Offered to take a friend... now can't afford it

[iwrbnd]

So sorry to hear about your situation. It is scary how fast your finances can change in this economy. Would your niece's family be willing to pay a portion to help defray the cost to you? September is still a few months away to save. Would your DD and her best friend be willing to get a job this summer to also help pay towards the trip. If they are 16 they would both be old enough to babysit or get a part time job. Good luck to you and your family.

That's a good idea. If she really wants to go she can pay for some of it. If she doesn't want to do that then she must not want to go bad enough.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

If I were in your siblings/inlaws shoes--I'd have a hard time swallowing that money is so tight that you are still going on the trip.

I'm sure there is something that can be worked out, but I would think very carefully about how you will communicate your new pickle to them.

DH lost his job Nov 1 last year and was reemployed by Dec 1. It increased our expenses. It was a fine line to weigh what we could afford and could not.

Things are fine now. But you have to be extremely careful about conveying your hardships when you are still enjoying luxuries. It could bite you in the butt if you aren't careful.

Not saying your DN is entitled to a free trip--just that, you are very susceptible to judgement by your family.

 

[twinklebug]

I'm in a similar situation only my niece is only 4 yrs (will be in May). She knows it's her turn to go to WDW this year as her sister has gone the past two years. There is no way that I can't take her this year.

There is a huge difference in the cognitive abilities of a 4 yo and a 16 yo. The OP's niece needs to understand what this means financially for the family to bring her along. This is a good time to explain what has occurred in reality to her and to work together toward a goal if everyone feels it's worth working for.

As for your 4yo niece, I hope you can manage it somehow - the "world" is just so magical to a tot that age. Although Disney will always be magical in it's own way, you'll never be able to revisit that brand of magic where they still believe Mickey and Minnie are (... oops... I can't say it here ) once they've outgrown it.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I see you are in Utah--

What about Disneyland instead?

How many persons are on this trip incl. the niece?

This will help us look at alternative options for resorts/hotels cost cutting.

 

[chisnpeke]

I see you are in Utah--

What about Disneyland instead?

How many persons are on this trip incl. the niece?

This will help us look at alternative options for resorts/hotels cost cutting.

That's an idea! I know it's not nearly as big but I thought Disneyland was just as magical. I actually prefer it to the MK. Maybe also add in Universal or Sea World in San Diego?

Later on, when you can afford it, make the big trip to WDW.

 

[StephMK]

If it were me, I would present it to the girls that you are short some trip money and see if they can earn it. I would not go without DN or make her feel that her going is causing the shortfall. She may figure it out but I wouldn't present it that way. Just that the "family" is short on funds. You could offer to postpone or see what they can come up with. Could you afford to split the difference if they can earn half?

They may surprise you with their creativity. Can they work together & get transportation somehow? Have a yard sale, be mother's helpers, babysit, work weekends, help run birthday parties, advertise to do odd jobs? My kids had a nanny one summer and loved her. Maybe the parents would work with you on transportation? Since you are away from town, I don't know what the options are but there is still some time.

Are there things you usually pay for that you could stop for the time being? Activities, school lunches, etc?

 

[MMluvsWDW]

I'm with the majority here. I grew up in the same type of area you are in and we always found a way to earn money. I'm sure at 15/16 they can get creative if they really want to go. I know I did!

Like most said maybe put the ball in their court and say as a family we need to work hard on making some money so we can go on this trip. Rather than specifying your niece specifically. You might be surprised with what they come up with and you have more than your niece's costs covered!

My parents told me at 14 that we wouldn't be going. Well I figured out a cheaper hotel, cheaper food, and how my sister and I (11 and 14) could pay for our own tickets into the parks and presented them with the idea. We ended up going that year on my plan! If they want it bad enough they'll make it happen! What a great life learning experience.

 

[soontobewed07]

Why doesn't your family take a vote? Cut the trip by a day or two. Take away your park hoppers stay off site. Is there somewhere near where you work that they could also work? Is there something in your office they could do?

