My DD school vent am I wrong?

[Jasminesmommy]

I got approval from someone at the office and her teacher.I don't see the point of coming in. She can give me the dumb school is important speech over the phone. I don't see the point of taking time off for this when they know she is a good student and know the reason of her absence.If I have to go I have to bring 4 kids all in the terrible 2 stages and I will let them rin wild and sit in my chair and laugh.I am very evil when you make me mad.

 

[phamton]

Originally posted by Jasminesmommy
I don't see the point of taking time off for this when they know she is a good student and know the reason of her absence.

Because it is the law in Indiana. If you don't approve of this law, you need to take it up with your state legislature. Seriously, I wouldn't ignore this meeting or you might find yourself in court. If you go into the meeting willing to work with them, they can probably just issue you a warning.

 

[disney4us2002]

You sent your 6 yr old to tell the principal that mommy isn't coming? Doesn't that seem a bit much for her to handle?

I'm in the minority here but I don't believe kids should be taken out of school for a vacation. Our state does have a mandatory attendance policy and I don't have a problem with it for the most part. We don't have year-round school here so the kids get off appx 10 wks during the summer, 10 days or so for Christmas, nearly a week for Thanksgiving, and a week and half for Easter. We schedule vacations around this time. I would love to go to WDW at less popular times but it isn't worth the possibility of my kids' school problems or failings.

Several years ago we went to WDW in September and pulled our oldest out of school for 3 days (schools were already closed 2 days). He was in 3rd grade then. Upon returning home, he picked up a nasty stomach bug and then missed 3 days of school right on top of his vacation absences. We then had a really rough winter and he had strep throat 4x and then over spring break he had his tonsils/adenoids removed. All total for the year he missed 17 days and we had to attend an attendance waiver mtg during the summer before he would be passed to the next grade. Yes, we got the waiver, but our son really struggled to keep up that year. Would he have missed nearly this many days w/o our trip? Possibly, but for this reason if we were to ever plan an intentional school absence, I would NEVER again do it at the beginning of the school year. I might consider late April or May if the kids hadn't been absent much.

Good luck and I hope the rest of the school year is uneventful.

 

[6_Time_Momma]

Wow! Glad I don't live in Indiana!!

We have always taken our kids out of school for vacations. They are allowed 10 days a semester here. Then, they have to make up.

 

[aprincessmom]

I'm in the minority here but I don't believe kids should be taken out of school for a vacation.

Well, I'm over here in the corner with you. Yet another example of what a rotten mother I am (no tv in the bedroom, no internet on the computer, no telephone in the room)

 

[snoopy]

Originally posted by aprincessmom
Well, I'm over here in the corner with you. Yet another example of what a rotten mother I am (no tv in the bedroom, no internet on the computer, no telephone in the room)

Another one in that corner. I have nothing against people who do take the kiddos out of school for vacations, as long as it isn't excessive, but we decided a couple of years ago that education comes first.

(and as far as internet/phone/TV in their rooms, I say when they go to work and earn the money to pay for internet/phone/TV in their rooms, they can have it. Until then, they are welcome to use all of this stuff under my watchful eye in the family room. )

 

[momof2inPA]

I have an idea. Maybe the social worker could come to your house during school hours.

And yeah, since when do schools have social workers? Castleton isn't a poverty stricken area, is it? Can anyone say "waste of money?"

 

[charabby]

Since when does a school have a SOCIAL WORKER?

Most schools do. In the case of the OP, it may just be a PITA, but for kids who are having problems, the social worker can be a major help. At our school just so far this year, the social worker has assisted 3 young children whose single mother was killed by a hit and run driver. I'm sure she did things for the kids privately, but she also planned a fund raiser for the family.

When families have fires, she orchestrates clothing drives and solicits furniture and cash donations for the families. She refers kids for counseling. She collects clothing and coats for families who need help. She also assists students who are in abusive situations. In any school setting, there are going to be kids with social and emotional problems that a social worker can address. Social services are not all financial in nature.

That being said, I think the OP should find out if the meeting is school policy/state law and if it is just simply go to the meeting. I would imagine it's just a formality for the social worker, too.

 

[RitaZ.]

I personally would not blow off the Social Worker. She could very well be following the policy mandated by legal authorities. If ignored, her next mandated step might be to turn you over to the local Family Court. I'm not kidding. Take care of it now.

