O/T Hypothetical situation ... what would you do???

[irisesareblue]

HYPOTHETICAL SITUATION - to protect the innocent in case people figure out who they are - Friends of ours have planned a trip south with another couple (long time friends) and to be frank, they are quite nervous about vacationing with another couple to begin with as they are used to vacationing alone. They both have highly stressful jobs and their vacations consist of going to Disney to re-live their childhoods or laying somewhere on a beach doing absolutely nothing (maybe she reads some Harlequins....)

Well, their friends innocently asked another couple to come along with them on their vacation - they thought it would be a nice surprise, no doubt. Problem is that they really don't want to go on vacation with this other couple - the husband is an alcoholic and is not a "nice" drunk and they both act like the world owes them a favour.

Now, my friend's husband was SO UPSET that he has asked her to look at cashing in the plane tickets and using the cancelled tickets towards another trip in the future and booking a separate destination for this holiday. Which means that my friends would be out the money that they were going to pay towards the room in this sunny destination (Jamaica) and give the room to the other couple to enjoy.

Of course, when the "surprise" was given, there wasn't much to do other than say "that's nice". My friend hoped that her dead silence when told about the "surprise" would be sufficient to discourage said inviting friends but no such luck - they are apparently currently waiting to see if the other couple can get flights - and my friend is already searching out short-notice vacations.

So, do my friends make their longtime friends angry and bail at the last moment and let this new couple take their room (paid for, of couse) or do they go, grin and bear it and NEVER plan another couples vacation again?

Basically, I'm wondering what I should tell my friend to do....because if I was in her situation, I'd be having a breadown and booking another Disney trip!

 

[tone.def]

Bail and tell them why - otherwise they would always wonder what happened.

 

[dancin Disney style]

Sounds like no matter what there is going to be some upset. I would tell the second couple that I do not really want to go on vacation with couple #3. You could give any variety of reasons if you do not want to give the truth. Couple #2 can then be given the choice to un-invite #3 or go with them without couple #1.

Under no circumstances would I go on a vacation with people I don't want to be with. I work far to hard to ruin what precious little vacation time that I get.

 

[Gigi22]

I am in total agreement with the previous poster. Under no circumstances would I allow myself to be stuck with incompatible people during a hard-won vacation. I would explain that we were not interested in going on vacation with couple #3, and that this was the deal-breaker. I would also tell them that we intended to go on vacation ourselves. This at least puts at least part of the resolution of the "problem" back where it properly belongs, with couple #2--who can have the fun of dealing with couple #3. Kind of messy all around, but at least the people who inadvertently created the problem, well-meaning though they may have been, will have to take some responsibility for their actions.

 

[momlee4]

I'd be honest and tell couple #2 the truth, that I did not want to vacation with couple #3, and that is why I am bailing out of the vacation. I wouldn't leave it up to couple #2 to make the decision (pick me or pick them) - even if it was their fault for not consulting with me first. If couple #2 had any decency to feel bad after the truth was out, they would then try to discourage couple #3 from coming.

 

[ribica]

I'd be honest about it and explain why I don't want to vacation with couple #3. Why on earth would I pay good money to go on a trip with people I don't like?!? I avoid those kinds of people (bad drunks) when I'm on vacation so I certainly would not be pressured, roped or otherwise duped into travelling with them! Also, if they are not honest about the reasons for not wanting to have couple #3 join them, it may come up again sometime in the future.
Good luck!!

 

[seashoreCM]

I would want my money back for the room too.

Not sure how to hint to your friends (couple #1) how to make that happen but it might go along the lines of either couple #1 takes over the entire room or couple #2 takes over the entire room, either way with appropriate reimbursement to the other couple.

By the way, are these six person suites, or how can three couples share one room?

 

[irisesareblue]

It's a time share villa....so the 3rd couple will take the living room/sofa bed. BUT my friend told me today that the 3rd couple won't be going. So she's very happy!

Thanks for giving me feedback on this - I thought I was giving her good advice but wasn't sure. Sometimes I tend to go into "legal mode" (so my hubby calls it) and the personal side of the relationship gets lost in translation.