Marrieds choosing not to have kids

[Hixski]

No, not bitter here either. Just fed up like the rest at parents not parenting.

I am just going to leave a picture and story to go with it. We did the DCL cruise in September 2005 for our 20th anniversary. Our hostess asked at the beginning of the week if we were there for anything special. We told it was for our 20th anniversary but we were a couple of weeks early. She was from Russia and very sweet. We chatted with her all week. By the end of the week she told us we had been her favorites that week. She confided that she was almost done with her time on the ship and she really needed a break. She said it was so nice to do our room as it wasn't a wreck. She said every other cabin she had that week had children and the rooms were a terrible mess. She asked why don't American people make their children mind??? We told her she was asking the wrong people as we wondered the same thing.

Now for the picture. She left this for us to come back to after dinner on the last sea day. For our anniversary and because we were her favorites that week. And not messy. She got a huge tip for that. She even had rose petals trailing from the door all the way in.

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[MomNeedsVacay]

We have asked this of many of our trolls in the past- they are the ones with no lives that need to invade our happy thread! They come and go- as you can see by her # of posts, she is new at this.

She will go away.

As we said in the past- we CF people do not go over the the family boards and stir the pot.

you have over 6,000 posts and you are saying that I, me, moi, have no LIFE.....

 

[MomNeedsVacay]

MomNeedsVacay - it may very well appear that way from the most recent few pages of this thread, but I encourage you -- if you truly are here to gain some knowledge and not just troll -- to go back and read the first few pages. It's an eye-opener, and I think you'll gain a whole new understanding and empathy for this often maligned and misunderstood group.

I will do. Thanks.

 

[PrincessKitty1]

I could CLEARLY see the "oblivious parents" thing going on.

I was at the movie theatre recently and there was an older kid behind me talking constantly. I thought, surely he'll stop when the movie comes on.

Nope, he started narrating the movie incessantly. About 5-10 minutes into the movie (when I realized he didn't have the manners to stop talking without prompting), I turned around and said, "Would you please stop talking?"

At that point, I realized he was talking to his MOTHER. Now, why would a mom not teach her child that you don't talk during a movie?? The kid was about 15 or 16...way past the age to be learning simple manners.

I thought perhaps he had an attention disorder or something and maybe couldn't help himself (I wokred with special needs children for many years and I'm pretty patient and understanding with kids), but I was mistaken...I didn't hear another peep from him during the movie.

 

[PrincessKitty1]

Regardless, my issue is almost never with the kid, it is with the self-entitled parent who uses the child as an excuse to behave badly and abuse others, which include child-free couples, singles, other families, elders, etc.

When DH and I saw Davy Jones last Friday night, we got there fairly late and sat in the very last row. After we'd been sitting there about 10 minutes, some kids came up and sat next to us. Their mom said very loudly, "Oh, I bet you can't see because of the tree in the way!" Then she turned to her husband and said, "The kids can't see because these people took our seats! These people took our seats!"

She went on and on so that the kids were even embarrassed--"It's OK mom, it's no big deal!"

I completely ignored her. Of course, we weren't in her seats (there were no reserved seats for the concert and there was nobody in the row saving seats when we sat down ) but she apparently was trying to guilt us into moving over so her kids could have a better view. (I'm guessing the seats were "theirs" for a previous show). Yeah, like I should sit in front of a tree because you didn't get there early enough to get a better seat?? Get over yourself!

 

[PrincessKitty1]

However, does anyone here really feel that WDW sort of discriminates against you because you are childfree? I feel sometimes like the fat white couple (us) gets strange looks.

I read a couple of years ago that 50% of visitors to Disney are adults visiting without kids (not that they are necessarily childfree, just that they do not have kids with them).

I think WDW has become remarkably more adult-oriented in the last 15 years. DH and I went to Epcot about 15 years ago and I remember being stopped by a cast member as we tried to leave the Mexico counter-service area with beers--he politely told us that we could not walk around Epcot with beers in our hand. Now you can go anywhere with drinks. There's a lot more adult-oriented entertainment, too.

I suspect a lot of people with kids at WDW are not having a very good time and are looking at you because they can't imagine why an adult would be there if they didn't have to be. I know my brother has brought his children to WDW only because he feels obligated, and he and his wife really do not enjoy their time in the Magic Kingdom!

 

[LuluLovesDisney]

No, not bitter here either. Just fed up like the rest at parents not parenting.

I am just going to leave a picture and story to go with it. We did the DCL cruise in September 2005 for our 20th anniversary. Our hostess asked at the beginning of the week if we were there for anything special. We told it was for our 20th anniversary but we were a couple of weeks early. She was from Russia and very sweet. We chatted with her all week. By the end of the week she told us we had been her favorites that week. She confided that she was almost done with her time on the ship and she really needed a break. She said it was so nice to do our room as it wasn't a wreck. She said every other cabin she had that week had children and the rooms were a terrible mess. She asked why don't American people make their children mind??? We told her she was asking the wrong people as we wondered the same thing.

