marathoning with spouse??

[mrsschlep]

DH and I have decided to run the half in Jan. Here's my question...do you and your spouse run together or just go at your own pace faster or slower then your spouse?? DH is in a lot better shape than me especially after have 3 kids, lol. I don't want to slow him down but he keeps telling me that we are going to finish together...I feel really bad about this because I feel like I'm holding him back. Having never done anything like this before, I thought you guys could help me feel better.

So do you run together or just meet up at the finish line???

 

[solotraveler]

First of all.... Congrats! and Welcome! I hope you'll join us over on the WISH running club thread!

I would say you should definately run together, so long as he's really alright with going your pace. Not only is it about finishing it together, but experiencing the race together as well. I'm sure that's how he's thinking and I wouldn't feel bad about it for a minute if I were you. (Mind you this is coming from someone who almost exclusively runs alone, so take it with a grain of salt).

There a few other people who have run the race with their spouses, so I'm sure they'll give their two cents as well!

Kevin (Solotraveler)

 

[wtpclc]

I hear your frustration over slowing dh down. My dh and I started in March last year adn neither one of us had trun in 15+ years.

DH was still much faster than me. It could be frustrating to know that you're giving your all and he is just struggling to stay back with you.

However, he appreciates me on the Long Runs, because he has a tendancy to be a rabbit.

For long/night runs, it was also very comforting (safe) running with him.

We are going for 2007 and doing it together again. Come race day, I was so glad we could share that together. We did cross that finish like together. believe it or not, he struggled in parts and wanted me to leave him (I don't think he realized he carreid me through other parts). I told him, "You never left me when we were trianing and I'm not leaving you now." SOunds silly, but it meant so much to be together.

Was it easy? No, ask many people here about the times I complained about him.

Could I have done it without him? I just don't know. It makes such a difference to have someone waiting to go out with you. I don't know if I could have trained for it on my own.

Two final pieces of advice:

1. If you're going to run the marathon together, you need to train together (at least for the Long runs)

2. Do not let yourself get frustrated. No matter how guilty you feel holding him back, run your pace. If you overwork yourself, you could get injured and that's the worst.

Let me know what you decide!

I'm going to go put the link to my marathon report in my siggie, so you should be able to look at that shortly too.

 

[Tiger Lily 03]

I usually train by myself too. Let me give yousome thought from my experience and perspective. My Bro went with me on my first 5k and another the year after. He is a marathoner and I feared slowing him down. He let me know it was his honor to go with me and if he wanted to go off on his own, he knew I would be ok with that. I have gone with ohers and have shared the experience with them and it is magnificent. Don't fret about keeping him back. As was already said however, if you decide to go at it together, do your LRs together. You can get your weekly training in as individuals if need be, but do those LRs and enjoy the training adventure together for sure.

Come over to the weekly traning thread and join us on our adventure. We love to share.

 

[mrsschlep]

Thank you so much for making me feel better! I have been lurking over at the running club thread for a couple weeks but haven't had the courage to join yet. Maybe you'll see me over there soon. I think I was under the assumption that you had to actually be a runner to join. But after lurking for a while I see that is definitly not the case. And wtpclc thanks for sharing your report...I loved looking at all the pics (especially the naked butt people in front of you ...too funny) Do all WISH runners get a shirt? Or did you make that one yourself?

Oh...and DH dragged my butt out of bed on Sunday and we ran 2 miles. I kept apologizing to him for being slow but he just kept saying how proud he was of me and that we were going to do this together. He makes my heart so happy! So we are planning on doing our training together (the long runs anyway) I still have about 20 lbs to lose so we are at different levels of exercising as well. So thanks to both of you for letting me know that it's ok to cross the finish line together!!

 

[mrsschlep]

Thanks Tiger Lily...we must have been posting at the same time!

 

[wtpclc]

Sounds like your dh is a sweetheart! That's awesoem!

The butt poeple had shirts that said Wide Load on the front. lol.

