let's talk: swaps

[MomOf2DisneyKids]

ok, I'll put it out there....it's like the elephant that's in the middle of the room....

Swaps. Problems. More swaps with more problems. It's NUTS!

I'm not talking about the genuine reasons why people (swappers and/or hostesses) might be late sometime...this is about making a commitment, sticking with it, telling the truth about it, and asking for help if you need it!

We all know that swaps are 'do at your own risk', but for goodness sake, swapping certainly seems to have become a risky business here these days.

 

[kaddjr]

ITA! Sing it sista!

Seriously though, there has only been 1 swap I was in that I was really worried about and it did come. Others haven't been as fortunate.

 

[AlexWyattMommy]

Is this what you .... before?

Being a newcomer, the resort swap was my first, I wasn't sure if I was just paranoid or if the problem was real.

I've noticed that in most, but not all, the swaps I signed up for, there are have been flakers. Good for me cause I got to sign up for more items, but really annoying for the hostesses. I am still waiting to see the results of some finished swaps that should have been or close to being mailed.

Has this been a recent development? And most importantly, are the people not keeping their commitments the same ones? Perhaps all current and past hostesses should compare notes and flag the repeat offenders.

We all understand that life happens. And sometimes we bite off more than we can handle. (uhm swapaholic here and I haven't even seen any items yet ) But I think if we see we are in trouble, we should give the hostesses time to find angels to keep the swap from being delayed. Which I myself am going to do right now with the paint can swap. I finished 10 for two of my groups, but I don't think I'm going to get more than 3 or 4 for one of my groups. So off to PM my hostess.

 

[New England Eeyore]

It is a very sticky situation. I think we all get kind of excited when a swap comes up or we get an idea for a swap and maybe some of us bite off a little more than we can chew.

I don't know that there's any good answer though.

I know when I sign up I try to think of it as a commitment with the deadline written in stone. I have had my DH ask me more than once why I can't seem to find the time to clean the bathroom or go grocery shopping. I simply tell him, look I made a commitment to these ladies and I must finish this stuff first. Of course, then after I finish one project I tend to sign up for another swap and the bathroom never does get cleaned. Hey, he knows how to clean it too!

 

[potterphreak]

Yeah, I'm still waiting to receive my items from a swap that was due in August. <sigh>

Have there been any other problems? And with the Paint Can swap, I don't understand the deal there. We signed up to do 3 cans with the option to do more if we wanted to get more back, no? If no, please let me know! LOL Need to make more cans! HAHAHAHA

 

[hopemax]

I signed up for my first swaps this summer, and like most everyone else, I signed up for a bunch of them. And watching them all finish up and come back, I have noticed that there are some people who are regularly speedy with their packages and others that seem to always be the last packages in.

I have noticed the problem swaps. My first swap, was the MGM swap, where unfortunately TPCShauna had emergency surgery, then complications, and other issues. So it took a long time to get that swap back. And while I think she did a reasonable job keeping us updated, there were streteches without hearing anything, where I'm sure some people were starting to get that "uh, oh, what is going on here, feeling.

I think there are times, when it's more just life getting in the way. I have no reason not to believe Bigsis had a close family member die, and was in a car accident like what was said. I would like to think that if something BIG happened in my life, I would be responsible enough to contact someone. But if the something BIG happened to ME, my husband might know enough to post something, but if it was serious enough, probably not. And no one else close to me would even know that anything needed to be done. How much of us actually have an emergency plan that includes "notify the DIS Scrapping Board?"

I know that some of you are close to another board member. Someone that it would be easy to hand off to, or it would be easy to say, "If something happens to me," call so and so and she will handle this stuff. Someone who would, if you disappeared, would drive over and pound on your door to make sure you were alright. And that is FABULOUS! It would be great if all hostesses could have an emergency backup, but I don't know if that is reasonable option for everyone.

I feel really bad for AlexWyattMommy and the other people who didn't receive their stuff. But I am also worry for the hostesses, that nothing really serious has happened. But I will have faith that even if it takes a really, really long time, they will get their stuff. But I am more than willing to make another set of my stuff (I was in 3 of AlexWyattMommy's) groups and send them directly to you, if no one is able to make contact with Bigsis.

 

[ddavis860]

Glad this is being talked about...

We all know that sometimes life gets in the way...

And sometimes the dog eats your swap

I think it all boils down to communication with the hostess and the group. I have been lucky to get all my swaps...sometimes 2 months late, but some in that group haven't gotten anything...that's just wrong. I have also been in contact with hostesses that have been really wonderful when I have had a problem.

