Parents of teens - their haircuts

[ckay87]

To what extent (if at all) do you dictate how your teen styles his/her hair?

I ask my DS (15) to be clean and presentable. No tatoos, no piercings, no crazy hair coloring. But the kid likes to get a mohawk in the summer and each time my DH wants to "forbid" it. Now, it's not my choice of hairstyles for him at all - in fact, I pretty much dislike it, personally. But it's just hair. It's his hair. It grows...very quickly in his case. You have to let a kid express himself somehow. Some ways can be inappropriate or damaging (such as tatoos, certain clothing, or ear guages), but some are just harmless. I think hairdos are, for the most part, harmless.

What do you think? Do you have a kid with a crazy hairstyle? Do you dictate what they can and can't do with their hair? Where do you draw the line?

 

[Cantw8]

I've never fought with my kids over hair or piercings...those aren't the battles I want to fight, I need to save my threats and bullying for the top dollar items

 

[denisenh]

It is difficult. Adults know that appearances matter and your DS will be judged by others based on his.

But the more problems a child has..drugs, drinking etc, the more glad you'll be that his only "problem" is a weird haircut.

 

[DoeWDW]

I reminded my kids that their choice of hairstyle may impact how other people treat them. Right or wrong, it's a fact of life. Once they were old enough to want jobs, we told them that a wild hairstyle may lead to them NOT getting the job they want, so they pretty much decided to have conservative hair.

 

[taylor4fam]

I don't really dictate how he wears his hair.

He went to his first dance (13) and he did let me cut the hair out of his eyes. He wears it kind of angled in front and we call him cyclops because we can usually only see one eye.

 

[sunlver]

My son will be 14 in in August. He is by no means a trend setter . With that being said, I do not like long hair on boys. I do not care if it is the style, the latest craze or whatever, I do not like long hair on little boys or big boys. This is just my opinion. Since I still pay for his haircuts,he gets it cut the way I want . Basically he gets a boys cut, which is not long hair, and not a crew cut, some where in between. When his hair starts touching his ears, its time for another trim.
I think boy teenager and otherwsie, look better with hair that doesnt look like they just rolled out of bed. I see the boys by my sons school, and so many have the long messy hair, it makes me crazy.

 

[TEENEE]

My ds wanted to let his hair grow. Last year he looked really bad, long straggly hair. After awhile he got tired of it had it cut really short. If I had given him a hard time about it he probably would have kept it long for a longer time. When his hair was long he was trying to find a job. I don't know how many applications he put in but he never even got a phone call. As soon as he cut his hair he got a job. He learned a life lesson without any drama from mom.

 

[Angelhalo]

I love long hair on boys. Love the new shaggy hair trend that has come back into style. I hope it sticks around long enough for mine to have it someday without being total dorks!

 

[ckay87]

My son had that long, bushy, messy hair too, so when he talked about wanting the mohawk, my response was "YES!" It is so nice to see his face and ears again.

I, too, always stress about how appearance impacts the way people judge you. I outright told him that when people see a teenager walking around the neighborhood with a mohawk or something like it, they are just watching and waiting for that kid to make trouble. So he needs to be super careful about the way he acts.

Next year or so when he tries for a job, he'll have to tone it down and I think he'll understand that. If he wants to be a goof now, though, whatever.

 

[Nikel1979]

Not a parent to teenagers yet, but I won't have any hair rules other than the only one I had. If they get something done and don't like it, either they live with it or pay to get it fixed themselves. That was my mom's rule when I was a teen. I experimented with my hair, stil do actually.

I prefer to reserve my battles for the really important things, such as safety issues. In the grand scheme of things, hair color/style just really doesn't matter.

 

[NMAmy]

I prefer to reserve my battles for the really important things, such as safety issues. In the grand scheme of things, hair color/style just really doesn't matter.

Yep, I totally agree. DD is 17 and I haven't given any input on hair style/color in many years. When she was about 13, she had REALLY long hair and had had it for years. She told me she wanted to get it really short--like a pixie almost. I merely told her that she might want to consider just getting it cut to her shoulders so it wouldn't be so much of a shock to her. She did end up doing that and was grateful that I had recommended doing it more gradually. She actually hasn't gone much shorter than that in all these years.

 

[CathrynRose]

My hair rule is: it has to be clean.

Beyond that, being the mom of two teenagers - hair is the very least of my worries.

