P.O.T.C. On Stranger Rides! The Missing Chapter,,Final Thoughts,, Preview Thoughts.

[laura74]

Great chapter!

Kinda funny about the seat belts, I remember back in '92
on our first trip down with the kids, they only had to put the belts on
when we went through a city.
How times and thoughts have changed.

I remember the good old days when we kids would just roll around the back of the station wagon like weebles.

And I pulled it off without Smidgy knowing about it, hey, she doesn't come and tell me
every time she has a drink.
Always important to justify it when you do something you
don't want your partner to know, but I pulled it off! I mentally patted myself on the back.

"Hope you feel better soon."

I let go one more time.

"If you don't put your hands back on the wheel I'm going to get out at
the next rest area and hitch a ride to Disney on the first Harley that comes along!"

Scared the crap out of me!

Smidgy is too much!

Finally, he came back with his breakfast.

On his plate was one of those little cereal boxes of Sugar Pops.

And an apple.

That's it.

This is why we're not doing the dining plan next trip. Our daughter is going to be 10 and no way does she eat like a Disney "adult."

Slowing down, I pulled up to the toll booth and a large, serious looking woman leaned out of the opening with her hand out.

"Yes, I'd like two Big Macs and two small fries, nothing to drink."

She just stared a hole right through me and I quickly handed over the money and took off.

I glanced at Smidgy and she's doing that squeeze the eyes shut as tight as you can thing
and shaking her head back and forth.

"What, did you want a quarter pounder instead?"

Funny! Sounds like something my dad would do.

Can't wait for more!

 

[pkondz]

Down through southern Georgia the Santa Fe rumbles, and I do mean rumbles.

A good mechanic would tell you that it's 'rumbly in its tumbly'. Good in that he likes Disney, he may bite as a car fixer upper. Bring on the car care center!

Diane asked if I minded if she took a little nap and I told her to go for it, no map reading, sign reading necessary for the next few hundred miles.

What is it with women and car napping? Pre rug rats, DW and I decided to drive to Toronto to visit my sister... and see the sights of TO. We also decided to drive the longer way through Canada to see the fall colours (about 1300 miles/2000 kms... same as through the States but single lane/slower speed limits). We left early in the day and within 20 minutes, DW was out like a light. She woke up 5 times. Once for lunch, once when we got to our hotel and the other three went like this:
Me, "Oh, honey, look! Beautiful!" (Referring to the scenery)
DW, "Huh? Whazza? What? Oh? Yeah, nice." (As her head slowly spirals up from deep sleep position to looking out passenger door)
Me, "Uh, no honey... not over there, over there." (Points in totally opposite direction of whatever boring thing she may have seen through bleary eyes in wrong direction.)
DW, "Oh, okay, nicezzzzzzzz."

After checking in to the hotel and having dinner, she'd be asleep by 8 or 9 and sleep 'til 7 -8 next morning.

Repeat all above two more times.


Only later did we find out that her thyroid (like a lot of women) was out of whack. Sleeping for 20 hours a day was our first clue.

That trip still goes down as one of the most beautiful and quiet trips I've ever done.

And there you have my first and only TR.

" So crap, throw the map off your lap and nap."

He's a poet and didn't... what? Line taken? Man! This is what happens when you come late to a party! Okay, hang on, lemme think...

'Cause Diane is a fan of the Sandman, but you'll still get a slap upside your cap if you have a mishap.

I would much prefer to see the status of stratus change to a serious cirrus.

Since a lot of cirrus is either:
a) a forerunner of a warm front. i.e. stratus and rain on the way. or
b) torn off Cumulonimbus i.e. thunder, lightning, hail, tornadoes, etc.
I think I'd prefer some LPFs.

LPFs? It's an aviation term referring to the fair weather cumulus clouds that develop on nice sunny warm days. LPF stands for Little Puffy... umm... let's say 'fluffers'.

Kinda funny about the seat belts, I remember back in '92
on our first trip down with the kids, they only had to put the belts on
when we went through a city.

I remember lying on the ledge between the top of the backseat and the rear window… which could (and usually was) open.

But right now, at close to ten in the morning in the southern part of the Peach State, I have a problem.

As opposed to any other time????

My tailbone is just screaming, I think from all the rain driving and not used to being a passenger with the stupid
Atlas on my lap I've been sitting funny.

Yeah, but if you’d been sitting Cirrus you wouldn’t have to do rain driving and then you know what you’d have? A much shorter TR.

"ANNNNNNNNND, WE"RE OFF!"
A couple of uneventful days later we took the Western Way to Buena Vista Drive to Caribbean Beach Resort Drive and made a right into heaven.

Well…. That was dull.

But how to get them out of my left front jeans pocket?
Sitting down, these are really tight, no way can you get
your hand inside.

Ya know. All I can focus on is….


Nebo wears tight jeans.

Okay, maybe the ladies are all agog and swooning all over the place…

But…

It’s just not an image I want in my head.

Darn. Too late.

Ok, all of you sitting there at home or work at your computer in your jeans, pretend you have a couple of pills in your left pocket right now, and imagine trying to get them out without changing your position much.
Not too easy, is it?

Got my cell phone in my left jeans pocket. Got it out not problem. Why? No tight jeans. Ack! The image is back! Hey Nebo! Are those pills in your pocket or are you just glad to write this TR?

And while I've got you doing stupid things, with the index finger of your right hand pointed, make large circles with your right hand in a counter clockwise motion in the air, then lean back and do the same thing with your right foot at the same time.
While you are doing this, reverse the direction of just your foot and now go clockwise.
Almost hurt yourself, didn't ya?

