Neighborhoods evolve; Remember why you picked yours.

[DawnCt1]

Let me preface this by saying that I love my neighborhood and my neighbors, (for the most part). When we moved to our house 22 years ago, we moved to a street with 13 homes and 22 kids between the ages of 1 and 10. It was a great place for kids. They could play in the street and those without children had to "suck it up". They did. Now, 22 years later the street is evolving. There is one family with two very young children that play behind their fenced in yard. There is another family with three children they love to play in their driveway and the street. All of our kids did. The rest of the 22 kids? They are in their 20's and 30's. The parents have forgotten what its like to have kids play in the street. There are 6 dogs on the street. 3 are labs and they bark from their invisible fences for short periods of time during the day. I live across from one and two doors down from another. Honestly, I don't hear them. They never go out after dark.
I went to a birthday party tonight for one of my neighbors. Other neighbors were there. I was very sad to hear that two of my neighbors are upset about barking dogs and children playing in the street. He spoke to them about their kids playing in the street and leaving toys in the driveway that he could see and the garage door open. After the "offending couple" left, he told me that he was relieved that there was no "ill feelings". I knew there wouldn't be. The parents of the younger children are wonderful people. They want not to offend. Their dog is very sweet and occasionally barks. About 3 weeks ago, another neighbor with the two labs told me that she heard that a family was considering moving because of her barking dogs. We are probably going to move but it has to do with relocation, NOT DOGS. I was afraid she thought it was us! I don't hear her dogs. I assured her that it wasn't US. Frankly, if I didn't want to see children and hear dogs, I would move to an "adult community" and watch my neighbors grow old and die. I wouldn't have to see or hear children playing in the street, see toys in the driveway or hear dogs. I don't want to live like that. If you live on a street with houses that are 3000 sq. feet and 4 bedrooms, ASSUME that there will be children and dogs. That is life. Remember when your children were young and were skateboarding in the street, playing street hockey and making noise. That's all!

 

[npmommie]

Let me preface this by saying that I love my neighborhood and my neighbors, (for the most part). When we moved to our house 22 years ago, we moved to a street with 13 homes and 22 kids between the ages of 1 and 10. It was a great place for kids. They could play in the street and those without children had to "suck it up". They did. Now, 22 years later the street is evolving. There is one family with two very young children that play behind their fenced in yard. There is another family with three children they love to play in their driveway and the street. All of our kids did. The rest of the 22 kids? They are in their 20's and 30's. The parents have forgotten what its like to have kids play in the street. There are 6 dogs on the street. 3 are labs and they bark from their invisible fences for short periods of time during the day. I live across from one and two doors down from another. Honestly, I don't hear them. They never go out after dark.
I went to a birthday party tonight for one of my neighbors. Other neighbors were there. I was very sad to hear that two of my neighbors are upset about barking dogs and children playing in the street. He spoke to them about their kids playing in the street and leaving toys in the driveway that he could see and the garage door open. After the "offending couple" left, he told me that he was relieved that there was no "ill feelings". I knew there wouldn't be. The parents of the younger children are wonderful people. They want not to offend. Their dog is very sweet and occasionally barks. About 3 weeks ago, another neighbor with the two labs told me that she heard that a family was considering moving because of her barking dogs. We are probably going to move but it has to do with relocation, NOT DOGS. I was afraid she thought it was us! I don't hear her dogs. I assured her that it wasn't US. Frankly, if I didn't want to see children and hear dogs, I would move to an "adult community" and watch my neighbors grow old and die. I wouldn't have to see or hear children playing in the street, see toys in the driveway or hear dogs. I don't want to live like that. If you live on a street with houses that are 3000 sq. feet and 4 bedrooms, ASSUME that there will be children and dogs. That is life. Remember when your children were young and were skateboarding in the street, playing street hockey and making noise. That's all!

wow thats quite nervy of your neighbor to speak to someone about their kids playing habits and toys etc in their driveway.
he doesn't want to see THEIR toys in THEIR driveway........

I hope and pray I never get that old farty.

