Not Talking- Advice?

[dreamer17555]

I am starting to get really worried about my son. He is 18 months old and doesn't talk! He says only three words. Mama, Dada, Up. Thats it. The doctor said he is a bit behind but fine. He knows what you are saying. For instance I can say "Go bring mama the ball." And he will go in his room and bring me his ball. He has some sign language but mostly he just whines when he wants something. We have been trying to get him to say the word ie, "cup" when he wants a drink but he gets so upset that he usually ends up in tears and refuses the drink.

It is so heartbreaking. Any suggestions?

-Becca-

 

[mjkacmom]

Call your local department of health, and get in touch with early intervention. Within 30 days, they will send out professionals who will evaluate your ds, for free, and will provide services if he qualifies. There is no downside to having him tested - either they will say he is fine, or he will get speech therapy. I had my youngest ds evaluated at 15 months, and they came out and said he had a delay, but not a 6 month one which would qualify him, but to call in 3 months if he didn't improve, which he didn't. He started ST at 20 months, and it was amazing how much he improved!

Speech therapists get SO annoyed at pediatrician's who say to wait it out - IE services are SO much better before the age of 3, and the earlier, the better. I know many who called EI at this age, and no one ever regrets it.

 

[dreamer17555]

Thanks for the tip! Our Ped said it was too early to think about a ST. I will call around and see what I can find. Thanks.

-Becca-

 

[jellybeans0607]

Does he use a pacifier?

 

[tinkerlisa]

I have the same problem. Mine is a few months younger and he doesn't even say Mama or Dada! He does however say pretty, see it(which sounds like a cuss word when he says it! ) and what's that. I wouldn't worry to much. They learn on their own time and if he understands what you say to him that's great! As long as you are communicating with your child, he is learning. Some kids learn fast. Some don't. They are all different. My six year old had a huge vocabulary when he was 18 months. Like I said, my youngest doesn't talk much. He whines and points. I try not to worry about it, but it is hard not too. Especially since I have another son and I end up comparing them.
Give him time and he will end up talking your ear off soon enough!!!

 

[DopeysMommy]

I am starting to get really worried about my son. He is 18 months old and doesn't talk! He says only three words. Mama, Dada, Up. Thats it. The doctor said he is a bit behind but fine. He knows what you are saying. For instance I can say "Go bring mama the ball." And he will go in his room and bring me his ball. He has some sign language but mostly he just whines when he wants something. We have been trying to get him to say the word ie, "cup" when he wants a drink but he gets so upset that he usually ends up in tears and refuses the drink.

It is so heartbreaking. Any suggestions?

-Becca-

There is a great book The Late Talkers, I think the author's name is Agin??
Please have him evaluated for apraxia. My Ds2 was referred for evaluation by a speech therapist at 15 mo, and I held off for 7 months. Apraxia/late talking whatever--if therapy is needed, it is better to start early rather than later.

Your state may offer therapy as part of early intervention as well.

Your son displays what my son does--great receptive language, he gets what you are saying but can't verbalize. It's frustrating for everyone. In therapy they can work on words, signs and possibly a picture book. In 6 months my son is making real progress with signs and words.

 

[tinkerlisa]

Call your local department of health, and get in touch with early intervention. Within 30 days, they will send out professionals who will evaluate your ds, for free, and will provide services if he qualifies. There is no downside to having him tested - either they will say he is fine, or he will get speech therapy. I had my youngest ds evaluated at 15 months, and they came out and said he had a delay, but not a 6 month one which would qualify him, but to call in 3 months if he didn't improve, which he didn't. He started ST at 20 months, and it was amazing how much he improved!

Speech therapists get SO annoyed at pediatrician's who say to wait it out - IE services are SO much better before the age of 3, and the earlier, the better. I know many who called EI at this age, and no one ever regrets it.

I never knew about this service!! I was always told to wait until they are around 3 or so before you get them evaluated. That's what my son's Dr. told us to do at his last appointment

 

[kacaju]

if he is getting frustrated, get help!!

 

[design_mom]

My DD had early intervention for her speech. (In Ohio, it's called "Help Me Grow.") It was truly a wonderful program. By the time she was 3, she'd caught up and graduated from the program. (Early intervention covers ages 0-3 and the school system picks up at 3+.) I definitely recommend calling for an evaluation.

Both of my children were "late talkers." Baby sign language *really* helped cut down on the frustration. It also seemed to help encourage them to talk more, too. Once they got a 'taste' of communicating and being understood, they were anxious to do more of it -- whether through sign or speech. You can use whatever signs you wish, but there is a cute series of videos called "Signing Times" which include some common ASL signs.

 

[Macsmomma]

I agree with PP. Check into early intervention now. I waited until my son was 3 like my doctor said and I wish so bad that I would have had him checked at 2 or sooner. He has been diagnosed with Apraxia of speech and has been in therapy for 5 years. He completely understood all that we said but was unable to verbalize what he wanted us to know. It was very frustrating to him. He is wonderful in school. His grades are good. This is something that has not held him back except with his speech. It has gotten a lot better and will continue to do so. Being around other children has helped a great deal. I would say that a total stranger would now be able to understand 90-95% of what his says. When we started at age 3 a stranger might have understood 40% of what he was saying.

