OT: Why do you homeschool?

[VSL]

Just subscribing so I can read this later!

I'm only 20 and not even engaged yet, but homeschooling my future children is definitely something I'm interested in!

 

[Brier Rose]

Ok, but if I called you that, it would be a compliment :

Then as long as you're doing the name calling...I'm honored!

It's funny, when you're promoting a politically correct worldview, it's education, when you are promoting traditional values, it's indoctrination, or brainwashing. Ever notice that?

I love the way you put that! It's so true.

 

[estherhead]

Remember:
"It takes a viking to raze a village"

My BIL, who homeschools his kids, but is pro "education" and working right now on his PhD says that the idea that you actually could isolate your children from the world today is crazy. There is news, the internet, TV, radio. It would take a tremendous talent and an awfully driven person to completely shelter their child from it. But I can shelter them from cruelty towards them, from predjudices I'd rather them not acquire, and from some dangerous situations.

I don't really want to totally shelter my kids and I do believe that adversity builds character. But I also think there is a difference between taking them to a wall of the Vietnam war and letting them imagine the world view of terror, than them living in Iraq right now. The men and women currently in Iraq will be forever changed. Some perhaps for the better, some for the worse. But who of us just wishes that it was our kid over there?

So though I want them to know the dangers of the world, I want them to understand evil people are out there and could molest them, I want them to know what to do in case of a fire, to know about drugs, etc... I don't want them to actually be in a fire or do drugs or be molested.

Any parent who says they DON'T want to shelter their child is just talking without thinking because all parents shelter their kids. We get them out of swimming pools when it is thundering, we put boots and coats on them in the winter, we hold their hands to cross the street.

Not that I think PS are terrible, far from it. In fact, I was never offered drugs at my school. For the most part I believe my school, and the current local school around me is safe and the teachers I've had the privelage to meet are wonderful and very concerned with safety. But if a parent were in another situation where this was not the case, where weapons were brought to school or there were gangs, or whatever other dangers we all know exist, who are any of us to judge a parent making sure their child's physical, emotional, & mental well-being is secure and safe?

No flames from me.

 

[nuzmom]

BrierRose: I, too, struggle with how to say that I'm "protecting" my children - "sheltering"? I guess so, but I'm glad you said it first. Why are we hesitant to say that, like it's so wrong? Don't all parents do "shelter" to some extent? Don't parents choose the TV and movies our kids see and the clothes we buy for them, etc.

Why is it wrong to have my child go to school where the rules are clear cut, behavior is respectful, being judgemental and rude is NOT excepted, with personalized, individual acedemics taught by a person who cares more about that child than anyone else, and where their foundation is based on solid morals. Why do people feel it's wrong for the PARENTS to decide what best for THEIR children?

DreadpiratK: "We abdicated our responsibility to teach our children how to behave, and what to believe, and let the schools do it. Now they are so busy teaching these things, they can't educate anymore." So true. I am NOT giving the schools that responsibility anymore!!!

I find it funny that HSers are critized for not having their kids in public schools, but if the public schools functioned as they did 100 years ago, those doing the complaining would be pulling their children out. You know, their feelings are that public schools shouldn't be imparting (other peoples) values onto their children. (let alone slanting History) Hmmmm.

OT - Does anyone ever feel that they took the "easy" way out? What I mean is, my best friend has 3 wonderful children, but she has to work so hard to combat what they go through at school. It's a continual battle for her and it's very hard. Aside from the moral issues, she has 2 girls that struggle in some subjects and excel in others. The extra time she spends because they have to go at the class's pace is crazy. The amount of homework is crazy, too. Instead of her kids developing a love for learning, they're sitting on the bench at softball games trying to get their homework done. Other kids are running around and playing. And this is in subjects that the kids clear understand, it's just "busy work". Trust me, it's not because the school is great, either. I think some teachers just "believe" in a lot of homework. Anyway, I know there are many times that I feel that I spend all of my time on home schooling, but sometimes I think it is easier than "fighting" what I would have to deal with with public school.

Thanks for the great posts. I love this thread.

 

[meandtheguys2]

I not only feel that I have taken the "easy way out", but the "fun way out."

 

[nuzmom]

I not only feel that I have taken the "easy way out", but the "fun way out."

Oh, phew, I thought it was just me But, shhhh, don't tell eveyone that homeschooling is "fun" - if kids are having fun, then when is the learning taking place?

 

[LegoMom3]

I want to thank each and every one of you who responded here!...it was refreshing to me to read all your replies. We've been HSing for a couple years and this summer I have just felt SO burnt out and not looking forward to starting again, to the point that I've been trying to talk myself out of continuing....
This was just the boost I needed!

