Not so Wounded Anymore - Part II!

[jennifaerie]

I've been feeling pretty down since last night, and I realized if anyone would understand, it'd be you guys, so I figured I'd tell my little story.

We caught the Disney bug last year (dangerous illness!), and we decided if we were going to take a cruise (which we weren't sure we even wanted to do), we'd do it through Disney. Disney takes care of you at WDW, so my assumption was they'd take care of you on the cruise.

My fiance and I are not Disney fanatics... every other decorative item in our house is not Disney. We do not worship Mickey Mouse in front of a shrine dedicated to him (I know, I know, what's wrong with us?! ). But we do absolutely adore being adults who feel like children whenever we go to Disney World. In fact, we're honeymooning there this year.

We took Wonder cruise in January, and if you had asked me the day we got on the boat (or even the next day) if we'd cruise again, the answer would have been a resounding no-- cruising is NOT for us. (Guess what's coming...)

When we got back, we booked two more.

Yep. We drank the Disney kool-aid.

Sorry for the long-windedness... just wanted to give you a little background... it makes the story more pathetic.

We're not the most social people, but we have a "couple" that lives about six hours away, that we're really close to. We visit when we can, and we keep in touch. In fact, they're in our wedding.

We decided to take the plunge and invite them on the Wonder cruise we're taking next year. We were even going to pay for it for them as a gift for being such good friends over the years.

How do you feel when you get the response, "We're really not Disney or cruise people"?

Ouch.

There were other reasons, but it ultimately made me feel like I'm was some sort of weirdo for going. *We're* not Disney people. *We're* not cruise people either.

I don't like eggs. I don't like cheese. I don't like English muffins, but gosh, egg and cheese sandwiches are one of my favorite things. They *go* together. So do Disney and cruises!

We are really looking forward to the cruises we have booked, but I have to say, it really hit me where it hurts when I heard that.

It's nice to know I can come here and not feel weird for liking things Disney.

People just don't get it until they try it, I guess.

 

[one princess]

Wow. Their loss for sure! I would be happy to go with you. Let me check my calendar.
Just as a side note, my dh and I aren't "Disney People" either and my dh is not a "cruise person". That said we are going on our 4th DCL this summer and I already have another one booked. Dh asked me the other day why we weren't doing the 15 day repo!
Sorry your friends aren't going with you. You will have a wonderful time anyway.

 

[millerpjm]

When we selected Disney for a cruise, we did so mainly because of the great kids' programming - we (selfish parents that we are ) wanted a combination of a "just us" vacation and a family vacation. We told DH's parents and sister and brother-in-law, and asked if they wanted to join us on the cruise, as well as asking my mom. After much hemming and hawing, DH's family decided not to go. My mom went with a friend and had an adjoining cabin. We had the BEST time!!!! We came back with another cruise booked, and full of stories and 700 pictures showing how much fun the cruise was.

I think they may have regretted not going with us, because now they're all booked for next year with us!

 

[ericamanda01]

People have a lot of assumptions when it comes to both Disney and cruising. With Disney it makes most think of Mickey Mouse running around and kids screaming. Cruising makes some think of shuffle board and buffets. I wouldn't take it personally, some people just will never get it. We have a couple that we are close friends with and in the past 6 years have tried and tried to explain it to them and they just don't get it. We gave up. We don't yet have kids and we get all the same questions about "Isn't Disney just for kids?" We just answer, "Yes we are thank you."

 

[ILoveDisney&Cruising]

I'm so sorry that they don't get it!

 

[Skallywag]

Sorry to hear that your friends will not give it a go it is certainly their loss.
I love Disney and the happy feeling you get when there but my daughters definitely said they are Disneyed out so to speak and do not want to go to Disney again. Guess what this year we are going on another Disney cruise and back to Disney for Christmas and no prize for guessing who is coming along with us. Our girls and their partners too this time.
Brenda

 

[doberlady]

I offered to pay for my 24yo dd to come on our trip and she was like thanks for the offer but no thanks. Who turns down a free trip!! She went on a bad Carnival cruise and thats it for her.

 

[castlegazer]

Oh, I have it just as bad, I think. Our best friends ARE Disney PEOPLE - to the extreme but I for the life of me, can't get them on a cruise. It's killing me. I can not figure out why the don't want to cruise - the love to cruise, have been on cruises, love the sun, beach, travel. But for some unknown reason, they just want to focus their money on the parks.

To each their own.

I hate it when people do that, though - I hate being called, "those Disney people"

 

[jennifaerie]

Wow! I definitely feel better.

My fiance said to me (in reference to WDW), It's nothing like you think it's going to be. You have this preconceived notion.

He's right, you do. You think it's going to be Six Flags with Disney characters. But it's not like that at all, which is why I love it. Where else can you go and feel like you're a five year old again (and actually enjoy it)? When I was in college, my parents tried to get me to go to Disney World with them (I had never been), and I flat out said, No thanks. Getting to go as an adult, though... I know it's a wonderful place.