Unfortunately, this is true.

Some of these rules are a little over the top, but we have to live with them. It may be an inconvenience for you and the absences may have been excused (except for 1 day) prior to your trip, but it's best if you settle this now. Just talk to them and tell them that you want to clear this misunderstanding/problem, ask for a telephone conference if you have to.

When it comes to your child's school, you want them to be your ally, not your enemy. There may be bigger issues that you could possibly encounter down the road and you may be viewed as an uncooperative parent, never a good thing. This is an issue that it's not worth being confrontational about, at least IMHO.

Good luck!

 

[momof2inPA]

Originally posted by charabby
Most schools do. In the case of the OP, it may just be a PITA, but for kids who are having problems, the social worker can be a major help. At our school just so far this year, the social worker has assisted 3 young children whose single mother was killed by a hit and run driver. I'm sure she did things for the kids privately, but she also planned a fund raiser for the family.

When families have fires, she orchestrates clothing drives and solicits furniture and cash donations for the families. She refers kids for counseling. She collects clothing and coats for families who need help. She also assists students who are in abusive situations. In any school setting, there are going to be kids with social and emotional problems that a social worker can address. Social services are not all financial in nature.

That being said, I think the OP should find out if the meeting is school policy/state law and if it is just simply go to the meeting. I would imagine it's just a formality for the social worker, too.

These are all nice things, but I am not sure that education funds, which reportedly are stretched so thin, should be used for these situations. Other agencies outside the school systems have provided these services in the past, why change that now?

When I was in school, there were six grades in the elementary school, one principal, one secretary, and a school nurse. There was a music teacher, an art teacher, and a part-time language therapist. I wonder how many administrators and auxilliary personnel are employed at my old school in the year 2004.

 

[northern michigan]

She works with students on character building, drug education, academic strategies to overcome challenges, more formal things like individual education plans for students with various needs, not to mention "dealing with" behavior issues that arise. Our school doesn't look the other way, they deal with it! It's not just suspension. She even meets with kids one on one or small group when they're dealing with issues that might disrupt their ability to learn like friends/enemies, family, death, divorce, etc.

 

[northern michigan]

You definitely want your school's administration to be an ally! Especially, with your kids just starting there academic road! There's nothing to be gained by being confrontational.

 

[mulanrouge]

Originally posted by amid chaos
My husband is in the hospitality business. It is impossible for him to travel during the summer months or vacations...after all, those are his busy times.
We have never given it a second thought and have taken the children out of school several times.
In addition, right now and for several more years, all three of my children have a DIFFERENT school vacation.

-family time together is at a minimum due to my husbands hours.
-family time together for a few days is more important than a few days of school.


Those are my 2 cents..don't let the school bully you into regreting your wonderful vacation.

I can totally relate to amid chaos. My husband and I are both self employed, both of our businesses are busy during holiday times. I am a wedding planner and it is next to impossible to go away at these times. The posters that have mentioned that they will not take their kids out of school during school times and only at designated school vacations, are able to do so. There are some people that can't do that. So my question to the schools and these other posters are, When are we supposed to go on a vacation? Never? That is not fair either! We went on our first vacation in five years (last year), and we swore that we would never wait that long again. Family time is important too!! We are looking at going again in March 2005.

 

[snarfer1]

Double Post. Sorry.

 

[Jasminesmommy]

quote:
"You sent your 6 yr old to tell the principal that mommy isn't coming? Doesn't that seem a bit much for her to handle?"

Disney4us2002 I never said I sent my 7 year old to tell them!!! I said they called 2x's she has no idea this is all going on.

They called me the Social worker and principal and we did the meting over the phone.I told them there was no reason to come since we have no problem and this wasn't a surprise to them and they said phone is fine. They just say she can't miss no more days without a doctors notice or family court may be needed which I am not sfraid of since they do nothing but like I said my daughter is not a miss school type of girl.

 

[RitaZ.]

Other agencies outside the school systems have provided these services in the past, why change that now?

Most of the agencies that provide "these services" outside of school, don't seek out those that need help. Even if a parent or their child is referred by the school for services, the parent may not pursue the matter on their own. If a child is enrolled in school and is having attendance or other types of problems, the school is aware of the problem early on and can intervene right away. I guess it all comes down to the schools having to "parent" because some parents don't.