 

[aprilgail2]

I can't believe anyone would complain about someone else kids playing in their own driveway!! Where would he LIKE them to play?? Most kids around here have basketball hoops in their driveways!
I am really happy with my block- up until now my 9 year old has been the "baby" of the block but we now have 4 kids tghat are each 1 1/2 old- how great for them having 4 kids the same age on the same block! Neighbors on both sides of me have 2 of these 4 kids so I am loving having little ones next door,they come over and my daughter plays with the babys on our front lawn and we go to their birthday parties and see them for christmas etc!

 

[DawnCt1]

wow thats quite nervy of your neighbor to speak to someone about their kids playing habits and toys etc in their driveway.
he doesn't want to see THEIR toys in THEIR driveway........

I hope and pray I never get that old farty.

I know. I am stunned. I love my neighbors but I think that that type of intolerance is a sign of "getting old"???? They are definitely type A. I have friends that have said that they couldn't live in my neighborhood. "Grass" is a big deal here. I guess "toys" are a bigger deal. The sad thing is, children grow up. They put away their toys and that is it. Also, those parents of young children have to put up with teenage drivers. I think I would prefer "toys".

 

[DawnCt1]

I can't believe anyone would complain about someone else kids playing in their own driveway!! Where would he LIKE them to play?? Most kids around here have basketball hoops in their driveways!
I am really happy with my block- up until now my 9 year old has been the "baby" of the block but we now have 4 kids tghat are each 1 1/2 old- how great for them having 4 kids the same age on the same block! Neighbors on both sides of me have 2 of these 4 kids so I am loving having little ones next door,they come over and my daughter plays with the babys on our front lawn and we go to their birthday parties and see them for christmas etc!

He told them that he couldn't say anything about them playing in their drive way but was not happy about the playing in the street and not putting stuff away at night. He said that he pointed out to them that while his DS played in the street, everything was put away out of sight. I can tell you that more often than not, a bicycle was left leaning up against my front steps and balls were left in the driveway.

 

[KirstenB]

we have a bike, a bigwheel, a kickball, and 2 kids' shovels in our front yard (the shovels are in case it snows---our youngest has a mild form of autism, and she's always vigilant for a snowstorm here in Virginia, in the summer!!)

Seriously, before we had kids, I loved seeing sidewalk chalk, bikes, skateboards, etc. To me it meant the neighborhood was Alive!! Now I am picky about my grass, flowerbeds, etc. I work hard to keep them well-tended. But I obviously don't mind seeing the kids' clutter at all.

 

[GeorgeG]

We knew we wanted to move to The Villages and when I retired things happened very fast up in New York. I retired Sept. 1st and we had to be out up there by October 14th when we hadn't actually gone to contract on a new house in Florida. We flew down and looked at a bunch of houses, all still under construction, and had one picked by 11:00 in the morning. The neighborhood, such as it was at the time, seemed like it was going to be nice. We signed the contract at 1:00 the same day and were promised a closing on October 14th.

As it turned out, the neighborhood is a great one, the house was finished, we closed on time and were the first in the neighborhood to move in. It's been four years and we still love it. Great neighborhood, great friends and neighbors, and no snow!

 

[watersbland]

We had a crabby neighbor like that when I was a kid. Occasionaly a basketball would get over her fence during a game of hoops and she would refuse to give it back until a parent could come over and ask for it. We knew better than to enter her yard without permission and never did but on the rare occasion it happened we would have to get another ball or wait til our mom could go over. My dad ended up putting up a higher section of fence in that area just so we didn't have to deal with the lady. She even complained to my parents that sidewalk our chalk drawings looked trashy and were subtracting from the beauty of her manicured yard. The neighborhood I live in now has lots of houses with young kids and our neighbors on both sides have todlers. We don't have any kids yet but seeing them out playing doesn't bother us a bit. I always think to myself that I don't want to turn into that crabby neighbor we had as kids.

 

[DawnCt1]

When our kids were little they played street hockey in the middle of the street with their kid's nets and hockey equipment. Granted, it was cleaned up after the game, but it didn't seem to bother them, then.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Why don't you say something to these people when they are complaining? Remind them of what their own kids used to do and tell them they sound like grumps now.

