Moral Question

[bugs13]

This has been the year of funerals. I have had 6 members of my family pass, two of them tragic and horrific. There is one more family member who is dying, just unfortunately a matter of time. We really need this vacation to WDW to get away and unstress. We are scheduled to leave 11/23 but I am nervous. Should I cancel and postpone? Due to my job I couldn't reschedule until the fall of 2006. Please help.

 

[Robo]

This has been the year of funerals. I have had 6 members of my family pass, two of them tragic and horrific. There is one more family member who is dying, just unfortunately a matter of time. We really need this vacation to WDW to get away and unstress. We are scheduled to leave 11/23 but I am nervous. Should I cancel and postpone? Due to my job I couldn't reschedule until the fall of 2006. Please help.

Who can predict these things?
11/23/05 is a long way off compared to today.
I say keep your current plans until you actually know more info.

 

[jrogers345]

This has been the year of funerals. I have had 6 members of my family pass, two of them tragic and horrific. There is one more family member who is dying, just unfortunately a matter of time. We really need this vacation to WDW to get away and unstress. We are scheduled to leave 11/23 but I am nervous. Should I cancel and postpone? Due to my job I couldn't reschedule until the fall of 2006. Please help.

This is really a decision you have to make. A lot I guess has to do with how close you are to this member? immediately family?

 

[HaleyB]

Life is for living. People who know and love you will understand.

And I am sorry for your losses.

 

[goofie4goofy]

I am in the same situation with my MIL...but we are not close at all.

We are leaving Sunday morning...I did take trip insurance though, just in case. You have to go! You need a break! You cannot predict these things. I see you are from NY...it's a short flight in case you need to go home. go for it.

 

[Aliki]

Everybody dies eventually. Live your life while you can. Don't plan around funerals.

My MIL's close friend has cancer, and everybody keeps talking about her dying before December. We're still going to Disney in October.

We have to live our lives, and not sit by their bedsides expecting them to die. I'm sure they would hope we did too.

 

[SammieG]

I agree with what others said but you must do what is best for you.

My mother nearly died whilst we were on vacation in WDW - in fact I had no idea how sick she was (I was incredibly close to my mother) as my brothers and father kept it from me. Had she died whilst I was there I would never ever have forgiven myself. My family decided for me that I would have been a liability at home under the circumstances - but I do resent that choice... I did get to see her before she died.. but I did miss two very important weeks with her.

Also. I have to say, my vacation was ruined for me and the whole family as it was so stressful (even though I didnt know the extent of her illness, I was speaking to my father and brother every day)

I would plan to go.. you so need the break, and then make the decision nearer the time.. xxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[LoveWDW]

I'd say don't cancel. Check if trip insurance would cover if a relative dies. That way you would be comfortable about the financial aspect. But I agree that you can't plan your vacation around the possibility of a death.

My husband and I were in this situation about 15 years ago. We had planned a trip to Hawaii ( the planning had been taking place for a year) for our 25th anniversary. A month or so before our departure, my Dad had a heart attack and congestive heart failure, then he ended up in the hospital again a couple days before we were to leave. We worried about if we should go. We ended up going with his blessings- he had been stationed there during WW II. We arrived and checked in and left for dinner. When we got back there was a blinking message light on the phone. We both stood and looked at it. I got teary. My husband commented "Well that didn't take long." But it turns out it was one of those how are you doing calls from the front desk. I ended up calling and asking how Dad was doing, if he seemed to be failing, we would have come on home. But nobody would say. I called several family members and finally decided just to enjoy Hawaii. I called every day, and he did come home from the hospital. Something we did that brought us great pleasure was to visit all the sites that Dad had talked about, and we took many pictures. When we got back and showed Dad the pictures he was extremely pleased, and enjoyed reminiscing. If we hadn't gone on our trip, Dad would have been unhappy about our not going on his behalf, and he wouldn't have had the fun of the pictures and reminiscing. He died about 8 years later. After all these years, I am still convinced that we did the right thing by going on our trip. Dad was ill and in and out of the hospital all of those years. Vacations can be cut short if necessary.

