More birthday party etiquette

[K and K's Mommy]

I would not be offended at all to pay my own way. At that age I would have stayed with my son, but my DD is almost 7 and she would be fine with a drop off. Most parties around here start dropping off at 5.

 

[squirrel]

I think at 7 most parents should be okay with dropping their child off, if not then they should pay. I don't think the parents hosting the party should have to pay for all the extra guests (that don't need to attend).

I think it is nice that you are allowing siblings and parents to come and participate, even when they are not your child's friend.

The prices seem reasonable and if extra people want to come then they should pay. I think it is much harder for the parents with children who's birthdays are so close to the begining of the school year. You probably won't get all of the kids from the new class, but is always better to plan for the most amount.

 

[carj]

This is very well said. When we have a party at a place that is closed except for our group, I am fine with dropping off, and most other parents are too. If my kids are invited to a party that is public (like the local arcade that also doubles as a restaurant and sports bar, NO WAY am I dropping them off alone and hoping they will be OK.

I agree as well. My children are 7 and 5. I wouldn't leave either of them in a public place that wasn't closed for the party. I wouldn't leave them anywhere with someone that I didn't know. I have found that what some people consider appropriate supervion is not what I consider appropriate AT ALL!

 

[mjkacmom]

Even the OP said that she wouldn't be comfortable dropping her 7 year off at a party such as this. I started dropping mine at 5 (home parties), and have dropped my 7 year old off at many parties (home, swim, gymnastics, etc.), but I wouldn't feel comfortable at a public place, when I didn't know the parents at all.

 

[EthansMom]

Personally, I'd caution against inviting 30 kids. We just had DS's 7th birthday party last weekend with 12 invitees at the house and it was insane trying to corrale all of the kids (and this was at our house!). If you're counting on the other adults to keep track of the kids, then you should pay for one child and one parent.

If it were me, I'd invite DD's favorite friends from her old school and a few of her favorite friends from her new school.... just my opinion.

 

[vgrandy]

thanks to everyone for your thoughts. I am giving this alot of thought. I don't think 30 kids will attend but won't really know until rsvps. Our other ideas for the party are a local mini-golf course which is fenced in. There is a pavillion we can reserve. We would pay for each child to play a round of golf. Parents could stay and watch without paying extra $$$. This was the idea we were going with but it has a revolutionary war theme (this is New England) and we were sorta turned off by the guns/violence in a golf course. The newest idea is seeing if we could find a space in a church to show a movie. We did this when my son turned 7. We projected the movie up on the wall. It was a huge hit. I really think the Big Bug exhibit is a great idea and would be lots of fun but paying for parents triples the cost and I don't think I feel totally comfortable right now asking them to pay.

Victoria

 

[FSUDisneyGirl]

vgrady-

I see how it can all get confusing...trying to not offend parents or have anyone end up with hurt feelings. If you can't come up with a solution, I think your church idea is a great one! You could make it a Pajama Party theme (maybe slumber party is too girly?) and have popcorn and snacks...maybe tell scary stories, etc. Any way you do it, sounds like fun!

 

[shazen]

I don't think 30 kids will attend but won't really know until rsvps.

All I can add to this thread is my personal experience - if you invite 30 kids, be ready to organize/entertain/feed/pay for 30 kids!!! It might not happen, but then again it might...

My daughter's birthday is in the middle of summer vacation, so last year we invited 20 kids, assuming a few would be away on vacation or otherwise busy (it was on a Sunday morning). NOPE! 19 showed up.

This summer we wised up and only invited 8 to our house for a slip'n'slide party. How many kids showed up? 12! Half the kids brought their siblings (which was fine - we were prepared for them).

Personally, I think 30 invitees for a 7 y.o.'s part is WAAAAY too many. I understand wanting the invite all the kids - she wants her old friends to be there, wants to make new friends, etc., but if the party is too large it will be unmanageable and how much time will she have to get to know the new kids anyway??? Some ways you could pare it down would be to invite only the old friends, or maybe only the girls, or have her pick 7 friends...

Good luck, whatever you decide to do!

PS - The Big Bug exhibit was just here by us. It was cool to look at, but not really a birthday party kind of thing, IMHO. It's not very interactive, and you're not allowed to touch most (or all) of them. It's basically an outdoor sculpture exhibit. Your host location might be supplementing the exhibit with some activities, but I'd suggest you go see it before you finalize your plans. I think a large group of kids that age would look at the sculptures, say 'cool!', and then ask "what's next?"

 

[robsmom]

thanks to everyone for your thoughts. I am giving this alot of thought. I don't think 30 kids will attend but won't really know until rsvps.
Victoria

In my son's school the average for a party is about 1/3 of the kids. 1/3 don't call, a 1/3 rsvp that they can't come and 1/3 come. the 1/3 to come is always a subset of the same kids depending on who can make it that day.