And yes, even though I begged Rob repeatedly to let me get off the boat before we left in January, I'm glad he didn't let me leave.

one princess - Are you free?

millerpjm - We chose Disney because of the safety net, but we also chose it because of all the adults only areas. It seems more mixed on other cruises. I would never give up Serenity Bay for ... well, anything else. We get very nervous at the thought of being with other people, because we're afraid of fights, people tagging along when they don't want to (but don't know what else to do), and just all the drama. But we were willing to do it with them because we trust and know them. Well, we thought we did!

ericamanda01 - You are *so* right. We were those people. But we decided to take the chance, and we're so glad we did. Another reason was, If we wanted to go on a cruise, we would have already. I was terrified of cruises... I didn't like the idea of being trapped and not being able to just jump in a car and drive home. I didn't like the idea of looking out at ocean and nothing else. It seemed so claustrophobic (and yet, so vast). I hated it. But we figured it was the only way we could travel to the Caribbean in a relatively cheap manner where we felt safe. So we took the plunge. We're glad we did. Our banks accounts, however...

ILoveDisney&Cruising - Thank you! I appreciate it. It's frustrating.

Skallywag - We went to Disney last April and September (I haven't had a vacation in seven years... making up for lost time!), and then we stayed overnight at Disney and took the cruise in January. Honeymoon in September. Two cruises next year. I always worry we're going to be sick of it. We'll get there, and we won't like it as much as before. But the nice thing is, you get there and find other things to love about it. Each trip seems to have its own agenda. So maybe we won't want to go to WDW next year (fat chance, I think), but we'll have the cruises to other new places instead.

doberlady - I know! I can understand them feeling guilty, but it was honestly an offered gift.

castlegazer - I can tell you why I didn't want to. It's actually kind of funny. When I was growing up, we had a vacation bucket for all that spare change. My parents would ask me if I wanted to go to Disney World, and I'd always say, No, I want to go on a cruise! Somehow, between then and now, I became extremely phobic of cruises. I don't think all the Norwalk virus talk over the years helped. But I researched it into the ground and found Disney to have very high standards for everything. I also spent a somewhat tearful phone call with a DCL person, and she made me feel a lot better. She put a note on my reservation about being scared, and it really did help. She also told me she went on her first cruise at forty-seven, simply because DCL made their employees take one. She was terrified and was resolute that she'd have a bad time (she and I are *those* people... the ones that if they think they'll have a bad time, they just will), and she had a fantastic time. She made me feel a *lot* better (Thank you, Deb! ).

But I hate being a "Disney" person. No disrespect to Disney, but it just seems to have such a negative connotation when other people say it.

 

[Queenofthecastle]

We've simply stopped asking. It's not our job to convince our friends/family that a Disney vacation is so much more than rides and a big boat full of screaming kids. We all know it's about the feeling you get when you drive towards the huge welcome signs or when you see the ship for the first time. We just consider ourselves fortunate enough to have opened our minds and our hearts to Disney, and what we get in return is priceless. To us a vacation with Disney is a true break from the real world and a great emotional experience that's difficult to put into words. It is sad that so many people we know shun Disney vacations altogether without ever giving it a chance. I've even had a friend say that it's just too happy of a place to the point of making her want to vomit! Whaaaa?!

Anyway, we like to keep an open mind and try new things, not just with Disney but in all areas of life. You only live once and we don't want to miss a thing!

 

[castlegazer]

Wow! I definitely feel better.

So glad!

pssst, you are a social person, by the way

 

[karibritt01]

My suggestion to you is find your cruise meet thread for your dates, and make new friends who share your love of Disney. Hopefully you will find a person or two that you really click with, and can enjoy cruising with. You could even link your dining so you can eat with friends instead of strangers.

I wouldn't let it upset you that your friends turned down your offer. I would take it at face value... they don't like Disney. Possibly a trip somewhere different with them... beach, mountains, etc. Also, my family chooses not to take our big vacations with others, as we like answering to no one except ourselves. It could be something simple like that, and not intended as a snub.

 

[mmouse37]

We have been cruising with DCL since literally Day 1 (we were on the Maiden Voyage) and have been on a total of 16 DCL cruises since with #17 booked for this October. I can't tell you how many times I would ask family and friends and would be told "no thanks....not for us" or the like.

But every once in awhile a set of friends or family will say yes and then they are hooked. A few years ago we cruised with 4 other families and they all had a fab time....and all have cruised again with DCL (I should get a finder's fee!!! LOL)

Back in 2006 I was able to talk by sisters and parents into coming with us on the 7 day and guess what....they are coming again this October along with some friends that have never been before. We are going to be another big group of about 25 or so.

Just look at it as their loss..not yours. When my friends/famiy did finally cruise DCL they finally said to me..."now I get it" "Now I know what you are talking about"!!!

