Old people & walking farts.

[charming23]

This is too funny. My cousin and I were actually talking about this today because our Grandma walks through her living room everytime we are over there farting.

But isn't it nice to have something you can count on.

 

[SKWDW]

Oh no! This could be a 13.1 mile reality for me in a couple of weeks. I'm doing a 1/2 Marathon in a mostly retirement age community.

I'm used to walking alone so I don't encounter this phenomenon.

 

[ryan840]

My grandpa always blamed it on the duck that followed him everywhere.

 

[SKWDW]

I've heard about those ducks, plus barking spiders.

 

[MIGrandma]

You'll be old someday too, and most old people can't control them. My mother has that happen to her sometimes, she's 73. It embarrasses her, but there isn't much she can do about it.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

My grandmother used to joke that it was the only thing that propelled her forward when she needed to walk...

Seems that it happens to old animals as well. My 16-year-old dog farts on her way up the stairs every night.

 

[dopeyone]

you need to be old? I do this all the time, I didn't think you can hear them..i thought walking had a silencing effect on them..kinda like a muffler! wow do i feel embarassed now

 

[wdwfan16]

OMG. This is my Aunt Maureen. Between THAT and the pocket that was constantly filled with tic tacs she could never sneak up on anyone.

Maybe the tit tacs were suppose to distract the listener so they did not hear the farts.

 

[Lady Godiva]

Maybe the tit tacs were suppose to distract the listener so they did not hear the farts.

 

[wdwfan16]

OMG I missed that typo.

 

[tink1969]

 

[GeorgeG]

So, you would deny us old folks some of life's simple pleasures...

 

[Carnie]

I was behind on old lady in Walmat once. It was a constant noisy stream as she moved, like she was gas powered.

I cut out and went elsewhere, but any time I passed by her in an aisle, there she was, rootin' and tootin' and rollin'.

 

[tzolkin]

My friend's dad used to tell us about his mom's farting issue almost every night at dinner. She was a proper woman who "never" passed gas. Apparently, she would cough to try to cover the noise of the farts, but she could never get the timing right.

I've heard people try this walking around in stores too and it never seems to work.


Also, what's with the people who will shake their leg after farting while walking? I've been behind a few people that have done this. I always look at the ground to make sure they didn't shake something out the bottom of their pant leg.

 

[Sinderelli]

I am at this thread!!

 

[wdwmom0f3]

Or when they do it and say "did ya hear them cows?" while you are standing out close to a pasture. Blame it on the cows.

 

[nd5056]

It’s a medical condition, let me explain:

An elderly lady goes into the doctor and tells him - "Doctor, I don't know what the problem is, but I've been farting all the time. It's not really a problem socially because they don't make any noise and don't smell. I just can't stop farting all the time. In fact, since I've been standing here I must have farted at least 20 times."

"No kidding..." says the doctor with a bit of an upturned nose. The doc says "I've got just the stuff." and gives her some pills. "Here take these for 10 days, then return for a follow up appointment."

So she takes the pills and returns 10 later as instructed. Infuriated, she confronted the doctor. "What kind of medicine is this? I'm still farting just as much! They still don't make any noise, but now they stink terribly!"

The doctor nodded, "Great, now that we've your sinuses cleared up, we'll work on your hearing next!"

.

 

[lecach]

You'll be old someday too, and most old people can't control them. My mother has that happen to her sometimes, she's 73. It embarrasses her, but there isn't much she can do about it.

Most of them truly cant control it - and most dont realize it's happening. They cant hear them so they dont know it's audible. I work in a retirement community and hear this all the time. I truly believe that if they COULD control it they would.

I have always had quite a problem with gas myself. My DH pointed out that I will most definately be one of the older people with the "walking toots" since I have so much trouble now and I am only 41.

 

[Motherofboys]

My friend's dad used to tell us about his mom's farting issue almost every night at dinner. She was a proper woman who "never" passed gas. Apparently, she would cough to try to cover the noise of the farts, but she could never get the timing right.

I've heard people try this walking around in stores too and it never seems to work.


Also, what's with the people who will shake their leg after farting while walking? I've been behind a few people that have done this. I always look at the ground to make sure they didn't shake something out the bottom of their pant leg.

LOL, my DH's dad did that to him in a Hudson's store! My DH almost died of embarrassment! We still laugh about his dad "shaking one loose"

I work with 4 people over 70 -- I can't tell you how many farts I have walked through, the strange noises "coming from the copier", and how many times I have had to keep a straight face while one of them was sitting down into an office chair and let one go

 

[alexensmom]

It’s a medical condition, let me explain:



.

We need to recirculate this thread in 40 years for all of us who will be carrying tic-tacs, coughing, and blaming the swarm of ninja ducks behind us