Parents of College Class of 2018 (A.K.A., "Is this the line to the poor house?")

[Bluestars]

I'm sorry it's been so rough for your son! Two of my friends and many acquaintances have kids at A&M since I'm in Texas but I only know one who's son is in the Corps so I don't know much about that experience. One friend posted pics this morning of the weekends first formation and I thought of your son. Why did he want to join the Corps? Is he thinking military after college.

A&M is a unique school and experience. Hopefully he will begin to experience the better parts now.

I saw those pictures on Facebook of the Corps. They are great. Also, they have a few youtube videos posted. The ceremony this past weekend with all of the new fish was wonderful. Over 800 of them!

His plan was to do ROTC in college and then become an officer in the Army when he graduates. He was thinking of going into special forces. He got a national four year Army scholarship and chose to use it at Texas A&M. He spend the night with the cadets last year and loved it. This year, he nailed his physical test and did extremely well. But the cadet orientation (hell) week was not what he expected. Nor are the daily expectations of the cadets. Still, it's early in the year and all he has experienced is the worst. Surely it gets better or there would be no cadets.

I talked to him today and he said his classes were fine. He still feels the same about the cadet program though. I told him to hang in there. That's pretty much all I can do, but it made me sad to know that he is feeling this way. He's usually such a confident and happy kid. It's just hard on a mom.

 

[sk!mom]

Hugs to you! Not much is harder than seeing our kids struggling.

 

[IDoDis]

It sounds like all of the kids are settling in, some having an easier transition than others. My son just went through 10 days of a cadet hell week. We visited him this weekend. It was the worst 10 days of his life. I am sure the next few weeks will be much better and he will be happy again. What a difficult way for these boys to start off the year. I cried for the first time since he left. I was able to keep from crying all of this time because I was so happy that he would have wonderful experiences, but that hasn't been the case yet. I am sure it will get better because nothing will be worse than those 10 days. We will be visiting him again in 6 weeks and I hope that I see my old son back.

I'm sorry to hear how rough it's been for your DS! I imagine that this "boot camp" is designed to make the cadets' lives living hell for the first several weeks. I'm sure it's hard knowing that your DS is not happy. The other new cadets are probably miserable, too! Hopefully things will be going better by your next visit. ((((Hugs))))

 

[njmom47]

I'm sorry to hear how rough it's been for your DS! I imagine that this "boot camp" is designed to make the cadets' lives living hell for the first several weeks. I'm sure it's hard knowing that your DS is not happy. The other new cadets are probably miserable, too! Hopefully things will be going better by your next visit. ((((Hugs))))

for any of our kids that are going through tough times!
DS was recruited to play baseball, and he said so far the coaches are reaaaaallly tough, as well as the players from last year. The recruits are all sticking together though.
I told ds that's how they weed out the weak, and of course that the returning players are being jerks...you guys are the ones that could be taking their spots on the team!! There's over 50 kids trying out for 35 spots. There's 25 pitchers trying out (which ds is one) but not sure how many spots will be on the teams (they actually have a JV and a Varsity; JV plays about once a week and does go to Florida in the Spring). I'm hoping his chances are decent. And if that doesn't work, he is an excellent outfielder and can swing a bat.

 

[BriarfoxinWA]

I am not a parent, but I thought I'd chime in anyways... What it seems to me is that college has become way, way too expensive. It's terrible for students to graduate with 20k in debt on average and spend 10 years paying it off. This generation has actually not improved economically than their parents, that's how bad it is.

So my advice for going to college is try to minimize costs as much as possible. Student debt is bad to have.

Anyway, sorry to rain on the parade, college can also be awesome and a lot of fun!

I totally agree! My older DS was able to go to a 4 year college and we paid it all out of pocket. He graduated on time and got a job in his field. Had we not paid for it he'd be faced with a $50,000+ student loan that he'd have to pay while working with a $40,000/year job. My younger DS graduated in June and started at the local community college this summer. He's doing a 2 year program for Software/programming. The cost will be much less but his earnings potential could be much greater than his brother. IMHO 4 year colleges are overrated.

