My kids are such "model citizens".....

[Not so Dumbo]

I don't know how they got this way, I certainly didn't incourage it and wish I could stop it. Lord, knows how hard I've tried, but it goes in one ear and out the other.

We've been to Disney 3 times. The first time they were happy to go, but the next two they weren't grateful at all to be there. In fact, they complained a couple of times about having to go.
This bothered me but not the extent it does now, after the conversation I had with the neighbor girl.
Earlier this year we had a family move in nextdoor, they are a single parent family and moved from the inner-city. The neighbor girl came over to play with my kids and after a while she came to sit by me in the garage. While we were sitting there she spotted a large plastic WDW bag that was now being used as a storage bag for some fake flowers. She gasped and said, you all got to go to Disney world? I said yes,(didn't tell her that is was our 3rd trip) we went in May. Her eyes lit up and she said, Did you all get to see the big castle? I said yes and she asked if we got to see the big bed and apartment. I told her no, but we were able to walk through the castle. The conversation went on for a bit longer, but the point that struck me was that she was so excited that she knew someone that got to go to Disney world and here my kids are to the point that the excitment of going to Disney World is that of maybe going to the local park for the day.
I swear, if something doesn't change, I'm going to leave them home and take her instead. Okay, vent over. Anyone expierencing a simular situation, or are my kids the only "model citizens" at WDW?

 

[thegrimdwarf]

I don't have a similar problem, but I am wondering this - if your kids don't want to go, why are you taking them? Disney is a pricey trip, and if my kids weren't interested in going, they wouldn't be going. Can you leave them with a relative, while you and your husband do a kid-free trip? That's what I'd be looking to do.

Plus, I think if you let them know that their disinterest has gotten them off the hook, their tune might change.

 

[bonzarella]

In case it helps, you are not alone. My kids have actually asked to go elsewhere for vacation. I recently had someone say to me "kids who have everything, appreciate nothing" If your neighbor child has a sibling, I'll fund their trip

 

[mjantz]

Then why not let them help plan a trip somewhere else? My kids love Disney but I think if we went there every year they'd get tired of it too.
IMO, I don't think they're ungrateful, they just want to go somewhere other than Disney. Personally if I went the same place every year on vacation I'd get bored as well.

 

[cigarboo]

I'm in the same boat. We've been going to Disney about 2x year since DS was in my tummy. Now he's 7 and he complains about going anywhere. We just got back from Hawaii and for months before the trip, I just heard complaining. Asked if he would like to go to Disney for his birthday in Oct... He just shrugs his shoulders. A Disney cruise? Say's "maybe." My 5yo wants to go everywhere. Maybe it's the age. My 7yo would rather just stay at home and play on his DS, watch TV or play on his computer. I blame myself for introducing those things so early in life. His attitude makes me not want to take him anywhere....However, because of his addiction to non social, sedentary activities, I feel I have no choice but to MAKE him go on vacation. It drives me crazy they don't appreciate all that they have, but I suppose I created that. I am thinking about taking a break from all vacations to see if maybe one day they'll actually ask to go somewhere. Maybe then they'll appreciate being able to go. We pretty much go everywhere together, so I would not consider going and leaving them at home. I understand if he doesn't share my enthusiasm for Disney, but it seems he doesn't want to go anywhere these days.

 

[DISNEYFOS]

Well I guess I wouldn't expect the same excitement of the first trip, but are they literally complaining about being there?? I would maybe see where else they want to go on vacation like the PP said.... Are they complaining about anything in particular about the trip.

We've been a lot since my DD was born and I think she just assumes that everyone goes there for vacation.. but I'm not sure she's ungrateful she just doesn't know any different. She is still excited to go, though.. (she's younger too).

I guess what I'm saying..Because we go so often and that is all she knows, I'm not expecting her to think that its special (its just somewhere we go for vacation)..or to really know anything about not be able to go? Does that make sense?

 

[geniegirl]

How about doing a service related trip or weekend around home to help them realize that they have it good and that so many others dont have what they have. Maybe then they would be greatful for what they got. I know we are spoiling our adopted son but when he gets older we will be doing community service items so he can give back to those who do not have what he has been given.

Go on a mission trip, build houses for the poor or just help out at the food kitchen then they may see that the world is not about getting but giving and they may appriciate all you give to them more.

 

[Not so Dumbo]

Part of the problem is that DH and I have become disney-aholics and since the kids are too young to stay home alone, they have to come along. Also, like PP said, they really wouldn't appreciate going anywhere. They like Disney World, but not enough to appreciate it. DH has already "threatned" them with leaving them home if they don't straighten out, but they quickly figured out how to call his bluff.
It was just a real eye opener to see someone who is so nice want to go there, but can't and here my kids can but don't appreciate it. Obviously telling them that they are lucky to be able to go to WDW and many kids don't ever get to go hasn't worked, just wondering if there is another way.

