Patients have some crazy requests sometime

When I was a student on the maternity ward I had a mom ask me to come to her house on the day of the Bris to take care of the baby.
 
Been a nurse for 21 years. Human nature is a funny thing. I have met patients who were the nicest, most gracious, most wonderful people you'd ever want to meet. I couldn't do enough for that type of person, because I knew that they sincerely appreciated the job I did.

I have also met patients who, the moment they enter the hospital, feel that the nurses job is to be their personal slave. I give those patients good care because it is my job. However, what many people do not understand is that a nurses duty is to always be working toward making the patient maximally independent. Putting their peri pad in place, wiping their nose, holding their tissue etc. for them, when they are capable of doing it themselves, does not meet this goal. That is sometimes difficult for patients and families to understand, no matter how many times it is explained. And of course, when Mom doesn't get better becaiuse Mom is laying in the bed like a slug expecting to be waited on hand and foot, the hospital gets sued for not "curing" her.

BTW, not everyone who is in the hospital these days is "very sick". Many patients know very well how to work the system, as do their family members. There is the famous "My elderly mother is complaining of abdominal pain(thus requiring a 3 day, million $ work up) and oh it happens to be New Year's Eve". Translation: "I want to go out and have no one to stay with Mom, so I'll let the hospital babysit her". Then there's always the prison inmates who mysteriously get "chest pain" when they go to jail, because it's much nicer to stay at the hospital in a private room than it is to be in jail.

As far as those of you who have had negative experiences, well...there are good and bad in every profession. I will apologize for all my colleagues who did not meet your expectations of what a nurse "should" do.

Disney Deluxe Princess, your posts do not indicate where you live. I can only hope it's not in Connecticut, as I doubt our encounter in the hospital would be a pleasant one.

Funny story #1:
Many years ago, when I was first a nurse, I was working a Sunday day shift. One of the patients under my care was a young transsexual male, who was midway through his change, so he had female anatomy on his upper body and male anatomy below the belt. He was also a transvestite. He had been admitted to the hospital for observation after having a fluted champagne glass removed from his rectum. They had to break it to get it out, and were worried that the glass may have sliced his colorectal area.I was probably about 23 years old at the time, and I entered this patient's room at 7AM on that Sunday morning to find him totally distraught at the fact that here it was, Sunday morning, and he still had his Saturday night make up on, which included purple glitter eyeshadow. The silver lining to the cloud...there was nothing else that could have happened that day that could have topped that, so I got the hard part over early!

Funny Story #2:
I was a student nurse, probably about 19 years old, doing an Ob-Gyn rotation, and was spending a day in the doctor's office. It had been relatively uneventful until the afternoon, when a woman came in, complaining of ******l pain. The doctor did a very thorough history, and got no information that could point to what could be causing the pain. Upon doing the ******l exam, he reached and pulled out A SET OF KEYS. He showed them to the woman, whose response was "Oh, that's where I left those".

Not-So-Funny-Story #3:
I was notified that I was getting a transfer of a patient who had been on another unit, and had a reputation of being less-than-willing to participate in her own recovery, with a family that supported her in this endeavor. Immediately upon her arrival into the room, her very vocal daughter looked at me and said "Oh, good, another nurse I can terrorize and make cry. I do so enjoy doing that". My reply, "Ma'am, I've been a nurse for 20 years. There's not much you can throw at me that I haven't already seen, and it's going to take a lot more than you have to offer to make me cry." That is a good example of the "poor terrified family members so worried about their sick relative".

I won't go into the stories of the drug-abusing boyfriend of the terminally ill HIV patient who came into the hospital with a gun to kill us all because we "let" his girlfriend die. BTW, she caught the virus from him.

Despite the Deluxe Disney Princesses of the world, who I daresay make my job harder than it needs to be, I have had an interesting and varied career, with experiences not offered by the average job. I have had the good fortune of helping people live,and the privelege of helping people die with dignity. I wouldn't trade it for the world.
 