 

[Puffy2]

What relation are we talking about here? I would only consider rebooking if it was my child, grandchild, or parent.

 

[babar41]

Hi Bugs13. FIrst of all let me say how sorry I am for your losses. It has been a very rough year for you, death is never easy to accept and to have to accept one right after another in the same year is very difficult. My heart goes out to you and yours.

As far as your Disney trip is concerned, only you can answer your question. If it is important to you or your family member that is dying for you to be present when she dies then obviously you can't plan a trip without the trip insurance and the ability to cancel. If it is not important for you to be present then go, you will always be with her in heart.

Disney is a wonderful place, but realize you will still feel sad over the loss of your family members even in this magical place.

Between 2000 and 2004 I have lost my best friend of 40 years, two brothers, one sister and my mother. I have sat in the middle of WDW and bawled like a baby. But given the choice by my DH if we should cancel our trips I always said no. I needed my Happy Place. I needed to remember there was happiness in the world. I don't regret having gone.

No matter what you decide, may God be with you and help you through this very difficult time.

 

[TDC Nala]

If the death is not imminent, I don't see going as a problem.

 

[safaulk]

I would just go and hope for the best. If you really need the vacation, I would take it.

PS. I truly am sorry for all of the tragedy that has plagued your family. I hope things improve for you and yours.

 

[disneyfav4ever]

I'd say go, my DBF's father just died and I can't wait to get to WDW with him.

 

[jann1033]

sorry you have had such a bad yrs.

the trip insurance is a good idea. my fil died totally unexpectedly while we were on vacation and natch we came home but lost the vacation ( not that big of deal comparing the two situations but if we could have known it was going to happen or might we would have done something different)

agree with the others it depends on if you will spend the time worrying, feel guilty if they a die and you aren't home ect. if it's a distant relative i say go. if not i know i appreciated the time i spent with my father when he was dying( last few days of his life) and could make him comfortable and not alone. so each situation is diferent

but what ever you decide don't make yourself feel bad about it, you can't control these things

 

[SlightlyGoofy]

I have been sick lately and had surgery to boot and my instructions to my friends and family was this, if you have been here for me while I was alive that is all I can ask and if I die, go on, enjoy yourself, I need nothing else.

I can think of no more fitting memorial to me than my loved ones be at DW among my favorite people and places.

Slightly Goofy

 

[Terri C]

Life is for living. People who know and love you will understand.

And I am sorry for your losses.

I agree 100%...having said that I am so sorry you have to go thru this.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.

 

[jimmiej]

Every trip I've planned since about 2000, I've worried my grandparents would pass away while we were in Florida. My grandmother died in Dec. 2002. My grandfather is still living but he's 92 & in poor health. I finally came to understand, if it happens, it happens. Family is more important & WDW will still be there.

I say go enjoy yourself. WDW is a great place to set the world aside for a while. If something happens prior, you can deal with it then.

Life happens. Go enjoy yourself.

 

[bugs13]

Thank you everyone for your kind words and thoughts. The person that is sick is my cousin, we are very close. I would not talk to her about this but you are right she would want us to go on living. I would feel extremely guilty if something happened when I was gone but I do have insurance on the trip and could fly home immediately. I think she would be upset to know that I would even considered canceling.

Thank you again for all the helpful advice. I will keep my original plans and not focus on the negative. This is what she would want.

 

[pampam]

This post brought back some painful memories. See my post "How Disney Handled a Very Difficult Situation " on the Resort Board. We are going back to WDW in 2 weeks, to use up our refunded passes, and I know I will be feeling very meloncholy, especially at Epcot. Go, enjoy as best you can, knowing that if you are staying on site, you will be well care for by Disney.

 

[Martha7]

I would go as well. Just an aside, how does trip insurance work? Do you notify them and then book your own ticket home and get reimbursed? Just curious, as I've never bought trip insurance, but with our parents getting older, it might not be a bad idea. Anything can happen...