 

[PatsGirl]

I built my house 25 years ago hoping to start a neighborhood Five other house were built on the connecting road the first couple of years and nothing since. We all live on large parcels and so the houses are not close to each other. The other homes built came with older (teen) kids who had moved out by the time my kids were born. I so wish my kids had lived in a neighborhood. I would have gladly traded these "stepford" yards for street hockey nets and basketball hoops

 

[golfgal]

I remember playing in the street as a kid (and we lived on a busy street), our kids played in the street as little kids, NO ONE plays in the street here. It is really sad actually. Even the cul-de-sac behind us that gets NO traffic you don't see kids playing in the street. I miss our old neighborhood where there were kids running around all over the place. I miss hearing the kids yelling and having a blast in the summer. Maybe I should move to your neighborhood and you can send your grumpy neighbor here.

 

[shortbun]

When we moved here 22 years ago, we were childless-hoping to have children and looking for a great neighborhood to raise a family. Most of our original neighbors are gone but it's been a great neighborhood to raise kids. Even the childless old folks love kids and attend all the block parties. There IS one family who allows their children to play in a dangerous way IN the street. Cars line our street and these small children run in and out of parked cars aimlessly. I've never said anything to the parents but a couple of our neighbors have and it's caused a rift. The other day I noticed the 8yo moving the lawn with a gas powered push mower on a hill. I had to go inside, into the basement and work on the laudry for about 1/2 hour until he was done because it really made me nervous. We're moving as soon as we find a ranch that's big enough; my knees need to get off four flights of stairs.

 

[DawnCt1]

Why don't you say something to these people when they are complaining? Remind them of what their own kids used to do and tell them they sound like grumps now.

Oh I did. I talked about how nice it was when there were 22 kids on the street and how much they all enjoyed his DS's hockey equipment. He reminded me that it was "all picked up" by evening, etc. At this point in the conversation he wasn't particularly complaining but expressing relief that there were "no hard feelings" and what a nice conversation they had with their other neighbor about their dogs, etc. When our kids were little, we had a big golden retriever who never barked and a little toy poodle. Most of the dogs on the street, (5) were under 20 pounds and were inside dogs. Now there are 3 labs, one standard poodle, a maltese, two bichons, (one of whom crossed the rainbow bridge) a mini dachshund and a Jack Russell. Apparently only the labs are "offensive".
I agree, they sound like grumps now and its sad. I love my neighborhood and its sad to see a divide over age.

 

[DawnCt1]

When we moved here 22 years ago, we were childless-hoping to have children and looking for a great neighborhood to raise a family. Most of our original neighbors are gone but it's been a great neighborhood to raise kids. Even the childless old folks love kids and attend all the block parties. There IS one family who allows their children to play in a dangerous way IN the street. Cars line our street and these small children run in and out of parked cars aimlessly. I've never said anything to the parents but a couple of our neighbors have and it's caused a rift. The other day I noticed the 8yo moving the lawn with a gas powered push mower on a hill. I had to go inside, into the basement and work on the laudry for about 1/2 hour until he was done because it really made me nervous. We're moving as soon as we find a ranch that's big enough; my knees need to get off four flights of stairs.

In those situations, I think it is fine to say something. When the kids were little, one of the kids who lived at the entrance of the street, on a hill, would come shooting out of his driveway on his bike without looking. My other neighbor was turning into the street and if she wasn't going at a snail's pace, she would have hit him. She did talk to the parents about that, and it was appreciated. Safety is one thing and should concern everyone. Inconvenience, esthetics and noise is another. Those issues go away with time. Consider the parents of young children who have to put up with the sudden influx of teenage drivers when the kids on the street hit 16 and 17. Frankly, I prefer bikes and skateboards.

 

[disykat]

Where were you all on a recent "I can't believe people let their kids play in the street" thread where I was the lonely only defending playing in the street? We didn't do it often, but IMO one of the joys of living in a quiet neighborhood is the occasional pickup game in the street.

