Our trip is canceled :(

[mshanson3121]

And I'm sure the extra time you need for travel if driving is a factor. We had a 4 day vacation planned over this year's Thanksgiving. However, we decided that that money would be better utilized doing some household improvements, and instead are going to just visit family in the area, and go to MK for a day. The trip will still cost us around $1000, but the kids will have a great time seeing family and having the day at MK. We are planning a week long trip for next year, however, when we get to the total, we might again look around and decide to use the money elsewhere. "adulting" as they call it, is a real bummer some times.

What you need to do is convince some family members to move to Orlando. Then your problem will be half way solved

Definitely the travel time is a factor. We drive because it's cheaper, so to be able to get to NH in one easy day, rather than having to spend 3 long days driving is definitely a perk to him.

I'm sorry. I know my husband is the primary wage-earner and when things are stressful at work, it's a lot for him. He feels pressure from work, obviously, but also because he has financially support us completely and worries about what would happen if his job was cut. We tried the same thing - let's do some non-Disney vacations, save $ etc... and in some cases it was great, but in others, we actually found that the financial savings/difference wasn't worth it. I'd happily try a longer NH trip for now - especially since you said you see the point and $ savings and just put Disney on the back burner for a year or two.

Yes, this very much. I am a SAHM due to necessity (DD has ASD and health issues, so we homeschool), and so my husband is the sole income earner, and yes, this does put a lot of pressure on him. I think even more so because he knows I need to be home, rather than it's just a choice, kwim? I know enrollment numbers have been down at the college, and I do think he worries that his contract could not be renewed in another year or two. So, perhaps that is driving his decision.

I guess I look at it the opposite - I would rather do Disney now, while he does have that job, while we do have the cash to do it, rather than wait, and then not end up being able to do it down the road. Because the other trip, realistically, will more than likely always be a possibility. But again, that brings up the validity of his side too - maybe it is just better to do a smaller vacation and do some home renos (not needs, just wants) now, while we can. And part of being a grown up is letting go of things we want. Like Disney trips. *sigh*

 

[tlmadden73]

Haha,


While this will probably add fuel to the "anti-husband" fire, I'm actually the bookkeeper of the family. To him, I don't think he sees it as a matter of affording it (we can afford the trip), but rather, he doesn't WANT to spend all our spare money on a trip to Disney, when we could take the kids elsewhere for half the cost and then spend that money on something else instead (house renos etc...).

I understand that ..

It's the same philosophy of being able to afford a big car .. but not really "needing" it .. so you buy a Honda Fit for much cheaper and then later spend that money saved elsewhere (say on a Disney vacation ).

It really comes down to what you (as a family) value for your entertainment dollars.

I value family vacations .. so I wanted to get a mini-van to make those trips fun and comfortable. (wherever we decide to go)

I don't really value a home entertainment center .. so while my brother-in-law buys a new giant TV every year (because that is what he values for his entertainment dollar) .. I am happy with my TVs I've had for 4-5 years.
I'd rather take that money and spend a few days on a family vacation..

 

[maxiesmom]

That doesn't mean she should take away from vacation funds for her whole family to satisfy her Disney wants, either.

While most people here are truly Disney fanatics, the reality is that most people do not have the funds for separate vacations from the rest of their family, nor the desire to vacation without them.

Not sure where I said she should take money for a solo trip.

 

[maxiesmom]

I guess I look at it the opposite - I would rather do Disney now, while he does have that job, while we do have the cash to do it, rather than wait, and then not end up being able to do it down the road. Because the other trip, realistically, will more than likely always be a possibility. But again, that brings up the validity of his side too - maybe it is just better to do a smaller vacation and do some home renos (not needs, just wants) now, while we can. And part of being a grown up is letting go of things we want. Like Disney trips. *sigh*

Part of being married is making those sorts of decisions together. And remember it isn't as if you can't go to Disney in a few years. Compromise is good. Giving up totally on what you want because you are told to be an adult is not.

 

[mshanson3121]

OP--have you followed Dave Ramsey at all? In your budget the family vacation should be a separate fund from household repairs. You shouldn't steal from one to fund the other.

We have a family budget that works very well for us.

 

[mshanson3121]

That doesn't mean she should take away from vacation funds for her whole family to satisfy her Disney wants, either.

While most people here are truly Disney fanatics, the reality is that most people do not have the funds for separate vacations from the rest of their family, nor the desire to vacation without them.

Yup. This 100%. We have the budget for one family vacation. And no way would I ever take away from that just to satisfy my own Disney urge. And, also, no, I do not want to vacation without my family.

 

[ELSA711]

What did you do so exciting in New Hamsphire? Would love to have an alternative to at least discuss with my family as well. I love WDW, would go multiple times a year if I could but I would love to hear about other 'must dos' for a fraction of the cost you say?

 

[PerfessorZ]

I think what hasn't happened here is any sort of compromise or even a full discussion with your husband yet. Since you didn't even realize how important Disney is to you, it's hard to imagine he knew. And since it is something important to you (and not just the kids), I think you need to tell him that and work on a compromise together. Maybe your trip next June can be shelved for a bit, but there should be a mutually agreed upon date when you will return that's before the next summer Olympics!

