Leaving baby in room to nap? Thoughts and discussion!

[Wendy1985]

I'm not familiar with that incident, but it does seem as though you have taken a single incident and ascribed it to a culture. There are plenty of cases of child-neglect in the US but that doesn't mean it's a societal norm.

I stand corrected if I am wrong but I think the person is saying what is neglect here in the us might not be neglect here in the us

 

[MakiraMarlena]

In Iceland the parents will park a baby carriage outside with the baby in it, then go into a store and go shopping, leaving the baby outside. They might do that in Denmark too, but I saw it in Iceland. Doing the same in the USA would probably get you arrested.

As far as the McCann case from Portugal is concerned, it's not customary to do that in UK (parents were British) but the parents were at a restaurant within yards of the rooms and had some system where somebody from their group went to check on everyone's kids every half hour. I'm sure they thought it would be fine. The person who did the half hour check before Madeleine disappeared didn't actually go into the bedroom and didn't check to see if she was in bed. Just went in to see if everything was quiet. Her mother went in on the next half hour and found she was missing.

It goes to show how quickly an abduction could happen, since it's now widely accepted that Madeleine was abducted by someone from outside the family or the group of friends they were with. But they still park babies outside stores in Iceland.

 

[dcassetta]

All over the Nordic countries, people leave babies in strollers outside of shops and restaurants. Many parents also purposely have their babies spend time asleep outside even in the winter. My close friend has lived in Finland all of her adult life and this practice is common. My mom did it too when I was an infant. My parents lived in an apartment complex with other young military officers. She has a picture of all the prams lined up in the courtyard of the building all with a sleeping baby in them. She told me she, and the other moms, would leave a window open while they were cooking or doing housework in case one of the babies cried. These are not my photos, but give a sense of outside babies in Scandinavia -

 

[hrhdhd]

I'm not familiar with that incident, but it does seem as though you have taken a single incident and ascribed it to a culture. There are plenty of cases of child-neglect in the US but that doesn't mean it's a societal norm.

The woman from Denmark didn't perceive herself as neglecting her child, though--that's the cultural difference. And others in Denmark, hearing about her case (she was arrested, strip searched, baby taken, etc.), thought the police overreacted. (Heck, I think the police overreacted, and a jury agreed. She was awarded $66K.)

 

[Wendy1985]

So the USA seems to win the prize for Helicoptering parents because in the summer when I walk the outdoor mall and see a kid without a parent I scan the area and look for the parent and the parent smiles back at me

 

[KMack]

The family were British and it was all completely horrible. They had left her and other children together while they went to food practically under the room they were in. It isn't more acceptable in the UK at least. It was a very different time back then and definitely changed people's attitudes to what was and wasn't a thing to do. My parents definitely wouldn't have left us in a room while they went out on land or on a ship. I think people sometimes forget being on holiday doesn't mean bad things can't happen and this showed us that you have to be careful no matter what.

To all those referencing the Madeline McCann abduction: the parents went for dinner at a restaurant that was 55 m (180ft) as the crow flies from their groundfloor condo. It was almost twice that distance to walk to the condo. The doors to the condo could not be seen from the restaurant. The condo doors were not locked. The parents checked on the kid every 30 minutes.

Abductions aside, how much trouble/danger can small kids get themselves into over 30 minutes without supervision? Lots.

Bottom line: I totally understand how a new parent might ask this question. In fact, it suggests to me that the question was asked because the OP had concerns as well but wanted to do a signals check with the broader community to make sure she wasn’t being overprotective.

Too much can happen in a very short period of time. Some of these things can never be undone. It would never be worth it to me.