PD For A Smooth Adoption!! SAD UPDATE~

[lynetteSC]

Wow! I am so sad this has happened. We also had a failed adoption a few years ago. As hard as it is to realize now, there is a special baby God has in mind for her. Saying that, we have some friends that this same thing happened too ... 1 week later, the girl called the agency and said she didn't realize how hard it would be to do this, so our friends ended up with the baby.

Regarding the letter in the paper, our ad said if you are the father of "baby boy doe" born on birthdate had to contact the number by such and such date. We have a birthfather who signed away his rights, but we wanted to be 100% sure and didn't want to risk anything later down the road. Our bmom signed 24 hours after the birth and in our state it is FINAL once bmom signs.

Good luck to your friend.

 

[luvsmickeymouse]

So sorry this happened to your friend.

This is exactly the reason why, if I ever adopt, I will not adopt domestically. I can't bear the thought of even the slightest possibility of this happening.

This is exactly why we adopted our oldest son from Korea in 1988 and our youngest son from The Phillipines in 1991.

We were expecting a daughter from Korea also, but she passed away from SIDS while still in Korea. We still have her pictures out.

 

[Tinkerbelle739]

to your friend DisneyDmbNut

 

[ZachnElli]

Regarding the letter in the paper, our ad said if you are the father of "baby boy doe" born on birthdate had to contact the number by such and such date. We have a birthfather who signed away his rights, but we wanted to be 100% sure and didn't want to risk anything later down the road. Our bmom signed 24 hours after the birth and in our state it is FINAL once bmom signs.

Good luck to your friend.

Yes, we were told they could put Jane Doe had a baby by John Doe in the paper and that was good enough. Strange, huh? Our birthfather signed the papers and we did a dna test to be 100% sure, best way to handle it.

 

[kdibattista]

As heartrending as it is, the adoption in this case was hardly "final". This is how misinformation about domestic adoption gets spread, and it irks me. Once an adoption is *final*, barring proof of fraud or duress, they are just that--final.

We are in the process of adopting internationally and this is one of the reasons. I understand this adoption wasn't final but look at how much was invested in it... emotionally. I am not putting domestic adoption down but you do have a certain "comfort level" when adopting internationally. Quite frankly, I don't think this is the thread it should be discussed on.

Thoughts and prayers to the family.

 

[mamajoan]

um... giving up a baby for adoption is absolutely the most difficult decision ever to be made in life... I pray for the birthmom and the child. This was not easy for anyone.

OP I wish your friends success in building their family.

 

[AnaheimGirl]

you do have a certain "comfort level" when adopting internationally.

It all depends on each family's comfort levels with all aspects of the adoption. There are other considerations in deciding between international and domestic adoption, but I've often seen them ignored in the quest to reduce the chance of a failed adoption. Please note, I'm not saying that you or anyone else in this thread have ignored them in your decision to adopt internationally, but since they weren't mentioned in this thread, it would appear to the casual reader that there is nothing else to consider. I also don't want to turn this thread into an adoption debate, but it's sometimes hard not to respond.

Isn't it great that there are different options, and we can all choose the method of forming our families that suits us best?

 

[kdibattista]

It all depends on each family's comfort levels with all aspects of the adoption. There are other considerations in deciding between international and domestic adoption, but I've often seen them ignored in the quest to reduce the chance of a failed adoption. Please note, I'm not saying that you or anyone else in this thread have ignored them in your decision to adopt internationally, but since they weren't mentioned in this thread, it would appear to the casual reader that there is nothing else to consider. I also don't want to turn this thread into an adoption debate, but it's sometimes hard not to respond.

Isn't it great that there are different options, and we can all choose the method of forming our families that suits us best?

Absolutely