Jury Duty is not family-friendly!

[brockash]

Yet, there ARE places with childcare in place for serving on the jury to ease the burden & others are saying that's not good enough. So, that leaves you back at square one doesn't it?

And as someone else pointed out, if you get thrown in jail for contempt of court, you are going to have BIGGER childcare issues than jury duty, plus a whole host of other issues to go along with it (I'm assuming some sort of fine too which then adds to the financial burden).

I don't think jury duty is *ever* easy for anyone but it's part of living in the United States. There is always something better that someone can think they have to do (vacation, wedding, work, childcare, weather (hey in the winter, a blizzard is possible), I don't like the idea of having to drive in it for jury duty!), for that matter lack of a driver's license to GET to the courthouse -- I could come up with a billion excuses).

At least here, we get a notice months in advance asking you "when is the best time for you to serve" and you get to choose the month and you fill it out with all pertinent information such as if you have been convicted of a felony yourself, know anyone who has been, etc...

Here's a question for you all with the childcare -- what would you do if you had a 1 month old baby & you were subpoenad to testify in a court case? You don't really get the option of NOT going & then you don't get called to the stand that day but have to go back the next day & do it all over again. This happened to me in real life, I would have had to FIND somehow, someway childcare & BOTH DH & I were there to testify, so couldn't even leave the baby home with DH. Sometimes in life you just have to do what you have to do because it's required of you.

ITA. Not everything you do in life is fun or easy. Like you said, sometimes you just have to do what you have to do. I seem to remember my parents explaining that to me a long time ago

 

[DVCLiz]

God love the DIS! Always predictable...

I'm sure there are plenty of times someone has moved and hasn't found a place in the community with quality childcare, or hasn't met the neighbors down the street with a teenage daughter who babysits, etc. That's a different scenario.

The people I am referring to are the ones who almost defiantly set up the expectation that they and they alone will be the only people trusted to care for their children. They make no effort to find any alternatives because - as you have already seen on this thread - the only alternative they can visualize is that strangers are ripping newborn infants from the arms of their loving mothers. They don't seem to be able to understand that there is a midway point and that you can love your children and still find a friend, a neighbor, or a good childcare situation for times you might need it.

As I said, my personal opinion is that I find it bizarre that a parent would set up this dynamic by choice, but obviously many do and think it best for their family.

 

[LisaR]

Actually, it is easy for some people to do jury duty. My parents are both retired and are at 60 and 65 years young, very capable of serving jury duty. My mom has NEVER been called, why? There should be a better system in place. Why are some people never called and some people called as soon as their time is up? There should be some way to sign up for it voluntarily. I'd do it now. But when I was called, I had just moved to that state, dh was working a new job, so no vacation time, I didn't know anyone yet, no family within 1200 miles, I was a SAHM AND dh's boss was called the same week I was, so he couldn't cover for my dh! I also called local daycare places to ask about temporary child care and I was LAUGHED at! I could so do it now and gladly would, why can't I sign up for it?

I am sure your parents are very capable but just because someone is retired, doesn't make them capable. When my Mom retired, it was to be a care giver to my very ill father.

Jurors are chosen randomly by a computer. They don't have anyway of determining if someone is retired and capable, retired and senile, a SAHM, a small business owner, access to a sitter, etc. It is random for a reason. If I am ever on trial, I don't want my jury to be made up of all 60 - 65 year old retired people.

On thing I have learned after serving many, many times is that you really do catch more flies with honey. I have seen people walk in the court room with a major attitude from the get-go. Their life is more important than anyone else or their circumstances are harder than anyone else. They express this to the judge in ways that come across as argumentative. Every single time, the judge makes that person stay the entire time until the jury is selected even though there isn't a snowballs chance that they will serve on the jury. On the other hand, when people have presented their case in a calm way, assuming their situation is truly unique, I have watch the judge dismiss them.

 

[justhat]

The kids here don't get home from school until fairly late. Many days we have less than an hour to eat and do homework before activities start. Some activities run until 7 or 8 at night. It is very common here. Very few kids have nothing to do after school. Even if you aren't in any activities by the time you do homework etc. you have at best an hour for a playdate before it is dinner time.