Both have long hair.

 

[KelNottAt]

I pretty much let my kids do anything they want as long as it's temporary. Haircuts are temporary. I even consider piercings temporary.

If they want to make a permanent change to their apperance (tattoo comes to mind, but there are others) we have to discuss it first. And I'll probably discourage/forbid it.

 

[Planogirl]

I don't dictate how DS has his hair cut or what he wears, within reason of course. Nothing obscene or permanent is allowed but everything else is fine.

I don't mind long hair though. Long hair can look nice if it's taken care of IMO. Funny thing is that DS chooses to keep his hair cut short and wear "regular" clothes.

 

[MoniqueU]

I guess I am the odd duck. We are pretty conservative. Our girls must have their hair past their shoulders. Dh would prefer it longer and my oldest dear daughter just meets his requirement. My son all the way til last year just had a standard every day haircut. Football had them get buzz cuts which I had never allowed before. Now it has kind of grown with me, it is not super short but looks good on him. No loncg hair for him ever and he must be clean shaven. This is the rule of the football coach as well, if he can see your hair out of your helmet you won't play. We are in full support of that. One of my daughters has her ears pierced the other let hers close. We didn't peice them as babies and no gold jewelry on them either. I would flip out if one of my kids ever got a tatoo or a weird piercing or dyed their hair a strange color. This is a battle I am willing to fight. I don't go for grunge or rebel type looks and i believe others view this in a bad light. Maybe not everyone but enough.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

No tats, no piercings except for ears, I have girls.

Hair, I do not dictate, except for the clean rule. And yes, that is important.

 

[ckay87]

I'm pretty open minded, but I can't for the life of me understand the relevance of the length of a girls hair. I even took some time to think about this and can't wrap my mind around it. Some of the most conservative women I know have short hair. Plus, I think a little girl with shorter hair is soooo adorable. And they look so comfortable and athletic too. I can respect your opinion and it makes no difference to me. I'm just kinda baffled (coming from the mom of a son with a mohawk )

 

[powellrj]

I usually don't care how they wear their hair as long as it is clean.

DS had really long hair for a long time, he wanted the guitar player look, but he had to get it cut for show choir. I have to admit, I liked it long.

DD I never said anything until last weekend. She bought spray hair color and put pink streaks in it. She knows because she has white blond hair that it will stain her hair, but "she forgot". Her DB is getting married in 2 weeks and she has pink streaks in her hair. We are washing it twice a day hoping it will be gone. It is lighter, but you can still see it. Normally I wouldn't care, but since these are forever pictures, I wanted them to be nice.

I guess she will match the ring bearer whose mother cut his hair in a mohawk and dyed the top colts blue.

 

[Angelhalo]

I guess I am the odd duck. We are pretty conservative. Our girls must have their hair past their shoulders. Dh would prefer it longer and my oldest dear daughter just meets his requirement. My son all the way til last year just had a standard every day haircut. Football had them get buzz cuts which I had never allowed before. Now it has kind of grown with me, it is not super short but looks good on him. No loncg hair for him ever and he must be clean shaven. This is the rule of the football coach as well, if he can see your hair out of your helmet you won't play. We are in full support of that. One of my daughters has her ears pierced the other let hers close. We didn't peice them as babies and no gold jewelry on them either. I would flip out if one of my kids ever got a tatoo or a weird piercing or dyed their hair a strange color. This is a battle I am willing to fight. I don't go for grunge or rebel type looks and i believe others view this in a bad light. Maybe not everyone but enough.

 

[Angelhalo]

I'm pretty open minded, but I can't for the life of me understand the relevance of the length of a girls hair. I even took some time to think about this and can't wrap my mind around it. Some of the most conservative women I know have short hair. Plus, I think a little girl with shorter hair is soooo adorable. And they look so comfortable and athletic too. I can respect your opinion and it makes no difference to me. I'm just kinda baffled (coming from the mom of a son with a mohawk )

Makes no sense to me either. Thank Goodness my mom only required us to have clean hair when I was little. I lopped all of mine off in 4th grade. Had a very short cut and I LOVED it!! My mom was just happy knowing that I had the hairstyle that I personally wanted. After all, even in 4th grade, it was still my head, and I had to brush it and style it each day. As for my dad, he couldn't have possibly cared less what I did with my hair. I could have shaved it all off and he would have just assumed it was a trend or something. LOL!!!