Mostly venting about older teen and Disney

[disneyjunkie]

I agree with the last few posters. The 19 year has a right to let his parents know what type of vacation he'd like to take. It's up to the parents to decide if they want to take a trip that will please their WHOLE family or one that will please the mother's sister.

I find it hard to believe that the parents will foot the bill for a vacation that mom, dad, and little sister will not enjoy just to make the 19 year old happy. Maybe they sat down as a family and picked a cruise line that will please all 4. What's wrong with that?

 

[FredS]

Originally posted by disneyjunkie
I agree with the last few posters. The 19 year has a right to let his parents know what type of vacation he'd like to take. It's up to the parents to decide if they want to take a trip that will please their WHOLE family or one that will please the mother's sister.

Never understand why some choose to deliberately twist to be mean. My sister has repeatedly indicated how much she wants to cruise Disney and was the one to initiate our families crusing together. I have seen how excited she was at planning this and it was abruptly put to a halt when her grown son refused to even consider Disney. I am disappointed at not spending time with them and frustrated that my sister was forced to give up her preference or her son would not go. Obviously I understand her dilemma that she would like to spend time with her son, but he understood how much she wanted Disney and I am also disappointed in him for forcing his mom to change her plans, particularly in light of his blatant "I want to party" comments. At no point did I ever indicate that her family's plan were supposed to please me.

 

[disneyjunkie]

Originally posted by FredS
Never understand why some choose to deliberately twist to be mean. My sister has repeatedly indicated how much she wants to cruise Disney and was the one to initiate our families crusing together. I have seen how excited she was at planning this and it was abruptly put to a halt when her grown son refused to even consider Disney. I am disappointed at not spending time with them and frustrated that my sister was forced to give up her preference or her son would not go. Obviously I understand her dilemma that she would like to spend time with her son, but he understood how much she wanted Disney and I am also disappointed in him for forcing his mom to change her plans, particularly in light of his blatant "I want to party" comments. At no point did I ever indicate that her family's plan were supposed to please me.

I did not post what I posted to be mean. I never called you any names.

No matter which line your sister picks, someone will be upset, you or her son. She can't win.

 

[FredS]

Originally posted by disneyjunkie


No matter which line your sister picks, someone will be upset, you or her son. She can't win.

I don't know how much simpler I can make this. It is not my sister choosing between me or her son being upset. My sad feelings are just a result of my sister not getting what she wants. She WANTS to cruise Disney, planned to cruise Disney, was excited that our families would be cruising together, then her son put a stop to that. She is upset and disappointed at being forced to choose between the cruise she very much wants and her son being, in my view, unreasonable and inconsiderate. I never expected her to do ANYTHING to keep ME from being upset. Again, I REPEAT: At no point did I ever indicate that her family's plan were supposed to please me. My sadness is because my sister's excitement was squelched because my nephew doesn't perceive DCL as enough of a party cruise line.

 

[Penny12]

Hey guys, just a gentle reminder. We are all entitled to comment or express our opinions here - however just make sure that whilst doing it, you atleast leave the name calling at the door...

 

[KathyTX]

FredS,

We can sure hear your frustration.

She WANTS to cruise Disney,

But not as much as she wants to keep peace in her family, right?

Try to look at it this way: her DS is growing up. At 19, he's still between being a child and an adult in many ways. And she's in between being the mother of a child and the mother of an adult... Of course you're right that he's immature right now. He truly is acting his age. Let's hope they all survive it.

He will be growing up and moving away from the family emotionally (and possibly geographically) very quickly now.

Although this vacation is not turning out the way you'd hoped, you and your DSis have next year and the year after and the year after to bond and play together.

Her DS will not be 19 forever. (Thank goodness!)

And she'll be grateful to you if you can provide her emotional support through the rocky patches of kid-raising.

(Note to self: you've survived the terrible twos, the bossy fives, you'll probably get through this moody 10th year. Need to find support for those crazy mid-teens ahead, and now you know to watch out for the late teens as well. Will that be the end of it? Hmmm...)

There will be smoother sailing ahead!

 

[KarenC]

Originally posted by KathyTX
(Note to self: you've survived the terrible twos, the bossy fives, you'll probably get through this moody 10th year. Need to find support for those crazy mid-teens ahead, and now you know to watch out for the late teens as well. Will that be the end of it? Hmmm...)

There will be smoother sailing ahead!

Reading some fairly recent research on brain development is helping me deal with my late teenager. (She just can't help herself sometimes!) The brain continues to develop well into the twenties. When kids are 18 and 19, the part of the brain that controls judgement is undergoing some significant changes. It's ironic to me that during this time, when their judgement is "clouded" due to developmental issues, we send them off to school where they have few limits and have to make major life decisions.

 

[ChattyKathy]

Kathy in TX...Doncha think the older they get, the worse they are, , LOL
J/K...

However, I personally think the Mom & Dad should pick the vacation or else have a family meeting, and obviously they may have already did this since they was wanting to do DCL....
Book it and go....THEN let him make his choice whether to go or not.. After all....isnt that what lifes all about...? Making choices and living with them....
He's 19, hes a big boy... I would just book it and go...and I'll bet you in the long run he would go along...Kids adjust!
Kids that age want to party it up and meet girls...but this is a time for family...Heck I'm surprised he's still around home at this age, My 23 y/o just got back from Seattle for 2-3 yrs...I seen him more when he was in Seattle and visited home then I do now since he is back home here... LOL.... hes in and out ALOT!
Oh well....we can all write in here for days upon days and Freds sister is going to do what the son wants her too =we all know that...he's pulling her heart strings...its her kid....we say this and that but the fact is, if the shoe was on our foot, we really dont know what we would do...
We bend easiest for our kids cuz we love them so much!




Boy, What we do for a Mothers Day card! LOL *wink,wink*



Good luck Fred....
Kathy