My house is not your vacation home

[dnoyes]

Well buy a camper and see who all comes out of the wood works and think that they can just " borrow it" for a weekend....just amazing.

I own a Boat and RV Dealership. Enough said ...

 

[Sneezie]

Check my location.


/thread.

Can you hop over to St. Maarten and ship me some Guavaberry?

 

[DisneyBamaFan]

I own a Boat and RV Dealership. Enough said ...

Ouch...

 

[diznygirl]

Check my location.


/thread.

I'll let you visit me if I can visit you!

I own a Boat and RV Dealership. Enough said ...

Maybe I'll need a boat in St. Croix......

 

[Sneezie]

I live alone in a three bedroom home. So, of course, I always "have room" for visiting family members. That's what they think!

My aunt (actually my uncle's wife) will come to visit from time to time and "invites" herself into your home. She will actually call and say "I'm coming down and will stay with you for a while." She is a HORRIBLE house guests. Stays up all night eating your food, leaving trash (and personal items) everywhere, leaving her kids there for you to babysit while she runs the strees and unexpectedly extending her stay for days and sometimes weeks longer.

She's never stayed at my house and got the shock of her life when she cornered me and said, "Oh, we could come and stay at your house for a few days."

My response: "No, you can't."

Her: "But you live alone, don't you?"

Me: "Yep, I live alone, and that's the way I like it."

The conversation was a bit longer, but that's the gist of it. Needless to say, her trip was cut surprisingly short that year.

On another note, we have a cousin who lives in Altamonte Springs, FL, and they are always asking us to visit when we are in WDW, but I really don't like imposing on people and really don't have time to "visit" when I'm at WDW so we always refuse.

 

[kaytieeldr]

I have a slightly different opinion. I feel that it never hurts to ask, because the person I'm asking can always just say "no". If they say "no" then no hurt feelings on my part!

But you've put the homeowner in the awkward position of having to say no; plus, it's just bad manners to invite yourself somewhere.

What if the person has trouble saying no? Many people do. I don't, at least not on behalf of other people and I'm pretty good at handling my own "noes" as well. Not everyone is like that.

 

[ZPT1022]

Well buy a camper and see who all comes out of the wood works and think that they can just " borrow it" for a weekend....just amazing.

Wow. My aunt and uncle have a camper that they never use and I asked them if they'd consider RENTING it to me when my kids are a little bigger, but I offered to pay a deposit just in case and also a weekly rental fee. I'd also pay my uncle probably a few hundred dollars to bring it to the campsite for us (20 minutes from where we all live) and help us set it up. I felt kind of bad asking them to consider renting something they aren't using but to expect it for free???? Wow!




OP, just say no. I can't imagine just inviting myself up there. Asking for area info from someone who knows the area? Absolutely. Making plans to get together if we were up there at the same time? Absolutely. But I really cannot imagine inviting myself. Maybe we are weird or too private but I like having my space and I would always feel like I was imposing and I had to tiptoe around all the time, constantly cleaning up after myself and my kids. That's not really enjoyable

 

[kaytieeldr]

You mean you don't loan out your truck to pull your camper too??? What kind of friends ARE you???

Oh, I'm sure she's as willing to lend out her truck as she is to lend out the camper... to those savvy enough to ask

 

[kaytieeldr]

I own a Boat and RV Dealership. Enough said ...

Awesome! Do you mind if I borrow a...

 

[bettymae1121]

But you've put the homeowner in the awkward position of having to say no; plus, it's just bad manners to invite yourself somewhere.

What if the person has trouble saying no? Many people do. I don't, at least not on behalf of other people and I'm pretty good at handling my own "noes" as well. Not everyone is like that.

I just don't see why it would be awkward for the homeowner. If I was the person with vacation home (or whatever) and someone asked me and I had a problem with it...I'd just politely say it wasn't possible and move on. If they got upset about it, that's their problem. But not everyone is wired like me, I suppose.

I guess I just see it as this. For all you know, that person loves to let others use their vacation home, and would be happy to let you use it. Or, they really want it for their own private use, or just don't feel comfortable having others use it while they're not there, or whatever. But you don't know if you don't ask. Now, if one is going to ask, they need to do it nicely, and they need to be willing to take "no" as an answer and not give the person a hard time about it. Giving someone grief over something like this is 100% totally rude beyond all messures of rudeness.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Wow, this thread makes the "can I have half of your sandwich" thread look nice!!!!