Thanks. Just got back from the ER after having sprained my rotator cuff trying to rotate my cuffs. Anything else you want us to do?

‘Okay stand on the edge of a high cliff or building. Flap your arms real fast. Okay now simultaneously take two steps forward. Hurt yourself, didn’t ya?’

I got my thumb in there, but it still couldn't reach the pills,

Is that a thumb in your pocket or are you… oh nevermind.

However, all this movement threw the car's aim off just a tad, and my correcting it
made just a little bit of a jerk back to the left.

… causing a massive 30 car pile up. But that’s a State trouper’s TR.

Quote: “Whats-a behind me is not important.”

This slight jerk was just enough to make Smidgy's head pop up
and look around, just as I had gotten one out and popped it into my mouth.

Hey! Just like my DW.

She reminded me of "Whack a Mole."

Or better yet:
Do do, do do, do dodododo, do do, do do, do doo, do.
Do do, do do, do dodododo, Pop, goes the Smidgy.

To answer TinkerbelleAbbysMom. No you’re not the only one. I kept trying to make all the do do dos fit into the twilight zone theme. Figured it out when I finally gave up and read the ‘Pop, goes the Smidgy’ part.

Nothing worse than a pill that starts dissolving prematurelyin your mouth!

I am SO not going to touch that. What’re you trying to do? Get me kicked off the boards? Hey! Wait a minute!

And I pulled it off without Smidgy knowing about it,

Man I have got to get my mind out of the gutter. What’s with me this morning????

hey, she doesn't come and tell me
every time

Did you know that 75% of women fake it?

she has a drink.

Oh. Nevermind.

Always important to justify it when you do something you
don't want your partner to know, but I pulled it off!

Here we go again!!!!

I mentally patted myself

‘mentally’. Uh hunh.

on the back.

Ah. Okay, check. Time to change subject, no?

I normally drive in the center lane through Georgia and Florida, I leave the left for the real speeders with
radar who want to pass, the right lane for trucks and cars merging.

Ditto. Seems sensible to me. So why did you do it?

Plus, the alignment of most cars is supposed to drift a little bit to the right,,,,kind of like a "dead man's handle" on a freight train, this way, if the driver falls asleep, the car will run off the road to the right rather than head into the oncoming traffic.

Ya know. I’d never heard that. That’s actually quite interesting.

In Canada, they don't pull either way cuz everybody just drives down the middle no matter what way your going,
that's why there are so few Canadians compared to Americans.

Geez, and here I’d gone and just been nice. <Dusts off boxing gloves>
D’ems fightin’ words!

Ah, who am I trying to kid. I can’t speak for elsewhere in the Great White North but drivers in my home town are generally horrible. Most people seemed to have learned how to drive in the 30s and 40s and taught subsequent generations the same mistakes they learned. This of course was well before there were signs, traffic lights and other pesky annoyances. Plus you were probably the only car on the ‘road’ (ox cart trail), so things like signalling, shoulder checks, following rules of the road and driver etiquette weren’t really required. And for the love of Pete! Don’t get me started on merge lanes!!!!!!

Eh?

Huh?

"If you don't put your hands back on the wheel I'm going to get out at
the next rest area and hitch a ride to Disney on the first Harley that comes along!"

Scared the crap out of me!

How do they do that?

They had an all you can eat buffet, which Diane, myself and the oldest son, Todd were going to get.
Of course, now younger son, Jeremy wants it now, too.

Been there, done that!

Finally, at last, we are through Valdosta, and see the Florida Welcome Center.

This was a huge ego booster and mood booster for me, we finally made it to Florida!
It was like Smidgy sensed it too, her head shot up, looked around and she sat back up normal.

Yeah, but then we figure that WDW is just minutes away. Is it just me or does time crawl after this point?

Off in the SE, there is now a small patch of the most beautiful cerulean blue beginning to part the stratus clouds like Moses parting the Red Sea.

Cerulean blue… sorry, I’m a guy, so I only know about 6 colours…. And that ain’t one of ‘em. For some reason it reminds me of Ricardo Montalban and his ‘fine Corinthian leather’.

Now I’m thinking. “Da plane! Da plane!”

Now I’m thinking I need to get out more…

The turnpike is mostly just 2 lanes, I normally stayed in the right lane like you're supposed to but I came
across a small truck going a little bit slower than I was, and wanted, to go.

I once heard a comedian categorize drivers thusly:
There are two kinds of drivers on the road:
1. Jerks, and
2. Idiots
Jerks are anyone and everyone that isn’t driving as fast as I am and should just get out of the way.
Idiots are anyone and everyone that is driving faster than I am and are obviously reckless and shouldn’t drive.

Slowing down, I pulled up to the toll booth and a large, serious looking woman leaned out of the opening with her hand out.

"Yes, I'd like two Big Macs and two small fries, nothing to drink."

I used to do stuff like that. Try it at the airport with the security there. Big laughs. Really!

She just stared a hole right through me and I quickly handed over the money and took off.

Hunh. Maybe… just maybe. She might’ve heard that one before? Maybe not the highlight of her day? Whaddy think? What do I think? You’ll do it again.

"What, did you want a quarter pounder instead?"

After a moment, Smidgy said, "Ok, what happened to most of the spray from that guy, and how did you know it would be a lot less?"

"Elementary my dear, I simply waited until we had reached the top of the small summit that we just came up,
there will be a lot less rainwater sitting on the road at the top of a hill than there is on a flat surface because of run-off, he just ran out of ammo to spray us with!"

Brilliant!