 

[elgerber]

Boy, today feels so weird. My Facebook feed is totally flooded with first day pictures, but this is the first time in 16 years I haven't had a kid starting school today. I will say it was nice last night not to be stressing over getting them ready for today, but today it makes me sad.

 

[disneymom2one]

I totally agree! My older DS was able to go to a 4 year college and we paid it all out of pocket. He graduated on time and got a job in his field. Had we not paid for it he'd be faced with a $50,000+ student loan that he'd have to pay while working with a $40,000/year job. My younger DS graduated in June and started at the local community college this summer. He's doing a 2 year program for Software/programming. The cost will be much less but his earnings potential could be much greater than his brother. IMHO 4 year colleges are overrated.

I teach at a (primarily) two year college. Love my job. Love what we do for students (most do go on to four year schools). That being said, I'm happily sending and paying for my daughter to attend a four year school although the cost is significantly more (twice as much tuition and the added expenses of room and board). There's nothing overrated about her four year school. It's a medium size regional state university and it's absolutely where she belongs (in spite of some bumps - to be expected). I love where I teach (and my daughter dual enrolled here as a senior in a high school) but it wasn't where she needed to be this year.

I also want to add that this thread has been an incredible source of support for me. Sending her to school has been the hardest thing I've ever done. Reading the posts of those in a similar position has made the last couple of weeks bearable. Being as delicate as I possibly can, I hope the thread continues to be a support for those of us going through this and not a debate about the merits of different forms of higher education. They all have their place.

 

[Pembo]

I teach at a (primarily) two year college. Love my job. Love what we do for students (most do go on to four year schools). That being said, I'm happily sending and paying for my daughter to attend a four year school although the cost is significantly more (twice as much tuition and the added expenses of room and board). There's nothing overrated about her four year school. It's a medium size regional state university and it's absolutely where she belongs (in spite of some bumps - to be expected). I love where I teach (and my daughter dual enrolled here as a senior in a high school) but it wasn't where she needed to be this year.

I also want to add that this thread has been an incredible source of support for me. Sending her to school has been the hardest thing I've ever done. Reading the posts of those in a similar position has made the last couple of weeks bearable. Being as delicate as I possibly can, I hope the thread continues to be a support for those of us going through this and not a debate about the merits of different forms of higher education. They all have their place.

I agree with this completely!

Hugs to those with kids that are struggling.

 

[Gina]

I talked to him today and he said his classes were fine. He still feels the same about the cadet program though. I told him to hang in there. That's pretty much all I can do, but it made me sad to know that he is feeling this way. He's usually such a confident and happy kid. It's just hard on a mom.

I hope he can hang in there.. :-( Hell Week is appropriately named!! And Freshman year as a whole in the Corps isn't exactly a cake walk. But I hope he can talk to enough upperclassmen to be able to see the big picture... and at A&M, the hell the cadets experience the first year or so is directly proportional to the glory and swagger they assume the last two years. The contrast makes it all the better and sweeter. My brother kept a picture of the Senior boots in his wallet, as a symbol of what waited for him. And if nothing else, he could also transfer to Galveston -- the Corps is much smaller there, and a tad less... you know, Corps-y.

I also want to add that this thread has been an incredible source of support for me. Sending her to school has been the hardest thing I've ever done. Reading the posts of those in a similar position has made the last couple of weeks bearable. Being as delicate as I possibly can, I hope the thread continues to be a support for those of us going through this and not a debate about the merits of different forms of higher education. They all have their place.

This thread is specifically for parents of kids who just started college -- period. The title of the thread says it all. I have no problem being indelicate, and will do whatever it takes to keep this thread the supportive, empathetic place it has been all this time. The debate over student debt is for outside our group hug bubble here. The end.

