kids birthday parties - at what age did you stop having them?

[Dizneefamily+4]

As April draws near, it brings birthday party time again for us. My kids have April and May birthdays. I've had birthday parties of some sort for them every year since they each turned 1. And every year, I swear to myself that I'm going to stop throwing them a party every year. My parents always gave me a birthday party every year, so I come by this bad habit honestly!

DS12's birthday is first - at the end of April. He'll be turning 13. As he's gotten older, his parties have become smaller and less "planned." Last year, we invited a few of his friends to play laser tag (at a facility) and have pizza. Pretty casual. DD8 will be turning 9 at the end of May. For her party last year, her request was to have her friends over to play soccer and have cake. Again, pretty casual.

So, here we are again. And here's me, thinking up small party ideas for DS. I'm actually thinking about combining their parties into 1 - they each invite a few friends (like 2 or 3 each) and we'd take them to the indoor water park near us for a few hours. I'm truly thinking that this will definitely be the last year for DS to have an actual party, now that he'll be 13. In the future, maybe he can have a friend sleep over or something, but no official "party."

I know that a lot of people only give bday parties every other year or every few years. I'm just curious as to what age you stopped giving official parties at all?

 

[maslex]

I have two boys (17 & 18).

I would throw them a birthday party every year growing up. We would mostly invite family and as they got into school they would also invite a few friends from school.

My oldest's birthday is in August, so naturally it was usually a BBQ/pool party at our house. We stopped at his 18th birthday.

My youngest's birthday is in March. We did have a few parties in the house but also did a few parties outside of the home (McDonald's, bowling, lazer tag, mini golf, etc) For his 14th birthday he just wanted us (him, parents, brother) to go out to eat (he chose Red Robin ) and then he wanted to spend the afternoon at Cabela's. But hey, it's his birthday. From then on, we haven't had a traditional birthday for him. It's really been us going out to his choice of restaurant. I will however, have one for his 18th next year. After their 18th, it'll just be a night of dinner and gift.

 

[disykat]

We stopped "parties" at 10 for our kids. After that, they could have a friend (or a couple of friends) come over for cake or out for a special outing with us.

We noticed party invitations dwindled drastically after about 4th or 5th grade so we weren't the only ones!

 

[MIGrandma]

We stopped "parties" at 10 for our kids. After that, they could have a friend (or a couple of friends) come over for cake or out for a special outing with us.

We noticed party invitations dwindled drastically after about 4th or 5th grade so we weren't the only ones!

This is what our DD and her DH are planning for their kids. They have always had family birthday parties for their DS and DD (January and February birthdays) and both sides of the family go for snacks, cake and ice cream, to watch the birthday child open their gifts, and some chatting with everyone.

When our DS and DD were growing up we had family parties for them until after their 5th birthday. Once they were in school we let them decide what kind of birthday celebration they wanted.

 

[Poohforyou]

I imagine when dd14 goes off to college. Her birthday is late August before school starts so we've never done a whole class party. Until this past one they've been about 6-8 friends. Her 14th was 14 friends for food, music and a movie in our church hall. They had a blast being silly and stuffing themselves.

 

[momz]

DD turns 13 this week. We have had everything from themed parties at home, whole class parties at a venue, sleepovers with a few friends...whatever. But, this year, I told her she is too old to have a big to-do.

I have noticed that her friends no longer have "parties". So, this year I gave her a choice. We can take her out to dinner at her choice of restaurant, or I will take her and up to 3 friends to a movie (matinee), I will drop them off and pick them up, so they won't have mom sitting with them (A first for her group of friends).

I don't yet know what she will choose.

Currently, she is a bit peeved. She told me a couple months ago that she thinks it's not "fair" that her birthday falls during spring break every year, so she never has her birthday acknowledged at school. She said she wanted to be "queen for a day" on her birthday.

Hmmm...I'm thinking...high maintainence. Unfortunately, I will be at work on her birthday. So, I will crown her "queen" the day before instead. Not sure how I can make her feel special without over-doing it.

 

[Wendy31]

For DD & older DS, we did big, themed parties from ages 1-9. Some of the parties were at our home, some were at our inlaws' home w/ a pool, & some were at a separate venue. However, they were all "big" parties w/ themed food, decorations, treat bags, activities, etc.

At age 10, we did a "destination" birthday w/ just our immediate family. We took DD to the American Girl Café in Atlanta, & we took DS to an Atlanta Braves baseball game.

For her 11th birthday, my mom & I took DD for a "girls day out" - we shopped & had lunch. For his 11th birthday, DH took older DS for a "guys day out" - they went video-game shopping & had lunch.

For DD's 12th birthday, we invited all the girls in our 2 families to join us at The Melting Pot for a "Desserts for Diva" party. For older DS's 12th birthday, he & some of the other guys in our 2 families went to the movies.

For DD's 13th birthday, we had a big party w/ a sleepover again - she was turning into a teenager, after all!

For DD's 14th birthday, DD & some friends & female cousins went to see "Frozen" along w/ me & her two grandmothers & 1 aunt.

Older DS is turning 13 this July, & we're planning a big party.

And then, the next big party will be for their 16th birthdays & probably the last will be for their 18th birthdays.

Both of our families are local & are always involved w/ the parties. Additionally, there are a lot of cousins on both sides.

On the years that we don't have big parties, we still invite their grandparents to lunch or dinner to help us celebrate w/ presents & birthday cake.

We try to treat them equally & do the same sort of thing for each birthday. So basically, in summary, this is what we've done -

Ages 1-9: Themed Parties
Age 10: Destination
Age 11: Shopping & Lunch "Excursion" w/ me or DH
Age 12: Something w/ the girls in the family or w/ the guys in the family (restaurant, movies, etc.)
Age 13: Themed Party
Age 14: Something w/ friends & the girls in the family or w/ friends & the guys in the family
Age 15: ???
Age 16: Themed Party
Age 17: ???
Age 18: Themed Party

Younger DS is just 4, so he's still in the ages 1-9 category! So far, for him, we've had a "Jungle Animals" Party for his 1st birthday at our house, a "Toy Story" party for his 2nd birthday at my inlaws' house (w/ a pool), a "Go, Diego, Go" Party for his 3rd birthday at our local zoo, & a "Dinosaur" Party for his 4th birthday at our local children's museum.

Both his & older DS's birthdays are in July & are one week apart. I think we're going to combine his 5th birthday & older DS's 13th birthday at our local community pool, but we're going to let them choose their own theme & have 2 cakes. I hate to combine their parties, but I just think it makes easier for family. So my plan is to decorate one side of the party room w/ one theme & the other side w/ the other theme & have a cake table & a present table on each side w/ a main food table in the middle. And we'll have cake & presents for younger DS at the beginning of the party & cake & presents for older DS at the end of the party.

 

[HappyTogether]

My child who will be 11 this year is not getting presents or a party. We are flying to Seattle to go watch a Sounders soccer game with pre-match field passes.

We have been telling her we are going to go watch them throw fish.

 

[DisneyDreamer2504]

I have no kids, but growing up I only had a few actual parties, the last being when I was 9 or 10. It was more likely to be 2 or three friends for pizza and movies, or mini-golf or something like that, which I wouldn't consider a party. Once I got into middle and high school, bc I had a winter birthday and was involved in sports, it became even harder to do much.

 

[DeaverTex]

As best I can remember, we never did a birthday party for Tex Jr. other than the three of us going somewhere for dinner, and he got a cake and presents of course. Maybe Mrs. Tex and I are old fashioned. (Or just fuddie-duddies.)

Looking at other people we know, who have kids, it seems that 10 to 12 is when the kid parties tend to wind down.