Jon and Kate non bash post

[PrincessSuzanne]

I posted this on the other thread...but maybe the non-bashers will see where I was coming from.....


Not to defend Kate's decision to keep filming, I agree it's time to wrap it up & cancel the show....
But it's probably good for the kids to keep doing it...just for a short bit. (Flame suit on) They've had these cameras around their whole lives, filming is normal for them. To continue for a few episodes would give them some sense of stability; in a strange way. Not, mom & dad are getting divorced & the cameras are gone all in one week. Now what?

Hopefully someone undestands the point I was trying to make......I started rambling.


I got divorced a few years ago & I truly believe it was the best for everyone involved. Maybe my kids will be permanently scarred for life , but they will have happy memories with both mom & dad (allbeit seperately). They won't remember back to their birthday party when mom & dad weren't even speaking to each other.

I get what you are saying and think that the kids probably do need the stability of doing the show at least temporarily. Thye are going to be traumatized enough by all the other issues going on and don't need all aspects of their lives turned upside down. The crew is like family to those kids at this point.

I don't get Kevin and Jody going on tv and spouting off as helpful at all. This is a time when these children need all the family they have.

My parents divorce was finalized a month after I turned a year old and I was probaly alot better off. I didn't know more than I needed to until I reached adulthood and my life was alot happier. My father wasn't in the picture (his choice) and didn't hurt me at all. Some children are better off when their parents divorce, and some people who have no experience with divorce just can't always see that. My cousin's oldest DD was traumatized for a while after her parents seperated, but she got past it and is much better off.

It also takes two willing participants to go to counseling. I still remember my ex telling me maybe I needed counseling, but he sure didn't when I wanted us to do counseling. Jon seems to have checked out already, which is sad. I hope he will not have his girlfriends around when he has the kids.

Marsha

Jon has appeared to be out for Jon from what I have seen. Jon does seem to have checked out and that is sad for his kids. He seems to be more of a friend when he is home with the children, instead of being a parent first. Why can't he get an apartment in the same town, that is completely irresponsible. He seems very immature and I do hope he has enough respect not to bring the girlfriend around the children, but who knows

Suzanne

 

[Buckeye Gal]

For those of you whose cable went out, TLC is doing an encore at 11:00 pm EDT tonight. I'm sure it will be repeated on another date as well.

 

[tigercat]

I'm sorry but I really feel that Jon has decided that he really doesn't want the responsibility of all that is required in a marriage with children. Even the way he talked tonight I just kept seeing a man who just wants to play. Well guess what...you have kids grow up. You are right though that 2 people need to go to couselling not one, and it is better to have 2 people divorce than stay together for the family especially when one has checked out. My il's lived together but he had checked out and was a jerk. She finally left after years of staying together for the kids. The kids were better off after they split up even though it did take time. The kids were older as well they were not young.
tigercat

 

[MosMom]

It is official, the name of the show is now Kate+Nine.

 

[Kycha]

I'm sorry but I really feel that Jon has decided that he really doesn't want the responsibility of all that is required in a marriage with children. Even the way he talked tonight I just kept seeing a man who just wants to play. Well guess what...you have kids grow up.
tigercat

I know. His comment "that he didn't know what the future held, but he was excited" really got me.

I hope it was Kate that filed the divorce papers today. Cut your losses with that loser and move on.

Sorry, I hope that isn't bashing.

 

[Starbrite]

I hope it was Kate that filed the divorce papers today. Cut your losses with that loser and move on.

Sorry, I hope that isn't bashing.

Yes, It was Kate. There was an official statement on the other thread.

 

[TanyaLovesPooh]

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20286839,00.html

Kate: "Over the course of this weekend, Jon's activities have left me no choice but to file legal procedures in order to protect myself and our children," Kate said in a statement Monday night. "While there are reasons why it was appropriate and necessary for me to initiate this proceeding, I do not wish to discuss those reasons at this time, in the hope that all issues will be resolved amicably between Jon and myself. As always, my first priority remains our children."

Jon: "This afternoon, Kate filed for divorce. Our kids are still my number one priority. I love them and want to make sure they stay happy, healthy and safe. My job is being the best, most supportive and loving father that I can be to my kids, and not being married to Kate doesn’t change that."

