kids with autism

[kandb]

No. No one is expecting you to prevent all the meltdowns, but I do expect you to parent - remove the child, keep them from harming others, etc.

In the waiting room at one of autism centers Thursday an obviously severely autistic girl kept running over to my stroller and trying to pull my infant out. That should 100% NEVER happen. Ever. And it was strictly a lack of maintenance on the parents part.

Another set of caretakers did an amazing job making sure their adult ASD child only looked and didn't touch, but it was very obvious they were prepared to intervene if they felt he might do anything else.

No, I can't "control" my daughter making random robot noises when she's waiting in line for something, and I really don't think anyone cares about it. If they did, sure it's their problem. Kids make noise. If she's not hurting anyone and following the rules, deal with it. Yes, I do have a responsibility to stand between her and the other guests to keep her from getting into their face or hugging them. And that is NOT their problem and they shouldn't need to be understanding of that in any way. I can't expect people to deal with it when my kid decides to become dead weight on the floor in the middle of a line for 30 minutes until she's ready to get up. That's unreasonable.

The whole "it's their problem" line of thinking is fine for certain things but it becomes a real issue when it's used for everything our kids do that's different. We still have a responsibility to others, particularly when it comes to their personal space and safety.



Agree completely. I think nearly every parent I've ever seen or known totally gets things happen, kids cry, they're loud, etc. But there is still an expectation of responsibility, and even though it stinks sometimes, the responsibility of special needs parents is higher most of the time.

Of course parents needs to do everything to control their child. My point was with someone who is handicapped, sometimes the best attempt cannot work (and this is for typical children as well) and people sometimes have to give that parent a little slack. If any child is acting inappropriate, the parent should remove the child but like I said, give a parent like that some slack (maybe it may take a little longer). The only times I have seen parents not take action for their misbehaved children has been with typical children (usually in a restaurant, letting the child scream while others are trying to eat). Thankfully, "most" parents get it and do the right thing.

 

[aaarcher86]

Of course parents needs to do everything to control their child. My point was with someone who is handicapped, sometimes the best attempt cannot work (and this is for typical children as well) and people sometimes have to give that parent a little slack. If any child is acting inappropriate, the parent should remove the child but like I said, give a parent like that some slack (maybe it may take a little longer). The only times I have seen parents not take action for their misbehaved children has been with typical children (usually in a restaurant, letting the child scream while others are trying to eat). Thankfully, "most" parents get it and do the right thing.

I think most people are pretty tolerant, honestly. Especially if the parent is trying to do something.

Kids in restaurants = my nightmare