PETERSON PLEADS TEMPORARY BLONDNESS
Perpetually Changing Hairdo Could Deadlock Trial, Lawyers Hope
In a high-risk gambit to gain their client's acquittal, lawyers for Scott Peterson today entered a plea of "temporary blondness" in the opening phase of his Modesto murder trial.
The rarely used legal strategy is designed to introduce doubt into the minds of the jurors by having the defendant dye his hair a different color every time he appears in court.
By coloring, cutting and otherwise coiffing Mr. Peterson's hair so that his appearance changes drastically on a daily basis, his legal team hopes to confuse and disorient the jury to the point that it becomes deadlocked.
Adding to the jury's potential confusion is the fact that, while Mr. Peterson's hair seems to be turning steadily darker, the hair of his former mistress, Amber Frey, seems to be growing increasingly yellow.
But Dr. Kenneth Dupree, a professor at the University of Minnesota School of Law, said that by entering a plea of temporary blondness Mr. Peterson's lawyers are employing the legal equivalent of a "Hail Mary" pass in football.
"Clearly, they are trying to draw the jury's attention to his hair color and away from other matters, such as what he was doing buying a big storage drum and huge bags of cement," Dr. Dupree said.
At a minimum, Dr. Dupree said, entering a plea of temporary blondness could buy the defense some time while the Peterson team's private investigator, O.J. Simpson, continues to look for the real killers of Mr. Peterson's wife.
The defense team said that as of today Mr. Simpson had made "significant progress" in obtaining evidence that links the murder to Colombian drug lords, Patsy Ramsey, and/or Saddam Hussein.
**** BOROWITZ REPORT ****
Perpetually Changing Hairdo Could Deadlock Trial, Lawyers Hope
In a high-risk gambit to gain their client's acquittal, lawyers for Scott Peterson today entered a plea of "temporary blondness" in the opening phase of his Modesto murder trial.
The rarely used legal strategy is designed to introduce doubt into the minds of the jurors by having the defendant dye his hair a different color every time he appears in court.
By coloring, cutting and otherwise coiffing Mr. Peterson's hair so that his appearance changes drastically on a daily basis, his legal team hopes to confuse and disorient the jury to the point that it becomes deadlocked.
Adding to the jury's potential confusion is the fact that, while Mr. Peterson's hair seems to be turning steadily darker, the hair of his former mistress, Amber Frey, seems to be growing increasingly yellow.
But Dr. Kenneth Dupree, a professor at the University of Minnesota School of Law, said that by entering a plea of temporary blondness Mr. Peterson's lawyers are employing the legal equivalent of a "Hail Mary" pass in football.
"Clearly, they are trying to draw the jury's attention to his hair color and away from other matters, such as what he was doing buying a big storage drum and huge bags of cement," Dr. Dupree said.
At a minimum, Dr. Dupree said, entering a plea of temporary blondness could buy the defense some time while the Peterson team's private investigator, O.J. Simpson, continues to look for the real killers of Mr. Peterson's wife.
The defense team said that as of today Mr. Simpson had made "significant progress" in obtaining evidence that links the murder to Colombian drug lords, Patsy Ramsey, and/or Saddam Hussein.
**** BOROWITZ REPORT ****