THANK YOU!

 

[Brier Rose]

I not only feel that I have taken the "easy way out", but the "fun way out."

DITTO!!

One day when I was grocery shopping, I ran into one of DD's teacher aids from when she attended private school who proceeded to try and convince me to send her back.

I told her we were just having too much fun homeschooling and were really enjoying it so far. She just looked at me like I had two heads!

Imagine having FUN with school!! What a concept!

Every year at this time when school starts I feel such a relief that we don't have all of the anxiety associated with starting an "anybodies guess" school year. No luck of the draw here!

We know what to expect. We know she'll love all her classes, because she helped pick them out. We know she won't get bullied, or pressured to do things she shouldn't, or worry about making the "right" friends. And of course we know she'll love her teacher!

To me homeschooling is just taking the what's good about school...the best of education, the field trips, the "class" parties, the sports. I mean we still DO all that stuff. Even a yearbook! We still have EVERYTHING that any child going to "real" school has, we've just erased all of the negetives!

There is nothing the school year brings now but learning, new activites to participate in, and new friends made along the way.

Some may call that sheltering or unrealistic. I call it DARN LUCKY!

Thank you all for getting me so pumped up for another great school year!
Ya'll are great!

 

[rchristiansen]

Many of you had concerns about the Political Correctness and lack of gifted programs at Public Schools. I went to a Lutheran school from PreK to 12th grade. I have the same concerns as my nearly 3 year old is starting to show an interest in reading already (We're way past the learning our numbers, letters, colors stage).

I've had a fleeting thought about homeschooling, but I know I do not have the energy to do it. Also I enjoyed going to school and I know my DD loves the interaction with other kids.

However, did any of you research the Private Schools or Christian Schools?There is a very good one just down the street from me that she can start in First Grade. It's smaller and I'm thinking that might be my best alternative....Of course I will never have any money ever again, but I think it would be worth it.

 

[nuzmom]

rchristiansen: yes, at the time of our original decision, I did consider a Christian school, but it just isn't close to our home at all and the commute would have been very difficult to deal with. You're right in that homeschooling does take energy (and lots of organizational skills), but we are very pleased with our decision. If a Christian school would "pop up" closer to us, I wouldn't change what we do. Anyway, IMHO, if you have one that's right across the street from you, go check it out. See what they have to offer and it just might be the perfect match for you. Best wishes to you and your DD.

 

[Brier Rose]

However, did any of you research the Private Schools or Christian Schools?There is a very good one just down the street from me that she can start in First Grade. It's smaller and I'm thinking that might be my best alternative....Of course I will never have any money ever again, but I think it would be worth it.

My DD attended at Private School before we started homeschooling.

We liked the school very much, we just like homeschooing a lot better!

 

[geetey]

This is a very interesting thread and I really appreciate everyone's posts. It is great to read!

OT - Does anyone ever feel that they took the "easy" way out? What I mean is, my best friend has 3 wonderful children, but she has to work so hard to combat what they go through at school. It's a continual battle for her and it's very hard. Aside from the moral issues, she has 2 girls that struggle in some subjects and excel in others. The extra time she spends because they have to go at the class's pace is crazy. The amount of homework is crazy, too. Instead of her kids developing a love for learning, they're sitting on the bench at softball games trying to get their homework done. Other kids are running around and playing. And this is in subjects that the kids clear understand, it's just "busy work". Trust me, it's not because the school is great, either. I think some teachers just "believe" in a lot of homework. Anyway, I know there are many times that I feel that I spend all of my time on home schooling, but sometimes I think it is easier than "fighting" what I would have to deal with with public school.

Thanks for the great posts. I love this thread.

I know exactly what 'battle' you are referring to, Nuzmom, but I don't feel that I have the skills that would allow me to teach my children at home, so I keep doing the battle - homework, reteaching subjects at home, conferences with teachers. We interviewed a lot of schools before moving to this area, chose the best school possible, but an individual teacher can still 'make or break' a school year. I have entertained the idea of homeschooling for years, but after researching, I am *more* timid about trying it.

I do applaud all of the homeschoolers!

 

[Jesuslover]

"And these words which I command yu today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you set in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up."--Deuteronomy 6:6-7

God wrote these words to the Isrealites and He has spoken them to me. For my family, I need time to teach my children the Bible. Homeschooling gives me that time. We don't hate the PS--My DH is a high school biology teacher at the public school in our town--, but for us, the flexibility of homeschooling allows us to focus on godly things.