This will be a difficult transition for all of us ... but Kate and I will work out a schedule that enables our kids to have plenty of quality time with both of us at home in Pennsylvania. In terms of my marriage, it’s no secret that the past six months or so have been very difficult for Kate and me. We are no different than other couples and parents who are facing a crossroads in their marriage. I am of course deeply saddened that we are divorcing."

 

[alexandria674]

I'm sorry but I really feel that Jon has decided that he really doesn't want the responsibility of all that is required in a marriage with children. Even the way he talked tonight I just kept seeing a man who just wants to play. Well guess what...you have kids grow up. You are right though that 2 people need to go to couselling not one, and it is better to have 2 people divorce than stay together for the family especially when one has checked out. My il's lived together but he had checked out and was a jerk. She finally left after years of staying together for the kids. The kids were better off after they split up even though it did take time. The kids were older as well they were not young.
tigercat

I never really thought about it until now. But you know what? You are right. He seems so blase about things and it was Kate who I felt myself feeling bad for. I am just happy that the fights have stopped and the kids can movie on.

 

[DMRick]

I certainly understand what you are saying. And as I said on the other thread, so easy to say get out of the contract no matter the cost. But if the cost is more money than they have? If they need to give up both houses, and the kids very support is in danger, how can we just say do it no matter the cost. Very few people wouldn't look ahead to see if that is possible.

I posted this on the other thread...but maybe the non-bashers will see where I was coming from.....


Not to defend Kate's decision to keep filming, I agree it's time to wrap it up & cancel the show....
But it's probably good for the kids to keep doing it...just for a short bit. (Flame suit on) They've had these cameras around their whole lives, filming is normal for them. To continue for a few episodes would give them some sense of stability; in a strange way. Not, mom & dad are getting divorced & the cameras are gone all in one week. Now what?

Hopefully someone undestands the point I was trying to make......I started rambling.


I got divorced a few years ago & I truly believe it was the best for everyone involved. Maybe my kids will be permanently scarred for life , but they will have happy memories with both mom & dad (allbeit seperately). They won't remember back to their birthday party when mom & dad weren't even speaking to each other.

 

[disneychrista]

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20286839,00.html

Kate: "Over the course of this weekend, Jon's activities have left me no choice but to file legal procedures in order to protect myself and our children,"

I am curious as to what activities those are?

Obviously they choose to seperate prior to this weekend...

 

[Starbrite]

THIS is reality TV - good or bad. People wanted less cushy vacations, freebies & scripted episodes...well there you have it. THIS is how it happens in real life. Each one has their side of the story, You can choose a side if you wish. (general "you") If they continue shooting, I'll watch.

 

[Buckalew11]

So very sad. Certainly not what I was hoping for.

My heart went out to her. So, if she is pulling my leg being the victim, it worked well on me for sure. I personally think Kate knows she has watched all this happen and can't do a darn thing about it now. Too late Kate.
And Jon, well, he's checked out and excited about his new life...who can say any more?

 

[marivaid]

I feel so sad even though I don't really know these people Looking back at the first few seasons, they WERE in love. I don't know if the show ruined their marriage or if they would have ended up divorcing anyway (even though I like Kate, she's definitely hard to live with).

What happened to Jon ? When did he turn into such a careless guy ?? What the heck is he doing going around with 20 year old GIRLS and living in some sex pad 150 miles away from his kids ??
I guess being a father of eight was fine for him as long as he was away from the house all day.

 

[minnieandmickey]

I'm sorry but I really feel that Jon has decided that he really doesn't want the responsibility of all that is required in a marriage with children. Even the way he talked tonight I just kept seeing a man who just wants to play. Well guess what...you have kids grow up. You are right though that 2 people need to go to couselling not one, and it is better to have 2 people divorce than stay together for the family especially when one has checked out. My il's lived together but he had checked out and was a jerk. She finally left after years of staying together for the kids. The kids were better off after they split up even though it did take time. The kids were older as well they were not young.
tigercat

I agree, he seems like he is going through a mid life crisis at 32. When he stated he was "excited" I wanted to throw a brick at him.
I've been in that spot that Kate described, hyperventilating and sobbing like I have never sobbed before. The difference is that my husband and I fought to keep our marriage together. Unfortunately I don't think Jon has any desire to do that. I also know what it is like to have parents that fight all the time. To this day I wish that my parents would get divorced, and I'm almost 40 years old. My heart goes out to all of them, especially the kids.

