Long hair over 40.

[disney212]

I am over 40 (quite over, but shhh, not telling!!) and I have long hair. I also, as others said, had a mother who thought short hair was easier to care for so I always had short hair as a child and HATED HATED it!!!! I vowed I would never have it as an adult. I love my hair and would never cut it. I find it easy to care for and can put it up when I want to. I think whatever you want to do it fine. No rules anymore!

I would never tell. Kind of funny story. I work with a bunch of executives, I am the only girl. A while back they,were joking about their wives getting younger or staying the same age every birthday. They asked my opinion. I told them that I am going to lie about my age I would make myself 15+ years older. They looked confused. I explained that if I am 47 and say I am 30 then the gossip would be either how old I looked or that I was lying. If I say I am 60 the gossip would be how good I look or who was the doctor who did such great work. If I am going to be talked about I would prefer it to,be flattering. A few days later at another meeting the all said they told my story to their wives and they all said they were going to start doing it too.

 

[disney212]

I'm surprised that your husband would pass that opinion from his mother on to you. It seems rather passive aggressive to me. Maybe your husband wants you to cut it?

Since you obviously love your hair and think it looks great why even question it here?

I actually heard his side of the conversation, he didn't volunteer the info. I was in no way questioning my hair, just looking for others views. If 10000 folks said I shouldn't have long hair it wouldn't bother one bit. Be happy! Sorry you over analyzed that one and I also stated DH loves my hair.

 

[EMode]

I think the notion that women over 40 should have short hair is old fashioned. I'll be 41 in a few weeks and my hair hits just above my bra-strap right now. Its a little longer than I like but I don't get it cut higher than my shoulders. Ironically I spent most of my 20's and early 30's with pretty short hair.

 

[OceanAnnie]

People are so different. There is just no one rule to fit everyone. You have to live with your hair. If you like it, keep it the way it is. Pretend that you never heard a word about your hair from your MIL. It's one of those areas of "noneya".


Note to self: This is a case of learning from example of what kind of MIL you don't want to be. She may have been well meaning, but it wasn't very nice to go there.

 

[leebee]

That damned pixie cut. Mine was so short, I had razor stubble on the back of my neck. I looked just like a boy. I cried for DAYS. My mom didn't get it, she just thought it was easier for her to maintain. That cut is what made me determine that DD could have whatever hair she wanted.

I haven't had my own hair cut since November 1992. It's always been thick, curly/fuzzy, and dry, and I have to blow dry and heat curl it to maintain any semblance of control! It became very long, almost to my waist. Unfortunately, not only has it stopped growing, but it breaks easily, and is now only a bit longer than shoulder length (but still long enough for a good pony tail!). It's also thinning as I age, which makes it easier to deal with. I am not sure what to do about it anymore, as I don't want it to continue to break. I use a decent amount of product that was recommended by a stylist, but I am still afraid it's going to break off until nothing is left!

 

[nikkistevej]

I am 41, mine is about to my bra strap, it's curly and not too thick or thin, so I wear ponytails a lot, sometimes I straighten it, not normally in the summer though. I do have blond and purple streaks in it though, I love it and get compliments on it all the time. The purple streaks last about 4-6 months too.The stepsisters at Disney raved about it. LOL I think it's all up to what you like!

 

[trishwal]

For those ladies who have shown pics of your long hair - you ALL look beautiful! I totally agree that everyone should wear their hair the way THEY feel most comfortable. My hair was cut (well, I actually cut the front first) when I was a kindergartener and I was so crushed to lose my long hair that I now proudly wear it almost to my waist, Ariel-style.

And part of me feels bad about getting my daughter the Victoria Beckham bob when she was little but she wouldn't LET me take care of her hair and she would literally get mats in it. Plus, it was so AWESOME looking when she was playing soccer at age 8. She's 13 now and her hair is almost as long as mine so she decided much earlier than me to grow her hair out. I first grew mine out in my 20's, and now I'm WELL into my 40's and it keeps me feeling young.

 

[disney212]

That damned pixie cut. Mine was so short, I had razor stubble on the back of my neck. I looked just like a boy. I cried for DAYS. My mom didn't get it, she just thought it was easier for her to maintain. That cut is what made me determine that DD could have whatever hair she wanted.

I haven't had my own hair cut since November 1992. It's always been thick, curly/fuzzy, and dry, and I have to blow dry and heat curl it to maintain any semblance of control! It became very long, almost to my waist. Unfortunately, not only has it stopped growing, but it breaks easily, and is now only a bit longer than shoulder length (but still long enough for a good pony tail!). It's also thinning as I age, which makes it easier to deal with. I am not sure what to do about it anymore, as I don't want it to continue to break. I use a decent amount of product that was recommended by a stylist, but I am still afraid it's going to break off until nothing is left!

Sorry to hear you endured the dreaded pixie cut also.

Try Carol's Daughter. I lost about 30 percent of my hair in 2012 after cancer treatment (I was blessed to keep 70 percent). I also started to experience breakage. One night I was watching QVC and saw it and figured I would give it a go. It worked for me. Thankfully my hair grows fast and it wasn't really noticeable.

 

[suzimar57]

56 here with hair past my shoulders!

it was that Toni perm when i was 6 that did it for me - cried for days

my mother thought it was sooo cute - ugh, no it wasn't

the pictures don't lie.....

can still imagine that awful perm smell.....

when that mess grew out, my mother decided bangs were the way to go

except she always kept them about 1" short from my hairline

she never let me grow my bangs longer than that

again, not a flattering look at any age....

at 81 she wears HER hair what i call "military short" - practically a buzz cut

my balding father at 81 has more hair on HIS head.

crazy old woman....

