Minimalism

[ronandannette]

I can totally understand that, and I agree. If its a community thing where you have many people or families willing to give time, passwords, rides for each other then that is great.

Don't get me wrong - I don't live in a commune or anything . I'm talking about a normal life where we have our family members and a close circle of friends that can absolutely be counted on to help one another. We babysit, paint each other's houses, run errands and lend things back and forth - you get the idea. We have absolutely no hesitation to ask for help when we need it and we basically wouldn't think of saying "no" if we have the means to say "yes" - whatever the request.

The couple I'm talking about are the adult, married daughter and SIL of one of our very close friends. They grew up seeing this modelled but ironically, only really got 1/2 the lesson...

 

[The Mystery Machine]

. My son was saying the other day that it is funny--getting rid of stuff feels better than buying it did lol

Now THAT is priceless.

I have a LONG way to go. We are in a large house at the moment and that means we really have to think about the size of our furniture. We have several large pieces as well as a king size bed suite. We are getting rid of a lot but not quite there yet.

 

[indimom]

The concept is good, but I just don't think I could really get there. I live in an 1800 sq ft house with four people and two dogs. I could probably cut back to 1000-1200 when the kids are gone, but that's about my limit. And I'd still want my two-car garage for storage purposes. Yes, there are items we don't use often, but I couldn't imagine having to rent or borrow each and every one when I do need it. We have four seasons here, that means clothes for four seasons. We have a yard, that means tools to care for it. I ENJOY decorating for holidays. The list goes on...

 

[LisaR]

I'm not a minimalist in the true definition, but many people do like to call me that.

We moved less than a year ago. The movers had the truck emptied out at 2pm and by 7pm I had every single box unpacked and almost everything put away (I left out pictures to hang on the wall until I could get a feel for where I wanted to put them). DH even had all of his garage boxes unpacked.

My house is nicely decorated and we have all the essentials and luxuries we need and want, but I just don't require a whole lot and I don't like a lot of extras.

My family has long joked that they can't ever sit around for too long because I'll sell them, give them away, or throw them out.

 

[PollyannaMom]

IDK - maybe. Or maybe yours are just mooches. The people I'm talking about though have made a conscious decision. They have no children and have a "life plan" that includes working as little as possible so as to free up time and energy for other pursuits (in their case, outdoor activities - the "big things" they own are a 2-person kayak and bikes). Here's some examples of what I mean:

• They live in a rented apartment with very little furniture. They do not have a TV. They watch what they can on their laptop, and use somebody else's Netflix password. If there's something on the broadcast channels they want to see, they go over to somebody's house or to a bar for sporting events.
• They do not have a vehicle so wherever the bikes or transit won't take them, they ask somebody for a ride.
• They don't have camping equipment so whenever they trek overnight, they borrow equipment.
• They have only the clothes they need for work and recreation. Anything else they borrow, like nicer outfits for special events and heavy winter coats and boots when they come to visit here in the cold months.

There's tons more but you get the gist.

I see it just slightly differently. I am ALL FOR living in community with one another, sharing and inter-dependence. But normally, this is done with the intention that everybody contributes and that they are just as willing to give as receive. In the case of these acquaintances they have very little to give except time, and that they spend most of out in the bush somewhere looking for a new species of pine cone (or something...) According to people closer to them, they can rarely be counted on to pitch in when help is needed because they are always otherwise occupied. (FTR, they apparently never ask to borrow money - they don't need much money for this "lifestyle".)

Yeah, I definitely think this leans toward "mooching".

If one neighbor owns a tent, and the other a trailer, and they borrow from each other, that's great! But if one owns all the stuff and the other does all the borrowing, that's not.

If someone doesn't own a car, and sometimes takes a taxi, that's a lifestyle choice. If the same person always expects rides from friends and family, that's using people.