My most recent neighborhood upset was when a neighbor (young man, with no kids and I always thought a rather wild past) called all upset that there were gang members hanging around my house and hiding in my trees and he was going to call the police. I finally got him to accept that my 14 year old had brought some friends home with him after church and they were outside playing!

 

[golfgal]

Where were you all on a recent "I can't believe people let their kids play in the street" thread where I was the lonely only defending playing in the street? We didn't do it often, but IMO one of the joys of living in a quiet neighborhood is the occasional pickup game in the street.

My most recent neighborhood upset was when a neighbor (young man, with no kids and I always thought a rather wild past) called all upset that there were gang members hanging around my house and hiding in my trees and he was going to call the police. I finally got him to accept that my 14 year old had brought some friends home with him after church and they were outside playing!

We had a neighbor that hindsight probably had the beginning stages of Alzheimers, but stopped me in the back yard to tell me I shouldn't let DS play with the neighbor boy any more because she KNEW he was in a gang. She went on and on about the bandanna he was wearing was a gang symbol, etc. I thanked her for the warning and went inside and LAUGHED my head off. The boys were THREE at the time.

We had a family reunion a few years ago and one of the distant cousins came with their son. He was homeschooled and obviously never around any other kids and pretty brainwashed by his parents. He was about the same age as all of our kids and their cousins so we kept trying to get him to play with the kids. At one point he told us that all those kids were up on the deck doing drugs and drinking (at Grandma and Grandpas house next door to the park where the reunion was). They were all about NINE at the time . Yes, you little weirdo, we let out kids drink and do drugs out in the open in front of 250 people at a family reunion--especially DH's brother's kids because he is a cop and supports that kind of behavior .

 

[Skatermom23]

Remember when your children were young and were skateboarding in the street, playing street hockey and making noise. That's all!

I was noticing that the next generation of kids is starting to play out in the street, but it isn't like it used to be. When my kids were out playing, the parents would hang out and talk as well or at least pop out now and then to check on things. The kids were taught to not throw "hard" balls near the cars, to not run their bikes into someone elses stuff...basically to respect other peoples property and to be curtious of the time of day. This next set of kids has no parental supervision, no respect for property and no respect for early mornings...(someone was riding a power wheels up and down the street at 5am this morning)

I guess, some might say I am getting old because I have been known to complain now a days, but it is not the good old fashioned fun and noise I am opposed to. I just miss the days of respectful children.

 

[castleview]

How quickly some people forget...or gloss however how it was in their day. My own mother is constantly criticizing me about how I handle my kids - you know because she handled everything so perfectly.

Anyway, it's stories like these that make me happy that we live on a main road set way back. I lived in a close knit neighborhood growing up and it had its good (other kids) and bad points (lack of privacy).

Hopefully, when my kids are done with school I won't become one of those people who doesn't want their tax dollars going toward local schools.

 

[Disney Doll]

Well, I love the kids playing around the neighborhood, and I have no kids.

I do have that "one" neighbor...when they first moved in (and I mean 'first'...they had lived here about 2 weeks literally) the wife called my house one afternoon at about 2pm to complain that my dog had barked at a squirrel...3 barks...woof, woof, woof. Apparently she counted. I told her that when my dog was barking at a squirrel at 2 o'clock in the morning then she could call me. A while later she felt the need to comment on how we landscaped our yard...she didn't care for the 2 lovely ornamental plum trees that I put near my fence because they blocked her view of my house when she looked out her window (which was the point! ). Apparently she had been President of her condo association prior to moving to our neighborhood, so felt that she should have the same "authority" here in the neighborhood, where BTW we had no kind of HOA, because she had "experience dealing with these types of things". I told her when she paid my mortgage, she could tell me how to landscape my yard. She told another neighbor that she didn't like her landscape lighting, so that neighbor changed it. Me, I would have added more...my house and the Great Wall of China would have been the only 2 things visible from the moon!

Needless to say, if some neighbor told me that they didn't like my kids' toys being out in the yard, guess how many toys would be out in the yard?????