 

[Myothername]

I think the key phrase on this thread is "as long as it is well maintained". Too many times I see women over 40 (I and 52) with long hair that is either drab and droopy, extremely thin or just looks plain horrible. And I believe when you get older if your hair looks bad it just makes you look that much older. Just my opinion. Me? I have short hair because even though I have been blessed with thick wavy hair the longer it gets the bushier it gets. I don't have the time or patience to fix it every day. Now all I have to do is wet it and fluff it and blow dry it if I want to.

 

[disney212]

56 here with hair past my shoulders!

it was that Toni perm when i was 6 that did it for me - cried for days

my mother thought it was sooo cute - ugh, no it wasn't

the pictures don't lie.....

can still imagine that awful perm smell.....

when that mess grew out, my mother decided bangs were the way to go

except she always kept them about 1" short from my hairline

she never let me grow my bangs longer than that

again, not a flattering look at any age....

at 81 she wears HER hair what i call "military short" - practically a buzz cut

my balding father at 81 has more hair on HIS head.

crazy old woman....

You post made me laugh. Sorry you had hair trauma too. Maybe that is why we love long hair.

 

[jdb in AZ]

I just hit the big 47 and MIL (not my biggest fan) asked DH if I was going to cut my hair. It hits mid back and is styled close to Marie Osmond or Valerie Bertaneli. It is very thick and wavy and I consider it my best feature. I love that it only takes a few minutes to style and I also like that I can wear it many different ways. I started noticing that most of the women I work with cut their hair short when they have kids, I did not but I wore a lot more pony tails. Do you think long hair is somehow wrong after 40. P.S. I do get compliments all the time on my hair.

Is there an age you consider to old for long hair?

How does your DH feel about your hair? His opinion is a lot more important than his mother's. after all. Enjoy it while you've got it -- old age will thin it out eventually, and you'll know when it's time to "let it go, let it go...." Ask me how I know this.

 

[powellrj]

I grew my hair out a few years ago and I was one of the people who long hair aged. I really wanted to keep it long, but it just wasn't becoming on me. It made my face look haggered and tired. Now its about shoulder length and it looks much better. I also darkened it which helped too. The white hair was just too aging.

Those that say they like to keep it long to wear in a pony tail. I have seen many women my age (55) who have long thin hair in a scrunchie that really ages them. If you have thicker, healthy hair go for it, but if its gotten thin and scraggly, you might want to have a trim.

 

[disney212]

How does your DH feel about your hair? His opinion is a lot more important than his mother's. after all. Enjoy it while you've got it -- old age will thin it out eventually, and you'll know when it's time to "let it go, let it go...." Ask me how I know this.

DH loves my hair, MIL hates every hair on my head (ha ha). I am lucky that my hair really thick. My dad just turned 69 & and still has his thick wavy hair and not much grey, hoping I inherited that from him. My mom had awful hair she said, always wore it short.

 

[disney212]

I grew my hair out a few years ago and I was one of the people who long hair aged. I really wanted to keep it long, but it just wasn't becoming on me. It made my face look haggered and tired. Now its about shoulder length and it looks much better. I also darkened it which helped too. The white hair was just too aging.

Those that say they like to keep it long to wear in a pony tail. I have seen many women my age (55) who have long thin hair in a scrunchie that really ages them. If you have thicker, healthy hair go for it, but if its gotten thin and scraggly, you might want to have a trim.

I totally agree with you! The only time I wear a scrunchie is the gym. A well executed thick pony tail would not be caught dead in one.

 

[Christine]

I grew my hair out a few years ago and I was one of the people who long hair aged. I really wanted to keep it long, but it just wasn't becoming on me. It made my face look haggered and tired. Now its about shoulder length and it looks much better. I also darkened it which helped too. The white hair was just too aging.

Those that say they like to keep it long to wear in a pony tail. I have seen many women my age (55) who have long thin hair in a scrunchie that really ages them. If you have thicker, healthy hair go for it, but if its gotten thin and scraggly, you might want to have a trim.

I agree with all this.

I am 50 and I have never really worn my hair long because it's fine/thin and grows very slowly. Over the last few years, I've grown it out "longer" but I will say that my hair quality/luster ain't what it used to be and I haven't even gone gray!!

That said, I'm around a lot of 50+ women who continue to wear their hair long. Some look fine, others do not. But of all of them, none of them really have "beautiful" hair anymore so it is kind of aging them. Contrast that with the younger women in the office who also have long hair and some of them have REALLY pretty hair.

 

[wvjules]

I don't understand the point of having long hair and keeping it in a bun, braid, or pony tail all the time either. What's the point? Have long hair so you cankeep it tied up?

 

[disney212]

I don't understand the point of having long hair and keeping it in a bun, braid, or pony tail all the time either. What's the point? Have long hair so you cankeep it tied up?

I normally wear my hair down. Hair up or pony tails at the gym, Disney, beach, cruise ship (wind) are a must for me.

 

[Sparkleshine]

I think it really depends on your hair health. Long hair looks good when it's in great shape but doesn't look good on a person of ANY age when it's scraggly and damaged looking.

Like in this before after, her hair was too long IMO before but looks much better after.

 

[Christine]

I think it really depends on your hair health. Long hair looks good when it's in great shape but doesn't look good on a person of ANY age when it's scraggly and damaged looking.

Like in this before after, her hair was too long IMO before but looks much better after.

That's a great example. That long hair looks pretty bad.