Back on topic... We went to see my son on Sunday, and it was kind of like ripping the bandaid off all over again, lol. I was so happy to see him, but then sad again at driving away. But I'm happy to see him so happy. His first day of class was yesterday, and he said it was "kinda boring," because they only went over syllabi. I told him I would remind him of his words when he was *wishing* it was back to boring!! Lol But he is so excited about classes finally starting, he was up and on time for his *8 o'clock class* this morning. Y'all have NO idea what a minor miracle that is... This is the kid who has 3 alarm clocks and whose bed you have to set on fire to get him up before the crack of noon.

Bluestars -- He gets to go to his first game at Kyle Field this weekend. I've never gotten to take him before, tickets are just so dang expensive!! I'm SO excited for him!!


Big hugs to everyone!!

 

[elgerber]

This thread is specifically for parents of kids who just started college -- period. The title of the thread says it all. I have no problem being indelicate, and will do whatever it takes to keep this thread the supportive, empathetic place it has been all this time. The debate over student debt is for outside our group hug bubble here. The end.

Big hugs to everyone!!

Thank you!

 

[sk!mom]

DD did not come home and I missed her mightily but we enjoyed the weekend.

We joked that we did really well- Shopped Dillard's Labor Day sale and came away with sheets for DD's bed, used a couple of discount codes and ordered DD a couple of Christmas gifts, and DH worked on a dorm room project for us to take Parent's weekend. But yeah, we hardly thought of her at all.

She texted today that she isn't feeling well but had already scheduled an appointment at the Campus clinic. So good for her. She's looking forward to the first home game on Saturday.

 

[PlutoPony]

Having been through this last year, the next thing some of you might hear is "i wanna change my major/add a 2nd major/add a minor,etc.". As they get into their classes, many of them obviously aren't what they expected. And it's not just that they're easier or harder, but frankly a lot of intro classes are boring (calling a spade a spade). Or they fall in love with one class/prof. You get the idea. Think this whole thing started around a month in for my son and his friends. YMMV obviously.

Thank goodness my son's school only lets them change their major 3 times....

Good luck everyone!

 

[Bluestars]

I hope he can hang in there.. :-( Hell Week is appropriately named!! And Freshman year as a whole in the Corps isn't exactly a cake walk. But I hope he can talk to enough upperclassmen to be able to see the big picture... and at A&M, the hell the cadets experience the first year or so is directly proportional to the glory and swagger they assume the last two years. The contrast makes it all the better and sweeter. My brother kept a picture of the Senior boots in his wallet, as a symbol of what waited for him. And if nothing else, he could also transfer to Galveston -- the Corps is much smaller there, and a tad less... you know, Corps-y.


Back on topic... We went to see my son on Sunday, and it was kind of like ripping the bandaid off all over again, lol. I was so happy to see him, but then sad again at driving away. But I'm happy to see him so happy. His first day of class was yesterday, and he said it was "kinda boring," because they only went over syllabi. I told him I would remind him of his words when he was *wishing* it was back to boring!! Lol But he is so excited about classes finally starting, he was up and on time for his *8 o'clock class* this morning. Y'all have NO idea what a minor miracle that is... This is the kid who has 3 alarm clocks and whose bed you have to set on fire to get him up before the crack of noon.

Bluestars -- He gets to go to his first game at Kyle Field this weekend. I've never gotten to take him before, tickets are just so dang expensive!! I'm SO excited for him!!


Big hugs to everyone!!

That's cool about your brother keeping a picture of the boots in his wallet! When my son toured the school last year and found out what the boots meant, he said, "I want to earn those boots." LOL He sounded better today. I think it was all just kind of overwhelming to move 10 hours away, go through a 10 day "hell week" and then start classes. That would have overwhelmed me too.

I'll bet your son is excited about the game! My husband and I have tickets to go to a game in October and they were very expensive. I think there is a some kind of BBQ on Saturday.

 

[Bluestars]

Boy, today feels so weird. My Facebook feed is totally flooded with first day pictures, but this is the first time in 16 years I haven't had a kid starting school today. I will say it was nice last night not to be stressing over getting them ready for today, but today it makes me sad.

