest DD was born). I made my peace with it. We saved up some money and took oldest DD to WDW when she almost 4. I became pregnant sometime during the week at WDW. I was on the pill, and we used condoms as well as watching my ovulation dates and avoiding fertile days, and STILL became pregnant. And to be honest, I was a bit upset. But I love my daughter. She was my gift.

But after she was born, I knew it was time to really explore better BC options. I tried the patch, the Nuvaring and finally the Mirena IUD. ALso tried Depo years earlier but the weight gain and mood swings were so horrible I wouldn't even consider it this time. I love the Mirena.

Good luck to you, OP. I hope everything works out OK.

 

[laceemouse]

If you want to get perm. birth control even after he has done a vasectomy you can look into the Essure procedure. Its just as effective as the T.L. but no "surgery" is required. It does take 3months to complete the full process, but that is done by your body not by the doc.

You hear lots of old stories about people getting pregnant after their husband had a V but the way they do it has changed. It used to be that the tubes could grow back together, now they leave little clips in there so that is NOT possible. Have his doctor explain all of that to you.
I think you using BC after he has a V is overkill and NOT necessary (after he has been rechecked of course.) My husband had the V a few years ago, the new method, and we have had NO PROBLEMS at all. We enjoy being together frequently. He would be miserable if we were only together a couple of times a month, I would too!! I can't imagine any marriage remaining strong and intact with that kind of stress and worry messing up your s*x life

 

[kristinw3girls]

I've got to confess that I feel the same way and I've had a hysterectomy!!! I KNOW_ CRAZY- I just know that if anyone would be that freakish weird but true story of pregnancy without uterus- it would be me!!!My DH just rolls his eyes and I get past it, but I must admit that it crosses my mind!!

 

[PaulaSue]

Time to really think about getting your tubes tied. Mine were tied and cut so the best BC you can have, IMO

IT is so not worth the worry, this one worry you can have taken care of and relax. Many worries you can not control.

 

[mom2faith]

I am NOT trying to scare you here. But I need to share a small but of info.

Friends of ours had the Vasectomy (well he did ). It did not work - 2X!!! Please be sure your DH goes back for the "test" after the surgery. It will make you feel better!!!!

They often joke how an unplanned pregnancy could've ruined their marriage if he had not gone for the follow up test (he thinks he was snipped, she gets preggers, he thinks she is cheating, etc...).

Anyways, not to scare you, but after the surgery get him to go for the "test" and your fears should be alleviated

Good luck to you!!!

(PS We have the opposite problem, can't seem to have #2. So after 3 years of "scheduled" intimacy - well...let's just say that is not good for the marriage either!! Hugs to you!!!)

 

[Darcy03231]

If this is the way you feel, I would discuss TL with your Dr. I had it done over 10 years ago and its a wonderful feeling not to have to worry about BC. I'm one of those women who the minute I stopped being careful was pregnant (never made it through the first month).