A little up ahead I stop at the guard/gate house, and an older man walks out and comes up
to the window.
As I got close I made sure to coast up to the guardhouse cuz now at these low speeds the car is back to deafening.
With the engine now turned off, I looked at the man.

"Yes, I'd like two Quarter Pounders with Cheese, two,,,,OOF!"

See! I knew it!

Man, is she getting fast with that left elbow!

Way to go Smidgy! You’ll train him yet! You go girl!

"What, now you wanted a Big and Tasty?"

What the heck is a Big and Tasty? I don’t go to Mickey D’s all that often but I don’t think we’ve got that one up here. We do occasionally have the McRib though.

But, wow, we are finally here after the longest drive down we have ever had!

Congratulations…. And I mean that.

I parked in a limited time parking spot, got out and just stood there for a moment looking around.
Yes, with a big, silly grin on my face.
Only Disney can do this to a person.

That’s true.

The Beast roared in anger, then went back to feeding on it's latest corpse.
No, it's not going to forget, and it knows it has time, after all:
what goes down must come back up!

Hmmm… more than the usual afternoon showers?

]Nothing beats arriving at any of the moderate resorts fro check in, every one of them is so cheerful you can't stand it! Not quite so much for the Values, and I don't quite get the same feeling checking in at a Deluxe, they're either too dark in the lobby or too staid.

Interesting point. Now I’m leaning towards a moderate again.

Marita, you know these reports are going to have to be getting shorter once we are there, I am pretty much talked out describing park touring days.

And that’s why I’ll never do a TR. How bored do I wanna make people?

We got to our hotel room and slept. Got up. Went on a bunch of rides. Ate some food.
Repeat for length of trip.

Dull, dull, dull. Who wants to read that??? Stuff happens in your TRs. And thanks for the fun update! Let’s see what the beast will do next! Shall we?

 

[pkondz]

A couple things I'd like to talk about:

Concerning Diane's dad, I'm not going to bring that part up until the end of the report, I'm not going to fit it in chronologically as I normally tell a report because it can't be told any way that makes for fun reading. It will be hard for us to write and read about it again, so after a lot of thought, I think it's best to wait until the end and then go back there and give it it's just due.

Please understand, I thought about this a lot and think this is the best way ot handle it.

You really don't have to explain. I think that any way you would like to handle this particularly difficult situation will be fine. Please don't feel like you need to apologize or explain your actions in regard to this. I understand and I'm pretty sure everyone else on here does too.

Also,
Right before we left to go on the trip, I asked you all a riddle, and I don't believe a single person came up with the answer, maybe I missed it.
So, once again, in a return engagement:

Frank and Thumperman meet early one Evening at the Liberty Tree Tavern thinking they can split a pitcher of beer and compare the fastpasses they've saved up all day.
After laying them on the table,
Frank says: "Hey T-Man, if you give me one of your fastpasses I'll twice as many as you"; and
Thumperman says: "No, you give me one of yours and we'll both have the same amount."

How many fastpasses did they both have?

I knew the answer but forgot to post it way back. And now nowellsl beat me to it. Too bad 'cause I'm something of a mathematical prodigy. Mama said so 'cause I can counts on both hands! Sometimes at the same time!

I'm only doing this because of the responsed I've gotten to the last chapter, nobody at all has made a comment on something I wrote, and I think it may be because I did a little bit too good a job in slipping it in.

The picture at the end of the chapter of the CBR customs house is NOT the end of the chapter, there's a couple of short sentences after it in it's own small section.

I did! I did! And I'm sure curious to see just what the beast does next.

 

[sewmess]

I gotta say.. in spite of the MOST unflattering pic of me in front of CBR.... thAT IS THE most CHEERFUL PLACE TO PULL UP IN FRONT OF!

this was the first place EVER we pulled up to at WDW, with the boys.. it is just so cheerful.. and happy!!!

now, at CBR, you will never see the "custom house" again (unlike POR, POFQ, etc). but that whole resort is just SO cheerful!! the pastel colors.

and after the last few days, we felt like all are trouble were behind us. (yes, we knew we had the exhaust system to deal with, but I knew there was a care care center on property, and I just didn't want to deal with that whole issue right now. it could wait.

right now, we fought like heck to get here!! we are here!!! that was all that mattered. we will deal with the rest of it on the morrow...(my dad always said that)

When I remember things my dad always said, I can sometimes tear up, and sometimes I laugh - knowing how he was. Dad died in 1999.

I saw that you were in that pic and thought -uh-oh, nebo's in for it now. . .and then it reminded me of some footage we have the year we got our video camera; I'm behind the camera and we're on our way to check in at POR: Dh is making editorial type comments about what I should be shooting & the dialogue was something like this:
Him: "Get the sign - that one, up there - "
Me: "I'm getting, I'm getting."
Him: "Are you getting all this?"
Me: "Do you want the camera"
-then there's a jerky shot as I stumble up the minimal curbing.
Me: "Or are you just trying to kill me?"
Men!

What is it with women and car napping?

Not me, buster - Can't do it. You never know what he's up too: driving 95 MPH in a construction zone; pulling vikes out of his jean's pocket; opening a bottle with his teeth - no WAY I'm closing my eyes. Nuh Uh!


CBR seems to be our fave resort - we've stayed there the past two time - next week makes it three in a row.

Yeah - ticker envy indeed - read 'em and weep!

And when I read those last three lines of the last update, I hoped it wasn't any shrimpish delights (If I'm remembering past TRs correctly)

 

[Backstage_Gal]

For any of you yearning to be at Disney right now, let me say be glad you are at home. Miserable rainy days yesterday (some), really bad today, hasnt stopped all day, and predicted to last till Tuesday. Boats, pools, activities cancelled or moved inside. Skies were dark gray all day.