It feels weird to me too. Some moments it's nice not to be stressed and other moments I think of him everywhere I look in my house. I think of making his meals, him watching TV with us, even the college stuff that piled up in the den as we were making purchases. My husband is having a tough time too. I am sure it gets easier as we get used to it.

It sounds like everyone kids are adjusting. I wonder if the first semester of college will go by as quickly as their senior year. That flew by.

 

[Bluestars]

I'm sorry to hear how rough it's been for your DS! I imagine that this "boot camp" is designed to make the cadets' lives living hell for the first several weeks. I'm sure it's hard knowing that your DS is not happy. The other new cadets are probably miserable, too! Hopefully things will be going better by your next visit. ((((Hugs))))

Thanks.

 

[IDoDis]

Having been through this last year, the next thing some of you might hear is "i wanna change my major/add a 2nd major/add a minor,etc.". As they get into their classes, many of them obviously aren't what they expected. And it's not just that they're easier or harder, but frankly a lot of intro classes are boring (calling a spade a spade). Or they fall in love with one class/prof. You get the idea. Think this whole thing started around a month in for my son and his friends. YMMV obviously. Thank goodness my son's school only lets them change their major 3 times.... Good luck everyone!

Yep, this already happened with DD's minor which was Spanish. She tested into a higher level Spanish class, so the test must have been poorly designed. DD was able to decipher out enough Spanish words and phrases to be able to find the correct answers in an multiple choice format where the answer choices were in English. I remember when she took the placement test online she brought up the possibility of her testing in at a level too difficult for her knowledge base, and that's what happened. After her first class where she was completely lost, she switched to a lower level Spanish class and promptly decided that she no longer wanted to minor in Spanish. She also found out that any Spanish class under the 300 level didn't count towards a minor which meant she'd have to take a few Spanish classes that wouldn't count towards her minor. She's not sure what to minor in now, but hinted that maybe it would be Psychology which could be a huge benefit since the MCAT exam is changing starting this spring where a portion of the exam has to do with psychology and sociology.

I don't recall an employer ever asking/caring what my minor was. I told her to choose something she liked and not to stress over it.

 

[Jeafl]

I've only posted a few times on this thread, but I have been following most of it.

This fall is bittersweet for me, since my youngest just started college and we are now empty nesters. My daughter is kind of shy and quiet whenever she meets new people, and she and her roommate barely spoke the day they arrived. I was concerned that my daughter wouldn't put herself out there, so to speak.

Well, yesterday I saw a photo on her Facebook page that her roommate posted. It showed the two of them with huge smiles and the caption "new best friends! ".

I was thrilled to see that! It made my day!

 

[elgerber]

I've only posted a few times on this thread, but I have been following most of it.

This fall is bittersweet for me, since my youngest just started college and we are now empty nesters. My daughter is kind of shy and quiet whenever she meets new people, and she and her roommate barely spoke the day they arrived. I was concerned that my daughter wouldn't put herself out there, so to speak.

Well, yesterday I saw a photo on her Facebook page that her roommate posted. It showed the two of them with huge smiles and the caption "new best friends! ".

I was thrilled to see that! It made my day!

That's wonderful, I can imagine how that lifted a big weight off your shoulders!!!
I finally saw a pic of my dd yesterday, and my first thought is wth is she doing with her hair LOL!

 

[madge]

She texted today that she isn't feeling well but had already scheduled an appointment at the Campus clinic. So good for her. She's looking forward to the first home game on Saturday.

I think there's a lot of that going on at colleges across the country. DS said several kids he knew had "something" ... the new living arrangements, sleep schedules, stress, etc. are hard on kids. (adults, too. LOL) I packed a mini first aid kit for the dorm room, hoping he won't need it .. but I know he will. LOL

 

[elgerber]

I think there's a lot of that going on at colleges across the country. DS said several kids he knew had "something" ... the new living arrangements, sleep schedules, stress, etc. are hard on kids. (adults, too. LOL) I packed a mini first aid kit for the dorm room, hoping he won't need it .. but I know he will. LOL

Knock on wood, I haven't had that text/call yet either!

Madge, are you not on the October rental thread this year??