 

[Disney Doll]

IDK - maybe. Or maybe yours are just mooches. The people I'm talking about though have made a conscious decision. They have no children and have a "life plan" that includes working as little as possible so as to free up time and energy for other pursuits (in their case, outdoor activities - the "big things" they own are a 2-person kayak and bikes). Here's some examples of what I mean:

• They live in a rented apartment with very little furniture. They do not have a TV. They watch what they can on their laptop, and use somebody else's Netflix password. If there's something on the broadcast channels they want to see, they go over to somebody's house or to a bar for sporting events.
• They do not have a vehicle so wherever the bikes or transit won't take them, they ask somebody for a ride.
• They don't have camping equipment so whenever they trek overnight, they borrow equipment.
• They have only the clothes they need for work and recreation. Anything else they borrow, like nicer outfits for special events and heavy winter coats and boots when they come to visit here in the cold months.

There's tons more but you get the gist.

I hate to say it but they're not minimalist, they're mooches.

They let other people pay for things that they then use. Netflix, camping equipment, dress clothes.

 

[NHdisneylover]

The eternal borrows may like to describe themselves as minimalist--but if they are needing to use items or get rides often, then they are just being cheap and moochers IMO (unless they are reciprocating in some other way).

For me (not that I think I am a minimlist, there are things I DO care very much about--just that we consciously try not to have more than we really, truly want and need), one thing we are doing with the new condo is not having a yard to care for anymore--but we love being outside and have a huge terrace. There is a shared yard for the condo which will be cared for by a hired gardening service--so we truly will not have a need to own gardening equipment.

We've had just one car for the past 7 1/2 years--and my husband uses it for work most days. DS17 and I bike or walk or take public transit most of the time and if we need more, we rent a car or take a taxi. We budget for that--and it is still far less costly and far better for the environment than having a second car and needing space to park it, etc. I do gratefully accept rides home from my fellow Girl Scout leader after meetings (we live on her way home) but I would never insist and often buy her dinner if we stop for fast food on the way--to help pay her back for her help. Etc.

 

[lovedisney123]

I like the idea of sharing things. Like our neighbor borrows out tall ladder when he needs it. I would rather he do that then go out and buy one that he only needs every few years (we don't need it often either, we bought it to fix some siding once over a decade ago). So many of our tools and things like that just sit in storage. I think moving into a condo sounds WONDERFUL! I know right now it could not happen. We have way too much stuff.

When we moved to this house with our preschool children we did not have a lot. Now, we have so much that it stresses me out. When my parents passed away, getting rid of their stuff was a huge job. I don't want to leave that for my kids. So I am hoping we can get things down to a manageable amount eventually. Maybe even move to a condo one day. But stopping the compulsive shopping is the first step for me. I am really trying to give me thought to spending.

I see this as a process. Probably a long process. But every journey starts with the first step.

 

[NHdisneylover]

In my experience (we have moved a lot)--you fill whatever space you have. You don't use all the stuff--but you WILL fill the space lol

 

[lovedisney123]

We've had just one car for the past 7 1/2 years--and my husband uses it for work most days. DS17 and I bike or walk or take public transit most of the time and if we need more, we rent a car or take a taxi. We budget for that--and it is still far less costly and far better for the environment than having a second car and needing space to park it, etc. I do gratefully accept rides home from my fellow Girl Scout leader after meetings (we live on her way home) but I would never insist and often buy her dinner if we stop for fast food on the way--to help pay her back for her help. Etc.

I have been discussing the one car idea. I think we can make it work. Right now, we have 4 drivers and 3 cars. But our 'kids' just graduated college and will moving away and each taking one of the cars, so DH and I will either have to buy another car or learn to get by with one car. I am leaning towards the one car with the idea that we can rent a car if we need it. But we have not made a decision on that.

I also wanted to give a High FIVE for you being a Girl Scout leader! I did it for 6 years and have wonderful memories of that time. ENJOY! One day you won't have a living room full of cookies once a year or badges to sew on to a vest....you will miss it. But good for you getting a handle on this consumerism now. I must say, I was not a minimalist as a Girl Scout leader and bought a lot of silly things for my troop (think Troop Beverly Hills, it was one of our favorite movies and we watched it at sleepovers and made fondue). Oh well..... at least I am getting a grip on things now.