We are more socialized than I would like--co-ops, ballet, cross country team, baseball, but I LOVE the fact that my DS10 doesn't get the dirty jokes and that he would rather hang out with his dad than anything in the world.

Educationally, it is the way to go. Most homeschoolers I know start college at 15 or 16. My son was a born thinker (he reads encyclopedias for fun), and homeschooling allows us to let him learn at a faster pace. We also have a DD6 who is struggling to read. As long as she can read well by 9 or 10, she will be fine because we are in no hurry.

To those of you considering this option-- This is the MOST FUN I have ever had. Every day is an adventure ( even when we are doing our math and language books).--NOT TO MENTION DISNEY IN SEPTEMBER!!

 

[Carrie Ellis]

Well this will be my second year hs my twin 8 year old boys (soo to be 9 on August 30th!)!! I lovvvvvvvvve it! They lovvvvvvvvvvve it!

I was spending 2 hours each evening helping them catch up and do homework. Now we add some hours to that and we are done before dads home! The boys are in hs PE at the YMCA, iceskating, piano, etc.... I could have never done all the extras if they were in ps because we just would not have time.

When the boys were in 2nd grade ps, one of them woke up one morning and told me his stomach muscles hurt. Boys just don't describe pain well so it seems like I am guessing like I had too when my kids were infants. I assumed it was the situps that they were making them do in PE at school. They do not do them right. They make them do it the old fashion way that is not good on your back. Anyway, I sent a note to the teacher asking if he could refrain from PE for just that day because I was not sure why his stomach muscles hurt. He was not running a fever that morning. She sent me a full page in his cubby notes how it required by law that students do what is required by the presidential physical....bla bla bla. He stepped off the bus with over 103 temp that day. I was so angry! It was like I had no say in my child's life. There are so many other situations that I will not bore everyone with but there are some crazy things now that parents have very little control over when their children are in ps.

Don't even get me started on the meals they serve children. I work with the school lunch program in DC and it is a shame.

I have read recently that it against the law for teachers to mention God in class in the state of MD???? It was last year around Thanksgiving. It said that teachers could not state why the pilgrims had a feast offering thanks, or to whom they were offering thanks to because it is against the law??? To me it is very sad. I look back at my old school programs from elementary and winter break was called Christmas break. I am not a radical Christian but I do believe that we should not have to hide facts about our religion not to hurt others.

Anyway!!! off my box and just wanted to really say that we are lucky to have options in our country!

 

[DianeV]

PLEASE dont take this wrong..its just a question or maybe a partial observation..

do you think that more religious people (those that call themselves Christians for example) tend to homeschool then those who are your average church going person (like Catholics or Jewish etc)

For some reason most of the homeschoolers I have come across around here are "Christians" and quite religious. I am just wondering if that seems to be the case and if so why do you think so?

I sure hope this didnt come across wrong, I dont want to offend anyone!

 

[TinkerbellMama]

There is a very large atheist homeschooling community. Some people do it for religious reasons, at least in part, and some do it for reasons having absolutely nothing to do with religion, as they do not even believe in god.

I wanted to add that in addition to all of the wonderful reasons mentioned by others on this thread, we intend to homeschool because I am far better qualified to facilitate my son's learning than the vast majority of teachers. Don't get me wrong...I know that most teachers are caring, dedicated, intelligent individuals. But I have a graduate degree and I am a SAHM...and all of my resources including time, knowledge base, and money are going to be focused on educating my own children. No teacher can match that! At best he or she would have a limited budget (or none at all!) and has to divide his or her attention among 20-30 children. Also, he or she cannot match the level of understanding I will develop regarding my child's learning style and ability level. It's just not possible to know so many children as well as their parents in a few short months! And of course even the most outstanding teacher can never have the same amount of concern for my child's education as I do...again, it's just not possible! I applaud teachers who are out there everyday trying to make a difference, often under very stressful conditions. But in our case, it makes no sense to send my son off to get what would undoubtedly be an inferior education, even though all parties involved would mean well!


Edited to add: By no means do I believe a college education is necessary to effectively homeschool one's children. Studies have shown no difference in children's performance based on parental education level. However, for us it's just another factor in the decision to homeschool, that I do have the academic background.

 

[Amii]

PLEASE dont take this wrong..its just a question or maybe a partial observation..
do you think that more religious people (those that call themselves Christians for example) tend to homeschool then those who are your average church going person (like Catholics or Jewish etc)

For some reason most of the homeschoolers I have come across around here are "Christians" and quite religious. I am just wondering if that seems to be the case and if so why do you think so?