Let me just clarify, we're talking about very young kids? What ages? Schools here are out by 3:30pm, my kindergartener gets out at 2:45. None of my 5yo's activities go till 7 or 8pm. Swimming was the latest which started at 5:30 and was 30 minutes. Any this is an everyday occurrence for kids this age? I think my daughter would be exhausted if she were nonstop between school, activities, and homework (which she does not get) from 8am-8pm M-F.


But my point with the playdate was to help out a parent needing childcare for a day. I wouldnt have chosen baseball day as a playdate for my daughter and my friend's son. In fact, our kids aren't even in the same classes (he's in 1st grade) and though they are friendly and play well while we're together, they have never had specific playdates with each other. Their younger siblings are really the ones who are good friends so the older ones sort of come along as forced. But to help out a mom needing care the [short] playdate pre-activity worked out fine.

 

[justhat]

God love the DIS! Always predictable...

I'm sure there are plenty of times someone has moved and hasn't found a place in the community with quality childcare, or hasn't met the neighbors down the street with a teenage daughter who babysits, etc. That's a different scenario.

The people I am referring to are the ones who almost defiantly set up the expectation that they and they alone will be the only people trusted to care for their children. They make no effort to find any alternatives because - as you have already seen on this thread - the only alternative they can visualize is that strangers are ripping newborn infants from the arms of their loving mothers. They don't seem to be able to understand that there is a midway point and that you can love your children and still find a friend, a neighbor, or a good childcare situation for times you might need it.

As I said, my personal opinion is that I find it bizarre that a parent would set up this dynamic by choice, but obviously many do and think it best for their family.

What is crazy is that some people are saying they wouldn't even use the free childcare provided, yet complain that they have no one to watch their kids. And no one seems to have replied to my statement that you could go to the free daycare in advance and meet the staff, check references, talk to parents, etc. That would solve the 'stranger' issue and you'd be able to serve without a hardship.

 

[jrmasm]

I think jury duty is far easier on my single working professional friends. They all seem to love going. One childless married went a week or 2 ago for 2 days and sad that he didn't make a jury.

Then the burden is on the employer.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Let me just clarify, we're talking about very young kids? What ages? Schools here are out by 3:30pm, my kindergartener gets out at 2:45. None of my 5yo's activities go till 7 or 8pm. Swimming was the latest which started at 5:30 and was 30 minutes. Any this is an everyday occurrence for kids this age? I think my daughter would be exhausted if she were nonstop between school, activities, and homework (which she does not get) from 8am-8pm M-F.


But my point with the playdate was to help out a parent needing childcare for a day. I wouldnt have chosen baseball day as a playdate for my daughter and my friend's son. In fact, our kids aren't even in the same classes (he's in 1st grade) and though they are friendly and play well while we're together, they have never had specific playdates with each other. Their younger siblings are really the ones who are good friends so the older ones sort of come along as forced. But to help out a mom needing care the [short] playdate pre-activity worked out fine.

Yep, I am talking about young kids. Kindergarten here lets out later than where you are. Now of course my really young kids don't have nighttime actvities but some do. We are always busy because we have 4 children who all have activities. The kids get to relax which is why there are no playdates on school days. As an example, if your child is in baseball/t-ball that is at least 2 nights a week until at least 7pm. If your child has religion class that is another hour a week. It is very easy for a simple activity to take up a lot of time. Some sports take up 4 days a week.
Let me just say that if my kids hated it I would pull the plug. I have no desire to take whiny kids anywhere and they know it. They love what they do. I do put the brakes on and tell them no to certain activities because we simply do not have the time. I try to let them try what they like but education is most important as well as their health. So while they are busy, they genuinely enjoy it and they get to see their friends at these activities where if they didn't have anything to do they probably wouldn't see anyone because most kids have something to do here.

 

[Becky2005]

If I were in your situation, my mom would have flown down to watch the 1 month old. I assume you knew the date a week or 2 in advance. I'd have her stay a week or so to cover any additional days I may need to be available.

I have served in Illinois (3x - always dismissed once I interview) and only once did I get a best time to serve questionnaire. At that time I was going to college in Iowa so I listed a time I'd be home and was reassigned that time.