Now for the picture. She left this for us to come back to after dinner on the last sea day. For our anniversary and because we were her favorites that week. And not messy. She got a huge tip for that. She even had rose petals trailing from the door all the way in.

[/

How beautiful! What a lovely thing to do and she sounds like a sweet woman.

I really hope you enjoyed that! Isn't DCL fabulous? I love the Vista Spa and Serenity Bay - those two places alone are worth the trip!

Her simple question certainly says a lot! I really don't understand why American parents in the past few years seem to have just given up. I have a couple theories but it's so widespread that it's tough to say. I do hope there's a turn around soon. Or else, the fall of America may just follow.

 

[Muushka]

No, not bitter here either. Just fed up like the rest at parents not parenting.

I am just going to leave a picture and story to go with it. We did the DCL cruise in September 2005 for our 20th anniversary. Our hostess asked at the beginning of the week if we were there for anything special. We told it was for our 20th anniversary but we were a couple of weeks early. She was from Russia and very sweet. We chatted with her all week. By the end of the week she told us we had been her favorites that week. She confided that she was almost done with her time on the ship and she really needed a break. She said it was so nice to do our room as it wasn't a wreck. She said every other cabin she had that week had children and the rooms were a terrible mess. She asked why don't American people make their children mind??? We told her she was asking the wrong people as we wondered the same thing.

Now for the picture. She left this for us to come back to after dinner on the last sea day. For our anniversary and because we were her favorites that week. And not messy. She got a huge tip for that. She even had rose petals trailing from the door all the way in.

[/

Gosh, we PAID for our romantic turn down and it was not nearly as beautiful as this is. Just lovely!

 

[LuluLovesDisney]

When DH and I saw Davy Jones last Friday night, we got there fairly late and sat in the very last row. After we'd been sitting there about 10 minutes, some kids came up and sat next to us. Their mom said very loudly, "Oh, I bet you can't see because of the tree in the way!" Then she turned to her husband and said, "The kids can't see because these people took our seats! These people took our seats!"

She went on and on so that the kids were even embarrassed--"It's OK mom, it's no big deal!"

I completely ignored her. Of course, we weren't in her seats (there were no reserved seats for the concert and there was nobody in the row saving seats when we sat down ) but she apparently was trying to guilt us into moving over so her kids could have a better view. (I'm guessing the seats were "theirs" for a previous show). Yeah, like I should sit in front of a tree because you didn't get there early enough to get a better seat?? Get over yourself!

It is nice when the kids manage to grow up well in spite of a bad example. I think it's all those wonderful teachers out there.

On a side note, I am so jealous! I *love* Davy Jones! I really wanted to go when I heard he's be there, but I just couldn't swing it with work being so busy - otherwise I would have definitely gone!

 

[LuluLovesDisney]

I read a couple of years ago that 50% of visitors to Disney are adults visiting without kids (not that they are necessarily childfree, just that they do not have kids with them).

I think WDW has become remarkably more adult-oriented in the last 15 years. DH and I went to Epcot about 15 years ago and I remember being stopped by a cast member as we tried to leave the Mexico counter-service area with beers--he politely told us that we could not walk around Epcot with beers in our hand. Now you can go anywhere with drinks. There's a lot more adult-oriented entertainment, too.

I suspect a lot of people with kids at WDW are not having a very good time and are looking at you because they can't imagine why an adult would be there if they didn't have to be. I know my brother has brought his children to WDW only because he feels obligated, and he and his wife really do not enjoy their time in the Magic Kingdom!

Last summer, BF and I met up with my brother and SIL and 2 nephews in Epcot. My SIL just kept saying how much she wanted to come back without the kids! LOL. All of us, including the kids, did have a fabulous vacation!

 

[PrincessKitty1]

It is nice when the kids manage to grow up well in spite of a bad example. I think it's all those wonderful teachers out there.

On a side note, I am so jealous! I *love* Davy Jones! I really wanted to go when I heard he's be there, but I just couldn't swing it with work being so busy - otherwise I would have definitely gone!

My husband really, really wanted to see Davy Jones last year, but we didn't get to go, and he was THRILLED to see him this year. The Monkees were really big when DH and I were in elementary school, and DH knows ALL the songs--I just knew the hits. Davy put on really fun shows--he is a great entertainer, and varied his sets/patter enough to make each set seem new. He seemed to really enjoy being up on stage, and we felt priveleged to join in the fun!

 

[maddhatir]

No, not bitter here either. Just fed up like the rest at parents not parenting.

