Parents of 12 y/o DD's (sleepovers)? (LONG)

[MAC3]

Hi Everyone,

I just had to find out if this only happens in my house? My DD had a sleepover last night. Usually I don't care too much what her room looks like, but I had a new girl coming over and another who comes from a pin neat family.

So all week long I've been cleaning the upstairs (downstairs is usually clean enough) in preparation for this. I bought her new sheets/pillowcases and washed everything in her room including the sleeping bag the other girls would have to use (except for the carpet)!

I let them have picky munchie stuff in her room but now it's all over the floor. I kinda expected that. Although I thought maybe a 12 y/o would pick up something they dropped. Nope stomped it right into the carpet.

But what floors me (my DD has our old water bed) they pull all the sheets out on the bed??? Got chalk dust all over the newly washed sleeping bag.

I would have never done that at a friends house. Can I be getting so old that I am amazed that they totally desecrated my daughters bedroom overnight? Or do I need to lighten up?

I feel like I have a right to be upset but then the little mother on my shoulder says "Get over it and let them have fun" Help I need opinions from others whos DD or DS have sleep overs often! Is this normal at your house?

Thanks (sorry about the rant!)
Lisa

 

[holycow]

I don't mind the normal mess you know toys around or clothing but when food is left laying around and sheets off...I would have said...Ok, no more fun until this is cleaned up! and handed them the vaccum....I don't think your going over board I just think some kids really don't have respect for others homes.

We've had carpets ruined cause of messy boys! ugh!

Holycow

 

[shortbun]

I, too, would have nicely but firmly had them clean up.
12 is old enough to be that responsible for having some fun.

 

[disneyjunkie]

My son is 12. When he has friends over it's up to him to have them help clean up before they leave. He doesn't get them to help, then he has to do it himself.

 

[BrerMom]

It must be the age. When DD and her friend were either just 12 or almost 12, they trashed DD's room. EVERYTHING was in the middle of the floor. The normal stuff I didn't have a problem with. One or both of them had taken every drawer and dumped the contents on the floor. When the mom showed up early and I asked the daughter to help clean up before she left, mom was insulted. Had the audacity to say that DD's room was messy when her DD got there! Don't know how she would have known since she went upstairs, but her daughter told her that and "my daughter has never lied to me in her life." Yeah, and you're Mother Teresa.

I think kids are kids regardless of the age. They'll usually only clean up exactly what they're told to clean up. I'm convinced my son and his friends don't even see any messes.

 

[MAC3]

Thanks for your responses. I know at this age I am supposed to pick my battles. So I have been trying to look the other way.

It's just nice to know I'm not on "Lisa Island" with this one. I consider 12 to be old enough to clean up after oneself.

Lisa