I agree that it is supposed to be a funny thread about nursing and things that have happened. The ONLY reason I said to "walk a mile in our shoes" was to point out that this was obvious never the intent of the OP and some were being judgemental. Some posts were so critical that they were downright mean. On a Disney/family forum????? My original post was to be funny although it really happened and was never even intended to vent. I have my co-workers to vent to, I don't need this forum to do that! There are some very funny stories that happen over one's career and would have been funny to share. I would have to think that not one nurse ever set out to hurt someone's feelings or make fun. No one used any names and I don't even have a state listed so no one could "guess" where I was from. I know I can speak for myself that I was feeling attacked as a nurse and judged. There is no one harder on a nurse than a nurse while she/he is driving home going over their day checking off everything they did making sure they did it right. It is alot of responsiblity and needs respect. That being said now that I am in a new department I am proud to do what I do for a living and have the flexibility to continue to raise my family and work in what I believe, with all the challenges it brings.

Ok off the rant........

Here is another funny story:

I was once walking a lady to the bathroom. She had had a c-section and was now on her 3rd day. She was very slow moving, hunched over and moaning with each step. Everyone knows the stance, you don't want to straighten up because it will hurt and you walk guarded. This woman looked like she was going to fall over she was so hunched over and I felt sorry for her because she was in so much pain. I was telling her how important it was to move but equally important to keep up on her pain medicine, etc. etc. Anyways, after what seemed like forever we finally made it to the bathroom, turned on the light and suddenly she stood straight up, as straight as could be, hurried over to get under the bright light and exclaimed "oh I think my nail (fake) is broken and she would have to have the manicurist come in to fix it". With that she hunched back over, moaned and inched her way over to the toilet! I almost died from laughing. She had a miracle for a minute when she was worried about her nail and once she realized it wasn't really broken the miracle of feeling better was gone! You had to be there but it was truly funny!:teeth:
 
I'm not a nurse, I am a teacher who works with 7 year olds. I just wanted to say that I think nurses do a great job (one I could not do, although a good friend of mine is a ER nurse who says she could not do my job!). I understand that the origional post on this thread was for nurses to post funny stories and as a teacher whos profession on the discussion board has taken a lot of flaming thinks that the origional few posts were not meant to be mean or disrespectful but just humerous. I think that if people have a problem with this it should be a subject for the discussion board not here where people are supposed to be friendly. I have many funny stories of children or parents I could share but do not feel this is the place. However equally I do not think it is disrespectful if names and locations are not noted.
Over all I guess I just wanted to say I have the utter most respect for nurses, they are undervalued both in my country and in the USA. If they want to vent anger or funny stories please let them after all they are human just like you and me. Like one poster said, try to walk a day in their shoes, I know for certain I would not want to. :teacher:
Please do not flame me for this, if you feel the need to perhaps the discussion board would be the best place for this thread.
 

Although I've been hospitalized 3 times and had 2 surgeries, I've never been truly or chronically ill (intestinal infection, appendicitis, and gall bladder). I've had some nurses more attentive than others, but no truly bad ones. Hospitals are so understaffed and nurses so overworked that patients and families need to take the responsibility for non-medical care. Yes, it would have been nice for a nurse to give me a sponge-bath, but I was totally capable of doing it myself. I hauled my IV pole down the hall to get my own ice water. When my DH had two surgeries within 4 weeks this summer, I helped him bathe, shave etc. I did the same for my grandmother, my mom, and my dad in the last few years. I know that not all patients or families can do that, but those that can should. Nurses need to focus on medical care.
 
Thank you, Danauk and phillybeth, for your kind comments and perceptiveness. Now if more of the world was like you, how easy my job would be!!!!
 
I work as an ICU nurse and a patient of ours because of multiple medical issues was difficult to place on normal med/surg floor or subacute facilities. So she was with us for months.

One day, she had looked at herself in a mirror for the first time in months and saw a couple inches growth of grey hair at the roots (she dyed her hair auburn). She was distraught and asked if there was any way to get her to a hairdresser. (Mind you with all the ICU machinary). She told me she was serious and said "i just am not me anymore".

I found the correct dye and did an ICU spa day. There was a cut, curlers, auburn dye, nailpolish, a shaved leg or two.


As good as it made her feel, all the nurses that took part were equally touched.
 
Let's be honest.....these stories are much better than the post I could start......Funny Stories Accountants Have From The Workplace! That would be a dead thread from the beginning!

