May I please scream?


So I have mentioned before that my elderly mom, who has Alzheimer's, lives with me and I take care of her. Also mentioned that I am looking for someone to stay here and care for her while we are gone on this trip (that isn't going so well, since she dislikes everyone I have her meet, but that is not why I scream now).
My mom also has arthritis, and her knees have been bothering her. 5 years ago, she had a hip replacement. Since this is a meet thread, I won't bore you with the ugly details (so this may be a disjointed and nonsensical post, sorry), but I will just say that she has always needed to be the center of attention in her children's lives, and has never liked it when I take a trip with my family.
She has finally, after years of of being told to do this, agreed to a knee replacement. What prompted her to agree now? Well, the dr. won't be able to do the surgery until end of June, then she will be in hospital for 4 days, then to a rehab facility for 3 weeks. As soon as he said "end of June", and I asked if there were any other weeks as I was supposed to be going out of town, my mom told him to schedule it.

She figures I can reschedule for a few weeks later.
I am beside myself with anger! We have
trip insurance, but it won't cover this because it is a pre-existing condition. I have to be here for her when she has surgery, because I have legal guardianship and power of everything (she was declared legally and mentally incompetent last August). I have two brothers in Hungary, but they won't come. I have a brother in Atlanta, but he is an idiot and just makes things worse.
We are supposed to go back to the dr. end of April to sign papers and get a confirmed surgery date. I am praying furiously that a day that works better with my schedule is available. Yes, I know that is awfully selfish of me, and I don't wish for her to suffer anymore, but I need this vacation! And I don't want my daughters to feel negatively towards my mom, either, because this vacation that they have been looking forward to for years is cancelled.
I suppose, if worse comes to worse, I send my husband with the girls and fish extender stuff and I stay home to care for my mom. At least there is that.
Until the end of April, however, I am going to keep planning my trip and assume that I am going. I have fish exchange gifts to put together, shopping to do, etc., etc. I will continue to "talk" to all of you because nothing is set in stone yet, and with all the praying I am going to do, I figure God has to make it all work out, right? Even if I am being selfish.
Ok, back to the fun. If someone wants to come and drown me in Mojito or Mudslide, I am good with that. The front door is open!