 

[mjantz]

Have you asked them where'd they'd want to go? My kids are about the age of your 2 & if you asked them where they'd want to go they have very specific places (DS wants to go to Legoland & DD wants to go to LA. Internationally DS wants to go to Parc Asterix outside Paris & DD wants to see the Mona Lisa).
I had a friend in college who had never been anywhere except Disney for vacations growing up. She honestly was completely burned out & wished she'd been other places.

 

[imthatgirl]

idk, i think you are being a bit unfair to your kids. if they have expressed discontent with going to DW, yet you bring them anyway, why should they get all excited? i think its a bit strange that after only 3 trips your kids arent into it anymore, but to each his own i guess.
if they would like to go somewhere else, why not try to see where else they would like to go?
as for the neighbor, well of course shes starry eyed, she hasnt been. ive never been to italy, but i have a friend who was born there and goes back every summer. i get starry eyed about her pictures and stories, but its just home to her and her kids. her kids dont get excited to go, but why should they? they actually hate leaving for the summer.

 

[SherylWrites]

appreciate nothing. That's my niece and nephew to a "t".
A few trips a year, all the activities/toys/video games etc that they want. And they don't appreciate any of it.
My kids have been to Disney once and we're surprising them in September with their second trip. It's what I wanted for my birthday this year, a family trip. Will they be surprised and grateful? I think so, because they typically have to earn what they get.
When we went last year, they saved all of their money for spending (took them 8 months to do it). We didn't give them a dime extra. They used allowance, birthday money etc. It was hard for them, but they sure appreciated it at the park.
When they wanted a Wii game system, they had to save up half of the money for it and any game after they would have to pay for. They did that and we honoured our promise. They treat it respectfully and it's a pretty big deal because they bugged us for a year for that game! lol No way was I shelling out $500 for it and the accessories.
My ds (10) is saving pop cans to recycle - he has about 15lbs at the moment (in Canada we don't pay a deposit, but you can take them in by the pound and get money per pound for the aluminum).
My dd (12) is just starting to babysit. Both are earning money on top of their allowance now.
They get presents at birthdays and Christmas. That's it. They're not spoiled and I hope that as the years go by, they will keep appreciating the value of a dollar and how difficult it is to earn it. It's not an easy task as a parent, you just have to keep on it.
If the kids don't want to go, then don't take them. Find something else to do as a family. Have a weekly game night or picnics, whatever. It doesn't have to cost money.

 

[imthatgirl]

Part of the problem is that DH and I have become disney-aholics and since the kids are too young to stay home alone, they have to come along. Also, like PP said, they really wouldn't appreciate going anywhere. They like Disney World, but not enough to appreciate it. DH has already "threatned" them with leaving them home if they don't straighten out, but they quickly figured out how to call his bluff.
It was just a real eye opener to see someone who is so nice want to go there, but can't and here my kids can but don't appreciate it. Obviously telling them that they are lucky to be able to go to WDW and many kids don't ever get to go hasn't worked, just wondering if there is another way.

another way? dont go anymore. or at least for a couple years. i understand that you want to go, but i guess if you want to teach them some kind of lesson? you would have to give that up.

 

[ChrisandDon'sMommy]

Could it be that it's time to change your vacation plans? Maybe they are bored. It doesn't have to do with being unappreciative of what you've done. Maybe it's time to switch it up.

 

[disneyin2008]

I wonder if you can talk to the neighbor girl's mom and see if she could afford to either take the trip with your family....or since that's sometimes too hard for a single family, if she'd be able to pay for a MYW ticket for her daughter and some food money (or if you're on the DDP it's like $10 a day right?) and you COULD bring her along.

The light in a child's eyes when they first arrive at Disney might even be worth paying for the kid yourself, if you can afford it. I mean, really, there are already 5 of you, so you likely aren't in a value anyway, so what would one more kid be in the room. It shouldn't cost any more right? So that leaves, tickets, food and souveniors. Two months isn't quite long enough to be able to do much car washing or lemonade selling to raise some money with her, or maybe it could?

Maybe it would help your kids get excited if they knew they'd be planning to make this little girl's dream come true? And, it might help them with being grateful for all that they have.

 

[Dr_Finkelstein]

Well the first time we went our kids were just about to turn 4 and my wife and I had been before so were really really excited. I think our mistake was that we expected the kids would simply light up with joy the second we entered the Magic Kingdom. I would not go as far as to say they were ingrates but they dont always understand that yes we do need to walk to get to the attractions and yes there are indeed queues and no you cannot just go straight up to the characters, neither do they appreciate the cost and effort involved in planning this sort of trip. After a couple of days of frustration we realised that kids view it in a different way from us. I still remember seeing the Disney castle popping up on the specials we used to get on tv here and dreaming of going, but that was 30+ years ago, when flying from Scotland to the US WAS a dream-once-in-a-lifetime-holiday only a very few people got to do. Now, everyone and their auntie goes. However, it is all worth it for those moments when they do get caught up in the magic.
Kids nowadays!

