Looking For Control Freaks & Worry Warts too (Part 2)

[Camster0307]

Not sure what time you two are leaving but....................................

HAVE A MAGICAL, WONDERFUL TIME!!!!!!! ixiedust:

Take lots of pictures and I hope you guys get to meet!

 

[karajeboo]

DDs reckon they look like "bratz" - I reckon they just look smart - my rules are no low cuts, short skirts, or bellies on display - also, and they HATE me for it, no makeup except for lip gloss - EVER....... no exceptions. They are 6 and 7 and already have STRONG views on their "passion for fashion" ggggrrrrrrr bratz!!!!!!


Tessa

I HATE Bratz! The one toy that is banned in our house! They look like little tramps.

Good luck on the teaching asst position - sounds like you'd be great for it!

Renee - sounds like you got a lot done on your list, working outside all day yesterday!

Thanx everyone for the magical wishes! I WILL meet up with Debbie even if I have to stalk her through all four parks!!!!

 

[soontobewed07]

Have Fun!!!!!!!!

 

[CRdisMom]

I'm sure I missed both Kara and Debbie-- Have a magical time!!!

Cammie- that's too bad about the dance being dressy casual. I'm dreading when we get to that point. The uniforms Beth wears are a savior I can't imagine the "issues" we'd have if they weren't there. I know that the dances will be here before I know it.

 

[karajeboo]

Debbie - Wishing you and your family safe travels!!! See you tonight or tomorrow!

 

[Camster0307]

Hey guys!

Kara - What time are you heading out today? How's the weather looking? Hope you and Jeff have a very romantic time. Oh, and have a Grey Goose slushie for me!

So I just got up a little while ago. Took a clonazapem and went back to bed after the girls went off to school. I did not get much sleep last night - was tossing and turning all night long. Lauren had a very upsetting phone call with her dad which left her in tears and left me to pick up the pieces. I swear, I'm constantly amazed at the new levels of arrogance and stupidity that man reaches!

The problem this time? His new wife's nephew is making his bar mitzvah in Oct. They live in Baltimore and Lauren has met them a total of three times. I was informed by my ex, that even though it is his weekend with the girls, he was NOT taking Amanda because they have a schedule to keep that weekend and it would just be too hard to have her around. Nice, huh? But of course, they WANT Lauren to go. Lauren has informed her dad she has no desire to go: she's not Jewish and doesn't know these people, and quite frankly, doesn't care. He left the decision up to her and said, fine - you don't have to go. Well, last night he calls and (I think at the urging of his wife) expressed to Lauren how disappointed he was in her for not going; and that his wife and her family is very disappointed in her too! Then he says the kicker: lectures her on how sometimes "we" have to do things we don't necessarily want to but do it because it's the right thing to do!!! Ok - so here's where my head exploded!!! This man has spent the past six years of his life doing ONLY the things he wants to do, with NO regard as to whether it was right or wrong! And his daughters have been witness to it!

After taking 10 minutes to calm Lauren down, I attempted to call the jack*** and tell him off. He didn't answer his phone; and I know he knows I was calling - that freaking phone is attached to him 24/7. I tried three times over the course of 30 minutes and just gave up. It's probably best he didn't answer because we would have gotten into a HUGE fight which would not have accomplished a thing. If he was forcing her to go, I would fight with him to the bitter end, but I can't fight the way he thinks. The man lives in a world where everyone caters to him and thinks he's a great guy. He resents anybody who gives him a hard time about anything or when he doesn't get his way. So I'm thinking of just leaving this alone. I'm so mad he makes Lauren feel bad for the way she feels about things; but I don't think he's ever going to see the light regarding this manner. He wants us all to just forget his actions of the past and still give him the respect and consideration as if nothing had ever happened. Do you think it's the right thing to do? Like I said, he's not forcing her to go - and I'm proud of her for being honest about not wanting to. I guess I feel my role here is to just support her decisions and validate her feelings. Confronting him about this is just going to make him defensive and angry - which will then lead to tension I really don't want to deal with. Am I right? Seriously, if you guys think I'm being a wimp about it, let me know. I don't want to let Lauren down.

Thanks for listening!

 

[karajeboo]

Wait a minute. So he said that sometimes we have to do things that we don't want to do, because it's the right thing to do? But yes he's not wanting to take Amanda because it would be too difficult. What an A$$!!!

Yes, that was a capital A! Seriously, I don't think you're overreacting at all. Just be there for Lauren and let her vent. But I think she's old enough to make her own decisions at this point. If she doesn't want to go, then she shouldn't have to go. Right or wrong. If he says anything about it being a selfish decision, just tell him she's beginning to take after her father! Jerk.

