Operation Big Thunder: the Dole Whip Conspiracy COMPLETE

[Emma's Dad]

I know this is just a brief glance at the Yorktown, but it really was worth the time. How many chances do you get to walk on an aircraft carrier? The kids had a great time leading the explorations. I am amazed at how anyone could find their way around the maze of hallways. It's basically a city at sea--they have their own doctor's offices, dentist, machine shop, electrical shop, recreational areas...just a mind-boggling amount of detail went into building that ship. There's no wasted space. Check it out if you're ever in Charleston.

Coming Up Next: We're on a boat!

Thanks for the flashback, Mark! You're right about the aircraft carriers... they are huge! I served 4 years on the USS Dwight D Eisenhower and 3 years on the USS George Washington. Even after years on those ships I could always find something new to discover. This was a great side-trip to take!

 

[afwdwfan]

And now for something completely different.

Julie is going to write this update?

Speaking of which, what happened to her Disneyland TR she was going to write???

Ok, maybe not completely different. We were still at a Naval museum, after all. But after seeing the largest type of ship in the fleet, we were headed to tour the most cramped and claustrophobic: a submarine. The U.S.S. Clamagore, to be exact.

I got to go in that thing when I was probably about Sarah's age. It was frickin' cool!

On the way, we got a different view of the Yorktown. If you're at sea and you have this view, you might want to change course.

Or you may want to get a bigger boat.

Entering the Clamagore. Visual proof that my family can, and does, still sink to new depths each year.

Wait a minute. Is Barry writing this update for you?

Well...that's comforting.

Well, that is far more comforting than having a sign saying "If it's broke, you're swimming"

Hey, they expect and demand your very best. Anything less, you should have joined the Air Force.

I don't think I saw anyone get this one yet... Crimson Tide

We didn’t have time to explore the USS Laffey, which is a Destroyer on display.

LIE! How could you pass an opportunity to spend time around those guns?

Honestly, does anyone check these things?

And the tradition continues!

From there, we made perhaps the most important stop of the day: the gift shop.

That is definitely a lie... no way the gift shop is most important.

I love the warnings that were posted for our benefit. Anyway, after careful deliberation (i.e. I begged), the Budget Committee did approve the purchase of one of these babies. Now I can finally keep the kids in line. What do you think of that, Scotty?

No way! Ok, maybe this is the lie. Julie wouldn't let you buy a grenade. She's smarter than that.

 

[GoofyIsAsGoofyDoes]

OK… time to officially call out the lie in this one
(partly because it just occurred to me that this may only be a typo, in which case I’ll need to rethink it).

Fort Sumter is, of course, the place where the U.S. Civil War began. On April 11, 1861 a Confederate battery at nearby Fort Johnson (no longer exists) opened fire, and was joined by a garrison across the bay at Fort Moultrie. The battle lasted into the next day, when Fort Sumter caught on fire. Not having the manpower to both fight the Confederates and the blaze, the Union negotiated a surrender and were allowed to leave the fort, giving the Confederacy its first victory and joining the country in war for the next 4 years.

Buzzzzzz…
“Hostilities” commenced early the next morning on April 12th
(we live here… that one shows up on all the middle-school history tests).
The rest of it is spot on, but the date is off.



Or was that just a typo?

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

OK… time to officially call out the lie in this one
(partly because it just occurred to me that this may only be a typo, in which case I’ll need to rethink it).

Buzzzzzz…
“Hostilities” commenced early the next morning on April 12th
(we live here… that one shows up on all the middle-school history tests).
The rest of it is spot on, but the date is off.

Or was that just a typo?

I'll help you out on this one, because I like to get my facts straight. That is a typo. I had it stuck in my mind that April 11 was the date the war started, because I was going to poke fun at Scotty--his birthday is April 12--and I remember visiting the fort and thinking, "Oooh, just off by one." Yet every resource says the first shot was fired on April 12, so either I read something that was wrong or (more likely) I've wasted too many brain cells on movie quotes, and more important facts like these have been run through the shredder upstairs.

So, there's the answer. I'll edit the chapter. The lie is elsewhere.

 

[GoofyIsAsGoofyDoes]

That jumped out, but the more I thought about it, the more I suspected it had to be a typo. The first one to get it would then have everyone else following suit, so I decided I better ask about it.