 

[lynn71092]

I wonder if you can talk to the neighbor girl's mom and see if she could afford to either take the trip with your family....or since that's sometimes too hard for a single family, if she'd be able to pay for a MYW ticket for her daughter and some food money (or if you're on the DDP it's like $10 a day right?) and you COULD bring her along.

The light in a child's eyes when they first arrive at Disney might even be worth paying for the kid yourself, if you can afford it. I mean, really, there are already 5 of you, so you likely aren't in a value anyway, so what would one more kid be in the room. It shouldn't cost any more right? So that leaves, tickets, food and souveniors. Two months isn't quite long enough to be able to do much car washing or lemonade selling to raise some money with her, or maybe it could?

Maybe it would help your kids get excited if they knew they'd be planning to make this little girl's dream come true? And, it might help them with being grateful for all that they have.

I agree, is there any way possible that you could take her?
Maybe if your kids see whow excited she gets they'll realize how someone else sees Disney!

 

[Nie0214]

I don't understand this "kids who have everything, appreciate nothing" phrase some of you are throwing around. Disney World is not every adult's cup-of-tea, and just like adults, some children don't love it like us here on the DIS do.

Instead of forcing kids to go to Disney because you feel like that is the ultimate vacation, maybe get the kids involved and into choosing something else to do. It might not be that they're unappreciative, but just that they feel like you're not taking into consideration their ideas on fun vacations and making them go to Disney just because you want to.

Not trying to come off as rude or anything, just trying to word the situation as best as I can from the eyes of the child. My younger brother (16) is not into rollercoasters and really didn't like being brought with my mom and I (who love them) to a bunch of amusement parks. That's why we actually listened to him and decided not to go to Cedar Point this year, because he doesn't like coasters and felt like he wasn't part of the trip at all.

 

[Not so Dumbo]

idk, i think you are being a bit unfair to your kids. if they have expressed discontent with going to DW, yet you bring them anyway, why should they get all excited? i think its a bit strange that after only 3 trips your kids arent into it anymore, but to each his own i guess.
if they would like to go somewhere else, why not try to see where else they would like to go?
as for the neighbor, well of course shes starry eyed, she hasnt been. ive never been to italy, but i have a friend who was born there and goes back every summer. i get starry eyed about her pictures and stories, but its just home to her and her kids. her kids dont get excited to go, but why should they? they actually hate leaving for the summer.

I think you may be right.
We have plans to go back in October. We are planning this as a surprise trip. It's my last attempt at getting them excited and appreciate the trip. My thinking is that maybe if it's a surprise and they don't have months of knowing about the trip, they will be more excited to go. After this one, it'll be a few years before we go back. We bought AP's for this year, so once those are up, we will be done for quite a while.

My kids don't express interest in going anywhere. So I wouldn't know where to start with finding a place that they would enjoy. They seem to think everything is boring. Hopefully it's just the age that they are at.

Please don't think that we give them everything they want. If you knew DH and myself you would know how silly that idea sounds. DH especially is the biggest tightwad on the block. Ever heard the one about making change from the collection plate..... that would be DH (just kidding) but he is just about that tight. So they've never been given every gaget under the sun. They also had to save their money to spend on the trips and it didn't make a difference in how careful they were to spend it or how much they appreciated what they bought.

 

[DISNEYFOS]

i think its a bit strange that after only 3 trips your kids arent into it anymore, but to each his own i guess.
if they would like to go somewhere else, why not try to see where else they would like to go?.

So it does seem a bit weird that only 3 trips and they are all done..I mean you really saw everything there is to see??

We are still finding new things to do..

I'm mean if you are trying to teach them empathy..then having them use their allowance for toys for tots..working in soup kitchen any type of volunteering might help with that.. A friend has a neat little piggy bank that has spend, save and donate and you choose how you want to distribute your allowance.

but in regards to Disney..Maybe you touring style is wearing them out? Is it a lot of run run run..waiting in line...Do you go during busy busy times? Hot hot weather? Maybe they would like to hang at the pool or Disney Quest.....or a Disney Fishing trip...whatever 7/8 year old boys like to do ...
Just some thoughts..

 

[Darcy03231]

My kids are lucky enough to be well travelled. Not only have we taken multiple trips to WDW, they've been all over the Carribean, Mexico and South America. This year I decided I wanted to go back to WDW (we haven't been since 2000, other than one night last summer for Pirates & Princesses). Both kids were very vocal in that they did not want to go. My solution was to book a trip for me and my niece who has never been (she's 4). DD (16, almost 17) was fine with it. She actually said she thought it was a great idea. DS (14, almost 15) on the other hand is pretty disgruntled over now being left out of a trip. We're going in October when school is in session so he can't go. Not only are his grades not great but we have block scheduling so there is no way he can miss a week of school. DS figured that because he didn't want to go to WDW I would book a vacation somewhere else. The next time I come up with vacation plans I doubt very much that he will say he doesn't want to go there!