I know that in the summer alot of mother's look for mother's helpers.

I feel like you have alot of options other than not taking your niece. Good Luck

 

[bmartin1206]

I would move heaven and earth to keep a promise to a child no matter what age they are. Especially one not able to go otherwise. You mention you will not go into debt (use of credit cards) but are you really going into debt if you can afford to take your family. Obviously you are able to put money aside so you would easily be able to pay off the "debt" relatively quickly. If things are so tight you can't afford to pay the extra cost perhaps the timing of the trip is not for you either.

I was faced with the same situation last year. We allowed my son to invite a friend. Same situation. He would not be able to go any other way. Then financial things changed and it was in doubt since I had taken a pay cut and my wife was barely working at all. We had decided we would postpone the trip before we'd tell him he couldn't go. So we changed reservation and dining plans to save $$$, utilized more coupons when shopping and cut back on water, electricity etc. It became sort of a game. I worked a little part time, my son was in a band and offered his money for gigs and we easily saved/made enough money to allow him to go. Didn't even need the extra money from the extra jobs but we used it to other special things.

Nothing replaces a child's smile and wonderment and nothing will replace the disappointment and hurt of being told you cannot go. Disney will still be there later. Put it off or step it up.

 

[punkin]

I am taking my niece to WDW in a few days. Because she is coming, we have to have a bigger room, so we are staying off site in a condo with a kitchen to save money. We have to go during her school break (I don't mind taking my kids out of school for a day or two, but her father does) so it is more expensive. Her father was out of work until very recently so we are paying for everything (we have leftover tickets, but I had to buy a ticket for her). We are driving down so the only airfare we pay for is hers (she does not live near us-I would have paid for her to come to us during spring break anyway, so that's not really a Disney expense). What I am saying is that it can be done with a little cutting and altering of plans.

 

[CJMickeyMouse]

If DH and I promised a friend or relative that they were going with us on a trip, they I feel it's our responsibility to make it happen. DH and I would be the ones trying to earn the extra money, not the girls.

Good luck, I hope it all works out!!

 

[maggiew]

If I invited my niece (or any other child), I would honor that obligation.

If you are staying onsite, maybe switch to offsite? The Buena Vista Suites has an $88 per night rate and it includes a breakfast and holds 6. Also, on the Orlando resorts board there has been a $29/$39 deal for Comfort Suites many times over the past couple months.

If you have the dining plan, cut that and plan meals that you can share or that are cheaper. Maybe do one special meal (like Crystal Palace breakfast or something) for their birthday celebration. Order pizza a couple nights. Cicis pizza buffet offsite is cheap, around ~$5 per person.

If you have hoppers, you can cut that out too. There really is no need to hop from park to park. We never get hoppers AND we go during busy summer time (even 4th of July) without hopping and have seen everything.

I was going to suggest driving instead, but then I see you are from Utah. So not really a good option to cut costs.

Maggie

 

[MarilIncredible]

I've never had a close enough relationship with Aunts and Uncles to go on vacations with them instead of my parents. Oh, and our vacations were usually way better than theirs, anyway.

I think I would just tell you sister/brother/niece's parents the truth, and see if you could all work out a compromise. I'd also look into off-site condos to save money, if you are not already staying offsite.

 

[Bete]

You made the promise. Your niece didn't come to you; you went to her with the trip. If you go back on your word no matter what the reason, I would never trust you again. I don't think it's fair to your own daughter, either. You stated this was a birthday situation and that they are very close to each other. I would be insulted if you went anyway and you left me behind.

I'm not understanding over $700 for tickets for your niece alone. This sounds outrageous. A Disney annual pass doesn't even cost this much. If this includes other tickets, then cut back. If you already purchased OOP all the tickets and can't return them, then you'll have to cut back on other costs.