 

[Tuffcookie]

I happened to catch tonight's show. I am sad that Jon & Kate chose this route instead of seeking counselling first.


I sensed that Jon was angry. He said he didn't hate Kate but from what I saw, it came pretty close. He said he was a poor communicator. Do ya think????

Now if Jon carries that hate and the inability to communicate away from his marriage with Kate and thinks he can divorce and start a new relationship with someone else; well, I'd hate to be the new someone else. His emotional baggage will carry over to the new relationship. He and Kate have unfinished business.

Well, enough of my armchair analysis I would not wish divorce on my worse enemy., and I'm a divorced mom of 2.

TC

 

[NMAmy]

I'm not a Jon & Kate fan and I've managed to avoid all the drama. Yesterday, however, dd was watching the birthday party episode and it just broke my heart. When we saw the ad for last night's show, I told dd they were getting a divorce. The way they were acting was way too familiar to me from my own separation from my ex.

I wouldn't wish this situation on my worst enemy. I feel so badly for Kate--which is something I never thought I'd say.

 

[HeatherC]

To me Jon is like a lot of people I've come across. Nice guy, but all of a sudden decides that he doesn't like how "his" life is going or is "bored" with things so he basically walks out on his family. Sorry...to me you made a decision to get married and have a family. I don't care that he says he's "only 32 and not sure what he wants to do". This is the decision you made. Figure out a way to make it work.

Why the heck even have the institution of marriage where you take these vows...and he even just renewed his....and then get to "change your mind"?

Too easy for people to change their minds and then decimate their kids lives. Then they say it's best for the kids. Yeah right...tell that to a 4 year old.

I've seen it happen too many times. People need to grow up and accept their responsibilities instead of running away from them all the time.

Sorry...this subject just gets me all heated up because I've been through it too much in my life.

 

[Lorix2]

I have to say I feel extremely sad for them. As a child of divorce myself at their twins age, my heart hurts for them, including Jon & Kate.

I'm not bashing Jon, but I do feel like he was never a motivated or ambitious person and Kate is so the opposite. She knows she needs to continue on with the show and he doesn't. I think all the money they wanted to earn to support their family publicly, has come at a huge price unfortunately.

I wish their family well - it won't be easy for them.

 

[happygirl]

Aww my heart broke for Kate. I can't believe how childish Jon is acting. The thing with the kids play house. He was hell bent on not doing for Kate but when they others told him it was a bad idea he was all for moving them. To me that is petty on his part. I'm glad that they are going to keep doing the show. That will help the kids I think, I wonder what Jon did this weekend that was the nail in the coffin for Kate.

 

[leagirl12]

To me Jon is like a lot of people I've come across. Nice guy, but all of a sudden decides that he doesn't like how "his" life is going or is "bored" with things so he basically walks out on his family. Sorry...to me you made a decision to get married and have a family. I don't care that he says he's "only 32 and not sure what he wants to do". This is the decision you made. Figure out a way to make it work.

Why the heck even have the institution of marriage where you take these vows...and he even just renewed his....and then get to "change your mind"?

Too easy for people to change their minds and then decimate their kids lives. Then they say it's best for the kids. Yeah right...tell that to a 4 year old.

I've seen it happen too many times. People need to grow up and accept their responsibilities instead of running away from them all the time.

Sorry...this subject just gets me all heated up because I've been through it too much in my life.

I agree 100%....What I saw last night was a man who started a big family at a very young age and now wants to make up for all those young goofing off years he missed. So much blame has been put on Kate or the show. While I don't think she is faultless I saw last night that alot of this appears to be Jon not wanting to grow up and man up! I also don't think the show is to blame...I think this would have happened regardless. I have seen this with other friends whose husbands got tired of the responsibility involved with a family and even said that was why they wanted out.

It is a very very sad situation for all involved.