SuiteDisney
<font color=CC66CC>Short Post Man cracks me up!<br
- Joined
- Nov 25, 2001
- Messages
- 4,731
St . Mom's Wort
Plant extract that treats mom's depression
by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to six hours.
------
EmptyNestrogen
Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy
by enhancing the memory of how awful they were as
teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.
------
Peptobimbo
Liquid silicone for single women.
Two full cups swallowed before an evening out
increases breast size, decreases intelligence and improves flirting.
------
Dumerol
When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause
dangerously low I.Q. causing enjoyment of country western music.
------
Flipitor
Increases life expectancy of commuters by
controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.
------
Anti-boy-otics
When administered to teenage girls, is highly
effective in improving grades, freeing up phone
lines, and reducing money spent on make-up.
------
Menicillin
Potent antiboyotic for older women.
Increases resistance to such lines as, "You make me want
to be a better person .......can we get naked now?"
------
Buyagra
Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping.
Increases potency and duration of spending spree.
------
Extra Strength Buy-One-All
When combined with Buyagra, can cause an
indiscriminate buying frenzy so severe the victim
may even come home with a Donnie Osmond CD
or a book by Dr. Laura.
------
JackAsspirin
Relieves the headache caused by a man who can't
remember your birthday, anniversary or phone number.
------
Anti-talksident
A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone
too eager to share their life stories with total strangers.
------
Sexcedrin
Bedroom aerosol spray for men.
More effective than Excedrin in treating the,
"Not now, dear, I have a headache," syndrome.
------
Ragamet
When administered to a husband, provides the
same irritation as ragging on him all weekend,
saving the wife the time and trouble of doing it herself.
<<< N O T I C E >>>
Always consult your family physician before taking new medication
Plant extract that treats mom's depression
by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to six hours.
------
EmptyNestrogen
Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy
by enhancing the memory of how awful they were as
teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.
------
Peptobimbo
Liquid silicone for single women.
Two full cups swallowed before an evening out
increases breast size, decreases intelligence and improves flirting.
------
Dumerol
When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause
dangerously low I.Q. causing enjoyment of country western music.
------
Flipitor
Increases life expectancy of commuters by
controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.
------
Anti-boy-otics
When administered to teenage girls, is highly
effective in improving grades, freeing up phone
lines, and reducing money spent on make-up.
------
Menicillin
Potent antiboyotic for older women.
Increases resistance to such lines as, "You make me want
to be a better person .......can we get naked now?"
------
Buyagra
Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping.
Increases potency and duration of spending spree.
------
Extra Strength Buy-One-All
When combined with Buyagra, can cause an
indiscriminate buying frenzy so severe the victim
may even come home with a Donnie Osmond CD
or a book by Dr. Laura.
------
JackAsspirin
Relieves the headache caused by a man who can't
remember your birthday, anniversary or phone number.
------
Anti-talksident
A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone
too eager to share their life stories with total strangers.
------
Sexcedrin
Bedroom aerosol spray for men.
More effective than Excedrin in treating the,
"Not now, dear, I have a headache," syndrome.
------
Ragamet
When administered to a husband, provides the
same irritation as ragging on him all weekend,
saving the wife the time and trouble of doing it herself.
<<< N O T I C E >>>
Always consult your family physician before taking new medication