New Twist on the Guy Jumping From Carnival Cruise Ship

[aprilgail2]

I am sure glad my godkids mother didn't feel that something was "off" whenever I took my godkids places...I am female but I was single and from 25-39 I took my godson on every trip and cruise I went on, sometimes just me and him other times when he sister was older I took her too. I sure as heck and not a pediphile and couldn't have loved those kids anymore if they were mine, nothing other than that. Sure would have been sad if we never got to do any of that stuff before my godson died because someone thought it did not look right and jumped to conclusions about our relationship.

 

[ilovejack02]

I dont see anything wrong with a Godparent taking a Godchild on vacation.
I cant imagine asking someone to please be my child's Godparent and help guide him in his spirituality and life, but no you cant take him anywhere cuz it might look bad.

 

[Mermaid02]

I think this is the problem: The assumption that all situations where a man (the child's godfather) is 19 years older than a boy must unequivocally be nefarious. I bet that 99.9% of the time, such situations are not only innocent, but beneficent. While the 0.1% for men translates to 0.0001% for women, there is still something bad about making the assumption that whenever there is a situation like this, that it must be one of those 0.1% situations. And I think this problem feeds on itself, and can even result in a lot of really bad situations, where men won't come to the assistance of a child for fear of how that interaction would be perceived.

I have to agree.

My son's kindergarten teacher was a man. Hands down the BEST teacher either of my children have EVER had. I couldn't believe the number of people in real life and on the boards who said they wouldn't like it if their kindergartener had a male teacher. All men aren't bad people. Mr. P gave up teaching to be a stay at home Dad.... he has the LUCKIEST kid in the world.

As far as this story goes, we don't know enough to judge.

 

[Mermaid02]

Exactly....you know are forced to question his character. To NOT do so is folly and the reason why kids are put into danger imo.

Question his character IF he tried to commit suicide.... I'm not accusing anyone of pedophilia without a heck of a lot more though. Maybe the guy was drinking too much- decided he missed his ex wife and couldn't go on without her..... all speculation of course....but just as likely as anything else.

 

[bicker]

Exactly....you know are forced to question his character.

Well, I'm not really forced to -- police officers are, perhaps, and social services folks are forced to, as well, but I feel I should just wait until we know something more.

 

[Cool-Beans]

Exactly....you know are forced to question his character. To NOT do so is folly and the reason why kids are put into danger imo.

Questioning the character (or judgement) of a guy who jumped off a ship and assuming anyone who takes a kid on vacation is a pervert are two entirely different things.

I think we're all having different conversations, lol.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

 

[KristiKelly]

What parent would let a 35 year old man take a 16 year old on a cruise? But then why would a 35 year old hang around with a 16 year old boy?
Can you say pedophile. Something is not right.

My 1st thought.

Now, I'll go read the rest of the posts.

 

[suzij13]

I know that there are several close friends of our family's that my parents would not think twice about them taking me and my brothers and sisters any where. I think that my mom and dad would trust us to these people more then to some of my aunts and uncles. That being said I don't think any one is going to be taking the 6 of us on vacation any time soon.

 

[Disney-Kim]

Maybe they are buddies and the older guy thought it would be cool to take the younger one partying on a cruise where they could drink and get chicks. maybe the younger one was drunk too????
it doesn't have to be perverted you know.....

 

[eeyore45]

Thanks for the link, on the Today show the boy was saying he was handcuffed by security, and that really confused me - according to the article he was handcuffed because they thought the boy pushed the man off the deck on purpose. The man's family is driving to Miama to see him in the hospital, the boy is going with them (he said that on the Today show too)

Now what does this mean?

I wanted to have a good time, and the boat was starting to get boring," Sal said. "He just started freaking out."

The teen said they scuffled and the older man slipped on the room's balcony's wet deck. He held Mankamyer down until security officers -- called by neighbors -- showed up.

I think Sal (the boy) was held down until the security officers showed up, but for the life of me who is "he"? Mankamyer is the man that 'fell' overboard.

Just a really weird story.

And my dad has a "beer belly" nowhere near 300# (200# probably!) and he can float... he used to teach us kids, he would put his hands behind his head and just lay in the water - it takes practice arching the back, but it can be done w/o treading water - my grandparents would do this, and fall asleep, all floating!! They grew up near the Gulf of Mexico... not in 4 foot waves mind you, but I can imagine how he survived...

how he was found, that was the miracle!! A true needle in a haystack!!

