OT: How many to invite to birthday party? RSVP's?

[tchrchgo]

I was hoping to pick the brains of those who have recently thrown birthday parties for any primary age kids?

I am throwing a combined party for my two kdg boys, so I have to condense 2 classes of kids into one party. I want to keep the party to 18 or less kids iin attendance. Last year I invited 20 and 12 came, but only after I called to find out if they were coming, no one actually rsvp'd.

This yr I am going off the kdg list which does not include phone numbers, and some people are unlisted so I won't be able to follow up if they don't rsvp.

I am not sure how many to actually invite to achieve my goal of 18 or less. With my friends' kids and their very close friends and themselves, we have a guaranteed 8 kids. So I would want to have about 7-8 kids attend out of those invited. If I invite an additional 20 kids, is that too many or not enough to insure about 8 extra kids? I am concerned that I will invite too many and they will actually come, or I will not invite enough and we'll end up with just the 8, which actually would be okay I guess.

Anyone, I would love to hear back from people as to how many total kids they invited, how many spontaneous rsvp's they got, and how many kids actually attended.

Thanks!

 

[HomeAlone]

I think it is different by location, but here almost all invited come and almost NO ONE RSVPs. The only time I had a lot of RSVPs was when I didn't include directions to the location, on purpose, and no one knew where it was!

Maybe invite 15 and it will just be a small party if most do not attend. If I'm not inviting the whole class I make sure to only invite kids that I hear their names a lot from my birthday child. They are more likely to show if they usually play with your kid at school.

Good Luck!

 

[ceecee]

In Kindergarden, DD got invited to a party a week! Kids she didn't even know, some parents just sent invitations to be passed out in class, I helped in her classroom and the teacher was less than thrilled to play postman! One time a boy only wanted to pass them out to his friends, the teacher said take them home and ask your mom to mail them (no hurt feelings that way). I started asking her if they were kids she actually played with at school? I would just invite the boys from each of the classes and don't expect RSVPs a LOT of people just don't. The other option if you want an exact number, is just to invite the boy's friends and call each one or mail the invitation. Really why bother inviting a class unless your kids are friends with all of them. I've heard a guest per age of child for a manageable party. Bigger ones are fine if you're doing Chuckie Cheese or something.

 

[WendyisDarling]

Here, everyone RSVP's. I mail the invitations, though and give a RSVP no later than date. I don't know if that makes a differnce or not.

Also, it depends upon where the party is or what kind of pary...if it is laser tag or pump it up (inflatable indoor jumping arena) almost all kids will attend--my experience. I wouldn't invite even one more child over what I planned to attend.

If there is no way you cannot accomodate the off chance that every single child you invite can attend, you shouldn't invite them, JMHO. I think if you invite 20, you very well may have more than your expected 7 or 8 in attendance. But, I believe the rule of thumb is the expectation that 2/3 of your invitation list will attend. If that is the case, invite 12 and perhaps 8 will attend, but I would be prepared for all 12--just in case.

Hope your kids have a great party.

ETA: Our school does not allow distribution of party invitations at school even if the whole class is invited. I like that policy.

 

[Mocharilla]

Truthfully, you won't get many RSVPs. I just did a party and I got 2 RSVPs. I had to call everyone else. It's always been that way.

I'd say just invite the people your kids are friends with. Ask each of them which kids they'd want to invite, and only invite those kids.

Definatly do the mailing thing, though. Like ceecee said, you don't want hurt feelings.

 

[lisaross]

Your one choice is to just invite kids outside of school and maybe each kid picks 1 from there class - if you want a real small party!

or, Just invite boys from each class

This is what i am doing - my kids are turning 6 and 8! I have about 6 kids from the outside whom i need to invite and then they will each invite about 10 kids from class.

I was hoping to pick the brains of those who have recently thrown birthday parties for any primary age kids?