Plus I dont want to go out to get much needed wine!

See, doesnt this make you feel better?

 

[IheartDDuck]

Wow. What a drive that ended up being for you guys.

You know, when I was a kid, we had a car top carrier that we put on top of the Cutlass, and then we got to lay around in the back of the wagon. Man I miss that wood grained beauty. My oh my how times have changed, right?

 

[fsmith2845]

For any of you yearning to be at Disney right now, let me say be glad you are at home. Miserable rainy days yesterday (some), really bad today, hasnt stopped all day, and predicted to last till Tuesday. Boats, pools, activities cancelled or moved inside. Skies were dark gray all day.

Plus I dont want to go out to get much needed wine!

See, doesnt this make you feel better?

I hear ya.. but you know.. a "BAD" day at Disney is still better than the best day at work.. sooooo.. yeah still have Disney envy!!!

 

[sewmess]

For any of you yearning to be at Disney right now, let me say be glad you are at home. Miserable rainy days yesterday (some), really bad today, hasnt stopped all day, and predicted to last till Tuesday. Boats, pools, activities cancelled or moved inside. Skies were dark gray all day.

Plus I dont want to go out to get much needed wine!

See, doesnt this make you feel better?

As long as it's gone by Friday - We'll be drivin' down then. Maybe we'll bring y'all some sun

 

[pkondz]

As long as it's gone by Friday - We'll be drivin' down then. Maybe we'll bring y'all some sun

I smiled when I read this post. But laughed out loud when I read the edit!

 

[nebo]

Time to roll up the sleeves and get right to work now and find out who else I ticked off:

. Glad u guys made it safe and sound, well mostly sound. maybe a little scarred.

Very good, this is the "dimension of sight and sound"

You should be happy I didn't post under my mom's name to add to the confusion

That'l work: Tink, the yellow librarian

Frank has 7
Thumperman has 5

Neither one has beer at the Magic Kingdom....

Yeah, we have a winner, excellent my dear!

Okay… with this one.. I’ve always heard it’s with the index finger of your right hand make a circle one way and then with the index finger on your left, make it go the other way…. At the same time… I am the ONLY PERSON I know that can do this. I always heard no one can do this because it would mean two different parts of your brain would have to send conflicting messages to the same part of your body at the same time. My way of solving this… the same way “Patch” solves the “4” problem in “Patch Adams”… look past the problem. If you stare at something other than your hands while I’m making circle going different way, I can do it… the problem is, if you concentrate on it.. which by telling you to do said thing you will… you can’t do it…. But either way, I’ve never been able to find anyone else who can do it. Confused yet? I feel like I should upload a video to Youtube and just send you a link so you can see what I mean.

Hmmm, I think something might be amiss here Becca, maybe you are membering it wrong. I'm usually pretty normal when it comes to doing things like this, but with my two index fingers, I can simultaneously go clockwise, or counter clockwise, or clockwise with my left and counter with my right, or even the other way around without even trying hard. I'm saying I can make circles on demand with my index fingers, and I got a feeling most people can too. Either that or I'm a lot weirder than I thought I was and join you.

Great chapter, Nebo! Your description of trying to get your pills while driving reminded me of the scene in 'Planes, Trains and Automobiles' when John Candy is driving and Steve Martin is asleep andJohn Candy gets his sleeves stuck on the car seat and must try to drive without waking Steve Martin. Funny stuff :good vibes.

Darn, I really don't remember much abut that movie.


Can't wait to read the WDW part of the trip now .

I keep thinking, Melky Cabrera when I see your name, any other guys think that too? Now that we are safe at the resort, prepare for a lot of resort pictures coming up.

Which is a real pity. It would contribute greatly to my retirement fund

It still doesn't seem right that they can name something a "tavern" and not even sell beer there!

I am just wondering if I am the only one that had to really think out and read all of the do, do do... part to figure out the "Smidgy in the box" song?

Murph I'm really glad to hear that, I spent a lot more time than I thought I would working with my do do's, making sure it would come out perfect if you sang along with.
( boy that sentence just seems so wrong)
It's not easy with the complex instrumental classics that don't have any lyrics until the end putting the sheet music down on paper. Instead of 3/4 or 4/4 time, you can right a symphony with correct use of dos and doos, and meticulous usage of commas.

You got me Nebo. I saw that riddle when you first posted it. Mathematically I cant make it work and I consider myself to be a pretty bright guy after all I are a engineer. I'm sure there is some trickery a foot in the solution.

Hey, guess what? The nickel just dropped in for me, guess I'm slow this week.
When I see your name I've been saying; Huh-shoo- poo, in my mind, now I finally see it's pure Archie Bunker.

As for the riddle, I originally heard it as two farmers meeting up with sheep, and though I did figure it out on my own, it was only by trial and error, I knew they had to be only two numbers apart and just started doing all the possible combinations till it worked.

I remember telling it to Diane's Dad who was pretty good at math. It took him quite a while but eventually he came up with an algebraic formula for it and the answer using it, just don't ask me to reproduce it now.


Great update I wont be reading for a few days. I'm getting married in the morning then me and my lovely new bride will be going away for a few days. Hope to see a new update when I return

Excellent my friend, congratulations! Hope your new bride is being taught the wonders of DisneyWorld and is one of us.

By the way, I did see the very ominous beast section at the bottom. I am afraid, very afraid and I really was trying to block it out. Thanks for reminding me that the beast is biding it's time, licking it's wounds, waiting for another go round.