Unfortunately, no warning! We knew the trial was starting & had a visit in the attorney's office. We knew DH would be called to the stand, I had no clue I was going to be called until he handed me the piece of paper with it. Talk about scrambling! I would take the jury duty notification any day over the scrambling we had to do. I really wouldn't wish that upon anyone & certainly changed my perspective on the way trials are done. I only knew the TV versions. I'm thinking we were in the office on Monday night & had to be at the courthouse Tuesday. It might have been a 2 day notice but it was *very* short notice. Jury duty notices, at least the ones we have recieved are never 1 or 2 day notices.

I'm trying to remember the last one DH got (he was supposed to go last week but his number wasn't called to even go to the courthouse) and if it asked when was a good time. I think he must have filled out a prior one stating when. I know I did for the last one & even though I gave a good month to go, timing wasn't great when the notice showed up but I made it work. I was out of there by 11 AM -- they do provide a free lunch here because they told all of us that were dismissed to make sure we pick up our lunches. So, no daycare but they will feed you.

I know when my dad did the Federal one, he was asked if he could do it before they actually assigned him that. He could. It was 1 day/week for a few weeks. It wasn't full weeks at a time.

It seems as if we get 3 - 6 months notice. A first notice to tell you your number is picked & fill out the basic information & if you have a preferred month. Then another notice about a few weeks before you need to go. Maybe it's just our county that works this way.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

What is crazy is that some people are saying they wouldn't even use the free childcare provided, yet complain that they have no one to watch their kids. And no one seems to have replied to my statement that you could go to the free daycare in advance and meet the staff, check references, talk to parents, etc. That would solve the 'stranger' issue and you'd be able to serve without a hardship.

I will respond. That does seem like it would be a good idea. Here they don't provide anything. I have been called every time I had a child. Within one month of giving birth I would get a summons. Yeah, I am sure I am all about being a juror right after giving birth. It is not some random system because if it was my name should bounce out since I have been called so many times. My Dh has only been called I think once. It is ridiculous.

 

[ZachnElli]

I am sure your parents are very capable but just because someone is retired, doesn't make them capable. When my Mom retired, it was to be a care giver to my very ill father.

Jurors are chosen randomly by a computer. They don't have anyway of determining if someone is retired and capable, retired and senile, a SAHM, a small business owner, access to a sitter, etc. It is random for a reason. If I am ever on trial, I don't want my jury to be made up of all 60 - 65 year old retired people.
On thing I have learned after serving many, many times is that you really do catch more flies with honey. I have seen people walk in the court room with a major attitude from the get-go. Their life is more important than anyone else or their circumstances are harder than anyone else. They express this to the judge in ways that come across as argumentative. Every single time, the judge makes that person stay the entire time until the jury is selected even though there isn't a snowballs chance that they will serve on the jury. On the other hand, when people have presented their case in a calm way, assuming their situation is truly unique, I have watch the judge dismiss them.

I never said that all the jurors should be retired, I was just giving an example of it being easy for some people. I also said I'd do it now and I'm 30 something, I guess you didn't read where I said I'd sign up now twice. I love it when posters take one sentence and reply like that was all that was said. I still don't see how it's a jury of peers when some people have never been called, like my mom 60 years and never called and she would LOVE to do it.

 

[jrmasm]

What is crazy is that some people are saying they wouldn't even use the free childcare provided, yet complain that they have no one to watch their kids. And no one seems to have replied to my statement that you could go to the free daycare in advance and meet the staff, check references, talk to parents, etc. That would solve the 'stranger' issue and you'd be able to serve without a hardship.

There is no pleasing some people.

 

[ZachnElli]

What is crazy is that some people are saying they wouldn't even use the free childcare provided, yet complain that they have no one to watch their kids. And no one seems to have replied to my statement that you could go to the free daycare in advance and meet the staff, check references, talk to parents, etc. That would solve the 'stranger' issue and you'd be able to serve without a hardship.

I would have used the childcare had that been an option.

 

[DVCLiz]

What is crazy is that some people are saying they wouldn't even use the free childcare provided, yet complain that they have no one to watch their kids. And no one seems to have replied to my statement that you could go to the free daycare in advance and meet the staff, check references, talk to parents, etc. That would solve the 'stranger' issue and you'd be able to serve without a hardship.