IMHO, nobody has the right to ask anyone for their property or stuff unless it has been offered.

Since when is it ever okay to even ask?
How presumptuous.
Since when is it ever a nice thing to put somebody in the awkward position of having to disappoint you by having to say 'no'.

Wow, too many people just have no awareness of personal boundaries at all. One of my pet peeves, actually.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

Wow, this thread makes the "can I have half of your sandwich" thread look nice!!!!

IMHO, nobody has the right to ask anyone for their property or stuff unless it has been offered.

Since when is it ever okay to even ask?
How presumptuous.
Since when is it ever a nice thing to put somebody in the awkward position of having to disappoint you by having to say 'no'.

Wow, too many people just have no awareness of personal boundaries at all. One of my pet peeves, actually.

LOL, "personal boundaries" are subjective. I don't have a problem in the world with people asking to borrow something I own.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Yeah, but just don't think you can have my food or my house!!!

Anyhow, unless a person has offered or indicated that it is okay... it is not the asker who determines the boundary... it is the owner.

That is the kicker.

Apparently, the consensus here is that many people have been asked, when it is clearly not within what they are willing and/or comfortable with.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

Yeah, but just don't think you can have my food or my house!!!

Anyhow, unless a person has offered or indicated that it is okay... it is not the asker who determines the boundary... it is the owner.

This owner doesn't have a problem with people asking. I can't imagine why people are so offended. If you don't like sharing, say "no."

 

[Wishing on a star]

Sorry, we continue to continue to agree to disagree, in a big way.

If an owner indicates that this is something they will consider. Then Okay.
Otherwise, one should not be presumptuous to even ask.

"THIS OWNER' is not the only thing that determines personal boundary and etiquette.....

'THIS OWNER' does not have the right to dictate what is appropriate for any other owner.

I don't know why that leaves you going ?????

That's my opinion, anyhow.

 

[dogluva]

I've lived in NH most of my life. I have to say that I would never consider Barrington a "vacation destination". Is your house on Swain's Lake? Do people just want to use it as a base to visit New England in general? That said, I think Barrington is a lovely town (get some "snappy cheese" from Calef's) and I hope you enjoy your new home. Welcome to NH!

I am in Mass-it is cold here. I can't imagine wanting to go to NH right now unless you are near a ski slope.

 

[Drew Sailbum]

Check my location.


/thread.

I know what you mean. I have had visitors every year I've lived in Cayman except just after our big hurricane in 2004. Usually Christmastime is peak demand.

Oddly, none of these people wanted to visit me during the nine years I lived in Wisconsin. At least I had a good chance of a white Christmas there. Nothing but sand in the Caribbean.... not that I'm complaining.

 

[castmemberb4]

I admit I haven't read through all of the posts so someone may have said this.
Just say "Sorry I don't rent it out" They should get the hint.

And extra advice, Never buy a house on Orlando !!!
Been there done that !

 

[mefordis]

I am in Mass-it is cold here. I can't imagine wanting to go to NH right now unless you are near a ski slope.

Was thinking the same thing. Are you near a ski slope -- I mean like really close to one?

 

[goofyernmost]

I just don't see why it would be awkward for the homeowner. If I was the person with vacation home (or whatever) and someone asked me and I had a problem with it...I'd just politely say it wasn't possible and move on. If they got upset about it, that's their problem. But not everyone is wired like me, I suppose.

I guess I just see it as this. For all you know, that person loves to let others use their vacation home, and would be happy to let you use it. Or, they really want it for their own private use, or just don't feel comfortable having others use it while they're not there, or whatever. But you don't know if you don't ask. Now, if one is going to ask, they need to do it nicely, and they need to be willing to take "no" as an answer and not give the person a hard time about it. Giving someone grief over something like this is 100% totally rude beyond all messures of rudeness.

No, the proper way would be to suggest that you are looking for a place to stay in that area. Then, if they want, they can offer you their home. If they say nothing then the message is NO without having to feel that they offended someone. I've heard that message before..."it doesn't hurt to ask". Fact is...sometimes it does, you just don't realize it.

Social rule...never, ever put someone in awkward positions just to enhance your own life. Just not cool.