Last year, many of us got matching shirt for teh marathon. Last I knew, lizdotcom was trying to get generic shirts together for people to use in all their races. It is in the event board somewhere.

PLEASE join us in teh walking/runnign club thread. It's just a carryover from last year's training threads, but we didn't want to exclude anyone who wasn't doing the 07 marathon from joining us. Hence, the club. many of us started from nothing last year and made our way to the full or the half. I think you'll find a lot of support there. No courage needded to jump in. Just say hi!

 

[msblrobs]

My problem is I am faster than DH (at this point ) and I am always torn between trying to race my best after months of training or staying with DH and feeling cheated somehow.It is a difficult balance. I am sure DH feels like he is holding me back and/or feel obligated to push himself too hard also. For '07, DH is running the 1/2 and I'll do the full to eliminate the problem. I love running with DH for fun, but when it comes to racing, I am a competitor. However, when I ran the 1/2 with him in WDW, I stayed at his pace the entire time. I felt like I turned him into a runner and this was his first big race, so I wanted to share all of the joys with him.

 

[wfloyd]

DW and I train separately for the races. We have different paces and it is hard for us to keep up with each other. There were times last year that she would run and I would mostly walk and then jog to catch up with her every now and then. We mainly just do our own training program and hold each other accountable for what we have planned to do.

During the races we have done together, we start next to each other and then say goodbye. For the marathon we had cell phones and would call each other every 3 miles to see how the other was doing and offer encouragement. For the Race for the Taste 10k, after I finished I went back and found DW close to the finish and ran in with her.

 

[gradtchr]

My DH and I are training towards our first marathon in December and we had a long talk about what we would do. I feel bad because I feel like I hold him up but he said he didn't care that we were in this together and that we will cross that finish line together no matter if we get there fast or slow. Now we'll see what actually happens in December.

 

[Maherae]

Hi, Mrsschelp! You'll see DH and I towards the end of the pack of the 1/2 marathoners come January..but we'll be ahead of the sweepers!!

I started out with the desire to do the 1/2 marathon at WDW...me..over 50, overweight..and NEVER a runner! When I found out that I could do it walking..with training .. I signed up. Then DH saw that I was really serious and he got on board. Now, he WAS a runner, so once he got back in shape, I was a little concerned that I would hold him back. I've been doing Marathoning for Mortals on the Walk schedule since January 1st. DH just joins me on the LW's. He does his own training during the week. He will probably switch to the walk/run program in June. Last week was the first time that he left me on our long walks, and I was fine with it. I've told him that I think he should go at his pace, but on our first 1/2 he'll stay with me. When we first started passing 3 miles on our LW's, I was glad that he was doing it with me...we end up encouraging each other!! Now that we have done 8 miles and are confident that neither of us is going to pass out , he's more comfortable leaving me during the training.

From reading others' reports, it will be awesome to experience it together! Oh, and then I got into the DIS boards..and signed us up for the Minnie AND the DL 1/2!!

See ya in January!!

 

[wtpclc]

gradtchr and maherae - Dh and I are both so glad that we did it together. It is about the journey and sharing somethign together more than could he have a better time without you. I think you'll find it a very worthwhile journey!

 

[gradtchr]

Carrie-I agree it is a journey we are both glad to be on together.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Hubby and I did so together.

theoretically--he runs faster. In reality--I would beat him on an endurance event. He helps me maintain my desired pace--and I help his tired tushy finish .

Really COOL to have a built in buddy to run with!

(we didn't even get to train together as he was away. And the one training session I did with him I was ready to kill him as it was a post-surgery run in hilly/mountainy New Mexico and hubby needed a ticket on the clue bus. Let's just say I validated his ticket and he knew not to push me or offer coaching advice when I tell him to back off We did the race just fine together!)

 

[wtpclc]

hubby needed a ticket on the clue bus. Let's just say I validated his ticket and he knew not to push me or offer coaching advice when I tell him to back off We did the race just fine together!)