BTW, this is obviously not the case with the OP. Just thought I would give my opinion on this question.

 

[MsMulan]

I agree with those you say take care of it. There is no point of making ememies with the school for following want seems to be policy. The social worker 9 times out of 10 is just doing her job and folloing the rules that were set in place. You indicated that you had received written notification from the school granting the vacation days...take all that information with you and just see what they have to say.

I have also toyed with the idea of taking my DD out of school to visit WDW during a less crowded season and just do not think that it is worth it now. She's in third grade and moving into 'real' homework and project land. I do not want to violate school policy but more important I do not want my child to have to play catch up. I understand that this was not the scenario for your child, but take into consideration the number of children they have to deal with on a daily basis, tracking attendance and so forth. There are bound to be some discrepencies that occur. Unfortunately for you and your family, you got caught in the middle.

Also, inquire about the social worker coming to your home since you have little ones at home. This may make you feel a little more at ease about the situation. Keep an open mind, it will work out!

 

[Octoberbride03]

Every time i read 1 of these school threads it reminds to seriously research homeschooling my kids once i get pregnant. Seems like every year there's more inane requirements than the last. I have an education degree but after using it for a bit I decided I didn't want to be doing it in a classroom.

Heck, when Dh and i went on our honeymoon last year to WDW and he saw all those kids(in Oct. mind you) I proceeded to run down all the projects the kids could do based on the vacation. I say there's nothing wrong with taking a vacation during the school year as long as your kid isn't already falling behind.

GL with social worker

 

[snarfer1]

Originally posted by Jasminesmommy
I got approval from someone at the office and her teacher.I don't see the point of coming in. She can give me the dumb school is important speech over the phone. I don't see the point of taking time off for this when they know she is a good student and know the reason of her absence.If I have to go I have to bring 4 kids all in the terrible 2 stages and I will let them rin wild and sit in my chair and laugh.I am very evil when you make me mad.

Go For It!

But first feed them all Fruit Loops (Artificial Dye & Sugar!) in JOLT cola-instead of milk (all the Sugar, Twice the Caffeine!!)


You can (if necessary) discretly pinch a child(ren) on the thigh(s) to get a good screaming outburst as well. ( )

I think the other posters are right, they (the Social Worker et. al.) have all the power. So go in. Smile , hum a happy tune to yourself as you sit there prentending to listen.

Don't waste your time pointing out you have a 'good' student, that you called before the vacation, etc. it will only antogonize them

Here is the really hard part. When it is all over, look them in the face (without laughing) and say, "I'm sorry, I understand, thank you for your time!"

Hopefully, during the meeting at least one special memento on the Social worker's or Principal's desk (teacher of the year award , priceless crystal vase, beloved pet , etc.) will be accidentally broken by one of your terrible twos! (Can you 'borrow' any more kids to take in with you? )

Optional: If any of the children (borrowed or your own) are not yet fully potty trained, a FULL Diaper or pull-up in this small, crowded and probably warm meeting room will really help expedite the conclusion of the conference! Been There Done That

Then go out to dinner!

Finally, whenever there is a school fundraiser, order a ton of stuff using the Social Worker's name!

-Tony

Good Luck, and remember you are fighting the good fight for all of us parents! :thewave:

 

[leighe]

I am honestly shocked by the attitudes some people have toward schools and teachers. Trust me, it is NOT FUN to have to deal with things like attendance issues, (and yes, I do think the OP's situation is over-the-top and a phone call should handle the problem.) make-up work, etc. Very few people (none that I know) go into education to satisfy some lust for power and control over children and their parents.

Schools have been put in the position of social workers, counselors, etc. by irresponsible parents (and no, I am not referring to anyone on this thread) and over-zealous law-makers. I can't tell you how many times I've had to deal with "little Johnny's" mom screaming at me that her child cannot have possibly done what he is in trouble for, that it wasn't his fault, blah, blah, blah. Then, half the time when I call "Johnny's" mom for a conference what I hear is "when he's at school, he's your problem. You're paid to deal with him there." That's one reason schools need people like social workers.
Everbody has rights but no one has any responsibilities.

I'm sorry if I sound hateful and have gotten off topic. It's just that I deal with stuff like this everyday and I do honestly care about every child that walks through my door. I don't understand why I'm percieved as the enemy by so many parents. No wonder their children come to school with rotten attitudes.