Thanks for all that you nurses do. I think that if I ever have to go to the hospital for a stay, I'll just check the box on my paperwork where you request the 'good nurses only'! ;)
 
Thank you nurses for all the hard work you do. I've got a funny story of me being a bad patient. :o

I had to have surgery on my rear-end (I had a pilonidal cyst removed from right over my tailbone), which was already pretty embarrassing. The week before this surgery I had my wisdom teeth removed, so the dentist put me on steroids to help prevent swelling. Let's just say that the steroids made me pretty crazy! I would jump 10 feet when I heard a door shut, I couldn't sleep because they made me so hyper, etc. So I get to the surgery prep area where the nurses are getting me ready for surgery. Before it was time for my epidural, they came in to give me some sedatives. Well, it took 3 shots to get me remotely calmed down (and I'm a small girl), LOL! I bet they had never seen someone so small need so much sedative. Well, the third shot of sedative finally worked, but then I just panicked more. I had a bizarre fear of throwing up, so I just kept begging every nurse I saw (it was probably the same nurse over and over, but I don't remember since I was only half with it) that I would do anything for them if they just didn't let me throw up. I even offered to make them cookies! I'll bet they just couldn't get enough of me! Sadly I was too humiliated to bring them cookies later on. I should've just swallowed my pride, and taken them some after they had to put up with steroid crazy, three sedative shot needing, me! :teeth:
 
Originally posted by Disney Doll
[
Disney Deluxe Princess, your posts do not indicate where you live. I can only hope it's not in Connecticut, as I doubt our encounter in the hospital would be a pleasant one.


Despite the Deluxe Disney Princesses of the world, who I daresay make my job harder than it needs to be, I have had an interesting and varied career, with experiences not offered by the average job. I have had the good fortune of helping people live,and the privelege of helping people die with dignity. I wouldn't trade it for the world. [/COLOR]

Oh, thanks for bashing me personally. Your compassion shines through.:rolleyes: And what does your first comment to me mean?
 
Well, I don't remember any idiotic requests off the bat, but I do remember an idiotic question. We had a patient in the ER that had overdosed, and she was pierced everywhere. Her boyfriend/piercer, was pacing around the ER with no shirt on, and it was in March, and had his nipples pierced. He asked one of the very mom-like ER nurses if she would like to see his other piercing (below the belt)!:eek: She calmly stated, "no thanks, I'll take your word for it". I was a very new nurse then, and totally shocked. I have lots of other, very funny, ER stories, but unfortunately can't entertain you with them here, as it is a family board. :D
 
It's me, the OP. Just a few comments. I never called my patients idiots. I asked what were the most crazy requests. There is a difference. Second, I am not sorry for asking the questions, as one person said that I surely was. It was meant to be light-hearted in nature. Third, Disney Deluxe Princess, my comments defending celebs have always been that people make assumptions and judgments about celebs yet have never even met them. I can tell my "crazy request" story because I was actually there when it happened. To all other professions, you are free to post your own thread (Teachers-craziest things students say. Accountants-craziest things people try to deduct on their taxes. Ministers-most outrageous weddings requests, etc.) We all know that there are good and bad in every profession (even politics :eek: ) That wasn't the point of the thread. But, like I originally said, I was addressing nurses in particular.
 
Originally posted by goodstarr
, Disney Deluxe Princess, my comments defending celebs have always been that people make assumptions and judgments about celebs yet have never even met them.

Well, I do have experiences with nurses--wonderful and horrible. Hopefully, you will have great health all of your life and never have to rely on the kindness of a nurse.
 
I practically had to sit on my hands in order to not respond this time, and as you see, it didn't work! goodstarr, us fellow nurses all understand the intent of your original post.:D We all know why there is a major nursing shortage, as we deal with the same types of people daily who feel the need to make their sarcastic comments here. goodstarr, let's all make a pact not to respond to these people on this thread who are goading for a fight. Let the funny stories keep coming.:D
 