I am throwing a combined party for my two kdg boys, so I have to condense 2 classes of kids into one party. I want to keep the party to 18 or less kids iin attendance. Last year I invited 20 and 12 came, but only after I called to find out if they were coming, no one actually rsvp'd.

This yr I am going off the kdg list which does not include phone numbers, and some people are unlisted so I won't be able to follow up if they don't rsvp.

I am not sure how many to actually invite to achieve my goal of 18 or less. With my friends' kids and their very close friends and themselves, we have a guaranteed 8 kids. So I would want to have about 7-8 kids attend out of those invited. If I invite an additional 20 kids, is that too many or not enough to insure about 8 extra kids? I am concerned that I will invite too many and they will actually come, or I will not invite enough and we'll end up with just the 8, which actually would be okay I guess.

Anyone, I would love to hear back from people as to how many total kids they invited, how many spontaneous rsvp's they got, and how many kids actually attended.

Thanks!

 

[disneyfanx3]

I have always invited both of my daughters classes and have never had more than 20 kids show up. I found it really depends on the party as to how many will show up. I have always found ways to have a nice party at a place that won't break the bank if everyone were to show up.

We can't mail invitations or call the kids as the school is not alowed to hand out phone numbers or addresses. For the most part only the ones whose parents call and RSVP have showed up.

 

[jeepgirl30]

It is really weird for us, DD7 has had 3 parties where we invited her friends from her class and the RSVP rate was horrible, absolutely horrible. DD5 has had 2 parties where we invited friends and we got almost 100% response (not all yes but almost everyone gave some response!)

I would invite only 20% over the number you want. Or work with the party center to have your date extended until closer to the party, 24 hrs or something.

Good luck!

 

[arielsleepingbeauty]

Inivitations are not allowed to be distributed in the classrooms unless everyone is invited. We get a school directory and people who want to post their phone numbers and address can so that it is easier to send out invitations. We used to just invite the girls from her class the last 2 years, but she doesn't play with them all so i find no need to invite them. Oldest DD is turning 8, her party is tomorrow. She invited 8 friends which are a group of girls that have been friends since preschool so i know the parents and dont worry about RSVP's because they are good about that. My youngest one is in Kindergarten and at that age when the friend birthday parties are just starting, the parents seem to be really bad about RSVPing. I always RSVP unless its noted to only do it if you AREN't going. I think its rude not to.

 

[EthansMom]

I don't invite more kids than I am actually willing to have attend... you never know when you'll get 100% of the kids who show up!

I'm lucky, our school publishes a directory of parents' phone numbers, addresses, and email addresses. Personally, I've learned to not invite someone if I don't know their phone number (after having to scramble to get a kid's number to doublecheck if she was coming). Now, I always plan to call the people I haven't heard from to check and see if their kid is coming... it's amazing the number of people who put the invitation in a pile somewhere and forget about it.

In your shoes, I'd invite only your kids' closest friends out of each class.

 

[javaj]

We expect a low RSVP/attendance rate for 6 yo DS' parties. I've noticed time of year makes a difference for us. 6 yo DS' birthday is in January, and we know many families that ski almost every weekend during the season. Plus his birthday is in early January, so we get invites out right before winter break, and I assume it often gets forgotten in the holiday shuffle.

For the last 3 years, we've invited between 28 to 32 kids from his school/child care centers, and we've always gotten 17 kids (plus the rude ones that bring their siblings and expect them to participate at a place like ChuckECheese or a trampoline party place).

We always ask for RSVP by 4 days before party date, but then expect about 1 straggler to RSVP each day after that, plus 1 that doesn't RSVP!

Plus with your Kindergarteners, they are now old enough that you can ask them which friends they really want to come -- and you can ask them to "ask" their favorite friends to mention needing to RSVP to their parents. That reminder worked pretty well with DS!

 

[tchrchgo]

Thanks for all the input- last yr we did not have anyone show up who had not rsvp'd- but I have trimmed the list to 20-22 kids, so any number up to that is acceptable.

Thanks again for all your help!