That said, since the transportation seems to be the biggest hurdle to affording more frequent vacations, game-planning for a low-cost way to get to Orlando should be your next goal. Driving is time-consuming, but generally a lot cheaper than flying. Our first two Disney vacations were road trips from NY - close to 24 hrs of driving. Somehow I ended up being the driver for every mile down and back both times, but it was still worth it to me. Our next trip in November is entirely covered by SW bonus miles from signing up for their credit cards. I'm not sure what deals you might be eligible for, but stalking some frequent flyer sites could help you figure out the best way to get cheap or possibly free flights down.

Good luck!

 

[mshanson3121]

What did you do so exciting in New Hamsphire? Would love to have an alternative to at least discuss with my family as well. I love WDW, would go multiple times a year if I could but I would love to hear about other 'must dos' for a fraction of the cost you say?

Story Land and Santa's Village were the two parks we did this time. The kids loved them, and they're very cheap ($30 a day, free parking, and if you arrive within 3 hours of close, you get a pass for another full day, free, or just get a season pass for $70). Santa's Village includes a nice water park with 6 water slides and a large water activity center, so we did the "arrive during the last 3" thing - Day 1 we spent a few hours at the water park, then got our pass, and went back for another full day. Story Land is better themed/maintained than Santa's Village, but the kids enjoyed both places. There are so many things to do in NH. You can buy a value pass that includes admission to all 17 attractions for 2 people for only $350. We also did some hiking while we were there, and planned on doing a river tubing adventure but got rained out. We stayed at a campground and rented a nice trailer for only $95 a night. But you can get any type of lodging you want in the White Mountains. We only spent 3 nights this time, but when we talked about going back next year, we figured on staying probably 10 nights. We can do 10 days in NH with the value pass for roughly half the cost of 10 days at Disney.

 

[mshanson3121]

I think what hasn't happened here is any sort of compromise or even a full discussion with your husband yet. Since you didn't even realize how important Disney is to you, it's hard to imagine he knew. And since it is something important to you (and not just the kids), I think you need to tell him that and work on a compromise together. Maybe your trip next June can be shelved for a bit, but there should be a mutually agreed upon date when you will return that's before the next summer Olympics!

That said, since the transportation seems to be the biggest hurdle to affording more frequent vacations, game-planning for a low-cost way to get to Orlando should be your next goal. Driving is time-consuming, but generally a lot cheaper than flying. Our first two Disney vacations were road trips from NY - close to 24 hrs of driving. Somehow I ended up being the driver for every mile down and back both times, but it was still worth it to me. Our next trip in November is entirely covered by SW bonus miles from signing up for their credit cards. I'm not what deals you might be eligible for, but stalking some frequent flyer sites could help you figure out the best way to get cheap or possibly free flights down.

Good luck!

We already do all that Drive, rewards, picnic meals etc... Trust me when I say, I have squeezed every penny out of our budget and there is no way we can get to Disney cheaper, short of camping along the roadside instead of sleeping in a motel (and even then we used discount coupons, and chose places that offered free breakfast, lol).

 

[ELSA711]

Story Land and Santa's Village were the two parks we did this time. The kids loved them, and they're very cheap ($30 a day, free parking, and if you arrive within 3 hours of close, you get a pass for another full day, free, or just get a season pass for $70). Santa's Village includes a nice water park with 6 water slides and a large water activity center, so we did the "arrive during the last 3" thing - Day 1 we spent a few hours at the water park, then got our pass, and went back for another full day. Story Land is better themed/maintained than Santa's Village, but the kids enjoyed both places. There are so many things to do in NH. You can buy a value pass that includes admission to all 17 attractions for 2 people for only $350. We also did some hiking while we were there, and planned on doing a river tubing adventure but got rained out. We stayed at a campground and rented a nice trailer for only $95 a night. But you can get any type of lodging you want in the White Mountains. We only spent 3 nights this time, but when we talked about going back next year, we figured on staying probably 10 nights. We can do 10 days in NH with the value pass for roughly half the cost of 10 days at Disney.

Thanks! I'll look into those. We are looking into Bar Harbor Maine as well so maybe we can do both next summer.

 

[mshanson3121]

Thanks! I'll look into those. We are looking into Bar Harbor Maine as well so maybe we can do both next summer.

Definitely, they're only about 3 hours apart. Bar Harbor is beautiful. If you're looking for typical kids attractions you won't find them. But if you're looking for nature, sightseeing, beaches etc... you'll be in luck! They have a really great Pirate's Cove mini golf place, too.

 

[ELSA711]

Definitely, they're only about 3 hours apart. Bar Harbor is beautiful. If you're looking for typical kids attractions you won't find them. But if you're looking for nature, sightseeing, beaches etc... you'll be in luck! They have a really great Pirate's Cove mini golf place, too.

Thanks! We are looking for just a national park and beauty!! Maybe sign up for a lobster boat excursion I always hear about.

 

[megster1123]

OP--have you followed Dave Ramsey at all? In your budget the family vacation should be a separate fund from household repairs. You shouldn't steal from one to fund the other.