After while Crocodile!

Buzz, even though I deleted most of your post for space reasons and cuz I'm a bit embarrassed, I did read it all.
Ok, ok, read it all twice.

Ok, ok, read it all three times.

Ok, ok, read it all and printed it out and hung it on the wall in a custom frame.
But I really appreciated your comments, but I will say once again, I have the best contributors helping me out here, this is DEFINATELY a team effort that almost 100 DIFFERENT people are adding to and making it seem like Comedy Central!
My hats off to EVERYBODY here!, You make my job easy.

PS: Maybe I shoud take classes? In what though?
Open to suggestions, I need something to do in my retirement years

PPS:i'll never be a great writer, so maybe I'm lost cause. Shuffleboard anyone?

Now that's funny! But hey, you too good for Bingo?

buzz. now look what you've done. how wil I live with im now? but everything you siad was true, and it was very nice of you to say it. I will now blush for hubby.

Geesh, she not only finishes my sentences for me but now she intercepts my attaboys and blushes for me too! just kiddin, than you honey.

Great chapter!



I remember the good old days when we kids would just roll around the back of the station wagon like weebles.

Nebos wobble but they don't fall down.




Smidgy is too much!

yes she is, not sure of what, though.

This is why we're not doing the dining plan next trip. Our daughter is going to be 10 and no way does she eat like a Disney "adult."

Got news for you, we did the Trail's End buffet on this trip, afterward we realized that all the buffets are kicking our butts price wise cuz we just don'[t eat the way we used to be able to, and changes some plans because of just that.



Funny! Sounds like something my dad would do.
(smart alecky line about Big Macs to toll booth lady)

I think my Dad would have said something like,
"why don't you now take this money and start fixing these potholes, you know?

Can't wait for more!

Me too, who's turn is it?

 

[Self_resqing_princz]