OK…
New official Fib SWAG…

You could get a bit of a breeze if you stood outside, but given our sunburn, none of us were in the mood to stand in the sun.

I say you spent at least some time out in the open
(and no one else has called you one this one yet).

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Star Wars episode IV, A New Hope (ie. the original!)

+1

And now for something completely different.

Monty Python's Flying Circus. The correct response is: "A man with 3 buttocks"

+1

Lollipop guild = The Wizard of Oz

+1

She'll go all the way to the bottom = U-571

+1

Crazy Ivan = The Hunt for Red October

+1

If I'm wrong, then we're at war; God help us all = Crimson Tide

+1

Anything less, you should have joined the Air Force = Crimson Tide

+1

And Glenn comes roaring back into the contest with a vengeance! I knew we wouldn't be able to keep the previous champion down for long.

Yay, you're driving, not flying, so you get to buy a grenade!!

Great chapter. I love visiting Civil War sites.

They also had one already set up for my office. It had a #1 tab hooked to the pin and was labeled "Complaint Department. Please take a number."

I think Fort Sumter is a must-do if you're in Charleston. Too important historically to pass up, and a good experience for the kids.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Monty Python Flying Circus

Wizard of Oz

Got both of them, but Glenn was faster. I suggest trying to infect his computer with a virus.

Lie (the Dolphins, not the miserable ride).

You don't think dolphins would venture from the ocean into the bay, is that it?

That cannon picture makes me homesick for Tom Sawyer Island.

Sniff.

Tom Sawyer's Island is very underrated.

Nice warning on the grenades. Too funny. I'm actually surprised they sell them in a gift shop. Definitely a controversial item in some situations.

Well, they're hollowed out, empty and inert. But I'm sure that wouldn't prevent the TSA from getting freaked out over them. I could also have bought some .50 caliber bullets if I so desired.

I think Denny would really like to go out to Fort Sumpter. But that boat ride in the heat sounds unappealing. Fortunately, we will be going in March.

I bet March in SC is not bad at all, weather-wise.

Another great update and a nice family picture, too!

Thanks, Mary Ellen!

Truly nasty day at work and I’ve got a rehearsal to prep for this evening, so I’ll not be getting many of the quotes for this update.

Situations like these are why you try to build up a healthy lead in the first place.

I don’t think anyone picked up this quote back on the top of the last page:

“It’s not a matter of where he grips it…”

Monty Python and the Holy Grail

+1

How can you blame Darth for the wrong turn when you didn't even bring him?

Because the alternative is that I'm solely to blame for screwing up the directions, and we all know that can't happen.

The sub reminds me of the sub at Battleship park in Mobile and although there is no real air conditioner there is some air blowing in there.

We toured a German U-boat last summer in the Chicago Museum of Science & Industry (shameless plug alert: see "Rust Belt Road Trip" link below). According to the guide, temps routinely got up above 90 degrees in there...and the men wouldn't shower for 6 months at a time.

Fort Sumpter looked real cool, too bad the ride out there was so hot.

I think it's definitely worth seeing, no matter the circumstances.

My oldest also had to have one of those grenades and a bullet, both of which he still has. Both were purchased at the Battleship park so it must be common souvies at military parks.

Love Scotty's expression!

They certainly are unique souvenirs! I think they're pretty cool. At the very least, they make good conversation pieces.

Joining in !!! I live in South Carolina, so I have enjoyed seeing your posts about our area. Summers here aren't for sissies. This has been a pretty mild summer though. Looking forward to reading more.

We certainly didn't expect SC to be cool and comfortable in the middle of July. But that's why you head to the beach, right?

Das Boot (with subtitles)
The Boat (without)

+1

I wasn't sure if anyone would get that one, being a little more obscure.

By the way, it's a little-known unwritten Hollywood rule: Submarine movies are awesome.*


*Excepting Harrison Ford's K-19: The Widowmaker.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

I’m glad y’all got to see that one.
There was talk of it never being opened again and even being sunk as an artificial reef.

That would be a shame. Truth be told, it looked from the outside like they still had a big renovation task ahead of them.

Nope that would require a “double secret” level of clearance.

Exactly. Burn after reading.

Well, yah… if you don’t stop her…

but we can come up if we like to, right?

Well, I like to think we can, but then, I'm an incurable optimist.

30-degree down angle. Emergency blow!