Another weird thing on the Today Show was the captain of the cruise line (or spokesman, since I"m not sure which) said as soon as they were notified the ship stopped, and turned about! (hmm, can you imagine, they go pretty fast dont they?)

 

[Poppinsme]

I will amend what I said. Maybe not use the wording "Can you say pedophile".
But once again would you let a 16 year old boy go on a cruise with a 35 year old man? Would you want your son or daughter around someone drinking alcohol alone with your child? If you say you had no idea that the adult would be drinking, bingo. Things happen under the influence of alcohol some not to nice. Why take a chance? And its not hysteria or wrong to not trust a man being alone with a child. Is it a shame? Yes it is but its reality and thank god for the media bringing out all the cases of child molestation. Because you cant trust anybody anymore and need to be vigilant. And I went on trips with close friends of my parents. And I was molested by a pedophile when I was 13 and he was 35. Maybe I'm more cautious then the next person but GOOD, nothing wrong with that. No I don't think all situations between men and boys are sexual when there friends. I just think going on a vacation alone with a 35 year old man is not to wise. Nuff said.
One more thing there are plenty of people who think that there is nothing wrong with a man loving a boy or having sex with a boy. Or would say that nothing is wrong with a 16 year old having sex with a 35 year old. (I'm not saying this situation at all, just a generalization.)

 

[phillybeth]

I seriously doubt most would make the same assumptions if this were a female adult involved.

Actually I would. I think it unwise in this day and age for anyone not related to a child to be alone with them in any circumstance. I don't let my DH take our neices/nephews to the movies alone.

 

[phillybeth]

Maybe they are buddies and the older guy thought it would be cool to take the younger one partying on a cruise where they could drink and get chicks. maybe the younger one was drunk too????
it doesn't have to be perverted you know.....

But that is wrong as well.

 

[NewJersey]

Actually I would. I think it unwise in this day and age for anyone not related to a child to be alone with them in any circumstance. I don't let my DH take our neices/nephews to the movies alone.

Really? I guess I'm naive or something, then.

Geez, I hope my sister lets me babysit/spend time with her kids, whenever she decides to have them.

 

[NewJersey]

But that is wrong as well.

Wrong? Yes. Perverted like being accused of being a pedofile? No.

 

[phillybeth]

I'm jaded because of my line of work. I've seen too many cases of babysitter, uncle, aunt, family friend, godparent, older cousin, sexually and/or physically abusing a child in their care. I've also seen plenty of cases where it's the parent, stepparent, or current romantic interest.

Regardless, there is still something skeevy about a 35 YO man taking a 16 YO boy on a cruise.

 

[Poppinsme]

I'm jaded because of my line of work. I've seen too many cases of babysitter, uncle, aunt, family friend, godparent, older cousin, sexually and/or physically abusing a child in their care. I've also seen plenty of cases where it's the parent, stepparent, or current romantic interest.

Regardless, there is still something skeevy about a 35 YO man taking a 16 YO boy on a cruise.

I agree. Maybe WE are in the minority on this one.

 

[Cool-Beans]

Actually I would. I think it unwise in this day and age for anyone not related to a child to be alone with them in any circumstance. I don't let my DH take our neices/nephews to the movies alone.

I think that's a little over the top. Are you actually worried that your husband is a pervert or are you just worried that people will see him and think he is?

I took kids I was baby-sitting (overnight )to Chuck E. Cheese yesterday. Their parents thanked me.

 

[Virgo10]

Wait a minute - are we now putting this guy to death after convicting him of being a pedophile???

There are certainly cases in which an older man and a teen might have a sexual relationship, and this might be one of them, but there are also thousands and thousands of situations where an older man who is a legitimate family friend might take a teen boy on a trip. I'm not ready to bury him under the jail yet. He might just have been drunk...

That was my thought too. Believe it or not, older people can befriend younger ones and sex is not always in the mix. Do we ever hear about it happening in this extreme society we live in? Rarely and it's usually buried on the back page.

Two instances: When I was in my late teens and early 20's, two of my best friends were a couple in their 50's.

My son babysat for two boys when they were pre-teens. He was in his late 20's. Their family treated him like a third son and when the kids, now 18 and 16, grew up he treated them more like peers than the kids he use to watch. And gee, I don't know how to break this to you, but it was not an X rated relationship. They were just friends.

Bad things happen but so do good things. I'm not willing to hang this guy yet. Getting the whole story would be nice.