Jeff is on his way home now. Yeah, supposed to leave work at 10, but called me at 11:30 to tell me that they're cleaning his car for him, so he just left then. Jerk. So when he walks in around 12:15, we'll throw out stuff in his car, run the dog by the kennel/vet, and be on the road by 1:00. So we should be checked in by 4ish! Then off to Epcot for my first slushie of the trip!!! Notice I said "first" which means there'll at least be a second!!!

Y'all have a great weekend and I'll try to post LIVE but not sure. For sure on Sunday though!!!

 

[Debbie6221]

Bye Gang..
We're off to the airport!
I will think about you guys all the time!
Thanks for all the well wishes.
Kara, can't wait to hug ya!!!!!

 

[CRdisMom]

cammie you are totally in the right on this one. For him to use the excuse we sometime have to do things, hello where's he been?! Taking one daughter and not the other because it is easier?!! As you can tell I'm ticked about this one and he's not even related to me. Just be there and support Lauren. She's a smart cookie. Prying question....the kid making the bar mitzva, is that his? either way Lauren doesn't have much to do with these people. I'm thinking it is just so he looks like a good dad to the "new" family.

Vent away dear that's why we are here....

 

[CRdisMom]

I have no idea about Bar or Bat mitvahs' in case you can't tell because I don't even know how to spell it.

 

[Camster0307]

Bye Kara and Debbie (although you've probably already left!) We'll miss you!

cammie you are totally in the right on this one. For him to use the excuse we sometime have to do things, hello where's he been?! Taking one daughter and not the other because it is easier?!! As you can tell I'm ticked about this one and he's not even related to me. Just be there and support Lauren. She's a smart cookie. Prying question....the kid making the bar mitzva, is that his? either way Lauren doesn't have much to do with these people. I'm thinking it is just so he looks like a good dad to the "new" family.
Vent away dear that's why we are here....

You hit the nail on the head with that one! I think they have her family thinking they are parents of the year and everything is hunkey-dorey. Also wondering if her family even knows if both of them cheated on their spouses to get together! Anyway, the bar mitzvah (I have NO IDEA how to spell it either! ) is for the new wife's nephew. They spend a lot of time with that side of the family; but they rarely come to Mass. and therefore hardly spend anytime with Amanda or Lauren. That's why Lauren is so indifferent about it. They don't feel like family to her.

And the whole not taking Amanda thing: Lauren was so mad because he's saying how disappointed everyone will be because she's not there; but she wanted to ask if no one will be disappointed Amanda is not there? Oh right - that's ok because HE'S the one who made that decision.

And I REALLY would love to get a dig in about the "doing the right thing" comment; but I shall take the high road! That would just bring more trouble than it would be worth!

Thanks for letting me get this all off of my chest. It really doesn help to run these things by you guys - you're all slightly less emotional about the issues! Although it now sounds like I may be getting some of you worked up as much as me about it!

 

[CRdisMom]

hello! If I had read your post all the way I would have known it was a step cousin. Then in that case she's totally right not to go. heck i didn't make it to most of my cousins confirmations.

 

[Camster0307]

hello! If I had read your post all the way I would have known it was a step cousin. Then in that case she's totally right not to go. heck i didn't make it to most of my cousins confirmations.

Yep, you're right. That's why I think the main reason they want her to go is simply for "appearances" sake.

 

[Camster0307]

I sware, how much to get you to dress me? Those two daughters of yours always look amazingly cute.

You say the sweetest things! I may not be able to make the clothes, but I know how to put together an outfit! How are you feeling these days? And you better come back and play!

Cammie - we have LOTS of "dressy casual" dances and disco type things over here - we go for black trousers (straight leg) with a black or bright coloured strappy sequin top on most occasions - DDs reckon they look like "bratz" - I reckon they just look smart - my rules are no low cuts, short skirts, or bellies on display - also, and they HATE me for it, no makeup except for lip gloss - EVER....... no exceptions. They are 6 and 7 and already have STRONG views on their "passion for fashion" ggggrrrrrrr bratz!!!!!!

Well, supposedly the school has a rule against any strappy tops; and the skirts must be fingertip length. Funny though - I looked at photos from last year's 7th grade dance and I saw alot of camisoles being worn as shirts. Thankfully, Lauren not very comfortable wearing tops like that; she will wear a camisole under a t-shirt if she thinks the t-shirt is too see through. And, I'm with you on the make-up: lip gloss only in this house also!

