My wife's family does not want me at Thanksgiving

[DawnCt1]

Married for 15 years. Wife thinks the best approach is for her to spend one Holiday with her family on her own. I would go to my family (who like me!) on that date. My wife can not force her family to like me, can she?

No one can be "forced" to like anyone. She can however insist that they be polite to you if they want to spend time with her.

 

[MosMom]

I say you go and question them the entire time. I'm sure they'll adore you just like we all do after that visit.

 

[RobinMarie]

Quite frankly, if you sit and ask a whole bunch of questions like you do here, I wouldn't want you at my Thanskgiving gathering either!

I agree.

 

[dirtysouthinit]

That situation is a dream for me, I'd love to not have to see my inlaws.

 

[dg39]

Stay home with your wife and start your own holiday tradition.

 

[DawnCt1]

I say you go and question them the entire time. I'm sure they'll adore you just like we all do after that visit.

Lets assume that he 'questions' here for the purpose of engaging in a conversation on a forum. I think its unfair to assume that he behaves the same way in the "world".

 

[Galahad]

Stay home with your wife and start your own holiday tradition.

As soon as we had kids all holidays became "ours". All are welcome, but travel is at our discretion, not our parents'. When our kids have kids we'll expect the same.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

Quite frankly, if you sit and ask a whole bunch of questions like you do here, I wouldn't want you at my Thanskgiving gathering either!

I was waiting for an answer like this. Who knows if it's even a legit problem--could be just another way of asking a question.

But, if it by chance is a legit question, I say that you and you wife should stick together and not let her family decide that you two should be apart for a holiday. Again, if this is legit, why don't they like you?

 

[MrsNick]

Your wife should stay home and tell her parents why.

Exactly.

 

[answerer]

What should we do?

I think you should go with her anyway & stay off the computer while you are there or they might think it is rude. Stay for quite awhile just to make sure you've warmed them up to you again.

 

[chyam]

Quite frankly, if you sit and ask a whole bunch of questions like you do here, I wouldn't want you at my Thanskgiving gathering either!

Wow.........you are a woman who thinks like me...........perhaps he can get "C" to invite him to their house!

 

[mickeyboat]

I think you should go with her anyway & stay off the computer while you are there or they might think it is rude. Stay for quite awhile just to make sure you've warmed them up to you again.

Good answer, questioner. I mean answerer. Whatever.

Denae

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I think you should go with her anyway & stay off the computer while you are there or they might think it is rude. Stay for quite awhile just to make sure you've warmed them up to you again.

I must have missed something--when did he say they didn't like him being on the computer? I didn't realize that was part of the problem.

 

[scanne]

Bad karma is one thing. Bad manners, another. I'm sorry but your wife's family sounds very nasty! I'm not thrilled about my DH's family - but I would NEVER be so rude as to not include them in holidays, kids' birthdays, etc. My first reaction when I read your post was how hurt you must be. Then it turned to anger when I read your remark about bad karma. That is no excuse to treat someone with such disrespect!

I hope your wife sees that she and you are a "team" and that she shouldn't go without you. If her parents don't understand that, then it's their problem.

JMHO.

 

[DawnCt1]

I must have missed something--when did he say they didn't like him being on the computer? I didn't realize that was part of the problem.

I agree. I think its unfair to respond to the OP with the assumption that the inlaws have any reason to dislike him. It is perfectly reasonable to respond to the question and not assume anything else. He asked a perfectly reasonable question, not unlike other inlaw issues that have been raised here before and I think he deserves sincere answers.

 

[MosMom]

My wife was told by her parents that they really do not like me. What should we do?

That is what tipped me off that the inlaws don't like him.

 

[sarhenty]

Good answer, questioner. I mean answerer. Whatever.

Denae

LOL!

 

[Marseeya]

If I were in your shoes, this would be me: Seeya!

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Married for 15 years. Wife thinks the best approach is for her to spend one Holiday with her family on her own. I would go to my family (who like me!) on that date. My wife can not force her family to like me, can she?

It would have been more appropriate for your wife to shoulder the idea then place blame with the parents, if indeed she wanted to entertain their request.
Her parents made a suggestion and instead of putting them in their appropriate place she threw it in your face.

Now if you don't care that she goes to your family and you go to yours, then it is a non-issue.

I guess the question for you questioner, is do you care, who goes where?

 

[Mermaid02]

Married for 15 years. Wife thinks the best approach is for her to spend one Holiday with her family on her own. I would go to my family (who like me!) on that date. My wife can not force her family to like me, can she?

No, but they should tolerate you for HER sake. They sound like a great bunch. NOT!