 

[gotomu212]

Extreme minimalism gets all the attention (because it's extreme and fun to think about how far you can push something) but you can be a Minnimalist in any size house. For us it's being very mindful of what we do purchase and try to live "lightly". We have an elementary aged son and he is in no way deprived but it's amazed me to find he was happier with less stuff- the things he has, he loves and really cares about. Before we moved to a lighter lifestyle he would tell you that such and such toy was boring and he didn't want to play with it right now-yet there it was taking up space (physical and mental) and it would hang around waiting to be played with. Now everything is just easier (to clean, to care for, to play with, etc).

Btw if you really want to cause an uproar in any minimalism conversation ask people about books. It's fascinating- people who own one spoon and one bowl will say you can have me 800 hardbacks over my dead body. And the whole ebook vs dead tree books conversation can break up friendships!

 

[lovedisney123]

Btw if you really want to cause an uproar in any minimalism conversation ask people about books. It's fascinating- people who own one spoon and one bowl will say you can have me 800 hardbacks over my dead body. And the whole ebook vs dead tree books conversation can break up friendships!

That is funny. I actually didn't realize that issue about books until I started reading the book 7 for a book club I am joining in a couple of weeks. She also mentions her love of books and not wanting to give them up. I am reading her book as an ebook (which is a new experience for me, I decided to start trying that out if I can't borrow from the library). I have a box of books ready to go to Goodwill next week. I have decided we no longer need to keep all of our books when someone else can read them (and we already have read them all).

I know I would never become an 'extreme' minimalist. But I am enjoying the process of reducing so far, and I have caught myself so many times wanting to buy something and stopping myself after giving it more thought. I am only about a month into this new journey, so we will see where it leads.

 

[ronandannette]

...But I am enjoying the process of reducing so far, and I have caught myself so many times wanting to buy something and stopping myself after giving it more thought. I am only about a month into this new journey, so we will see where it leads.

Just curious - what kind of things would this include for you? I've never been a "stuff" person and I hate shopping so I'm almost never tempted to buy things without having planned it out first.

 

[NHdisneylover]

For us it's being very mindful of what we do purchase and try to live "lightly". We have an elementary aged son and he is in no way deprived but it's amazed me to find he was happier with less stuff- the things he has, he loves and really cares about. Before we moved to a lighter lifestyle he would tell you that such and such toy was boring and he didn't want to play with it right now-yet there it was taking up space (physical and mental) and it would hang around waiting to be played with. Now everything is just easier (to clean, to care for, to play with, etc).

Yes--exactly--for us it is not about having nothing or trying to have as little as possible; it is about consciously only having what we really, truly want and will bring us joy on a lasting basis.
So, as cool as subscription boxes sound, as as much fun as it would be to get them on the day they arrive--I would never do that these days: a boxful of things not chosen by me or someone who knows and loves me is highly unlikely to all be stuff I will really enjoy long term. Likewise--we almost never pick up swag on offer at conventions, etc.
We've always been big on one nicer gift for holidays instead of lots of little things to open, etc.
Then add in really thinking about if you will use an item a lot before you buy it (or, waiting a week to see if the desire passes), well, you end up with not so much stuff--and YES, we enjoy what we have more, and it is easier to clean and keep everything in order, etc.

And i am laughing at the books. I have about 30 leather bound books my mom gave me over the years when I was younger. They mean the world to me and are among the few things that we brought overseas when we moved here (we also shipped my husband's stereo and eventually had the antique regulator clock my father in law rebuilt and gave us as a wedding gift shipped over as well--those are all things which are not needs and have minimal use (the stereo has more use--but we could play music on a much smaller device I guess) but they all do bring us great joy and long lasting joy--so they make the cut

(oh and to the poster who mentioned Girl Scouts--oh yes I do love it. My daughter is in college now and i am still leading and the Overseas Committee Chair for our town--this is my 15th year leading---I think scouts has got a permanent grip on me lol)

 

[morgan98]

Yeah, I definitely think this leans toward "mooching".

If one neighbor owns a tent, and the other a trailer, and they borrow from each other, that's great! But if one owns all the stuff and the other does all the borrowing, that's not.