Alex…
What is: because there ain’t enough room to store spare parts?

That would most certainly present a problem.

Nice!
As usual, y’all dress up a scene right nicely.
Well... most of ya’ anyway.

Sorry, I didn't have the time to Photoshop myself out.

I have a few pictures from a couple of months ago if you’re interested.

Or you could swim.

They do allow private boats (with a reservation I believe).
But obviously you’d have to have a boat handy.

All we had were boogie boards.

Last boat of the day?

No, but the next one was returning to Charleston. There wouldn't be another one from Patriots Point for another couple of hours.

I’d like to tour that park.
One of very many I’d like to see to be sure.

Definitely a battle with major significance.

It wouldn’t be an Oblivious TR without you stuffing your head into the muzzle of a gun at some point.

Truth.

[Annoying Trivia Mode - Activate]

“Huger”: pronounced: U-gee’
There are a hand full of names that show up on a number of streets, landmarks and even counties in this state that are pronounced a might strange, and that’s one of the most common.

That constitutes my annoying bit of trivia for this update.
Fell free to ignore.

[/Annoying Trivia Mode - Deactivate]

Do you have a button you push or something?

Disarmed hand grenade from a military souvenir shop: $15.00
Copious homeland security warnings related to hand grenades and airports: free
Photograph of young’en with said hand grenade: Prceless!

It does beat a t-shirt, doesn't it?

Ya’ know you’re just gonn’a have to come back now.

Sigh...twist my arm.

Well… you’re not completely off the mark.
If that CV’s captain had just rung up “All Full Back” on the telegraph and you just happened to be sitting in a smaller vessel at about that distance and location…

Then you might want to seriously consider skedaddleing

Abandon ship!

One of these days we are going to make it over to Charleston. I think it's only about 4 hours. It would be an easy weekend trip, but we just haven't done it yet.

Go! It's a beautiful city and worth the trip.

So, how craptastic do you have to be to get a bunk over the torpedo tubes? "Here you go, son. You'll be stuck in this big metal tube, underwater, for the next six months. Oh, and here's your bunk...right over the torpedo tubes. Have fun with that!"

It certainly takes a special type of person to serve on a sub crew. I don't think the bunks had anything to do with their performance so much as, "This is what we've got. Take it or leave it."

And now you've got me feeling all bad for Darth. You don't take him and he still gets blamed for leading you in the wrong direction? That's just wrong.

Lie: You blame Darth Vader for the wrong turn.

I find your lack of faith disturbing.

im saying that is the lie, i bet they were honored to serve even on a sub.

Hmmm...did I write "sailors" or "soldiers"?

 

[GoofyIsAsGoofyDoes]

New official Fib SWAG…



I say you spent at least some time out in the open
(and no one else has called you one this one yet).

Wait a second…
I’ve been aboard the “Spirit of Charleston” and honestly I just don’t remember it being that hot. Are you sure that there was no A/C? They use that boat form time to time to do dinner cruses and it seems unlikely that there would even consider asking folks to dress to the nines and then load them into a sweat box.


But I have been wrong before in my life.
Many, many times…

 

[GoofyIsAsGoofyDoes]

I find your lack of faith disturbing

Star Wars IV

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Thanks for the flashback, Mark! You're right about the aircraft carriers... they are huge! I served 4 years on the USS Dwight D Eisenhower and 3 years on the USS George Washington. Even after years on those ships I could always find something new to discover. This was a great side-trip to take!

aboard Don! And thanks for serving our country! Glad this brought back some good memories for you.

Julie is going to write this update?

Is that a request?

Speaking of which, what happened to her Disneyland TR she was going to write???

It wasn't Disneyland so much as the Rose Bowl Parade. But she got called in as a permanent long-term sub at my kids' school last spring and subsequently never really had the time to write it up. She's back subbing again this year so the bonus TR kind of fell by the wayside. Sorry about that.

I got to go in that thing when I was probably about Sarah's age. It was frickin' cool!

Or you may want to get a bigger boat.

Nice! +1

Wait a minute. Is Barry writing this update for you?

Oh, come on. It wasn't that bad, was it?

Well, that is far more comforting than having a sign saying "If it's broke, you're swimming"

At some point, it serves the same purpose as the floating seat cushions on an airplane.