 

[keenercam]

Carrie -- I LOVE your story about how you and Scott supported each other. Lisa your story about the clue bus had me

My story is a bit different. I walk. DH runs. He doesn't jog. And he doesnt' walk fast enough to keep my consistent walking pace. He ran the 2006 WDW 1/2 full out and I walked it with a dear friend. DH and I both had wonderful experiences, but I know it would not have been the same if we'd tried to do the event together. He constantly competes against himself and really does have an inner rabbit that I, personally, think needs to be beat with a stick! However, I would not have enjoyed the event if I knew I was keeping him back. I finished, literally an hour and 10 minutes behind him. He called me when I was between miles 9 and 10 to let me know he was finished and had a "gorgeous Donald medal" (his words ).

Even now, when we are able to do long training sessions together, we go to an oval 1 1/8 mile track so that he can run and I can wog and eventually we pass each other and can "click" every once in a while. Of course, I do 4 miles in the time it takes him to do 7. I'm just glad that we are both putting the time in at the same place. Then, we go get breakfast and coffee together! :

Whatever you decide, I hope you enjoy the process and the progress!

 

[TXBelle]

My DH and I do not train together. He pushes me unintentionally, and I get frustrated. He is going to run the Goofy Challenge in 2007. I will cheer him on in the 1/2 marathon on Saturday, and we are going to run/walk the full marathon together on Sunday. I look forward to sharing the experience together. He will be my lab rat to see if I want to consider going Goofy in 2008.

 

[skfulkers]

My story is a bit different. I walk. DH runs. He doesn't jog. And he doesnt' walk fast enough to keep my consistent walking pace. He ran the 2006 WDW 1/2 full out and I walked it with a dear friend. DH and I both had wonderful experiences, but I know it would not have been the same if we'd tried to do the event together. He constantly competes against himself and really does have an inner rabbit that I, personally, think needs to be beat with a stick! However, I would not have enjoyed the event if I knew I was keeping him back. I finished, literally an hour and 10 minutes behind him. He called me when I was between miles 9 and 10 to let me know he was finished and had a "gorgeous Donald medal" (his words ).

Even now, when we are able to do long training sessions together, we go to an oval 1 1/8 mile track so that he can run and I can wog and eventually we pass each other and can "click" every once in a while. Of course, I do 4 miles in the time it takes him to do 7. I'm just glad that we are both putting the time in at the same place. Then, we go get breakfast and coffee together! :

Whatever you decide, I hope you enjoy the process and the progress!

Cam,

Krista and I are the same way. We don't run together. We've tried, and made it about a quarter mile, and decided that we would end up divorced at the end of our long run if we kept it up, so we've broken off and gone our own paces.
Not that we run extremely different paces, but it's just enough to take each of us out of our comfort zones for the run, so we do what you and Howard do--go to the same park or track and pass each other every mile or two and chat for a few seconds before we continue on.
We love doing it this way and we also usually go out for breakfast (or dinner) afterwards. It's a great "together" time for us, even if we're not side by side the entire time.

Steve

 

[keenercam]

Hi, Steve! Nice to see you here, and I am so glad that you and Krista have found a way to enjoy the time apart together. Just knowing I'll see Howard and be able to tell him how I am doing or give him a brightens my wog! And looking forward to COFFEE (and food) afterwards is a good motivator, too.

Funny, though, how Howard's personality comes through in these situations. Many people may remember he had emergency surgery on 12/31 and no one was sure he'd make it to Orlando at all. And he was on major painkillers and still in a lot of pain. His objective was first, to get on the plane, then to get to the start. But he kept saying "I've been training all year for this. I'll show up at the start and see how much I can do." He finished in 2:15 with about 9 potty breaks. Every time I saw a medical tent I wondered if he was in it. When he did call me to tell me he had finished, I felt like I could really enjoy the experience. All he could think of was how much better he could have done if he wasn't running with a stent (sp?) in. He finished his 2nd 1/2 marathon, in March, in less than 2 hours. His first full marathon is 5/21. Driven, I tell ya, DRIVEN!

Now you see why I can't train "with" him.