Right - but there are clear markers around identity (with Sir or Ma'am - though, I am in a position where often people around me refer to some people as Sir - we've also had a discussion about why people are reticent to refer to people as ma'am as - where I am - there's more of an age identity marker associated with those and people are less comfortable doing that - it's all very fascinating). "Friends" has no such marker (and - I mean). "Friends" doesn't necessarily mean "my friend", which is what someone was articulating earlier. "Friends" could indicate "friends of ____" or "you have friends" (for instance, when I've worked for groups and weddings, if I'm referring to the party, I might say, "friends of ___" and "friends" interchangeably - doesn't make me part of their circle - just identifies how they're together in this place. And sure - you have a thing about not being someone's friend so I'll make sure to never call you that. For me, I have and would use friends - hearing some people's anxiety or anger about assuming friendship, I might go back to folks or everyone. And yeah, people will chafe there, too (just as people will chafe at using no terms at all and just saying, "Hi - come this way" instead of "Hi ___ - come this way." As folks have pointed out, there's no perfect solution - so, you try to find one that doesn't harm people and move forward.
Sorry, totally strangers calling each other "friend" for PC reasons (in this case, to avoid having to use any words associated with gender, biological or otherwise) reminds me of stories of the "old country" where people also used an equivalent term for political reasons.
The more people try to convince me and shove this down my throat, that more it leaves a nasty taste in my mouth.
And, what's really annoying is how awkward it is to object to someone using "friend" in a way that I, personally, find inappropriate.
What am I supposed to say? "I'm not your friend, so please don't call me that?" That sounds terrible and impolite!
Whereas, if someone called me "Sir", and I identified as female, I could politely reply "I don't identify as male, so please don't call me 'Sir'." That's a completely acceptable response that doesn't sound nearly as "unfriendly" (pun intended.)
Again, could I wear a button that says "please don't call me your friend?" Well, perhaps you would, but I wouldn't.
But I could plausibly wear a button that lists my pronouns, or whatever. That's a totally socially acceptable solution.
You can go on and on about how you want to define the word "friend", and how you think other people should interpret its use. Honestly, I could care less. I know how it makes me, personally, feel to hear it being used by a total stranger. I don't like it, I have personal history that motivates that feeling, and no amount of persuasion will ever change it. Either accept it or not, that's your choice, "Friend."