 

[MusiqChic99]

My son said a lot of words by the age of 2 but 2 months after his 2nd birthday we took the pacifer away. He talks all the time now. He still doesn't say a lot of sentences but he will say some like "I wanna see Cars". Most of the time though he will say "drink" or "eat" but not communicate in a full sentence. No one seems concerned since he repeats everything people say and says a lot of words. I dont know if I should be concerned about him not talking in full sentences or not. When I talk to other moms at work they say not to worry and that boys tend to be that way anyway. I know I have tried to be less helpful to him and constantly ask "what do you want". This has encouraged him to talk and tell me what he wants now instead of just pointing.

 

[tinkerlisa]

Dreamer~ Just a question but is your son tongue tied? Mine was and we had the frenulum snipped under his tongue. The ear nose and throat doctor we were refered to said that this is usually why some kids talk late or have some other speech impediment(a lisp). The child is unable to move their tongue enough to form words.

 

[Minnie_me]

Try simple sign language. When a child is frustrated by not being able to communicate, sign language eases the frustration, and s/he usually starts speaking.

We did sign with our girls just for fun!

 

[tzolkin]

Your son sounds just like mine. At 18mos I talked to the Dr and she contacted Early Intervention for us. They came out and did a full evaluation of him (fine & gross motor skills, cognitive, and social development). To my surprise he scored at 22 mos for speech. He only said maybe 5 words and would not even use them consistently. Like your son, he had great receptive language (understood everything you said and could even follow multi-part instructions, point to pictures to answer questions), but his expressive language was almost non-existant. Both of my DDs were putting a few words together by the time they were 12 mos, so I was extremely concerned that he didn't even call me mama at 18.

If your doctor says he is too "young" that may be because there is little expectation by the tests that the child speak before 24 mos. The people from Early Intervention said it's very difficult to qualify for services before 24mos because of the way the tests are set up.

It was extremely frustrating. We would be in the kitchen and I would just keep picking things up and asking him to point to what he wanted and he would just get so upset and be screaming so hard that he forgot what he wanted to begin with. We kept monitoring his speech with our Dr. and at 24mos he started to say a few words.

He has just started talking in the past month. He is 29 mos. He's not using proper grammar, but he is putting together 4 or 5 words to get an idea across. Less screaming and frustration.

I would suggest the screening even if he doesn't qualify for services, and offer the comment that it will get better.

 

[tzolkin]

Try simple sign language. When a child is frustrated by not being able to communicate, sign language eases the frustration, and s/he usually starts speaking.

We did sign with our girls just for fun!

We tried this with our son as well. The only word he would use was "more". (He's a big eater.) This did help at the dinner table. He would sign it and this was actually one of the only words he used. (He would say it while signing, I suppose imitating the way we did it.)

My neighbor's son has a speech therapist come to the house a few times a week for a few years. He's speaking now, but could only use signs until he was 3.

 

[mjkacmom]

I never knew about this service!! I was always told to wait until they are around 3 or so before you get them evaluated. That's what my son's Dr. told us to do at his last appointment

Forget the pediatrician - ST works SO much faster if you start before age 3, and the services are also much better. I was told my ds didn't speak because he was a twin - hello, his sister is a twin, also, and she speaks fine. Three months into ST, and he was a new kid, and much less frustrated! BTW, they usually LOVE ST - in our case, she would come to our home for an hour each week, with an armfull of toys, and they would play, play, play - his twin sister was SO jeolous!

 

[allyphoe]

Mine had fewer than 5 words total at 18 months, and flunked her 18-mo screening (done by the health department). At 24 months, she had never put two words together, and flunked that screening. So at 25 months, she was evaluated by a speech therapist, and scored as equivalent to 33 months.

The speech therapist we saw said that ability to communicate sufficient that the kid wasn't frustrated was really what they focus on at that age. And DD was never frustrated, and was always able to communicate exactly what she wanted - she just didn't use words to do it as a younger kid, and didn't string them together as an older kid.

 

[dreamer17555]

Does he use a pacifier?

Nope. He did but gave it up. However he has a blue blanket I might have to send to college with him.

-Becca-

 

[Tricia819]

Does he happen to have older siblings? My two eldest were both talking by 12 months, but my son who is 18 mos too, just started talking. I think it's just because he has two little mommies that give him whatever he wants. He's like your son, he understands what you tell him perfectly, but would sign instead of talk and because it was so darn cute (he points and does this backwards hand wave) he gets what he needs. Now it's like someone flipped a switch and he's picking up new words everyday.

 

[dreamer17555]

Does he happen to have older siblings? My two eldest were both talking by 12 months, but my son who is 18 mos too, just started talking. I think it's just because he has two little mommies that give him whatever he wants. He's like your son, he understands what you tell him perfectly, but would sign instead of talk and because it was so darn cute (he points and does this backwards hand wave) he gets what he needs. Now it's like someone flipped a switch and he's picking up new words everyday.

He does have an older sister (she is 6). One day while she was at school he wouldn't stop fussing. It drove me to tears, nothing I did was right. She walks in and he runs over to her. He then whines (same thing I had been hearing all day) and she heads to the kitchen and trades his blue cup for his red cup and bam- the crying stopped. She tells me that he wanted his red cup. Really? Somedays I think I need to keep her home to help translate.

-Becca-