That's really my point. If you know in advance you can almost always set up some sort of childcare and have time to meet the person, check references, have them over for a few "mom at home" type of practice visits, etc. I would want that in place for any number of situations, not just jury duty.

And yet for a lot of moms it seems to be a foreign or at the very least a distasteful idea.

Also, if it were that much of a stretch financially to arrange a few days of childcare I'd be making some lifestyle decisions, but that's just me and that really IS another thread...

 

[justhat]

I will respond. That does seem like it would be a good idea. Here they don't provide anything. I have been called every time I had a child. Within one month of giving birth I would get a summons. Yeah, I am sure I am all about being a juror right after giving birth. It is not some random system because if it was my name should bounce out since I have been called so many times. My Dh has only been called I think once. It is ridiculous.

Well here you would have to have a 2yo to qualify for the daycare anyway. Under 2yo and you can be exempt since they don't provide care for that age group. I still went but that was my own choice.


I have to say I think it is crazy for 5yos to have activities till 7-8pm each night. How do they get enough sleep? Baseball for 5-6yos here is one hour long practice and one game each week (also roughly an hour). Our coach this fall, however, combined practice and games so the commitment is only 1 day each week. The game is either at 5:30 with practice before or at 4:15 with practice after. Either way we're done by 6:30pm, but because that is even considered late for that age, all games are Friday nights so there is no worry about school the next day.

I have heard of sports taking up multiple days a week (my daughter swims twice a week, but had she opted for the team it would have been 3 days a week), but each session is only 45 minutes-1 hour at this age (or level as the case may be, as my daughter is the only 5yo in her swim class, the rest of the kids are 8+). And really, for most 5yos, nothing is more than twice a week here. And that is usually soccer, baseball, etc where there is a practice and a game.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

That's really my point. If you know in advance you can almost always set up some sort of childcare and have time to meet the person, check references, have them over for a few "mom at home" type of practice visits, etc. I would want that in place for any number of situations, not just jury duty.

And yet for a lot of moms it seems to be a foreign or at the very least a distasteful idea.

Also, if it were that much of a stretch financially to arrange a few days of childcare I'd be making some lifestyle decisions, but that's just me and that really IS another thread...[/QUOTE]

Okay, I'll bite. Could we afford childcare for 4 children for a few days? Yes. Do I want to spend that kind of money just to sit in court? No.
There are plenty of people who are very financially responsible who are going through rough times right now due to job loss.

 

[Becky2005]

I It is not some random system because if it was my name should bounce out since I have been called so many times. My Dh has only been called I think once. It is ridiculous.

I heard, don't know if it's true or not though, they will know that this week they have 10 trials on the docket, 1 for a 30 year old mom, 1 for a 20 year old male, 1 for a 50 year old female, 1 for a 50 year old male, etc...

So...they pull all the jurors that would fit those people's peers to try and get as many people on the jury that they can & of course many more than they *truly* need.

Just what I heard. I thought it was just computer generated but I suppose it could be both. They input what trials are coming up & the computer randomly generates matches -- 50 numbers of 20 - 30 year old age range females; 50 numbers of 45 - 55 year old males, etc...

Who knows if it's true but it seems logical so that you wouldn't get a jury of all 60 year olds for an 18 - 20 year old defendant or flip it around a jury of all 18 - 20 year olds for a 60 year old defendant.

 

[FireDancer]

Well, this thread has gotten way off track...and for once it wasn't any of my posts that did it.

Here is how I look at it. Jury duty will inconvenience almost everyone that gets called. While some people are in situations where no problem would be caused what so ever most of us do not fit that description. For some it is a burden of time. I would have to get a lot of work done in the evening from home, so I fit this description. For others, like parents who don't have any free childcare alternative, small business owners, commission sales people that can only call on customers at certain times, and many others I can't think of now, it will be a financial burden.

It is the system we have. I don't want the burden of jury duty any more than anyone else. The burden suffered by one person is no more or less real to that suffered by anyone else (well, other than those that don't see any burden). In a civil society, however, there are burdens we have to suffer for that civil society to continue. One of those burdens is jury duty. I would rather suffer that burden that give up the liberty that comes with the citizen juror.

