Kids and Drag Queens

[Eeyores Butterfly]

Had a situation today when a kid in the class I am interning in (4th grade) asked in front of the class what a drag queen was. My mentor teacher was going to talk to her about it later instead of trying to explain in front of the entire class.

My question to you as parents is: How would you prefer a teacher to handle that type of situation if your child(ren) was(were) involved? I think she was just going to say something along the lines of, "Sometimes boys dress like girls or girls dress like boys for fun". My professor said you could even say something along the lines of 'like Halloween'. I never in a million years would have thought a child would ask this, so I'm not sure what I would have said. For some parents this is a very sensitive subject, so I'm wondering how people here would have wanted it handled.

 

[singingpixie]

I'm assuming pretending you didn't hear the question wouldn't be an option?

That's a hard one. Personally, I would have no problem explaining that one to my kids... or having someone else explain it as long as it was in a tolerant way. Some of my more conservative friends would probably rather you tell her that that's a question she should ask her parents. That's probably the safer option.

What's funny is I honestly can't remember when I learned what a drag queen was. It was probably when I was home sick from school (maybe 8 or 9 was the first time I'd stay by myself) and watching Rupaul on Jenny Jones or something.

 

[Mrs.Toad]

I think the answer you quoted is fine. Honestly, it wouldn't matter that much to me, as long as the answer didn't make any moral judgements about it.

I'd be fine with a teacher telling the kids to ask their parents about that one, too.

 

[nannerbadnanner]

I would tell him that this is a question that he needs to ask his parents and then move on.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

That is a discussion for your parents.

 

[singingpixie]

I do have to say though that that's one of the better thread titles I've read in a while!

 

[Soarin08]

I'd leave it at something that a parent should tell their children about.

 

[Tigger Woods]

Agreed. Leave it to the parents ..

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

She knows this particular family and she knows that the mom won't have an issue with that explanation.

I thought about if it was me feigning ignorance and say ask your mom and dad. The one problem I foresee with that is that if they get any inkling it's a "bad thing" or "not school appropriate" that they get very curious, ask all of their friends, and get very bad information that may not be appropriate. I remember doing that when we watched "A Christmas Story" at my after school program. I asked around until I found somebody who knew what he said instead of "fudge" because no adult would answer my question. I also got some very, um, colorful explanations as to what it was. Thankfully, I don't think the other kids in the class even picked up on it.

 

[daisax]

"That's a good question to ask at home tonight!"

That's the one my roommate the teacher called upon when a first grader looked up at her and asked "Is Jesus God?" (Public school)

 

[mamacatnv]

A drag queen is a person, usually a man, who dresses (or "drags") in female clothes and make-up for special occasions and usually because they are performing and entertaining as a hostess, stage artist or at an event.Wikipedia

IMO there is nothing sensitive about this - some men do it for entertainment etc. A drag queen is not the same as a Transgendered person or even someone who cross dresses.

I agree that making it seem taboo or wrong furthers the curiosity in children.

Now, if a 4th grader asked what a transgendered person was - that could get complicated but no more so than if a 4th grader asked what being gay was.

A drag queen........not an identity issue, an occupation (I know, I know a lot more can be said, but this is the simple and honest explanation imo)

 

[singingpixie]

A drag queen is a person, usually a man, who dresses (or "drags") in female clothes and make-up for special occasions and usually because they are performing and entertaining as a hostess, stage artist or at an event.Wikipedia

IMO there is nothing sensitive about this - some men do it for entertainment etc. A drag queen is not the same as a Transgendered person or even someone who cross dresses.

I agree that making it seem taboo or wrong furthers the curiosity in children.

Now, if a 4th grader asked what a transgendered person was - that could get complicated but no more so than if a 4th grader asked what being gay was.

A drag queen........not an identity issue, an occupation (I know, I know a lot more can be said, but this is the simple and honest explanation imo)

I agree with you and would be fine with that definition being explained to my child, by myself or a teacher or whomever. I just don't think everyone would be. Unfortunately, most of the time teachers (especially of younger kids, not necessarily high school) would be smart to stick to the least common denominator as far as issues that have even a chance of being considered "sensitive."

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

My DS knew what a drag queen was by the time he was in 4th grade, so I wouldn't have had that problem!
But I do think that is a question that many parents would want you to punt back to them.

 

[java]

I would go with the others that said This is a question for your parents.
Only because the answer you give is going to open up a whole bunch of other ?'s and if you give the answer in front of other students you may have those parents asking why you are talking about Drag queens in school.

My 5 year old knows what a transgender person is. He knows it as a Girl that was born in a boys body- or a boy that was born in a girls body. So they have to fix it.

 

[Lib E]

The question wasn't about transsexualism. Sex doesn't even need to be addressed. The term drag queen is used to describe a man who dresses up in costume to look like a woman. Some do it to perform on stage, others do it for fun. That's all that needs to be said.

 

[RadioNate]

The question wasn't about transsexualism. Sex doesn't even need to be addressed. The term drag queen is used to describe a man who dresses up in costume to look like a woman. Some do it to perform on stage, others do it for fun. That's all that needs to be said.

I agree and as a parent, I wouldn't have a problem with a teacher giving this explanation to my child.

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

It's interesting seeing the different takes on this! My teacher and I were talking about it, and we both made the comment that we aren't sure when we learned what it is.

I think I should explain the area a little bit. This is a rural area with some pretty conservative values, despite being a university town. When we were talking about something else she asked the kids (4th graders) how many go deer hunting and I think either every single one, or all but one, raised their hands.

We talked about how even 10 years ago it wouldn't be a big deal, but this day in age everything has become so sexualized, and people are so uptight about anything that is non conformist in terms of gender. It helps that she knows the mom and knew that the mom would be okay with any explanation she gave. It did throw us for quite a loop, but she hid it well.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I would say that it is a slang term used for boys who dress as girls.

 

[kristilew]

When I get out-of-the-blue questions from my kid or others, I've learned to respond first with "Why do you ask?"

Knowing the context of them thinking about that can really help shape an answer.

If you stick with teaching, you will be shocked at what kids that age will talk about! Good luck and bless you for taking on combat duty!

 

[BillSears]

Just tell them to go home and look it up on the internet.

Actually I'd be fine with anyone telling my daughter at that age what a Drag Queen is. On the other hand she had been exposed to cross dressers at an early age and already knew about them by the time she was 4 or so.