Following DR is the reason why we were able to pay with our upcoming trip with cash

Edit - not trying to gloat or make the OP feel badly, just wanted to chime in that, while not for everyone, Dave Ramsey really does have a strategy that is pretty much life changing.

 

[bumbershoot]

as he pointed out, there are other things we could do with the money saved, things we'd like to do around the house.

I hope you make sure that happens. That sort of plan so often goes awry.

That doesn't mean she should take away from vacation funds for her whole family to satisfy her Disney wants, either.

While most people here are truly Disney fanatics, the reality is that most people do not have the funds for separate vacations from the rest of their family, nor the desire to vacation without them.

Maxiesmom wasn't referring to a solo trip. She was offering a suggestion on budgeting in case the OP hadn't done it yet.




If people don't want their spouses heavily judged or for people to worry about the relationship, they shouldn't report their spouse telling them "we are NOT going".



I get that some people don't really believe that those on the other end of the Internet are real and therefore don't care about them, some of us DO care and put worries and thoughts towards others. We hear an ultimatum like that and out hackles are raised!!!

 

[monorailrabbit]

OP, I'm so sorry to hear this! DH is kind of "over" Disney World too, a lot of the magic seems to be getting sacrificed for more $$ and it's kind of sucking the fun out of it for him. However, he knows I live for my Disney trips, so he would never just decide we are done. Rather instead of World, we did Land for the first time ever, found that it was more cost effective (cheaper flight, was huge) and, in a lot of aspects, more enjoyable! We loved the nostalgia factors happening there, and it was such a different and welcome change from World. Granted we missed Epcot (that's always been our favorite) but Disneyland just blew us away! Would Land be an option for you? Still getting a Disney fix, just in a different way!

 

[Dentam]

OP, I'm so sorry to hear this! DH is kind of "over" Disney World too, a lot of the magic seems to be getting sacrificed for more $$ and it's kind of sucking the fun out of it for him. However, he knows I live for my Disney trips, so he would never just decide we are done. Rather instead of World, we did Land for the first time ever, found that it was more cost effective (cheaper flight, was huge) and, in a lot of aspects, more enjoyable! We loved the nostalgia factors happening there, and it was such a different and welcome change from World. Granted we missed Epcot (that's always been our favorite) but Disneyland just blew us away! Would Land be an option for you? Still getting a Disney fix, just in a different way!

That's a great point, and we really love the California Adventure park there!

 

[topiney]

Thanks! I'll look into those. We are looking into Bar Harbor Maine as well so maybe we can do both next summer.

We love Acadia National Park, which surrounds Bar Harbor. My grandchildren ages 10 and 8 can spend hours in the tide pools. They also have a great boat exploration, Diver Ed's Dive in Theater (you can look up on line) which the kids really enjoyed. We have gone there every year for the past 5 years and are still finding new things to do. This is definitely an outdoorsy kind of vacation for the most part. Hope you get to to and that you enjoy it!

 

[mikedoyleblogger]

I'm sorry. I know my husband is the primary wage-earner and when things are stressful at work, it's a lot for him. He feels pressure from work, obviously, but also because he has financially support us completely and worries about what would happen if his job was cut. We tried the same thing - let's do some non-Disney vacations, save $ etc... and in some cases it was great, but in others, we actually found that the financial savings/difference wasn't worth it. I'd happily try a longer NH trip for now - especially since you said you see the point and $ savings and just put Disney on the back burner for a year or two.

My partner is the primary wage-earner as well. And that doesn't give him the right to make unilateral decisions, and he doesn't make them. Just because you may not be the primary breadwinner does not mean your opinion on household expenditures is any less than equal. That's how loving each other enough to be spouses is supposed to work. Not, "It's my money and I said no."

 

[GPC0321]

Your disappointment is understandable. There are lots and lots of fantastic places all over the world to visit and enjoy, but none of them are like Disney World. And it's not everyone's cup o' tea either. But for those who love it, it's really hard to find somewhere else that fits the bill when you're yearning for Disney. Sure, kids, especially young ones, will have just as much fun at a less expensive (and distant) place. Heck, how many people talk about how their kid's favorite part of Disney is playing in the pool at the resort? Kids are easy, and for that reason, the vacation destination should truly be somewhere the parents enjoy.
That said, saving money to put to another use is totally understandable too. Like others here, I kind of snarled at the WAY your husband completely shut you down about Disney, but that's not my business. You seem to agree with him when all is said and done, so that's good. It doesn't stop you from feeling the disappointment, and that's okay.
You'll get back to WDW if you really want to some day. I had a 17 year gap between my last trip and the one before it, and we've already got a December 2017 trip in the works to check off a bucket list item of seeing Disney at Christmastime (while also celebrating my mom's 75th birthday)! If I can swing it, I'll be back every year.
So *hugs* to you, OP. I'd be disappointed too. But you'll get back there when the time is right. 2019 isn't THAT far away. It's not like your husband has forbidden you from ever going again. And maybe by that time, with the kids a bit older and more aware of the awesomeness of Disney, and the new parts of the parks up and running, the experience WILL seem worth it to your husband.