Flagging repeat offenders isn't a bad idea...but who keeps the list? Is it made public...like a sticky with the flakers names at the beginning of the swap board? Is it private...a "go to" person keeps the list, and swappers can PM to see if a hostess is a flake, and hostesses can contact to see if the swapper is a repeat offender? Maybe the mods need to get involved so there can be a poll as to how and where the list is kept.

Is this an ongoing problem or something new? I've been in several swaps and I'm curious too...

 

[AlexWyattMommy]

And with the Paint Can swap, I don't understand the deal there. We signed up to do 3 cans with the option to do more if we wanted to get more back, no? If no, please let me know! LOL Need to make more cans! HAHAHAHA

No, I just put more pressure on myself than I needed to here. We did sign up to do 3 cans with the option to do more. I said I would 4 for each group, than in my head I thought I needed to do one for each person in my group. I have right now 5 for Pooh-Easter which is all that is in that group, and 5 princesses which is all I want back, so if I make the 5 Mickey, I've made more than I committed to and kept my committment and now need to be committed someplace quiet.

HopeMax, thank you so much for the offer. But you already made me one, I just haven't received it. It would not be right to ask you or anyone else to do more than your fair share. If you could tell me what you liked and didn't like about the elements I made, it'll help me for the Good vs Evil, sorry folks for those in my other swaps, I've already finished those items.

 

[MomOf2DisneyKids]

ok LOL about the dog eating your swap! (that really happened, right??)

AWM ...

I do see some repeat offenders here, enough that I will not join anymore swaps where I will be in the same group as they are.

One of the things that bothers me the most, honestly, is the waiting and waiting after a swap is due, for people who say that they will mail or worse yet, already HAVE mailed, yet the things never arrive, and then we've waited for nothing. I don't want to name names or to list specific swaps that this has/IS happening in...if anyone wants to look, it's easy to find. I'm not in all of the swaps going on now, but I feel terrible for the people who have been waiting for months for their stuff or who are not going to get anything in return for all of their hard work, effort, time, and money. And I would not be surprised to see the same type of problems in swaps that are due in the next week/month or so.

I don't know what the solution is. I don't think that a public flaker list would go over big here...but I'm guessing that some of us probably have a list in our head. Delivery confirmations? Co-hostesses for every swap? A 'too bad so sad' deadline where things are returned unopened? A grace period of a few days if a del conf # is provided by the last day of the swap? Just deal with whatever happens? I don't know. I'm starting to think that the solution for me is to just stop swapping. (hmm, maybe I'd have more time to actually SCRAP???)

 

[hopemax]

And it's not right that you held up your end of the deal, and end up with nothing. Really, it's not a problem. At the end of every swap, there is extra paper, and extra supplies. And I am one of those people, that CAN'T through anything away, so I end up with all these extra pieces just sitting around making a mess. Consider it helping me clean up my stash.

And I was so overzealous in cleaning up my swap items, that I emptied everything from the baggies into one drawer, so I'm sorry to say, I don't know what pieces were yours. But if you PM me, and tell me what you made, and I will let you know what I thought. But everything in that swap was pretty wonderful.

EDIT: I just realized I can match up the elements with the names in the groups, so I can figure out which ones were yours. Plus you HAVE to get my WL stuff, we used the same paper! (the green with the acorns)

As for the bigger flaker problem. I think a list may cause more bad feelings. Would there be a way to get yourself off of a list if whatever situation got you on the list were resolved? I think a better solution would be for hostesses to enforce their deadlines. A two week grace period should be sufficient to catch all the "dog ate my swap," everyone got sick, normal busy stuff. I think lax deadlines encourage procrastination and repeat offenders. I know the inclination is to be understanding, but sometimes enough is enough. But that's just my two cents, and I'm not sure what you can get with that these days.

 

[Mickeyteacher]

As a hostess and a swapper, I too have noticed an increase in flakers. In fact, in the Secret Sister Swap, I'm afriad I have a flaker on my hands- I have an angel waiting to step in but it makes me sad that we have to deal with this type of stuff. As for a list, I think we need to have a list. I was too stupid when I did sign-ups to realize that this person has or is in the process of holding up several other swaps. I wish I had noticed.
If we have a list, I think a person can only take themselves off of the list if the complete a number of swap early- they are in by an earlier date which would allow for an angel if the flake again.
I know that life gets in the way, I have had it happen twice since I have been swapping on this board. Both times, I checked in, gave a date that I would complete my items and asked for help when I needed it.
I know we are not perfect people, and things happen, but all we ask for is communication and a timely turn around.

