Overproctective parenting?

[Tinkermommy]

My daughter has been in martial arts for 2 years with the same teacher. Recently my neighbor has been bringing her 2 children (boy around 8 and girl around 6) to the same class.

When they didn't show up for a couple of weeks, I asked the teacher if they had been sick. He said they had withdrawn from class. Apparently in a week my daughter wasn't there a boy fell on the wood floor while trying to do a kick and split his chin. ( He did need a couple of stitches, but he has since started back in class.) This is the first time I have heard about an injury in this class.

So that same day when my neighbor came back to pick up her kids the instructor told all the parents about the injury. She went downstairs and immediately canceled their class. She told the instructor that she didn't want to take chances that her kids could get hurt.

I am not close to this neighbor. She rarely lets her kids out to play. And I hate to say it but they don't know how to play with other kids. There will be 8 kids out there and the daughter wants to talk to me and the son is kind of timid and just stands around.

I understand that kids can get hurt playing sports. Heck, they can get hurt walking down the stairs. But to not let them experience things (like sports) just because they may get hurt I think is a bit much. I think she is doing them a big disservice by isolating them from typical kid experiences.

On another note, my grandmother wouldn't let my uncle play hockey because she heard someone got killed when a puck hit them. But she let him play football which is rife with injuries.

So are there any sports you won't let your kids participate in because they might get hurt?

 

[kimblebee]

You can get hurt doing just about anything so I don't really limit what my daughter can do. She knows to be careful and I trust her to do so.

 

[tlbwriter]

I freely admit that I am overprotective and even I think this mom has gone too far!

 

[minkydog]

H-E-L-I-C-O-P-T-E-R. Your neighbor is being ridiculous. It would be different if the child was injured because someone else hurt him. Kids fall down. Kids get hurt. Sometimes they need a bandaid and sometimes they need stitches. I consider that a part of normal childhood.

 

[punkin]

It's a MARTIAL art, right. The whole purpose of it is to learn how to fight, defend, and get hurt. I think your neighbor has serious issues.

 

[robinb]

So are there any sports you won't let your kids participate in because they might get hurt?

I'm glad that my DD is not a boy because I would probably have a problem with football. Thank goodness she shows no interest in playing even flag football! She did diving for 1/2 of a season and then decided that she didn't like it. I'm glad, because I have seen some pretty bad injuries from hitting the diving board too!

 

[Colleen27]

No, but I'll be honest - I do worry about football. Not enough to stop DS from playing, but it is there in the back of my mind. My husband survived playing hockey, football, and wrestling as a kid/teen so he tends to balance me out when I'm veering off to the too-overprotective side.

 

[SAHDad]

I'll confess that there are times where I have some overprotective tendencies (e.g. - I got hit by a car as a kid, nearly lost my leg, so I get very overprotective when it comes to crossing the street and such), but that's just silly.

You play a sport, odds are good that you will get hurt, either in competition, or in practice. It happens. Learning how to deal with it is part of growing up.

Besides, as Captain Lance Murdoch said, "Bones heal, chicks dig scars, and the United States of America has the best doctor-to-daredevil ratio in the world."

 

[WDWorBUST]

I am definitely overprotective and I think this is ridiculous. I will say however that the doctor has recommended that I not allow my daughter to participate in martial arts (which I would love to be able to let her) or horseback riding. He also said she would need to wear a special type of protective jacket thing if she played soccer.....but she has a horseshoe kidney causing her kidneys to be lower and more "exposed" to injury by taking a hit in the stomach. She did participate in gymnastics for 3 years which has a very high rate of injury, but she enjoyed it. She just got burned out. She does dance and I think she wants to try piano next. As much as I have a tendency to try.....my realistic side knows that I can't keep her in a bubble and I would be doing her an injustice to try. She has wiped out multiple times on her bike and scooter over the last month and it kills me, but I'm not going to stop her from doing it...just make sure she wears her helmet and encourage her to be careful.

 

[tlbwriter]

I'm glad that my DD is not a boy because I would probably have a problem with football.

I would have issues with football and competitive cheerleading (maybe even non-competitive cheerleading, depending on what they do).

 

[luvmy3]

Myabe she was upset that the instructor told all the parents about her child's injury and maybe she didn't want to tell him that.
Did he tell you and all the parents what she said about her kid getting hurt? I would withdraw from that school and find another one where the instructor wasn't gossiping about the parents

If I am wrong, then yes she is being way too overprotective.

 

[golfgal]

DS18 played football for one season. I was not thrilled that he wanted to play but I let him anyway. It really had nothing to do with football but everything to do with is size. He was VERY small for his age going against kids easily twice his size and weight. He only did one season because he figured out he was too small too.

You wouldn't think it but marching band is one "sport" that tends to have more injuries than any other. A couple weeks ago we were at a competition and EVERY band had at least one kid with their arm in a sling .

 

[Nik's Mom]

I think the mom went too far. There are risks involved in life. Now I'm not saying to let your kids play chicken in the middle of the street, but let the kids play and live a little.

 

[JVL1018]

My 9 year old son wants to play football next year and it does scare me.

I won't say no(my husband played from age 8-18 so he's telling me it's all fine), but if he decides not to, I'd be relieved.

My 11 year old daughter cheers, but she is not a flier, so I'm fine with it.
She pitches on her softball team and that makes me nervous..but I don't tell her and I don't not let her pitch--but I do relax much more at the games where she plays 1st base.

 

[Mickeypooh99]

I don't want my boys to play football. Thank goodness they haven't expressed an interest. I don't know if I would actually go so far as to forbid it. My youngest DS is only in the 7th percentile for height and weight. I could just see him getting crushed by the much larger players.

 

[Smile&Nod]

you can't protect them from everything in life - would anyone consider ballet a "dangerous sport"? my daughter slipped on pointe and wrecked her ankle for 3 months! Did I make her stop - no - just chalked it up to life....

 

[KAMLEM]

Myabe she was upset that the instructor told all the parents about her child's injury and maybe she didn't want to tell him that.
Did he tell you and all the parents what she said about her kid getting hurt? I would withdraw from that school and find another one where the instructor wasn't gossiping about the parents

If I am wrong, then yes she is being way too overprotective.

I don't think it was the neighbor's child that got hurt, it was another child in the class. Where did the OP say anything about the instructor gossiping about parents? He was simply telling them about the child's injury.

 

[SC Minnie]

Considering DD16 broke her arm twice while running on the playground I shouldn't have even let her walk outside. But then again she wasn't safe in the house either-- she fell on a door hinge and had 3 stiches in her forehead.

 

[golfgal]

you can't protect them from everything in life - would anyone consider ballet a "dangerous sport"? my daughter slipped on pointe and wrecked her ankle for 3 months! Did I make her stop - no - just chalked it up to life....

No kidding, nor SHOULD you. I know plenty of kids that have fallen out of bed and needed stitches, does she make her kids sleep on the floor just in case?

 

[Colleen27]

Considering DD16 broke her arm twice while running on the playground I shouldn't have even let her walk outside. But then again she wasn't safe in the house either-- she fell on a door hinge and had 3 stiches in her forehead.

That's me too - I've had stitches exactly twice, once from tripping and hitting my chin on a tree root and once when I fell on the playground and landed on a sharp rock. I think life might just be too dangerous for me.

Could be worse, though... I have a friend who broke her arm when she rolled off a couch in her sleep!