I don't think I saw anyone get this one yet... Crimson Tide[?QUOTE]

Glenn spotted that one. I think all of the movie quotes have been spoken for.

LIE! How could you pass an opportunity to spend time around those guns?

Awful tempting, isn't it? But the Sumter tours did run on a tight schedule.

And the tradition continues!

That is definitely a lie... no way the gift shop is most important.

You haven't met my kids.

No way! Ok, maybe this is the lie. Julie wouldn't let you buy a grenade. She's smarter than that.

That jumped out, but the more I thought about it, the more I suspected it had to be a typo. The first one to get it would then have everyone else following suit, so I decided I better ask about it.

OK…
New official Fib SWAG…

I say you spent at least some time out in the open
(and no one else has called you one this one yet).

Duly noted. I wonder if I was watching any dolphins?

 

[GoofyIsAsGoofyDoes]

Burn after reading

this one actualy is a movie (and a weird one at that)
Burn After Reading

 

[GoofyIsAsGoofyDoes]

30-degree down angle. Emergency blow!

both of those lines have shown up in:
Red October

and in a number of other sub films (but not in the same paragraph)

Abandon ship!

Now that one has been uttered in more movies then can be counted
including by "Barf" in Spacesballs

and juist bringing that film up ought oto be worth a point.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Wait a second…
I’ve been aboard the “Spirit of Charleston” and honestly I just don’t remember it being that hot. Are you sure that there was no A/C? They use that boat form time to time to do dinner cruses and it seems unlikely that there would even consider asking folks to dress to the nines and then load them into a sweat box.

But I have been wrong before in my life.
Many, many times…

You sure are changing your mind an awful lot. Is this your final answer?

I did see another boat being used for harbor cruises. It was done up to look more like a big paddleboat (that was cosmetic, though). I don't know what the name of it was, but we passed it a couple of times to/from the fort.

Star Wars IV

+1

this one actualy is a movie (and a weird one at that)
Burn After Reading

+1

That was a weird one. Too weird for me, actually. I've never been much of a Coen Bros. fan. However, they did redeem themselves with the remake of True Grit.

 

[GoofyIsAsGoofyDoes]

Do you have a button you push or something?

Don't you wish...

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

both of those lines have shown up in:
Red October

and in a number of other sub films (but not in the same paragraph)

I'll give you +1 here because I was thinking of the scene where the USS Dallas draws away the torpedo and then surfaces to get out of the way.

Now that one has been uttered in more movies then can be counted
including by "Barf" in Spacesballs

and juist bringing that film up ought oto be worth a point.

Well...I was thinking of a specific movie here. Imagining the aircraft carrier vs. another vessel, as it were. It reminded me of a specific scene in another movie.

Don't you wish...

 

[GoofyIsAsGoofyDoes]

You sure are changing your mind an awful lot. Is this your final answer?

Hummm…
I may regret this but I'll stick with the middle one… “you didn’t stay in the cabin”,
because I have other reasons for citing it beyond my generally faulty memory.

That was a weird one. Too weird for me, actually. I've never been much of a Coen Bros. fan. However, they did redeem themselves with the remake of True Grit.

Must agree on both counts. There are a number of directors and producers that are critical darlings whose work just ain’t that entertaining. I like moves that allow me to escape from the oppression of life. As such, I only see about 4 or 5 a year. Critics tend to like films that make you feel bad (or angry… or confused…).

The retreatment of “True Grit”, however, was most excellent

 

[scholastica]

I love the warning to kids. Can't wait to hear more!

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Hummm…
I may regret this but I'll stick with the middle one… “you didn’t stay in the cabin”,
because I have other reasons for citing it beyond my generally faulty memory.

Duly noted. Hope you don't end up kicking yourself later...

Must agree on both counts. There are a number of directors and producers that are critical darlings whose work just ain’t that entertaining. I like moves that allow me to escape from the oppression of life. As such, I only see about 4 or 5 a year. Critics tend to like films that make you feel bad (or angry… or confused…).

Could not agree more. I'm not real interested in paying $12 a pop to experience angst and the human condition. I get plenty of that at home!

The retreatment of “True Grit”, however, was most excellent

Because it was (shh) entertaining.

I love the warning to kids. Can't wait to hear more!

Thanks for reading!

 

[Bridora]

New here and enjoying every minute of it! (And there were quite a few since I've read the whole thing now)