If someone doesn't own a car, and sometimes takes a taxi, that's a lifestyle choice. If the same person always expects rides from friends and family, that's using people.

This exactly. Not purchasing your own items to use, but expecting others to buy these items and then asking to borrow them, is not necessarily being a minimalist, but almost more an opportunist. I cannot imagine not having a car at all, but calling others to ask for rides.

People like this would annoy me to no end, especially if then then like to preach about the "minimalist" life style while using my things.

Please don't take this as necessarily being against a minimalist life style. We could stand to cut back on some things, probably. However, like others have said, we have focused our energy on certain types of things we want to have less of, at least as a start.

 

[lovedisney123]

Just curious - what kind of things would this include for you? I've never been a "stuff" person and I hate shopping so I'm almost never tempted to buy things without having planned it out first.

Oh you are lucky. I didn't use to be a 'stuff' person, and then I had twin girls and well.....I started buying (double) for them a lot. But I also seem to have impulsive purchases at the grocery store that I need to give more consideration. Honestly, it will be easier once my twins move out and it is just DH and I because we don't tend to buy so much for ourselves. I like buying for my girls though. And they do not need more stuff. I can only HOPE to one day not be tempted to buy things without planning. That is the goal.

 

[ronandannette]

Oh you are lucky. I didn't use to be a 'stuff' person, and then I had twin girls and well.....I started buying (double) for them a lot. But I also seem to have impulsive purchases at the grocery store that I need to give more consideration. Honestly, it will be easier once my twins move out and it is just DH and I because we don't tend to buy so much for ourselves. I like buying for my girls though. And they do not need more stuff. I can only HOPE to one day not be tempted to buy things without planning. That is the goal.

Not ever going into stores helps. I guess one of the reasons I don't have more "things" is that I never even see the vast array of merchandise that's on offer - I have literally gone 3 or 4 months at a time without going into any store except a supermarket. For me, a purchase is usually motivated by coming to a point where I "need" something and from there I can think about what exactly to buy and where to get it. Sometimes if I wait long enough the "need" passes.

 

[lovedisney123]

Our grocery store is also a department store and the sundries are on one side and groceries on the other. So you have to walk by 'stuff' to get to both. It would be much easier to ignore if the grocery store was ONLY a grocery store.

 

[barkley]

Yes, there are items we don't use often, but I couldn't imagine having to rent or borrow each and every one when I do need it

that's me as well. I don't like to have tons of stuff we don't often use BUT won't pay to rent something that I know (after crunching the numbers) that w/the frequency we would use it costs less after 2-3 uses to buy vs. rent (and I'm not a big borrower-esp. when it comes to powered equipment/items-b/c I KNOW how much it costs us to maintain/operate these and what the general life span is, our borrowing it/someone repeatedly borrowing it from us and just replacing the fuel/bottle of carpet shampoo is just a fraction of the upkeep/decreases the lifespan-once in a great while-fine, as a habit vs. buying/renting our/your own-nope).

 

[MickeySP]

IDK - maybe. Or maybe yours are just mooches. The people I'm talking about though have made a conscious decision. They have no children and have a "life plan" that includes working as little as possible so as to free up time and energy for other pursuits (in their case, outdoor activities - the "big things" they own are a 2-person kayak and bikes). Here's some examples of what I mean:

• They live in a rented apartment with very little furniture. They do not have a TV. They watch what they can on their laptop, and use somebody else's Netflix password. If there's something on the broadcast channels they want to see, they go over to somebody's house or to a bar for sporting events.
• They do not have a vehicle so wherever the bikes or transit won't take them, they ask somebody for a ride.
• They don't have camping equipment so whenever they trek overnight, they borrow equipment.
• They have only the clothes they need for work and recreation. Anything else they borrow, like nicer outfits for special events and heavy winter coats and boots when they come to visit here in the cold months.

There's tons more but you get the gist.

They are not minimalist - they are cheap moochers. Why would anyone support them?

I love my luxuries, never giving them up. I love my stuff & all my creature comforts. People can sleep on cots & live 500sq ft - nope.

He who dies with the most toys wins!!