 

[DVCLiz]

That's really my point. If you know in advance you can almost always set up some sort of childcare and have time to meet the person, check references, have them over for a few "mom at home" type of practice visits, etc. I would want that in place for any number of situations, not just jury duty.

And yet for a lot of moms it seems to be a foreign or at the very least a distasteful idea.

Also, if it were that much of a stretch financially to arrange a few days of childcare I'd be making some lifestyle decisions, but that's just me and that really IS another thread...[/QUOTE]

Okay, I'll bite. Could we afford childcare for 4 children for a few days? Yes. Do I want to spend that kind of money just to sit in court? No.
There are plenty of people who are very financially responsible who are going through rough times right now due to job loss.

Nobody said you had to WANT to spend money on childcare in order to be on the jury. But to be so tight that you couldn't do it if you had to is not a place I would want my family to be in. Period.

And this thread is not about how the economy has affected your family's finances.

 

[MushyMushy]

God love the DIS! Always predictable...

I'm sure there are plenty of times someone has moved and hasn't found a place in the community with quality childcare, or hasn't met the neighbors down the street with a teenage daughter who babysits, etc. That's a different scenario.

The people I am referring to are the ones who almost defiantly set up the expectation that they and they alone will be the only people trusted to care for their children. They make no effort to find any alternatives because - as you have already seen on this thread - the only alternative they can visualize is that strangers are ripping newborn infants from the arms of their loving mothers. They don't seem to be able to understand that there is a midway point and that you can love your children and still find a friend, a neighbor, or a good childcare situation for times you might need it.

As I said, my personal opinion is that I find it bizarre that a parent would set up this dynamic by choice, but obviously many do and think it best for their family.

Ah there you go talking common sense and all. Shame on you!

 

[Chicago526]

God love the DIS! Always predictable...

I'm sure there are plenty of times someone has moved and hasn't found a place in the community with quality childcare, or hasn't met the neighbors down the street with a teenage daughter who babysits, etc. That's a different scenario.

The people I am referring to are the ones who almost defiantly set up the expectation that they and they alone will be the only people trusted to care for their children. They make no effort to find any alternatives because - as you have already seen on this thread - the only alternative they can visualize is that strangers are ripping newborn infants from the arms of their loving mothers. They don't seem to be able to understand that there is a midway point and that you can love your children and still find a friend, a neighbor, or a good childcare situation for times you might need it.

As I said, my personal opinion is that I find it bizarre that a parent would set up this dynamic by choice, but obviously many do and think it best for their family.

MTE. There are always understandable exceptions, but by and large I think it's a responsibility of parenthood to make sure you have short, medium, and long term childcare solutions in place for any reason, not just jury duty. Life is unpredictable and you just never know when you'll need trusted, safe childcare for your little ones, and it's much easier to have something in place ahead of time rather than scramble with only a few week's notice (or days or even hours, if a true emergency crops up).

"I would never leave my child with a stranger"....okay that's fine, but in that case you need scope out babysitters, daycares, neighbors, etc. ahead of time so that they AREN'T strangers when/if something comes up. You can't assume that you or your spouse will always be available. You should have a back up if you rely on family to watch your child, as they might not always be available on short notice.

Even if you don't normally need a sitter, interview a few and have them "on file" for backup. Check in with them on a regular basis to make sure they still provide child care servies (don't interview them and never use them, then call them 5 years later and expect them to run to your aide). Use them now and again so the kids are familur with them and the sitter knows your home's routine (and so that you become a loyal customer of the sitter).

As for jury duty...yes child care cost is an issue, if your only solution is a sitter and not a friend/family member that can help you out for free. I totally sympathise and feel that needs to change, jury duty should at least pay minimum wage if nothing else, to help off set some of the costs. I think my county pays something like $13 a day. My company pays my full wages while I'm on duty (I'm SO lucky!) and they don't even ask for the check to be signed over to them, it's worth so little that it would cost them more to process it than it's worth! Jury duty is always going to be a burden, but I don't think it should risk financial ruin of some of it's citizens, either.