OT: Reminder to keep them safe (SCARY/LONG)

[beautybelle]

Thank goodness everything turned out OK. I felt very sorry for you for your experience while reading your post. Im sorry your family had to go through that even though it turned out to be good news. God Bless your family.

 

[liveforthemagic]

You should consider yourself double-y blessed...

1) It was a false alarm and your DD has been protected from any trauma surrounding the incident

2) You have received a warning call that many folks never get--as evidenced from the posts on this thread.

I thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing all that you learned.

I have been struggling with what I call "parent pressure" to give my DD(7) freedoms and responsibilities that I don't feel it is safe to do given this day and age. (And I also live in a lovely, middle to upper class suburband niefhborhood.) But you just never know.

As a result of your thread, I am sticking to my guns. If I don't feel comfortable with a situation, it is not happening. My new philosophy is go ahead, and call me the overprotective dork of the neighborhood. When I can safely send my DD off to college knowing that her childhood was not marred in this way, it will all be worth it.

ps--You cannot feel guilty about this. Just reading your thread brought tears to my eyes--I can only imagine how many tears you have shed over this incident. You make decisions based on the information you have. Now that you have more information, you will make different decisions. Its as simple as that.

Now. I gotta go do carpool...and hug my DD and DS. Everybody else should do the same!

 

[Nini]

I am happy to hear that your dd is doing well and was not harmed. I feel that you handled the situation appropriately and privately.

Two individuals (both male) dear to me were approached/molested as young boys. One was my brother who was approached by a man at a local shopping mall. We were with my mother and had stopped in a corner store. Long story short, my brother was waiting in the atrium area right outside of the store. When he came directly into the store and told me (I think I was about 12 and he was 11) what had happened and that he really wanted to leave (he was embarassed to tell our mother). I told my mother that we needed to leave right away and what happened. Needless to say she was upset and alarmed!!! We left the mall immediately as there was no man lingering around to report on (AND it was over 20 years ago!!).

The other was molested by a "family friend" of his older brothers. It happened one night when they stayed over. The "friend" fondled him and asked if he would like to "do more". He NEVER went back to that "family friends" house and told me that he would find excuses not to go (a ton of pressure for a kid). It has left deep emotional scars. Again, this man never told his mother because of embarassment.

I always try to keep an open line of communication with my child dd3. I want her to be able to confide in me about anything!!! I agree wholly with the other posters, you just cannot be too careful.

So happy for you & your family that it turned out to be a false alarm! We are our childs advocates and it is our responsibility to keep them safe.

 

[ksoehrlein]

As a result of your thread, I am sticking to my guns. If I don't feel comfortable with a situation, it is not happening. My new philosophy is go ahead, and call me the overprotective dork of the neighborhood.

I'm now an even more "overprotective dork" than I had been before our scare. It's a little hard for me, because my own mother had been extremely overprotective (read: "smothering") as a result of her anxiety disorder and I had always vowed to never do that to my own kids. But as I explained to DH on the way home from the ER, my mother never let me do anything, but then again, I never went to the ER as a child. We parents just have to find a balance, I guess.

DD and I have had several long talks lately about why we have rules for her (and why there are suddenly more of them); it's just another way to tell her that we love her and don't want anything bad to happen to her. She loves the logic and has actually begged me to make a new rule for her every now and then so she can "hear" me say "I love you." I took it a step further and told her that when she obeys those rules, that's a way she can tell us she loves us. It seems to be working.

Thanks everyone for your kind words. I wish all the best for you and your families as well.