Letter to the teacher

[Scurvy]

OP, you are doing nothing but underminding you daughter teacher. My daughter is in kindergarten and she gets home work sheets, They take maybe 1o mintues at the most. We are teaching her homework comes first before anything even play.

I agree. If you are going to enroll your child in public school, you need to avoid undermining the teachers. If you don't feel that you can do that then perhaps homeschooling is a better choice.

I don't like homework, but of course I understand that sometimes it's a "necessary evil". Even as a teacher I don't like to assign any more work than necessary. As a parent I greatly prefer the years when my son has teachers who don't assign much work. (This year he has very little homework, but in a couple of previous years he had multiple hours of homework almost every night. I hated those years!) However, we have always taught our son that homework is to be done before anything fun after school. He doesn't have to like it, he just has to do it so he can move on to things that he enjoys. In the case of studying for spelling tests, I have never felt that there ought to be a specific amount of time spent on the studying. If the child gets 100 % correct on the test then clearly they are doing something right. If they don't, then they need to study more. It sounds like the OP's child needs to study more.

I'd hope the teacher is professional enough to not take it out on OP's daughter, but I wouldn't be surprised if the letter made the rounds in the faculty room.

I'd be shocked if it didn't make the rounds. The OP and her letter are likely to be remembered at that school for years to come. I don't really understand the point of it, honestly. It isn't going to convince the teacher to stop assigning homework or to excuse the OP's child for the wrong answers on her spelling tests. I agree with previous posters - if the only point was to let the teacher know you don't intend to do what she suggests, I think it would have been better to skip the letter.

As an aside, to those who feel that elementary grades aren't important: There are two reasons that grades received in elementary school are important. The first is obvious - it's how we know how much the child is learning. If a child repeatedly gets lower than expected grades in a certain subject, it means that the child needs more help in that subject. The second reason is less obvious. The grades that children get in elementary school are used to determine what classes to place them in for middle school. A child who gets good grades throughout elementary school is likely to be placed in the more advanced middle school classes. A child who has lower grades won't be placed in advanced classes. As an example, obviously no one will care in 20 years what grade your child got in science in fourth grade, but your fifth grader might care that he's stuck in a less advanced science class just because he spent his fourth grade year goofing off instead of getting good grades.

 

[NHdisneylover]

OP says this on page 2:

No worries about the thread getting ugly, I am quite capable of letting differing opinons roll off my back. No harm no foul.

The thread does not get particularly ugly--most comments disagree but are respectful. One person writes a paradoy letter which is uncalled for but hysterical and many posters would be able to laugh at themselves had they been the OPif this were posted. It is the closest thing to getting ugly taht I saw--and seemed to be a bit of poking fun in a meanspirited way but more meant to lighten up the mood. And then, only a littel later on page 6 OP posts:

Mods, if you want to shut it down now, I am game. It has run its course.

OP--if you do come back you need to know that with your attitudes towards traditional schooling you will face much worse tahn this thread in reality in the schools. You should be prepared whenever you walk in with these types of letters, or any other thing that flaunts the rules and traditions to handle yourself nicely nd firmly in the face of much tougher criticism than you have seen here.

 

[tlens]

My daughter's homework in grade 1 gave me the knowledge that she had a problem before the school ever brought it up to me. Because she was having difficulties reading, I could be proactive about it long before the school would inform me via report cards. I got her the help she needed and now is an awesome student. 5th grade. Without that work coming home, I would have been clueless.

 

[Sorsha]

Having a little more respect for the school and the learning process would be helpful, too. Your argument that "I was unschooled and turned out fine" is belied by the fact that you don't feel capable fo homeschooling past thrid grade.

One more response - even though I said I was done - stopped back in after loading up the laundry.

People, I said I didn't feel I was qualified to homeschool past third grade NOT because I don't feel educationally qualified. There are a lot of things taught in the upper grades that I simply have no experience with. I am not a talented artist, I am a sucky typist (obviously). I have no experience with musical theory, and I am not up on my library sciences. I speak no foreign languages (other than a smattering of Spanish) and I have never been able to grasp Chemistry. YES I could certainly teach reading, writing, and 'rithmetic quite well, but I refuse to have them miss out on other opportunities that I am not capable to provide. OK?? Thanks, done now.

 

[ccgirl]

Since the OP asked, I would say that yes you went overboard. My DD is 7 and in first grade. She does homework when she gets home then gets to play as a reward. As a PP suggested, sometimes we practice spelling words while she is in the tub. I know play is important but learning is equally as important. I am glad you thanked the teacher for all she does but if I was that teach, I would definitely think you were "one of those" parents.If your child's bus ride is that long, they have already had enough decompression time. All families are busy at night. Somehow, I manage to get home at 5:30, eat dinner by 6pm, do baths and have my DD7 ready for her 8pm bedtime on top of caring for my DS2 and getting him ready for his 7:30 bedtime. Homework is always checked as soon as I get home. In my opinion (since you asked) you need to put a little more emphasis on the schoolwork.

 

[trip]

My opinion is that school work can be mixed with play. For example, my DD practiced her spelling word in the tub. We would spray some of the foaming soap on the sides of the tub and she would write with her finger. She also used some of the foam stick on letters to write them. We practiced math facts this way as well.

I just had to comment on practicing in the tub. That's how my DD's learned their muliplication tables. One on one time with no distractions - it's amazing how much can get done in 15 minutes. She'd still have 45 minutes of her bath to decompress!

 

[Bren's Mom]

OP, that letter sounded (to me) very sanctimonious. I'm sure that's now how you intended it, but it's how it came across. The bottom line for me is that we have a responsibility to teach our children respect for their teachers as well as respect for the rules, of society in general, of the classroom, etc. I think you're teaching your daughter to DISrespect her teacher. Seems to me that your parenting ideal of having lots of free time and play for your dd is wonderful, I applaud that. But it also seems that it would not be a hardship to incorporate 5 minutes of spelling EVERY night as this homework IS part of her education and it IS expected of her. She should learn early that her education IS her job for the next good number of years and that you expect her to do her job as well as she can. At the same time, it's your job to protect her...so limiting that homework so she's not doing hours worth, or making she she has down time...that's great and she deserves to be protected in this manner. BOTH can coexist, imo.