You know, the whole weather ordeal driving down reminds me of my niece's birthday in May. Now, living in Illinois, I know you guys know what the weather is like in spring in the Midwest.
I was driving from Terre Haute (on the Illionis/Indiana boarder- where 41 & 70 cross)... driving to Columbus, Indiana. Terre Haute is about an hour and a half west of Indianapolis and Columbus is about an hour south of Indianapolis.
I left Terre Haute around 3 in the afternoon and had to be in Columbus for dinner by 6.
(I had a family thing in Terre Haute and then had a DH's niece's birthday party in Columbus). Normally 3 hours is more than enough to get from one place to the other... But this time there was a cold front, hitting a warm front over mid-Illinois and headed east to Indiana. My whole trip east I was watching the black clouds following me in my rear-view mirror.
Now, normally someone who had to be somewhere at a certain time, who knows a HUGE storm is coming sticks to the route they know... but not me.
My husband had verbally told me of a route (about 2 years ago) you could take to get around to the south side of Indy, without ever actually going through Indy.
So, I got off of 70, the exit before Indy, went south and it started to rain. I made a few wrong turns and got lost in the country. The road turned from nicely paved, to badly paved... then I passed 4 trailer homes.. where there were two guys doing target practice who stopped to stare at me as I was going by and then road turned to gravel. I passed a turn, and then a sign for a dead end.
Then the thunder and lightening started and the rain now became a monsoon.
With no cars behind me, I backed up and took the turn right (back west). The road curved around until I had no idea which direction I was headed... but then I found a road that was paved and took it.
With no street signs to even tell me what road I was on, I turned on the radio and tried to find a local station.... all I could find was... the emergency warning system, warning of a tornado spotted just north west of Martinsville, headed south-west. I thought, there's no way I'm near Martinsville and turn the radio off.
I passed a gas station with literally 1 pump... and 1 car in the parking area... and I pulled over. I got my atlas out of my trunk and ran inside just as it started to hail.
I went inside and asked the teenage girl behind the counter where I was. She told me I was "technically still in Martinsville, but if you go about 10 more miles that way, I'll hit Bloomington." WHAT? I'm AN HOUR in the wrong direction! Too far south and too far west!
My cell phone had 1 bar so I called my husband and told him I was lost. I told him what the girl at the gas station told me. I went to go outside when the hail that was pea sized turned to golf ball sized and I decided to get back in the car and head the way I came from... still not knowing which direction I was going.
I drove about a mile until it got so dark I couldn't see... and now there's debris.. not just leaves.. but limbs that were longer than I were tall... and I decided that was it.. I'd rather die in a gas station than in my car in a tree somewhere, where my body would never be found.
I went back to the gas station and ran back inside. Now I am soaked thru to my underwear.
The girl behind the counter is now on the phone and there is a guy with those spacer things talking to her... he's got holes big enough to fit the hail into and his hair is black (like shoe polish black) and spikey. Why hadn't I noticed the girls nose ring and dragon tattoo down her arm last time I was in here?
I called my husband back, this time yelling near the back of the store "I'm going to die in HillBilly Hell.. look for the best car in the town.. that's where you'll find my body... hopefully." and hung up...
The door opened and leather-handbag tanned woman with a white tank top and very bleached hair came in and asked the girl behind the counter "is that her?"-- while she pointed at me.
I thought "this is great, they've already come to get the outsider!"
The girl behind the counter said "yes, that's her."
And the lady said "come here, I think I can help you."
she showed me on the map where I was, showed me which way I needed to go... and then told me "after the yellow house you need to turn right onto the county road.... (she searched the map and said).. but it's not on the map. Then you'll hit 31 and you need to turn right on that and take it south. That will get you to Columbus."
I thanked her... but decided since the hail was coming down harder now I decided to stay inside until the hail quit... after about 3 minutes it didn't stop and I didn't want to stay there any longer than I had to.
I got in my car and took off in the direction the lady had told me and turned on the radio again... at least now if the EBS came on I'd know roughly where I was. I kept my map in the passenger seat but followed what I could remember of her directions. I watched the sky carefully... and saw two spots of rotation in the clouds... one directly in front of me and one off to the east-south-east... out the passenger side of my windshield.
I passed a few farm houses and passed 1 truck with it's flashers on, going the opposite way. So, I'm not just worried, I'm panicked.
About 20 minutes later I found the county road she had told me about... then the road turned back into gravel... and it twisted around alot. Then the EBS hopped on and said there had been a tornado spotted on the ground just east of Martinsville... so, about where I was.... great.. just great...
I tried calling DH again, no signal.. so I did what I would like to think any normal 20-something female would do in this situation. I CRIED HYSTERICALLY and talked to myself saying I was never going to get there and I was going to be swept up in this damn tornado.
My windshield wipers were on high, my brights were on and I had to slow down to 20 to see the road.
That's when there was more debris... tree limbs... a snapped telephone pole, a car under a huge tree limb... I cried harder.
Now, I've never been in a tornado but I've heard people say everything gets quiet and then it sounds like a freight train... This thought had just popped into my mind when everything turned green and the rain and hail stopped.
NOW I COMPLETELY FREAK OUT. I put my phone on speaker, hit DH's parents house on speed dial and started screaming... I didn't even wait for it to ring.. there's a tornado coming, I'm going to die.. I'm near Franklin I don't know exactly where I am... this is the road I'm on... I don't know what to do.
DH's father had apparently picked up the phone while I was screaming and he said "calm down and when you get to a spot where you can, pull over and call us when it passes."
I thought you're hillarious, you want me to pull over in the middle of no where, wait for the tornado to pitch me into a tree AND THEN call you... right...
The hail, the rain, thunder and lightening begin again... this time with REALLY strong wind.
So, I get to the first stop light I've seen in over an hour, I turn and I'm now in the last "city" before you get to Columbus... Franklin. Now I am so overwhelmed with happiness at least knowing where I am, I start to laugh.
If anyone else had seen me, they'd think I was going crazy.
I turn south onto 31, when the EBS goes off again, saying a tornado has been spotted on the ground, near U.S. 31 about 1 mile north of Franklin.
line from Finding Nemo-- Marlin: "Good feeling gone."
Even though it's pouring and I can still barely see, I know the speed limit here is 50, so I go for 50, everything still on high-- wipers, headlights.. and now also the defroster...
Then the EBS goes off... as does the station itself.. it goes completely to static.
Between Franklin and Columbus there are nothing but corn and soybean fields on either side of the road... no trees, no houses, no nothing. I passed about 4 or 5 cars are parked on the side of the road, flashers on in a matter of about 3 miles.. people are getting out of their cars and looking north... I didn't DARE look at my rear view mirror.
Finally I make it to where 31 and 65 south cross, I take 65 south to the next exit... Columbus... and then I pull into the drive way just as everyone is coming out to listen to the tornado sirens going off... in the city...
However, overhead is beautiful blue skies.. the driveway isn't even wet.
I'm still soaked thru..
I get out and stand with them.. all of us looking toward Columbus. The sirens stop and then, for what seems like an hour... it's quiet. It was such an eerie feeling. No highway noise, no sirens, no nothing...
Then a long line of Sheriff's cars and ambulances race down the road with their lights on.. but no sirens. We can see across the field in front of the house that they are blocking traffic into town. And the ambulances get back on the highway and head into town.
We go inside and turn on the tv. After we see there is currently a tornado hitting Columbus the lights go out and we spent the next hour in the basement.
Now, at their house nothing ever happened... it didn't even rain... but that was the SCARIEST night of my life!
The tv station I work for was down there... apparently right behind me somewhere on 65, and they pulled off into the parking lot of the Wal-Mart and got this video:
http://www.fox59.com/news/wxin-torn...reported-in-columbus-20110525,0,1561350.story

 

[nebo]

Hmm, guess I didn't have those sleeves rolled up high enough.

What is it with women and car napping? Pre rug rats, DW and I decided to drive to Toronto to visit my sister... and see the sights of TO. We also decided to drive the longer way through Canada to see the fall colours (about 1300 miles/2000 kms... same as through the States but single lane/slower speed limits). We left early in the day and within 20 minutes, DW was out like a light. She woke up 5 times. Once for lunch, once when we got to our hotel and the other three went like this:
Me, "Oh, honey, look! Beautiful!" (Referring to the scenery)
DW, "Huh? Whazza? What? Oh? Yeah, nice." (As her head slowly spirals up from deep sleep position to looking out passenger door)
Me, "Uh, no honey... not over there, over there." (Points in totally opposite direction of whatever boring thing she may have seen through bleary eyes in wrong direction.)
DW, "Oh, okay, nicezzzzzzzz."

After checking in to the hotel and having dinner, she'd be asleep by 8 or 9 and sleep 'til 7 -8 next morning.

Repeat all above two more times.


Only later did we find out that her thyroid (like a lot of women) was out of whack. Sleeping for 20 hours a day was our first clue.

That's what a thyroid is, or does?
I thought thyroids were those little lumpy pockets that a lot of people call cottage cheese that forms on mostly women's thighs.
Looks like I'm wrong again.



And there you have my first and only TR.

It was better than a lot I've read, but next time I'd include at least a few pictures.