 

[wwwosie]

I am really sorry that your friends have turned your offer down. Their loss...
About 20 years ago (!) my in-laws invited the whole family on a river trip through the Grand Canyon. Even though I worked there many summers I had never been down any other way but by helicopter.
I tried to weasel out of the trip but my husband wouldn't hear it. I have to tell you that I was not looking forward to the 6 mile hike out...
Everyone was worried that I would not have a good time, would complain, would not participate in activities becasue they knew how much I dislike the outdoors and love indoor plumbing...
To cut a long story short none of their worries ever materialized and I did enough walking pre-trip that I was able not only to make it out on my own but managed not to be the last one (thinking that if I needed to be rescued many friends who work for Park Service would never let me hear the end of it was quite the motivator...)
Bottom line is: never say "we are not XXXX people" if you have not tried it. And it's sad that your good friends wouldn't do this for you... seems a bit selfish... I'd be saying the same thing if you had invited them to NYC...

 

[JNorris]

I think it depends on if they are just not "Disney crazy", or if they really detest all things Disney. If you are just not that into Disney, but don't hate it, and they are willing to try a cruise, I would encourage them to go.

If they make fun of Disney and people who enjoy it, they will spend the entire cruise trashing the experience. Every time they see a character, they will laugh at all the people stopping for pictures. They will think Castaway Cay is cheesy. If this is how they are, they would not enjoy a Disney cruise, IMHO.

But I'm available.

(and by the way, there is no Mickey shrine at my house. Just the little house plaque in the front yard with Mickey on it....and the doormat at the front door...and a couple of decorative accessories inside...but that's all I swear!)

 

[4peaches]

It's interesting that they turned down a FREE cruise. But another thought not mentioned. They may have been trying to spare your feelings.

A story: We vacationed with very good and close friends to the beach. Previously we did a lot together - dinners out, dinners in, shopping, shows, our kids are great friends, lots of sleepovers with the kids, church, etc. We spend a lot of time with one another. On the trip to the beach, we drove separate cars, had seperate condo's, but things went downhill. One of the parents was just a grumpy tourist. We tried to accomodate his desire for restaurants, playing on the beach, swimming in the pool, but it was very difficult. We had no problem with the wife or kids, just him. They asked us to take a second trip with them to Disneyland. We at first didn't want to go, but went thinking maybe he won't be the same. But he was. But this time we did a lot on our own. Hate to say it, but limited our time with them because he was again, grumpy. Well, the next year they asked us to go with them again, we turned them down with excuses that we had only enough money for one vacation to visit family. We basically lied. We still dine out together on weekends, our kids play, his wife and I do things together, be we can never travel with them again. It made us unconfortable and we don't want to feel that way on our vacation. We spared their feelings. They know we are going on the cruise and to WDW in a few weeks and that it is an expensive vacation, so they haven't asked us this year to join them. Thank goodness, cause I would have to lie to them again. I like spending time with them, but just that - a little time. Not vacationing together. But I also want to spare their feelings, so will never tell them that he is a grumpy tourist. That may be happening in your case.

 

[DisneyHobbit]

I can so relate to how you feel There is always going to be those people who will never understand the Disney magic, they think it's too immature and kid like. Even though I'm fairly new to the board I have always been a Disney fanatic. My Father used to work at Disneyland when it first opened and my Mother would spend as much time as possible at Disney. It's so hard to explain the joy and happiness you feel to others. Honestly, I think people take themselves way too seriously. It's nice to know that I can always come on the board and not feel alone. It's really your friends loss they don't go with you, maybe Tinkerbelle needs to spread some pixie dust their way.

 

[jennifaerie]

I often wonder if I'm being close-minded because we keep booking trips to WDW... so we branched out and did the cruise because it was something different. We had talked about cancelling our Disney honeymoon and booking at someplace like Sandals, but we ultimately felt it wasn't worth the money. But I'm one of those people who gets the same thing at restaurants every single time. If I enjoy it, why do anything else?

We were dreading eating with other people. Deb from DCL said that Disney works hard to match like groups up, so we were hoping we'd be with another couple or two. We ended up with two families. Almost like they had two seats left at a table, so they threw us with them. I was already in a dismal mindset (I seriously cried the entire first day). We saw another couple sitting alone at another table, and we really longed to sit with them.

Of course, wouldn't you know it, we got really attached to them. So much so, I've got our Pirate Night picture on my desk (I'm looking at it right now). I hate change... I hate new things. But I adapt once I've done my grumpy dance. (See? Sorta not social!)

She seemed open to it until she talked to her husband. So my assumption is that he wasn't keen on the idea, and things just went from there.

It feels really awkward now, though. Like I just professed my love and got rebuffed. Kinda difficult when it's your matron of honor!

I'm sure it'll blow over. But it is really like telling someone something really big and having that person not into it. I'm really embarrassed. I know I shouldn't be, but I am.

(By the way, I do have a large print of Stitch reading with the ducks in my living room... that's my shrine. )

 

[laura001]

We haven't cruised yet, but are going next spring. But wanted to say that it is exactly the same as asking someone to go to WDW with you, some people just don't get it. There are not many people that I know that share the same excitement over Disney as I do (even my DH who tags along with me).....too bad for them!!!

 

[dzneprincess]

I would think that it wouldnt matter if one was a cruise or Disney person, as isnt anyone a free vacation person?!?!? LOL