Old people & walking farts.

[wvjules]

I sometimes get the laughing farts. I'll try to sneak out a quite one. DBF will hear it so I will giggle and that starts the laughing farts. They sound just like walking farts but come quicker. I've also been known to have the walking farts as well and I'm only in my 30s. I'm just a gassy gal I guess.

 

[Silent1CB]

Ok, so you are saying they can't go to the bathroom & let them loose there? Or get them out? That's what I do. I think if you are standing in my kitchen, tooting away, then you can go to the bathroom.

I don't have walking farts, yet. But I do occasionally have yoga farts. That's what I call them. If kneeling & bending over to get something out from under the bed for instance. Yoga farts.

 

[Tiggernut_jadie]

Ok, so you are saying they can't go to the bathroom & let them loose there? Or get them out? That's what I do. I think if you are standing in my kitchen, tooting away, then you can go to the bathroom.

I don't have walking farts, yet. But I do occasionally have yoga farts. That's what I call them. If kneeling & bending over to get something out from under the bed for instance. Yoga farts.

This reminds me of one of my most embarrassing moments in a meeting at work. In a room full of people I have to leave the meeting early so I sand up and then realise my purse has got knocked under my chair so I bend down to pick it up and 'pppfffttt' - right towards one of my colleagues who was sitting in the chair next to me! so not only did I fart but it appeared 'aimed at someone!!! Sadly the meeting was quiet at that point and everyone there heard it clearly!!!

If that wasn't bad enough, by the time I got to work the next day EVERYONE in the building had heard about it!

 

[Cruisin]

Hmmm, I wonder how they are supposed to get to the bathroom to "solve" this problem if they are not allowed to walk because it causes the problem.

 

[pirateofthecarolinas]

That would be my mother's 83 year old husband, while carving her Easter ham yesterday. I take that back since he wasn't actually walking. I have tears rolling down my face as I type this.

Good Times, good times!


Lori

 

[daisy2]

My uncle Neil could clear a room out. He would blame the "Barking Spiders". My other uncle Gary we were at the hardware store( "he was one of thoughs uncles who would say "Pull my finger" He could fart on demand." ) well these two older ladies were in the isle my dad, uncle Neil and my uncle Gary needed to down but these tow old er ladies were just standing in the isle talking. So my uncle Gary goes down the isle let's a couple go and walks to the next isle. They walk around the corner and the two older ladies are walking rather fast out of the isle wondering where the smell had come from... My dad and two uncles were laughing so hard. It was a depends moment.....LOL

 

[lilmissdisney216]

I can see this as a public service announcement. Old People & Walking Farts: The Answer to Spontaneous Combustion.

Now if you really get a birthday cake involved.... woah buddy! Duck and cover!!

 

[Katie Dawn]

My Mamaw was infamous for this!

step toot step toot step toot step toot...

We better be careful though... since this seems to be an "older person" thing I doubt that it's just that all of these people did it when they were younger too... I bet something happens physiologically that makes it harder to control (or harder hear and know you're doing it?) or something.... which means one of these days it's gonna be us! (maybe)

 

[Disneyland_Mama]

You'll be old someday too, and most old people can't control them. My mother has that happen to her sometimes, she's 73. It embarrasses her, but there isn't much she can do about it.

ITA. One day I was at Target with my 75 year old dad and he's fartin' as were walking down the aisle. I looked at him, he looked at me and I asked him if he realized what he was doing. He told me yes, but since HE couldn't hear them, he figured I couldn't either, and that getting old sucked because they just "slip out".

 

[DVCLiz]

ITA. One day I was at Target with my 75 year old dad and he's fartin' as were walking down the aisle. I looked at him, he looked at me and I asked him if he realized what he was doing. He told me yes, but since HE couldn't hear them, he figured I couldn't either, and that getting old sucked because they just "slip out".

You know what they say..."After 50, never trust a fart..."

Where's the skid mark smilie?

 

[IDoDis]

A person who walks and farts at the same time is called a "crop duster" around here.

 

[Feralpeg]

Ok, so you are saying they can't go to the bathroom & let them loose there? Or get them out? That's what I do. I think if you are standing in my kitchen, tooting away, then you can go to the bathroom.

I don't have walking farts, yet. But I do occasionally have yoga farts. That's what I call them. If kneeling & bending over to get something out from under the bed for instance. Yoga farts.

Sorry. It doesn't work that way. Some day you'll be old and your plumbing will not work as well as it used to. Then, you'll think back to this thread and understand.

 

[starann]

My Bama used to pass gas EVERY time we were in a Hallmark store....she would pass one, I would hear it and say "I heard that" To which she would start laughing and pass some more, which lead to more laughing and more gas. By that time I was down another isle, cause I knew what was coming!!!!!!!! It became an inside joke. Thanks for reminding me of my Bama...what I wouldn't give to be in a hallmark store with her, farting or not!


That being said, as we get older, our muscle tone is not so good, esp 'down there' which is why they invented depends.....most older people can't help it, and also can't hear it, so they assume no one else did either.....which is why my patients tell me 'don't get older, they tell you it;s the golden years, more like the rusty years!"

 

[Mermaid02]

We were at an Air Show (no pun intended!) about 17 years ago and someone in the crowd let one fly (pun intended) my then 3 year old daughter yelled, "Somebody's butt burped!"

 

[StephyDee]

Oh goodness.

I work in retail, so I help many older customers with buying things, which means I spend more time with them. Well this one time a while back an elderly lady (seemed to be in her late 80s) came in with her nurse assistant to find some shoes. Well, she's in a wheelchair, and she can stand just long enough to put the shoes on her feet and that's it. Well, as she's getting herself up up, all I hear is a one long, continuous "pppppppfffffffttttt" that lasted A LOT longer than your ordinary toot. I wanted to laugh, because it was extremely quiet in the store, and even the associates in the jewelry counter across the other side of the store looked over to see who had let one go. The assistant never flinched, and neither did the lady, so I didn't either, because I knew that would just be wrong.

 

[KimR]

This is too funny. My cousin and I were actually talking about this today because our Grandma walks through her living room everytime we are over there farting.

But isn't it nice to have something you can count on.

Is anyone else confused as to who is the farter and who is the fartee?

 

[omghidanielle]

My grandmother has done this for years, and apparently, was just made aware of this. She told my Mom yesterday that she blamed her recently installed stent for her excessive flatulence.

I haven't stopped laughing since.

 

[DVCLiz]

This is too funny. My cousin and I were actually talking about this today because our Grandma walks through her living room everytime we are over there farting.

But isn't it nice to have something you can count on.

Is anyone else confused as to who is the farter and who is the fartee?

"Every time we visit her, my cousin and I hear our grandmother farting as she walks through her living room."

There, is that clear?

 

[Cinderellabride]

About burping and farting, my Grandma always used to say, "it's better to let it out and bare the shame, than hold it in and bare the pain"

 

[Pikester]

About burping and farting, my Grandma always used to say, "it's better to let it out and bare the shame, than hold it in and bare the pain"