Originally posted by goodstarr
It's me, the OP. Just a few comments. I never called my patients idiots. I asked what were the most idiotic requests. There is a difference. Second, I am not sorry for asking the questions, as one person said that I surely was. It was meant to be light-hearted in nature. Third, Disney Deluxe Princess, my comments defending celebs have always been that people make assumptions and judgments about celebs yet have never even met them. I can tell my "idiotic request" story because I was actually there when it happened. To all other professions, you are free to post your own thread (Teachers-craziest things students say. Accountants-stupidest things people try to deduct on their taxes. Ministers-most outrageous weddings requests, etc.) We all know that there are good and bad in every profession (even politics :eek: ) That wasn't the point of the thread. But, like I originally said, I was addressing nurses in particular. (It's a Nurse Thing-you wouldn't understand)

I assume you meant me with what I said. I think I said:

[color=FF0000]I think the OP was just trying to share some fun and silly things that have happened in our line of work. You may be offended by idiotic word, and I am sure that the OP never meant to offend people. I don't think that this thread was supposed to be 'Lets bash nurses", either. [/color]

If it was me I said I did not think you never meant to offend people. I did not apologize for you, if this was me. I also apologize in advance if I read into your statement and assumed too much.
******************

I do believe most nurses treat people with respect. We also treat people with empathy, sympathy, compassion, and kindness. (you do not know how many times I have cried over a complete stranger I have taken care of in the OR when things did not go well) We are also hosed down with a lot of, what I think is, unnecessary paperwork. Charting takes so much out of what we went into nursing for the first place.

What I have read in this thread against nurses is from bad experiences people have had while a loved one is hospitalized and therefore, anger is expressed to the wrong individuals. This thread was supposed to be light-hearted and funny not, as I have said before "Let's bash nurses". I have been through terrible medical care for two solid months for my dear FIL. I took our my anger in the correct venue by sending lengthly letters to the proper authorities including our state representatives. Legally, we do not have any recourse since FIL passed away, but we are doing what we can. Yours may not need to go that far, but a letter to the CEO could be effective. This should not have turned into my "medical care from h**l" thread.

I appreciate all the "lay people's" posts of the silly things they have done. I really laughed out loud about the pushing the pump button a ton of times for pain relief. I did not appreciate all of them, though.

Hi, MeanLaureen, I know you are around!!!!!!!!!!
 
LOL at your earlier joke to me MeanLaureen :)


I think we need a thread about horrible customers! EVERYONE is a customer! Yeah! Yeah! :) Hehehehe :)
 
I'm not a nurse, but I understand the intent of the post too. I also don't see anything wrong with venting --- goodness knows I vent about my job all the time!

I've had a lot of experience with hospitals and doctors and nurses - both of my parents died young after prolonged illnesses. I have to say it was NEVER the nurses I had a problem with. Doctors, yes. Nurses, never. I found some of them to be the most compassionate people I have ever known and credit them with helping me cope with the many emotions I felt about watching my parent die. My hat is off to nurses, nurses aids, orderlies, technicians -- healthcare at that level is really a noble profession.
 
Originally posted by TeresaNJ
I practically had to sit on my hands in order to not respond this time, and as you see, it didn't work! goodstarr, us fellow nurses all understand the intent of your original post.:D We all know why there is a major nursing shortage, as we deal with the same types of people daily who feel the need to make their sarcastic comments here. goodstarr, let's all make a pact not to respond to these people on this thread who are goading for a fight. Let the funny stories keep coming.:D

You answered while I was answering. I should have waited until you were done and I may not have posted. LOL

Another story:

I work in the OR in a trauma center. One Sunday morning, we were getting a gun shot victim by the name of Bambi over from the ER. Bambi got in a scuffle Saturday night. (by the way, I made up that name, thought a Disney name would be funny!) Bambi still had all her makeup on and fingernails looked great. I was shocked when I went to put a catheter into Bambi (no one told me, okay?) and Bambi was really Thumper! Bambi was in the middle of a change and was only half way through. Top half only done. Everyone laughed at my reaction!
 
I think everyone here agrees that nursing is a very hard, stressful, mostly thankless job. People who recently had sick loved ones in the hospital are probably going to be a bit sensitive about the subject matter. Disney Deluxe and the others who have had problems in the hospital, I can understand your feelings.

Sure, nurses need to laugh and vent. We all do. MeanLaureen gave some good advice when she requested the idiotic stories not be about the patients themselves or what they need help with.

I admire nurses. I know I could never do that job.:D
 














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