LPFs? It's an aviation term referring to the fair weather cumulus clouds that develop on nice sunny warm days. LPF stands for Little Puffy... umm... let's say 'fluffers'.

Ooh, ooh, I saw the sequel to that, "Meet the Little Puffy Fockers"




As opposed to any other time????

Ok, I had a new, specific problem that was indigenous to the time and current location that my being was occupying presently. Better?

Yeah, but if you’d been sitting Cirrus you wouldn’t have to do rain driving and then you know what you’d have? A much shorter TR.

The sacrifices a cirrus writer has to make fro his readers.




Ya know. All I can focus on is….


Nebo wears tight jeans.

Okay, maybe the ladies are all agog and swooning all over the place…

But…

It’s just not an image I want in my head.

Darn. Too late.



Got my cell phone in my left jeans pocket. Got it out not problem. Why? No tight jeans. Ack! The image is back! Hey Nebo! Are those pills in your pocket or are you just glad to write this TR?




‘Okay stand on the edge of a high cliff or building. Flap your arms real fast. Okay now simultaneously take two steps forward. Hurt yourself, didn’t ya?’

Did you try to do it? Really? I don't think you did!




To answer TinkerbelleAbbysMom. No you’re not the only one. I kept trying to make all the do do dos fit into the twilight zone theme. Figured it out when I finally gave up and read the ‘Pop, goes the Smidgy’ part.

I was afraid the Twilight Zone was going to kick in first for most people, but Thumperman is already collecting the royalties for that from his post and I didn't want to have to pay him too.




Did you know that 75% of women fake it?

yeah, but nobody can fake it like Meg can.


Ya know. I’d never heard that. That’s actually quite interesting.

Yes when you live as long as I have, you too will acquire absolutely fabulously interesting things like that!

But then you forget them the next day.



Ah, who am I trying to kid. I can’t speak for elsewhere in the Great White North but drivers in my home town are generally horrible. Most people seemed to have learned how to drive in the 30s and 40s and taught subsequent generations the same mistakes they learned. This of course was well before there were signs, traffic lights and other pesky annoyances. Plus you were probably the only car on the ‘road’ (ox cart trail), so things like signalling, shoulder checks, following rules of the road and driver etiquette weren’t really required. And for the love of Pete! Don’t get me started on merge lanes!!!!!!

I really have no idea on how they drive in Canada, the only time I've been in a car up there was with my folks on a trip when I was about 12 years old.
Boy, that Model A was really cool!



Cerulean blue… sorry, I’m a guy, so I only know about 6 colours…. And that ain’t one of ‘em. For some reason it reminds me of Ricardo Montalban and his ‘fine Corinthian leather’.

Now I’m thinking. “Da plane! Da plane!”

Now I'm pictureing Tatoo standing on the bridge of the Enterprise yelling that with Khan standing next to him, holking a knife to McCoy's throat and nobody will have any idea probably on what the heck I'm talking about so I'll shut up now.



Hunh. Maybe… just maybe. She might’ve heard that one before? Maybe not the highlight of her day? Whaddy think? What do I think? You’ll do it again.


What the heck is a Big and Tasty? I don’t go to Mickey D’s all that often but I don’t think we’ve got that one up here. We do occasionally have the McRib though.

Come to think of it, not sure if they still have the Big and Tasty and I don't realy remember exactly what it was.
Maybe it was from Burger King?


Interesting point. Now I’m leaning towards a moderate again.



And that’s why I’ll never do a TR. How bored do I wanna make people?

We got to our hotel room and slept. Got up. Went on a bunch of rides. Ate some food.
Repeat for length of trip.

Dull, dull, dull. Who wants to read that??? Stuff happens in your TRs. And thanks for the fun update! Let’s see what the beast will do next! Shall we?

We'll see about that, no need to be hasty about the decision. I know! Bring me with and I got a feeling you might be able to find something to write about.

I did! I did! And I'm sure curious to see just what the beast does next.

Here's the truth:
I really considered just staying with the entire "driving" part of the trip, since the entire first few chapters were all about just that, I thoght I'd stay with that, and finish it all off, since it almost finished us off.
But I really thought that if I did that and continued on, nobody but nobody would believe it and think I'm making the whole thing up after all we've already been through, so that part will stay I guess till we come up to it normally.

When I remember things my dad always said, I can sometimes tear up, and sometimes I laugh - knowing how he was. Dad died in 1999.

I saw that you were in that pic and thought -uh-oh, nebo's in for it now. . .and then it reminded me of some footage we have the year we got our video camera; I'm behind the camera and we're on our way to check in at POR: Dh is making editorial type comments about what I should be shooting & the dialogue was something like this:
Him: "Get the sign - that one, up there - "
Me: "I'm getting, I'm getting."
Him: "Are you getting all this?"
Me: "Do you want the camera"
-then there's a jerky shot as I stumble up the minimal curbing.
Me: "Or are you just trying to kill me?"
Men!


Wwe got our Handycam in '90, I was the video taker almost all the time back then but I know that running narration well.

Not me, buster - Can't do it. You never know what he's up too: driving 95 MPH in a construction zone; pulling vikes out of his jean's pocket; opening a bottle with his teeth - no WAY I'm closing my eyes. Nuh Uh!


CBR seems to be our fave resort - we've stayed there the past two time - next week makes it three in a row.

Yeah - ticker envy indeed - read 'em and weep!

Wow, TEI, yep it definately worked, I wanna go and get lost on the bridge again!

And when I read those last three lines of the last update, I hoped it wasn't any shrimpish delights (If I'm remembering past TRs correctly)

Ok, just for maybe needed clarification, "knowing what goes down must come back up" refers to us,,,, we DROVE down, and will have to DRIVE, back up.
No, not to "Don't peel and eat, shrimp."

