I think our marriage is the same although we have pooled finances. He earns more than I do (and, as Gumbo said, part of that is because I supported him as he advanced his career) and his job offers bonuses while mine does not. Normally we spend the bonus on something we decide together. However, several years ago, we spent it on something that *he* wanted and I don't really care about. (If I was making the decision alone, I wouldn't have even considered it.) However, he said "This is important to me, and if we use my bonus we can buy it without impacting the monthly budget or our savings. I'd really like to do it." I said OK and I'm totally fine with the decision. Likewise, if there was something I *really* wanted, I think he'd likely agree to spend it all on my choice, although i've never asked. However, if he had said "Well, it's *my* money, so I'm buying this no matter what you say," it would have been different. I won't say that he wasn't entitled make the decision. It is outside the normal budgeted money and it is from his job not mine, but if he handled it that way, it would make me feel neither respected nor admired.
, but I'll answer. I really doubt I would. Now, it's possible my parents would have talked me into it. I don't know, not having been in that situation, but I don't think I would have. Maybe that's being naïve, but again, 25 years later, so far so good.