I am just going to leave a picture and story to go with it. We did the DCL cruise in September 2005 for our 20th anniversary. Our hostess asked at the beginning of the week if we were there for anything special. We told it was for our 20th anniversary but we were a couple of weeks early. She was from Russia and very sweet. We chatted with her all week. By the end of the week she told us we had been her favorites that week. She confided that she was almost done with her time on the ship and she really needed a break. She said it was so nice to do our room as it wasn't a wreck. She said every other cabin she had that week had children and the rooms were a terrible mess. She asked why don't American people make their children mind??? We told her she was asking the wrong people as we wondered the same thing.

Now for the picture. She left this for us to come back to after dinner on the last sea day. For our anniversary and because we were her favorites that week. And not messy. She got a huge tip for that. She even had rose petals trailing from the door all the way in.

[/

The room looks beautiful-- What a nice anniversary surprise!

I wonder what she did for the people with the kids

 

[maddhatir]

It is nice when the kids manage to grow up well in spite of a bad example. I think it's all those wonderful teachers out there.

 

[Liisa]

I think it is very telling that certain individuals with children have the curiousity to read this thread and, I'm fairly certain, that we aren't over reading the "families with kids" threads (and if we are reading, we are not contributing)... I think they are jealous of our lifestyle!!! Troll all you want, you won't change our minds and you certainly won't make us appreciate all of the ill behaved children that are being raised these day.

Now, if you'll excuse me, DH and I are heading out to enjoy a late brunch and a movie... we overslept this morning - we were up late last night planning our vacation trips this year over several glasses of a nice red wine.

 

[Liisa]

One other thought... I had meant to post this a few weeks back... my husband was telling me about an article he read at work (to my memory it was posted in either the Wall Street Journal or the New York Times - I've searched on the internet but haven't been able to locate the article for all of you)... the article was about "The most privileged generation". The basic premise of the article was that the latest college graduates have been raised to believe that they are all winners without having to try and that they are "entitled" without having to work. The author's concern was that all of these kids are now entering the work force to become the problem of the employer. These young adults in their early twenties have never had to work for success (think of the sports teams where every team gets a trophy because we wouldn't want any child to feel inferior), and they are now entering the workplace on the bottom rung (as most of us did). The difference - they don't want to work their way up, why should they have to?

It was a very telling article and gave voice to much of what we have discussed on this thread. Parenting styles have far reaching consequences. This isn't just our opinion, this is a real concern for the general population. And if anyone else can find the article, please feel free to post a link! DH read it to me over the phone and I believe I hit some of the major points, but it went far more in depth and I think there are several of you who might find it interesting.

 

[maddhatir]

Since I don't have a life ..........
I thought I would Google the phrase- The most privileged generation- funny that I found numerous articles on the subject-

Thought this was interesting......You can just go out and buy the book!

"The Price of Privilege: How Parental Pressure and Material Advantage Are Creating a Generation of Disconnected and Unhappy Kids" (Harper Collins, $24.95), details an unexpected teenage wasteland of bulging closets and empty lives, where parenting is a competitive sport and appearances aren't just deceiving.

Oh and Liisa, I also slept late- 10:15- and I will be off soon to the nursery-- OMG- NO!- the "landscaping nursery" to go and buy some shady plants for DH's pride and joy- his 30x 40 garage w/ lift Right now, just relaxing on the internet with a cup of coffee enjoying the the peace and quiet- birds chirping and my music in the background.

What's that that I DON'T hear???--- kids crying, screaming and bugging me

 

[Muushka]

Ah yes. Sunday morning, or I should say, Sunday afternoon.
I am still in my PJs, got up after 10. My cat was a little put out, but eventually we let her in the bedroom.

Yes, life is good.

 

[PrincessKitty1]

I slept in while DH walked the dog...then we headed over to a flea market in a nearby tiny town (good for laughs!) then back to our neighborhood Starbucks for coffee (hot choc. with whipped cream for me!) and pastries. DH is watching The Godfather on DVD and I just finished up the Sunday paper (as always, searching the classified section for a fun job working with animals that pays what I make as a health care professional... ).

It's a GORGEOUS day (sunny and about 80 degrees) and I should be out planting the giant elephant ears and Hawaiian Ti plants we bought last weekend on the way home from WDW...but I guess they will stay in their pots until next weekend (which starts Thursday, since I work three 12 hour shifts).

 

[Muushka]

I slept in while DH walked the dog...then we headed over to a flea market in a nearby tiny town (good for laughs!) then back to our neighborhood Starbucks for coffee (hot choc. with whipped cream for me!) and pastries. DH is watching The Godfather on DVD and I just finished up the Sunday paper (as always, searching the classified section for a fun job working with animals that pays what I make as a health care professional... ).

It's a GORGEOUS day (sunny and about 80 degrees) and I should be out planting the giant elephant ears and Hawaiian Ti plants we bought last weekend on the way home from WDW...but I guess they will stay in their pots until next weekend (which starts Thursday, since I work three 12 hour shifts).

Oh my, we could be sisters! Including the health care professional!

 

[Liisa]

Hmmmm... we don't sound very bitter!