For any of you yearning to be at Disney right now, let me say be glad you are at home. Miserable rainy days yesterday (some), really bad today, hasnt stopped all day, and predicted to last till Tuesday. Boats, pools, activities cancelled or moved inside. Skies were dark gray all day.

Huh? You cancelled some boating activities and moved them inside? Dang, changes already since we've been there!

Plus I dont want to go out to get much needed wine!

See, doesnt this make you feel better?

All day rains would just break my heart in Disney, that's such a rare occasion for you. I think Clearwate has the all time record in the US for consecutive days with at least some sunshine,,, something like 858 or something ridiculous like that.

Wow. What a drive that ended up being for you guys.

You know, when I was a kid, we had a car top carrier that we put on top of the Cutlass, and then we got to lay around in the back of the wagon. Man I miss that wood grained beauty. My oh my how times have changed, right?

Ok, I had told Frank before that we also drove down in a Dodge Caravan on our second trip to the Mouse, but our very first trip from Carpentersville to Disney, our first trip, period to Disney, was in a 1979 WOOD GRAINED Buick Estate Wagon. And I got only as far as Kankakee when the cruise control died.

I hear ya.. but you know.. a "BAD" day at Disney is still better than the best day at work.. sooooo.. yeah still have Disney envy!!!

Envy? Me? Do you believe me when I tell you that as I'm typing this, I'm drinking a Black Velvet whiskey and Sprite with a dash of cherry juice in an old Pop Century refillable mug.

 

[buzz1121]

Buzz, you expressed what I meant but couldnt put into words. Thanks!

PS: Maybe I shoud take classes? In what though?
Open to suggestions, I need something to do in my retirement years

PPS:i'll never be a great writer, so maybe I'm lost cause. Shuffleboard anyone?

Marita, I would love to play some games, but I haven't played many adult games since the kids were born. You up for a mean, thrilling game of Candy Land?

buzz. now look what you've done. how wil I live with im now? but everything you siad was true, and it was very nice of you to say it. I will now blush for hubby.

I know it, I have been on a tear so to speak. I thought about the obviously needed sign, "Caution: Don't Feed the Nego!"

Sometimes, particularly when a Nebo TR length is in question, the truth must be spoken for the greater good!

Buzz, even though I deleted most of your post for space reasons and cuz I'm a bit embarrassed, I did read it all.
Ok, ok, read it all twice.

Ok, ok, read it all three times.

Ok, ok, read it all and printed it out and hung it on the wall in a custom frame.
But I really appreciated your comments, but I will say once again, I have the best contributors helping me out here, this is DEFINATELY a team effort that almost 100 DIFFERENT people are adding to and making it seem like Comedy Central!
My hats off to EVERYBODY here!, You make my job easy.

Aww, Nebo, I glad you liked it. We do all contribute, but you are a heck of a ring leader. I just want the TR to last as long as possible, so if you want to wax poetic about any tangent, by all means go for it!

We will all enjoy it, I feel confident about that!

And never fear, I won't always lapse into sentiment, just when it is needed. I like the sarcasm and snark!

 

[nebo]

Wow, Rebecca of not so SunnyBrook Farms, that was a great story, very well done and I'm sure as well, terrifying to you. Who says there' nothing to do in Indiana besides Indiana Beach and Santa Clauseland or Holiday World or whtatever that is that's where Jay Cutler came from. Nice job keeping your head, really.

 

[Backstage_Gal]

Marita, I would love to play some games, but I haven't played many adult games since the kids were born. You up for a mean, thrilling game of Candy Land?

I am ashamed to say I have never played a game of Candy Land in my life! I grew up in Germany in the 50's and 60's, I dont know if that counts, but I guess I committed a grievous (sp?) sin depriving my kids who grew up in the US of it.

But if we ever should meet, I'll give it try

 

[pkondz]

You know, the whole weather ordeal driving down reminds me of my niece's birthday in May.

Wow! A harrowing tale, beautifully told. I was on the edge of my seat the whole time. I wonder if we all have these stories of close calls/scary moments while driving. I know I do, you do and Nebo and Smidgy do. That's a pretty high percentage already!

 

[Backstage_Gal]

Try driving at night in the rain with cataracts, tons of fun!

Don't need any drugs to see shining lights glittering all around and blinding you while not being able to see where the road is. Yep, that's the ticket!

Luckily, I got that fixed finally. Still dread driving in the dark though.

 

[pkondz]

yeah, but nobody can fake it like Meg can.

One of the best scenes ever... except possibly for Rob Reiner's mom immediately afterwards.

Now I'm pictureing Tatoo standing on the bridge of the Enterprise yelling that with Khan standing next to him, holking a knife to McCoy's throat and nobody will have any idea probably on what the heck I'm talking about so I'll shut up now.

Of course we know what you're talking about...

KHAAANNNN!!!!

We'll see about that, no need to be hasty about the decision. I know! Bring me with and I got a feeling you might be able to find something to write about.

That would be an interesting trip. Hmmm.... just you and me? We'd either kill ourselves laughing or kill each other. Which do you think?

 

[Backstage_Gal]

I vote for laughing, and I want a ring side seat!

But, a killing could be thrilling...

 

[pkondz]

I vote for laughing, and I want a ring side seat!

But, a killing could be thrilling...

Ya gotta love a woman with panache. Maybe a twisted form of panache, but... So I'm at work (If it's midnight, I must be working... but no more midnights after this for 6 months!) ... what's your excuse for being up this late?