Just my $.02
Shawna

 

[patchchild]

The problem really does seem to be growing. So far, it hasn't seemed like any of the swaps have had unreasonable deadlines. In fact, most of the swappers seem to be getting their things in early. There are certain names that keep coming up as either very late or not showing up at all and really, it just stinks. A lot of effort goes into the swaps from so manu people, and getting burned is just the worst.

I guess it basically boils down to, if you sign up, do it. If you can't, post and say so. Even at the last minute. I don't think there is anyone here who's going to be mad because someone had to drop out, as long as they alert the group. It's the people who just vanish who seem to be causing a lot of the problems.

 

[rlovew]

I too have seen certain swappers whose stuff always ends up coming in late or doesn't seem to arrive at all. I know that through October my stuff has been sent in right before the deadline. I offered to overnight it so it would be on time in one of the swaps but was told to not worry about it because so many people were a little late.

I would have to agree that people need to honor their commitments and be willing to just say sorry I can't do this if it comes down to being overcommitted for what ever reason.

I guess it is up to the swap hostesses but I would have to say if you have a deadline and you give a short grace period (maybe a week) and things haven't arrived then it is time to say I am sorry but we will have to swap without you. It would be up to those of us who are mailing things in at the last minute to put delivery confirmation on our packages so we could track them on the way to the swap.

 

[ddavis860]

ok LOL about the dog eating your swap! (that really happened, right??)

Um yeah, it happened to me...dog chewing away at my Christmas Holiday Swap...dumb dog...

And, honestly, I would hate to be on a public flakers list. I would hate to be on any flakers list. But if a hostess thinks it would be helpful, maybe a private list that hostesses report to would be in order?

Maybe we have to give phone numbers along with addresses. My DH would answer a call, act totally clueless, and if I was hurt or something and not be able to finish, I think the hostess would get the general idea...

 

[knovak]

I make sure I only join when I know I can make the due date. I also try to make sure I get everything done ahead of the due date and out. When I know someone else is depending on me - I would hate to not come through. As said before - life does happen, but the adult thing to do is let the hostess know what your situation is and not just blow it off.

 

[MomOf2DisneyKids]

I said this in another thread, but I want to say it here also. My gripe is not with hostesses who choose to wait....it's really with the swappers who ask them to wait and then still never submit any items! I appreciate all of the work that the hostesses do!! Really!!

 

[ddavis860]

Maybe we have to give phone numbers along with addresses. My DH would answer a call, act totally clueless, and if I was hurt or something and not be able to finish, I think the hostess would get the general idea...

Update:

So I was talking to my DH and he isn't clueless He said he knows that this stuff is important to the other crazy scrapers that I talk to on the DIS

So, he promised to let any hostess that happens to call know if I am unable to finish my swap. I think I'll be including my phone number along with my address from now on...

 

[PrincessNancy96]

Update:

So I was talking to my DH and he isn't clueless He said he knows that this stuff is important to the other crazy scrapers that I talk to on the DIS

So, he promised to let any hostess that happens to call know if I am unable to finish my swap. I think I'll be including my phone number along with my address from now on...

I think Ddavis860 has a great solution.. I will start to utilize it with swaps I host... I will require a phone number & email address with mailing addy information.. This will allow me to give you a call or email you directly if there are issues.
**disclaimer: no numbers collected will be given out to 3rd parties for solicitation calls.. I would only call if we need information **

 

[Mickster]

I love that idea too! I think there should be a trade of phone numbers too. Swappers and hostesses. Some people might feel more comfortable calling a hostess to tell her of a problem than posting on the board for all to see.

 

[MazdaUK]

I know life gets in the way sometimes. But if someone is hosting a swap there is that much more on their shoulders, and if they can't cope with that then they should'nt take it on. Yeah, s**t happens. That's why I won't host a swap (apart form being in the UK where there are fewer scrappers to come in anyway). But having sent my stuff off extra early (to allow for the distance) and sent extra postage to cover the return leg, to get nothing really s***ks.

I'm just going to buy my stuff from now on - it honestly won't cost me any more than taking part in a swap where I get NOTHING back!

Bitter? Maybe. I think you would be in my shoes!