We are not religious at all. Most of the homeschool families I know are not very religious either. There are many different reasons to homeschool. Religion is just one of them.

I homeschool my kids for several reasons. Both my kids are extremely creative, and I believe that will take them far in life. Public school was squashing all of their creativity. Also, my school district bases everything they teach around the MCAS tests. They put tremendous pressure on the kids to learn what will be on the MCAS tests so the district will look good. The kids have no time to learn anything else while in school. I do not believe this type of teaching will prepare a child for life.

Most of public school learning is memorization to pass a test. The kids cram info into their brains long enough to take a test and then it is gone. My kids learn about what they are interested in and they remember what they learn. They have learned to love learning. I feel that will take them farther in life than a good MCAS score.

Finally, I love being around my kids. I love to watch them learn and grow. Life and childhood is short. I want to take advantage of the time I have.

Amii

 

[estherhead]

I actually think it is a misperception that "a lot" of people homeschool for one reason or another, like religion. It's my opinion that people who feel very, very strongly about their convictions, whatever they are, speak with passion. This makes it seem like there are more of them, because they are louder and more persistent. Right-wing Christians are not a quiet group. But that doesn't necessarily mean they are a majority. I do think there are a lot of Americans who teach some Bible training in their homeschooling courses, but they would teach this if their kids were in PS too. Just like an atheist parent would teach their child their belief system whether PS or HS. We're parents. It's our job to fulfill our kids' needs and one of those is a spiritual need, a need to belong, a need to understand why we are here and what our purpose is in life. No PS can fulfill that. They aren't allowed and it isn't their job.

 

[DreadpiratK]

PLEASE dont take this wrong..its just a question or maybe a partial observation..

do you think that more religious people (those that call themselves Christians for example) tend to homeschool then those who are your average church going person (like Catholics or Jewish etc)

For some reason most of the homeschoolers I have come across around here are "Christians" and quite religious. I am just wondering if that seems to be the case and if so why do you think so?

I sure hope this didnt come across wrong, I dont want to offend anyone!

Asking a sincere question is never offensive, except to people who are afraid of the answers!

Historically speaking, I think you are correct to an extent. 25 years ago, when the homeschool movement was in it's infancy, the majority, (but definately not all) of homeshoolers did so for religious, generally conservative Christian, reasons. As popular awareness has grown, more and more people from all kinds of philisophical backgrounds have begun to homeshool for thier own reasons. There have even been families that homeschooled because the PS are too 'Christian oriented' . (I guess it's all a mater of perspective!).

As the anti-Christian, anti-religious bias continues to grow in public schools, (Can't sing Christmas carols, 'winter break', ect. Can't even mention as a historical fact the faith of the men who founded our country. How about not being able to mention for what, or too whom the Pilgrims gave thanks at Thanksgiving? Apparently they were just a bunch of atheists in funny clothes ) Christians certainly have more reason to homeshool than others, over and above the qualitative problems with the PS's.

Opinion: I think that Christians were the first people, because of our world view, to see the flaws in the secular humanistic philosophy that has ruled the PS for so long. As this philosophy has grown and progressed in the PS, the negative results of it have become plain to many people, Christian or otherwise, and so we see the rapid spread of homeshooling among those without strong religious faith. They may not necesarily disagree with the philosophy, but they don't want thier children to suffer it's repercussions.

 

[DianeV]

I have noticed that these changes in public schools regarding God etc. are most times brought about by those who are atheist or do not feel that belongs in public school and therefore put pressure on the schools. Case in point, the dad who supposedly didnt like his child having to say "under God" in the pledge of allegiance.

I dont think you can really blame the schools for these kinds of changes. They have complaints from people, they have the ACLU who get their nose involved in anything and everything and have to end up caving under pressure.

I have a feeling had these kinds of things not started happening you wouldnt see these things and be able to feel that way at least about public schools.

I do take my kids to catechism so they get their religous education as these days I just know not to expect that at school unless I enroll them in a religious based school. We are Catholic and pretty middle of the road

Edited to add a question: We have neighbors who are Christian and they told my daughter that we are not Christians. I dont know where this all came from and the history of calling your particular religion Christian as I was always taught that Christians are those who believe in Christ and that includes Catholic, Methodist, Episcopalian etc. I have always been under the impression that Christian is category per se and Catholic etc were sub categories per se. Cant figure any other way to explain it! We were a bit put off when this girl told my daughter that and gave her the impression that we were "inferior" to her because we are Catholic. Does anyone know why this is the case or was this an isolated incident?