 

[TinaLala]

Cammie - my DH wants me to tell you - "good riddens to bad trash, no wonder you divorced him." Your in the right to let your girls make the decision because they will thank you in the long run. They'll be able to see what kind of person your ex is and hopefully he'll realize how much of a jerk he is when his kids don't want to be with him. Plus if you step in one inch it will causeso much friction between your ex and his wife with you that it might make things horrible for you and the girls. The nerve to pick one child over the other because it's 'inconvenient' for them. I think his new wife is a psycho b$$$$ as well. Hello GF you married him and his kids all together and if you don't like it - tough.

I have a friend whose wife was having an affair and didn't want to be married anymore so she had the police arrest my friend in their home, in front of their children calling him a child molester. Then she blackmailed the girls for years making them think their father was horrible and whenever they wanted to go over his house she would say, 'go ahead, but we're going shopping and you're not going to be able to get anything if you go over his house.' Totally munipulative. She even tried to go on their Disney vacation, that he had planned and paid for, while they were going through the divorce. He now calls her the Anti-Christ because anything else would be mean.

Stay strong GF!!!

 

[soontobewed07]

Cammie- I agree your EX is a total JERK!!!!! I would leave it alone. You don't want him saying he is not going to take care of Amanda in Feb. If I remember correctly this is how it happens ( From my childhood). If he says anything to you just say "Lauren doesn't want to go without Amanda" and leave it at that. It will show you ARE the better person.

 

[Camster0307]

You guys are the best! Thanks for all of your support!

Tina - Tell your hubby I said thanks also. His comments cracked me up! I knew my "sistas" on this thread would support me; but it's always nice to hear another guy recognize and agree when one of his own sex is being a jerk! And through everything - I do know I'm better off without him!

Of course he called tonite and pretended nothing was wrong. Now Lauren is worried to go with him this weekend because she's afraid they'll gang up on her about it again. What can I do though? I just told her to stick to her guns - she has nothing to feel guilty about.

Thanks again everyone! You've helped to make me feel better about the situation!

 

[MAGICFOR2]

Hi Cammie - I know I'm a bit late, but I just wanted to chime in with everyone else. Your ex is definately an A$$. The fact that he can't be bothered with Amanda and then puts pressure about the new wife's family being disappointed in her - WTH I bet the "family" doesn't even know about it - just like Laura said, he's just trying to create this perfect picture. Good for you for teaching her to stick up for herself!

 

[Camster0307]

Good morning all!

It was mighty chilly this morning. I think we've seen the last of our summer days around here. We have "frost warnings" in effect for tonite; should only be around 35 degrees tomorrow when the girls head out to school!

Which now means I have to start the task of switching out the summer clothes for the winter clothes. UGH! I will then have to deal with how many things Lauren has outgrown and how much money I'll have to spend to get her a new wardrobe. I swear, it's never ending the things I need to buy that child! I'm lucky Amanda doesn't grow at the same rate - her clothes seem to fit her for years!

Tammie - Thanks for chiming in with your support. It should be interesting when the girls are with him this weekend. I hope he just now drops the issue and doesn't try to pressure her even more. Anyway, did you make any decisions regarding your ADRs? When do you leave for your cruise? It's coming up soon, isn't it?

Hope everyone has a good day! Will check in later!

 

[MAGICFOR2]

Good morning all!

It was mighty chilly this morning. I think we've seen the last of our summer days around here. We have "frost warnings" in effect for tonite; should only be around 35 degrees tomorrow when the girls head out to school!

Which now means I have to start the task of switching out the summer clothes for the winter clothes. UGH! I will then have to deal with how many things Lauren has outgrown and how much money I'll have to spend to get her a new wardrobe. I swear, it's never ending the things I need to buy that child! I'm lucky Amanda doesn't grow at the same rate - her clothes seem to fit her for years!

Tammie - Thanks for chiming in with your support. It should be interesting when the girls are with him this weekend. I hope he just now drops the issue and doesn't try to pressure her even more. Anyway, did you make any decisions regarding your ADRs? When do you leave for your cruise? It's coming up soon, isn't it?

Hope everyone has a good day! Will check in later!

Good Morning Cammie. Funny you can know your weather. We really never know. In Aug we had a week of cold and frost at night, temps in the 60s in the daytime. This past 3 weeks it has been 90 in the daytime and 40 at night. It is supposed to start cooling down to the 70s now. We don't get our Summer until July for sure, so we usually have what they call Indian Summer until October, with the cold weather hitting just at Halloween.

We leave for our vacation in 8 days! We're not doing a cruise as originally planned, but we're going to Puerto Vallarta Mexico at an all inclusive resort on the beach! We're getting really excited - I am so ready for a break, and Jim really needs a vacation! It will be great to spend time with Ryan and Dana and little Mason, who are coming with us. I need to start packing this weekend.

TGM says that except for CM and CRT we can't make ADRs until the 90 day mark Which trip did you just do yours for, the Nov or the Feb?