If you go now then cut back on costs. This may mean taking a shorter trip, cheaper dining, cheaper resort, etc. Take a trip to the grocery store in Florida and eat in your room for some or all your meals. If you get free dining then this might not help, here. Change your dates to see if you can get a better deal that way. Maybe, you can get in on a better promotion that way. I would use an airbed, sleeping bag or the equivalent and not pay for a bigger place, etc. Maybe, consider driving back and forth if it saves more.

If the above doesn't work for you then postpone the trip. I don't feel your niece or her family is responsible for incurring any costs, here. Where's your Disney magic? Sacrifice some and I think you can make this workable to include her. I'm sorry you are sounding selfish to me. Give up some on your part and it will work out.

 

[DVCBELLE]

I've never had a close enough relationship with Aunts and Uncles to go on vacations with them instead of my parents. Oh, and our vacations were usually way better than theirs, anyway.

I think I would just tell you sister/brother/niece's parents the truth, and see if you could all work out a compromise. I'd also look into off-site condos to save money, if you are not already staying offsite.

It seems like maybe the OP is planning on getting free dining since she is planning on Sept.

 

[chocovrdmicears]

If DH and I promised a friend or relative that they were going with us on a trip, they I feel it's our responsibility to make it happen. DH and I would be the ones trying to earn the extra money, not the girls.

Good luck, I hope it all works out!!

I agree 100%

 

[bettymae1121]

I would do my best to cut costs where possible to reduce the extra amount it takes to bring the neice along, and then talk with daugher and neice. Let them know the score and tell them that if they can come up with the rest of the money, then it's a go. This puts the power in their hands, and teaches a great life lesson about having to work for our treats in life. If they slack off and dont' come up with the money, then it was their choice for the neice not to go. This way she isn't univited (which I would make a lot of effort not to do, it's not fair to her) but you don't have to come up with the extra money, either. Even at minimum wage, the neice just by herself should be able to work enough hours over the summer to cover her own expenses, if you daugher chooses to help, it will be even easier. Heck, by working they'd then have their own spending money for the trip, to spend as they please, and what 16 year old wouldn't love that!

 

[bmartin1206]

I've never had a close enough relationship with Aunts and Uncles to go on vacations with them instead of my parents. Oh, and our vacations were usually way better than theirs, anyway.

I think I would just tell you sister/brother/niece's parents the truth, and see if you could all work out a compromise. I'd also look into off-site condos to save money, if you are not already staying offsite.

That is a sad statement. No offense but this sounds a bit self centered and selfish. It sounds as thought he poster has a relatively close relationship and recognizes they have some sort of means to make it happen for someone who otherwise would not be able to go. Compromise does not sound like a large part of the picture for the niece and her family.

 

[JUS915]

You made the promise. Your niece didn't come to you; you went to her with the trip. If you go back on your word no matter what the reason, I would never trust you again. I don't think it's fair to your own daughter, either. You stated this was a birthday situation and that they are very close to each other. I would be insulted if you went anyway and you left me behind.

I'm not understanding over $700 for tickets for your niece alone. This sounds outrageous. A Disney annual pass doesn't even cost this much. If this includes other tickets, then cut back. If you already purchased OOP all the tickets and can't return them, then you'll have to cut back on other costs.

If you go now then cut back on costs. This may mean taking a shorter trip, cheaper dining, cheaper resort, etc. Take a trip to the grocery store in Florida and eat in your room for some or all your meals. If you get free dining then this might not help, here. Change your dates to see if you can get a better deal that way. Maybe, you can get in on a better promotion that way. I would use an airbed, sleeping bag or the equivalent and not pay for a bigger place, etc. Maybe, consider driving back and forth if it saves more.

If the above doesn't work for you then postpone the trip. I don't feel your niece or her family is responsible for incurring any costs, here. Where's your Disney magic? Sacrifice some and I think you can make this workable to include her. I'm sorry you are sounding selfish to me. Give up some on your part and it will work out.

I think the $740 extra was for her park tickets, an extra room because they couldn't all fit in one room, and her airfare.

 

[gillenkl]

I would postpone the trip until I could afford to include her.

I agree with this since you already extended the invitation it would be rude to still go yourselves.